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Tuesday, December 30, 2008 6:18 pm
on the 3hundredth and 66th day of 2thousound8, I'd like to offer up 1hundred God-moments I've experienced as a testimoney and thanksgiving. (: (not in chronological order)
1) first lecture with Miss Aminah
2) first tutorial with Miss Aminah
3) first time I sat in the last row for econs lecture
4) when my classmate made a snyde remark on my non-existing intelligence (pfft)
5) when I manifested at home :D
6) when Jeslyn said she wants to go for YISS!
7) when NP poured her heart out to me at my place
8) when NP agreed to go for YISS: Liberation! :D
9) when I found NP in the school toilet... crying
10) when I accompanied NP to Novena Church
11) when Josie represented me outside CSC adoration room
12) when Josie prayed for me over the phone
13) when Josie prayed for me at CSC
14) first kiss on my head since drew and I patched
15) sng's tutorial presentation when the tension was at its peak
16) when I was late and skipped school, the tap-in machine died (PRAISE GOD FOREVER!)
17) when #16 happened again
18) first time I was called to answer a question in econs tutorial
19) first time I went down to the projector to answer a question in econs lecture
20) when Jessica S. and I drew our GP tutor's head above the clouds! (MUAHAHA!)
21) when NP and I competed "who can spin our pens longer" in GP class
22) when Huda climbed on the table to "stab" our GP tutor's back (LOL)
23) when dardar wrote me an apology card
24) 6th month anniversary!
25) when I didnt do my lit hw cos I thought it was sng's tutorial and Mr Spencer didnt yell
26) my 19th Birthday SURPRISE that baby planned(:
27) 30th Dec - date with dardar
28) when dardar and I patched
29) CHRISTMAS EVE midnight mass
30) when the little girl in church sang "Happy Birthday Jesus"
31) Leo's first session of the year about "moulding"
32) Josie's session on her previous relationship
33) 2days before YISS: Liberation, when I decided to serve
34) first day of YISS when I got all the visions that I had
35) third night of YISS (outpouring) when Marisa and I laughed till we cried (haha, THE JOY!)
36) preparing spaggetti at Marisa's
37) when Marisa walked me to church after cooking
38) when dardar picked me up after that (and he said I ALWAYS look good! aww! :D)
39) when I read dardar's proposal for New Song's Ministry
40) during the entire duration of my A's (oh my God, thankYou so much!)
41) H1 Math paper day (special thanks to Mother Mary for helping me)
42) last day of YISS: Liberation! :D
43) Cas and Leo's wedding
44) when I spoke to Eunice after Cas and Leo's wedding
45) when Audrey held me as I cried at prep camp
46) when God healed NP
47) when NP agreed to go for Amplify's Christmas Party
48) when JieJie bought me a water bottle from Borders
49) when JieJie left me a note (again!) before she flies back to Aussie
50) the morning I woke up at 6am at Muriel's house... crying
51) the evening I cried non-stop at Teri's with gfs by my side
52) that same night when the girls text me to comfort me before bed
53) the nights I couldnt sleep cos I had too much on my mind
54) the nights I stayed up late at Macs to study
55) the night I met Grace and Lydia at Macs while I was studying
56) the night there was a spider behind me in Macs (haha)
57) IH paper day (it was bad but I thank God for helping me move on)
58) Lit P3 day last day of A's! (thank God for appearing on my paper literally - cos the question was on religion :D)
59) 11.01AM 31st Dec 2008 - when baby apologised. it made everything better. (thankYou Mother Mary, for interceding while I slept)
60) 31st Dec, Marisa for talking crap with me! haha
61) 29th Dec, when dardar tried talking sense into me (I'm hurt but I know I'm gonna be healed)
62) 30th Dec, when JieJie and I plan to take Godma to Alaska, away from her husband (I love my family)
63) speaking to Eunice after outpouring session
64) speaking to Eunice during prep camp
65) speaking to Lynn the day before YISS
66) ALL the days Jessica S. and I laughed when tensions rose high in class (:
67) the night I hugged mummy (after many yrs) and she thought I was mad (ha, at least I tried, God! :D)
68) the day I did my shopping spree! :D
69) for the angbaos I've gotten this hols (thankYou, God, for providing!)
70) hopes for Sony Ericsson w595
71) Christmas Fiesta when Fr. James sang "The Prayer"
72) Christmas Fiesta when St Anthony's Choir performed (:
73) talking to Henry on the bus ride from airport
74) reading Henry's Christmas card to me
75) whenever Henry asked me abt YISS
76) confession before YISS (AWESOME!!!)
77) 19th Dec, worship behind Alex made me see God in him
78) dim sum with Amplify after YISS :D (mmm... mango pudding!)
79) watching Bolt with dardar after that
80) recollecting NP's testimony at LongHouse (:
81) 19th Dec, seeing NP at Amplify Friday
82) 19th Dec, I controlled my temper although it was BURSTING(:
83) enough money to buy coffee at starbucks for more than a month, almost everyday
84) having new Christmas clothes to wear
85) FINDING MY PURPLE STOCKINGS! (:
86) the night I manifested at home, I also heard my love song with my Saviour "Captivate Us"
87) AMPLIFY IN THE CITY!
88) finding JieJie at the Hotel that same night (haha!)
89) talking to Jessica Chew on the 28th of Dec (:
90) handing Marius an affirmation note on the first day of YISS! and hugging him.
91) talking to Marisa till late at the Thanksgiving Party :D
92) every meal time at YISS with Marisa! (hahaha)
93) every thursday's 2hr GP lesson (when I groan, "Oh God........")
94) every time I skipped PE to do hw!
95) every moment with dardar <3
96) when I spoke to Ryan at feast day Thanksgiving dinner
97) when I met up with Marv, Henry, Ham, Aggie and Ian
98) when I read aggie's prayer written before her A's
99) when I prayed the rosary before going to bed last night
100) for this very moment, as I recollect God's everlasting presence in my life
.
.
.
er, thanking God comes with ocnsequences, now I cant stop!
101) when I prayed over a girl at outpouring and God said, "and it is done" and she fell.
102) when I saw how auntie Teresa prayed over others
103) when auntie Teresa said that the saints of the group names were in the room
104) when the service team sang at the top of voices before entering the session hall
105) when everyone broke into tongues the moment they stepped into the fish tank for spiritual prep for outpouring
alright, I'll stop since 105 is a nice number. (:
Father God,
thank You for this year although it hasnt been the best I've had for the past 19 years of my life, still you came and gave me peace, hope, joy and love in the moments I've listed above.
thank You for understanding and forgiving me time and again for all the mistakes I've made. thank You for sending me friends who stood by me when I blamed you for everything.
thank You for the Cross.
great, now I've to call Novena Church to ask about confession. :D HAPPY 2009, PEEPS! Jesus loves you!
04. worthy is the lamb - Hillsong
Sunday, December 21, 2008 4:53 pm
maybe I'm just shallow.
I dont think as much as others do. neither am I as willing to do some soul-searchin sometimes. this is probably why I only know so little.
Sunday, December 14, 2008 7:42 am
how can I keep on singing Your praise?
how can I ever say enough? how amazing is your love?
AH. (:
YISS: LIBERATION was sooo awesome!!! right here, I'd just like to praise and thank Jesus (Lover of my soul, haha aww... so mushy) for calling me by name and being so persistent when I was so reluctant to serve initially.
through this experience, I've found that Secret Place in my heart where God resides and thus I've come to realise what in means to have "The Living God within me". yes, I mean literally. this has been the most tangible touch from God all my life.
in the past 4days, I've been healed in many aspects of my life and God revealed truths to me. truth that enlightens my beliefs and has showed me the way to which how I should live my life in a God-centred way. for instance, if I had not served at YISS, I would have joined gfs to club on friday. and on thursday, the first day of YISS, I was speaking to a fellow service team member who has a 'night life' and his comment on it was, "that kinda place has many temptations, especially for guys". ha. that gives me a better reason never to step into another club again. really; because I know that temptations are not of God and I will not wanna be against Him. (discalimer: I'm not implying that gfs are bad influences to me, dont get me wrong. cos I know I have been 'rebelling' against God before YISS and I wanted to do crazy things. hence, what was shared with me that morning of the first day of YISS spoke volumes.)
I feel like I've been called and set apart since a tender age and after all these years, I've come to realise that there is no way I can run away from the purpose that God has in store for me. after this liberating experience, God has renewed a passion in me to serve Him and to pursue His heart with all of mine.
like to all YISS participants, I believe, that this is also a new beginning for me.
"Now to the King eternal, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honor and glory, for ever and ever. Amen." - 1 Timothy 1:17
thank You, Jesus.
Monday, December 08, 2008 6:06 pm
the real women;
a compelling epic.
eversince I was a little girl, sitting in conversations between my mum and my 2 aunties had ingrained a powerful influencial side of me that I've always occasionally had. it feels like a gift; that connects with girls and women around me.
I think I hear a calling.
this was what mama was like. a woman of faith and LOVE. someone who believes at all cost that God is her saviour and king. Lord of all that she had in life and death. accepting and FORGIVING. kind and compassionate.
life had robbed me of these things. I've been petty and unforgiving. and only a person who knows she has everything in God can give freely. YES; freely. I've finally found the door to my own heart. broken, but made whole by God. a joy and contentment that only God can bring. it came like the wind, STRONG yet subtle. the panorama of life seems different now. nothing is logical - but I'm not confused.
a few nights ago, I cried to mama. I wished she was near and looking back now, I know I was held in her embrace. something in me made me call out to her - welling emotions from the depths of me screamed to be with her. perhaps my deepest self knows that she had been the most powerful woman I had ever known. she would not judge or ask why I was crying but still knew what I really needed.
8.46AM, as I sat with my mom and auntie, I see mama living in our midst. a lost feeling that has found its way back into my heart. mama was like no other queen at home; and I had been blessed to be called into a life of benevolence.
the modern woman isnt a modern phenomenon. it existed long before we're told or even realised.
to my beloved jiejie,
you, too, have been called. 'cause I see it in your generosity and compassion for the woman in our family and the around you. (:
I'll be serving for YISS!
Sunday, December 07, 2008 6:17 pm
thought I would blog hop this morning but I realised how emo the people around me are getting so I stopped after 2 blogs.
people are so contemplative these days (and I'm not saying that it isnt good to reflect on our lives sometimes) when are we gonna move on and be the better and happier person that we are called to be?
in the midst of our lives' issues, we tend to lose ourselves rather than find ourselves, that most people would reckon. it is true that hurdles makes us grow but that is only when we get over them.
today feels like a go-to-starbucks-and-read day. (: maybe I'll do "The Alchemist". smth deeper... smth more spiritual and womanly.
speaking of which, it's been awhile since I've been in touch with my womanly side. maybe that's why I've been feeling so lost.
aiight, gotta go. tuds.