posts
Thursday, November 30, 2006 10:34 pm
chemistry only occurs here...
(:
Wednesday, November 29, 2006 7:55 am
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, GOOS! :D
Tuesday, November 28, 2006 10:47 pm
God's dwelling here!
where?here!
where?here, IN MY HEART!
:D
Monday, November 27, 2006 2:35 pm
the worst; is yet to be the best.I'm pickin' up the pieces but they dont tell me what went wrong. times like this makes me re-think the choices that I've made and what they're worth. similarly, when you purchase a pair of pradas for $1, 452 to only find them imitated. *shrills!* yes, precisely THAT kind of horror.
how much of it can you take?
but perhaps, I just wasnt friend enough for you*.I dont have to know that I'm not going through this alone, however, these doors are accessible only from the outside and I've lost the keys to myself.
I want your heart to bleed,that's all I'm asking for.where is your heart?
Saturday, November 25, 2006 9:29 am
I was taking 132 with von last night and we're gossiping with donald
duck wan then the old indian guy sitting directly infront of me turned around and smiled! he smiled! what for? ARGHHH! it was freakin' scary.
digressing...
note to self: never ever ever ever eat mushroom pasta @ NYDC again. (1 star)
and I made von dearest walk with me to fareast (hehehe). poor girl had to bear the weight of her notebook until I was satisfied when I bought myself a ring. (: hey, the ring's got magical powers that can make me smile ok...
oGay! haha.
I miss dawn.
babe, let's go out really soon pls. that's all for this morning. if alvin doesnt reply me by noon time, I'm gonna cut my hair and you people will be in for a GIGANTIMOUS (copyrighted jess) shock.
Tuesday, November 21, 2006 8:58 pm
I'd like to sit alone now in the silence of my mind.
we've self-integrated to different parts.cpl3 chalet was aiight while I got to know tiffany and gang better. (: they are a pleasant buncha girls. it was good to have marv back for good. now, it feels like old - yet somehow different.
I used to dread and loathe changes but eversince it took a toll on me, being distant from a memory could be the bestest way one can fully grasp the purpose for it to happen. veracity is complex - bittersweet; never mere words, actions, thoughts or feelings.
I'll hate you now and love you later - aggrieved.
Sunday, November 19, 2006 8:16 pm
the Previous daySALT's 3rd anniversary BBQ turned out great! (at least the fire alarm didnt come on this time, HAHA!) the food was uncomparible to our last gathering but at least I got to meet some of the old faces and we could finally catch up without having to rush off to revision.
after that some of us walked aggie back to her crib and ended up playing bluff, haha. bored dey. caleb makes rmb'ring the number of cards released seem so easy when I could hardly recall at all! JUST BLUFF. OK? anw, at least he could genuinely observe unlike... :/ aiya, I just dont like people who tries too hard at smth they arent even sure off, y'know? haha, busted. and it's hard to fall aslp in the presence of caleb when he decides to share his broad-realm of general knowledge at abt 3am? goodness!!! it was quite irritating until he began to impress me with how the first helicopter was inspired, the world's fastest plane - when and why it was banned, the world's oldest man and etc. yikes, I nvr knew or bothered to find out abt these things!
maybe it's time, bimbo.
SUNDAY!I swear it's an effin' emo day when aiks replied my sms before flying off to shandong, china. who was I trying to convince when I told her that 'friendship isnt abt the physical distance between us but at heart'? I wish I believed in what I said cos faith is what makes it real. right? and gabeteo was nice enough to do a magic trick for me as an attempt to lighten up my mood before SALT session began. sheesh, he made me wanna cry all over again!
but he doesnt have to know that. hahaha. it's good to know that people care and I wanna be so brave for them.
scorch me, Sunshine!
Thursday, November 16, 2006 8:38 pm
went to work today and it was boring.
good to see you, henry. I actually felt better over dinner but now the emotions are filling me to the brim again.
to my dearest seedlings, gen misses you to bits. it scares me to imagine what it'd be like without you even though the end is over and the beginning has alrdy begun. our laughter that rings in my head now brings tears to my eyes. I cant stop missing you guys!
lookin' back on this yr, if this hadnt been true, I wouldnt know that I've made so many friends that genuinely care. thankyou all:
dawn
mary
aiks
joshua
yien
CHARLIE!
zhuwen
shahril
sheng long
samuel
sann
sarah
vithya
ching
kemp
khaarthik
cherlyn
anqi
(if you dont know who you are)
... for being there.
Wednesday, November 15, 2006 11:11 pm
how can you tell if their promises are real?
should I risk my mended heart for a chance in...
I say nothing.
an emo/punk lookin' ahlian approached me outside cineleisure today and asked, "ni shi hua ren ma?" HA.
lady, perhaps if you had a tinge of idea that I am not
hua ren, why did you enquire me in mandarine? think harder without looking at your skirt cos maybe those pink/black checkards are making your head swirl.
(:
in case you're wondering, although I hated learning the language, it doesnt mean that I deny my race cos it is exactly what makes me who I am. besides, asians are an exotic bunch and I like the label.
LOL. shut up, gen.
Tuesday, November 14, 2006 10:54 pm
Big Girls Don't Cry - FergieVerse 1:
The smell of your skin lingers on me now
Your probably on your flight back to your home town
I need some shelter of my own protection baby
To be with myself and center of clarityPeace, SerenityChorus:
I hope you know, I hope you know
That this has nothing to do with you
It's personal, Myself and I
We've got some straightenin' out to do
And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket But I've got to get a move on with my lifeIts time to be a big girl nowAnd big girls don't cryDon't cry
Don't cry
Don't cry
Verse 2:
The path that I'm walkingI must go aloneI must take the baby steps until I'm full grownFairytales don't always have a happy ending, do they
And I foresee the dark ahead if I stayVerse 3:
Like the little school mates in the school yard
We'll play jacks and uno cards
I'll be your best friend and you'll be mineValentineYes you can hold my hand if u want toCause I want to hold yours tooWell be playmates and lovers and share our secret worldsBut its time for me to go homeIts getting late, dark outsideI need to be with myself and center of clarity
Peace, Serenity
---
really missed the seedlings today and I slept through lunch.
and I've been accepted into floorball, hopefully ms yap will let me go. :/
it's over now.
these guarded tears of vexation and a satirical relief has been looming in me for such a long time that once I began to cry, there's hardly anything that could stop these tears from falling.
aiks: "I'll miss you, gen."
joshua: "... and this is definitely not the last you'll see of us"
charlie: *in his
screaming eyes.*
yadotemdegguhyllop.
:D
henry:
he came to my rescue.
ily. ily. ily. *hugs tightly*
I'll nvr wanna forget the bittersweetness of this day.
Monday, November 13, 2006 6:00 am
monday's the new friday the 13th.
there goes the national anthem on tv - 6 o'clock on the dot.
five and a half hours more to go before we face our ultimate decree. the past few hours of lying in bed did not give due rest but mounting fretfulness with every passing and in a quirk of fate, unearths solace in anxiety and fear.
'tis, ladies and gentlemen, is veracity - sight without vision, sound without song.
then perhaps this is when Faith steps in to hang me on thin air until I find vigor to climb again.
GOD! I'M WRETCHED. STRIPPED and very afraid.no one bawls for help when they know there isnt any to be found.
silenced.
deadpanned.
I'm ready when I'm not.
Sunday, November 12, 2006 5:05 pm
mundane sunday.
sometimes I'd wish I were a boy and could play soccer so I can join servers. or if it werent for the rain, I'd be swimming or working my arse off at the gym now. haaa.
yeah right. soon.
I was chatting with pearlene last night and golly me! little did I know what we had in common. it's amazing how you find people of the same interests in places you least expect them to be; in this case, we met in chinese class.
si! the place where I found most foreign beyond my comfort zone. and if you must know, she's not all cheenapingpong. (: hurray! for chinese language is a salient barrier that I cant conquer. till the day when it becomes vital to me, I'd rather squawk like a duck. haha.
and today, I was slacking in the salt room for hours with nothing to do but join in a obtuse banter between caleb and anyone who had smth to jag him. so here goes:
caleb: y'know, it's damn easy to cheat in the O'levels! you can hide a book in the toilet and the examiner wont even know!
aggie (I think?): huh? in the toilet bowl ah?
caleb: OF COURSE NOT! the book will get wet! you can hide it in... cant rmb what you call that. the cervix?
HAHAHA... denser than oil!me: you have no integrity at all, I say.
caleb: *pauses for a moment* OK LAH! *digs his pocket* I'll give you the 50cent I picked up this morning in the canteen.
pffft!!!
haha.
k that's all I can recall for now. D-day tmr; be there if you must.
Monday, November 06, 2006 10:48 pm
you call on her with such ardent affection that razes my very existence.
dont I make you laugh?should I try harder?givin' up cant be a bad thing all the time. I want my umpteenth go at
something else.
Von, I'm missing you trucks, lorries, buses and TRAINS!
another week passed and it felt good getting wasted even though there's still much to do. fortunately, as chinese A's came to an abrupt end, we're boiled down to our one last hurdle of the year - OP. yet, it actually isnt all IF we're conditionally 'advanced', which ironically I wish I will be for that one last chance. ha, it's a sick cycle carousel that never ends. less than 10months of both physical and emotional turmoil has driven me to far ends of the earth but nothing's gonna take a slow turn.
I would say that the weekend was well spent, making an hour trip down to katong for laksa and savouring
new zealand ice-cream on saurday night. (: yumm. it wouldve been more worth it, like ash said, if we had travelled earlier. oh well. next time!
as of sunday, here's a very Happy Confirmation CPL'06 for those whom I didnt get to meet and greet yesterday. hugs.
afterwhich, I went down to vivo then I bought a pair of corduroy pants from pull and bear. yayness! it looked soo darn hot on me! hahaha. nvm that. I'm bombastically elated to find a pair of corduroy that FITS. hurray to me! later on aloysius, muriel, xuan, evan, huijun and I watched The Covenant at J8. people dont be deceived! it wasnt as good as Jo said it would be.
alright, it's been a relatively tiring day as my attention span shortens by the minute.
I'm sorry if I'd hurt you today.
Friday, November 03, 2006 10:43 pm
ALRIGHT, so chinese was pretty manageable but my oral grades will definitely demerit the overall. moreover, I'm sure that if it was do-able for me, it would be even simpler for others who have been consistently faring well in the language. haa, whatever will be, will be.
well, as much as I dislike the subject, I wont deny it either that I will be missing chinese lessons so much. lao shi has been so supportive and patient with us all year despite having to try and wake us up more than three-quarters of the period. HAHA! always babble-practice for the first half-an-hour and then we'd fall asleep. (: aww, what adorable babies! ... NOT! ha. I feel sorry for her whenever I think of it, and especially even for our last lesson, I couldnt have slept better that afternoon. :x she didnt even try to wake us up that day, sigh. I'm gonna miss her... poking our sides. (huh??) ANW, I hope I've done her proud on my script today.
movin' on... my class stayed back for pw from noon till 6plus this evening all for nothing when we couldve left as soon as we're done with our assessment. hur! tell me,
what's new? it's not a matter of getting used to her unorganised schedules (that you wonder why she came up with in the first place), but if she had ever taken our welfare into mind. ahh, wouldnt life be made easier for one and all? I'm grateful for our assessor today, so kind and motherly, that made my bestest pw consultation thus far.
now that I'm hooked on
Goong, I'm gonna try to play the cds that muriel has lent me again. ): and I wont give up! LOL. ok, disgraceful eh. next up, PRISON BREAK!
chill-O!
Wednesday, November 01, 2006 5:51 pm
I dont get all that hype over
emo and stuff 'cause it really doesnt matter to me at all. music IS but only music - a freedom of expression.
REAL music has no genre. (: