Also A LEVELS ARE ENDING (in 3 days) I CANT BELIEVE WE SURVIVED IT (almost) I mean this feels so surreal 

I can't wait to go back to church tmr!! I have not been to church for a month (???) and I really felt like I backslided :( This empty, lost, void feeling. I know I shouldn't have placed As > God but :((( 

I don't know but maybe, just maybe, I might actually miss studying after A levels end. Will definitely miss nights like this -- studying in school till 9pm // watching horror movie trailers // just chit chatting and laughing // so so so thankful to have classmates like these that make studying enjoyable, that make this whole arduous journey more bearable. Blessed :) 

I'm a mess, I really am.

This is not love it isn't 

Just what did I get myself into again

Told myself I would never make the same mistake but here I am committing the exact same mistake, fully aware of the consequences 

Fool.