Exam period. 2 more papers. Barely prepared for it.

Just a thought which got me thinking.
Guess not studying hard enough really shows when all anxiety and panic sets upon you when you have no freaking clue how to do it even when its mcq, a 1 out of 4 chance of getting it right. The thought of negative marking downplays your confidence in picking in the right answer and you constantly doubt yourself whether the one chosen is indeed the one. Then after it is all over, you realise what a stupid mistake you have made, coz the first answer you thought of was the one. Thereafter, your mind becomes so preoccupied with all the mistakes from the paper, you can hardly concentrate on the other papers.

So now i gotta tell myself, FOCUS pris, FOCUS. That was just one paper. You still have the remaining two to do well and offset your mistakes. I often tell others to put the past behind them, but in reality i do not practice that. What a contradiction.

How will the next few days turn out, I'm not sure myself.

I think I wasn't suited for uni life in the very first place. I often lack the motivation and discipline to study. I was never consistent in my work. I guess this was one of the reasons I chose the poly route instead of the other. I must admit, I kind of enjoyed what I studied in poly, but in uni, its a total different story. I dread all the modules I am taking and always feel inferior to others, since they are so smart, their presentations were beautiful, they are naturally good speakers. So no matter how much effort you put in, the end results is still the same, constantly either an average or even below average student. Perhaps if I had started working after graduating from poly, my life might be different, I won't have to worry that poor grades will not land me an internship and ultimately a job. As i read how successful someone is, undeniably, you will feel envious, and how you wish it was you in her place. But in reality, it doesn't work this work. Grades, grades, grades decide your first job, an internship, exchange opportunity, etc. If only society can place less emphasis on grades, the world will be a happier place to live in.

Today has been one exhausting day. Tired to the max.

Volunteered for the paint-a-home project at a elderly home @ tampiness and the project name says it out, obviously to help them paint their walls. So all the brushing, rolling, scrubing, scraping, climbing up and down, squatting, sitting, left me with a sharp pain on my knees. I am barely bend without yelping in pain. Despite the physically draining workout, it was quite a good experience i must say, though i think our leader wasn't really effective.

Lemme rant out our unhappiness. Firstly, our leader didn't even lift a finger to do any painting, basically she just order us around when needed. Secondly, you can't even rest for a split second, coz the moment she spots you doing nothing, when you are just resting, she will immediately find something for you to do. Next, her management skills is almost non-existence. Because the floor weren't completely lined with newspapers, there were lots of paint splatters and we had to scrap, scrub with the help of just a piece of rag and our hands, to clean off the paint. (Imagine cinderella being punished by her step-mother and she has to squat on the floors and clean the place spick and span.) As i was cleaning, i am being reminded that i barely do the housework at home. lol. Lastly, we were the last group to leave :((((( We saw most groups leaving bout 5 plus and there we were still slogging and cleaning our guts out. But, the elderly were really friendly and one was damn talented, he was playing the piano for several hours, providing us with free entertainment.

Ate at manpuku @ tampiness 1, first time there. not bad, ate the ramen. Got a ride home from susie's mr chew. thanks.

Random note: I wish i was smarter, more hardworking, had an intelligent mind. I think i have a pea brain. meh meh. (woohoo, 12 more days to last day of work, down under in 14 more days. can't wait for some R&R)

Judgement day, yet another horrendous, disappointing semester. I was quite nonchalent till this morning as i really did not know what to expect. However, truth betold, the feeling kind of suxs when it turns out even worse. I was really disappointed by my OM grade, it so wasn't what i was expecting at all, i thought the paper was relatively do-able. But no point crying over spilled milk.

So the end of my first year basically forges the path which i will be taking. No honours, since i don't even qualify in my first year, whatsmore the next year. So i now got to start thinking seriously whether i want to graduate in 2.5 years or 3 years. It will also means no chance of going for an exchange program. I would be lying if i were to say i am not a least bit upset by it. But whats done is done, no point broading over it. I shall just have to make full use of my remaining schooling days before i eventually enter the workforce where yet another hurdle awaits for me to climb.

Next up, i hope to be able to embark on an OCIP/YEP program during the december holidays. *Cross my fingers and toes* that i will be able to get a place somewhere given the limited vacancies to these places.

Lastly, i am still thinking whether i should hold a party to celebrate my 21st birthday, or just have a private hush hush family gathering???? Give your comment/suggestion if you happen to come across this :DDDDDDDDD

~I NEED MY HOLIDAY PRONTO ~ 20 more days and counting

Its the holidays, but yet, it doesn't really feel like one
Everyday revolves around eating, sleeping, working, for the sake of money i am enduring 1 more month of work.
But guess what, i actually skipped one day of work last week to go play, first to qian hu for their fish spa experience, then its to some hideout @ seletar, nice place though we couldnt see the sun set as it was going to rain, so instead, we saw lotsa lightning. Realli gotta thank liren for the ride, if not we wouldn't have been able to make it to those places

On the sidenote, i seem to be spending excessively especially when i head out, i gotta curb this and minimise the days that i go out. Furthermore, even since i got introduced to online shopping, i have already bought 2 items, bleah, more money going out :S:S:S

Been really busy these days, gotta plan plan plan for my trip. Intending to head to the snow mountains, but i think we sort of started planning too late, most places seem to be booked and we can't afford the expensive hotels. Pray that we can find a place and get the coach tixs, if not we will have to go for Plan B, which at this point in time there is no Plan B. (hmm, Plan B could be skydiving, hot air balloon ride, journey through the great ocean road) haha. Maybe i should just call some tour planner to plan it for us, save us all the hassle. LOL. me and my lazy self.

1 month hurry pass, cause it will mean end of work, then comes my trip, rest abit then its full speed ahead for orientation camp. That's summer baby!!!

Exams are O.V.E.R, Hello summer!!!
The long awaited break and many many post-exam activities to come... woohoo...
Lotsa things to plan plan plan....
Needa to catch up with lotsa sleep which i sacrificed over the draining week
Needa catch up with frens
Lastly, I NEED TO FIND A J.O.B (coz obviously i need/want money)

Update again when something interesting comes along. Cant wait for thursday, catching my first musical ever, CHICAGO, woot.

Finally, MNO project will be O.V.E.R after tmr
It been one hell of a week, from wed-fri, i have been in school till dark, rushing the video, obviously, i have to thank all my group mates for their effort, especially Jess, Clement, Jingyang and Alex for staying till 2-3am , putting in their utmost effort to get it done...
THANK YOU!!!

The following 3 weeks will be a rollar coaster ride as i have a project due every monday of the week... Before you know it, it will be the exam period once again... >.<

Oh, yesterday, i met liane at cartel at J8 for supper before meeting clement n jess to finalise our video, had a fantastic time, coz firstly, the snackers and cakes were half price after 9, den the drink we had was good, all in all, a sinful late night, den off to jess's condo, return clements his mac (borrowed it the night before to get the 2 mins video up, and it was quite funny, coz my dad and sis thought i bought it... lol...), stayed till bout 12 plus, no train back, so nice clement sent me back. Oh, n before that i popped by gy's place to use the toilet, coz their condo's toilet is locked at night, security so tight... haha...

All in all, i felt a great sense of satisfaction after the video completion, all our hardwork and nonsensical creativity put into it, though we are not sure how our video is rated against the others, since i have not seen the other groups one yet, we can only anticipate and hope for the best. Good Luck :)

Business faculty has e-learning this week, no school, but nothing to rejoice about, its really the time to catch up on school work and the tons of projects assigned for this sem, and whatsmore, the e-learning stuff we have to do are quite crappy

I remembered i watch a few parts of a black n white film just to ans some mno qns, but the chat room was so unconducive and ineffective

I am always so tired and exhausted :( not a good sign, but i have been sleeping lesser than b4

Projects are so time-consuming, and connections are definitely strongly needed in certain areas, a lesson learnt

But obviously i wouldnt miss to have some fun now and then, so i caught the movie Alice in Wonderland with the usual few, den arcade and a chillax macs session to end off the day

Quite a number of work to catch up with, but where is the TIME!!!

This is such a fragmented post, coz my mind is shutting off very soon, shall end off with some picures....