Two steps forward, one step back...

I did it on purpose.

Just decided to add an entry for the year.

Amazingly, more than a year has flown past since my last post. I never realised it was so quick. I thought I'd better post something - don't want my blog to die of stagnancy.

But this year! Yes, this year! 2013 was a good year for me. I had some solid sense of self-sufficiency and managed to push ahead with my goals. For that I am grateful.

I also progressed spiritually (everyday, in fact) with newfound skills and knowledge. For that I am grateful.

Funny how we sometimes lose sight of the forest for the trees, focusing on all the details which irk us. When we take a step back, we see the full picture. Or, maybe we can't even see the full picture at that point in time, but like what Steve Jobs said, we can only connect the dots looking backwards.

Sometimes we want things to hurry up. I'm guilty of that. I wish things could move along faster, so I can see the outcome and the purpose of what I'm going through - especially when times are not too ideal.

But then I guess everything has its own time. The seeds of karma will ripen at the right moment, I believe. Che sara, sara... what will be, will be.

So as much as I'm looking forward to 2014 to see what's in store for me, I know I can't rush things. Live one day at a time, as they say. But then again, since it's coming to the end of 2013, I might as well look forward to 2014!

Happy New Year in advance!

The end of the world... Or is it?

Boo!

Oh. My. God.

9 months. For 9 months I went MIA. Well not really.

I guess I was too lazy to write. Or perhaps, I didn't know what to write.

But it's December 2012! Sooo many things have happened since my last post in March!

I know, I know, I always say that, yes, yes. But for the record, I did get a foldable bicycle. And I'd been using it to explore the riverside park near my house. Haven't used it for a couple of months now, though.

But that's because of work! Yes, work, work. Occupies my daylight hours, and by the time I come home - exhausted and all - why in the world would I want to cycle? There. Justified.

But what I wanted to address today... is the end of the world. Oh come on, you really believe that? Okay, here's my perspective. I'm a spiritual person, so I've been following what the spiritual community has been saying. And I believe them. Well, naturally.

So. 21 December 2012. Mayans say it's the end? Well, I guess they were not wrong. But most of us have misinterpreted it. They didn't mean it's the end of the world. Rather, it's more like the end of an old age.

You see, it's simply a transition. We're moving from an old period to a new one. It's all part of Earth's ascension into higher spiritual planes. Humanity wants to ascend, you see. So here's the deal: it's said that a new wave of energy will be sweeping the planet on that day - possibly at 11:11am, if I'm not wrong. (Don't ask me why that time; it's another story altogether.)

Now, this new wave of energy is a highly spiritual energy which will open up even more the channels of spirituality in us humans. So there's a higher chance of us being more spiritual. And that's a good thing, no?

And to the question of whether or not we will feel anything, I've come across a saying that goes something like this: "For those who are spiritual, they will feel the new energy. For those who are not (at least at that point in time), they won't feel anything - it's as though nothing has happened."

Well, I guess that's the gist of it. Of course, if you do your research, there are many, many variations of what 21 December 2012 will bring. Some really think the end of the world is likely, while others think it's absolute bullshit.

No worries, you don't have to believe anything. No need to take sides. Why don't you experience it for yourself? Yeah. Just see what happens when that day comes. If an asteroid comes hailing towards you, so be it. If you start to become more open-minded in the days that follow, so be it - and good for you!

I want to ride my bicycle!

So it's now the March school holidays. The past few weeks have been eventful, no doubt.

I've been wanting to get a foldable bicycle for some time now. There's this great riverside park near my house and I want to make full use of it.

Well I do take strolls there but I can't possibly walk the whole stretch of it - unless time is an illusion (actually it really is, but that's another story). So I plan to get a bicycle - foldable because one, it's the in thing these days, and two, if it can be folded, why not?

Hmm... it's been awhile since I last rode on a bicycle. I used to ride frequently when I was a little younger... those days I was living at my previous house. Since I've moved to this one, I never got round to cycling - not to mention even owning a bicycle. Oh wait a minute, I think I do own one, but it's rusting somewhere because I've hardly used it in years and hence, my wanting to get a new one.

So this is it, then. I hope my new bicycle will open a new chapter in my tiny, little life and at the same time, revisit an old chapter that I once wrote... somewhere in the illusion of time...

Nothing lasts forever...

Ahhh! February 2012! Where was I?

Wow. So the new year has begun a long time ago. Looks like January's over.

Well, I've been working these days, and am quite glad to say that I'm enjoying it so far. I guess life can take a turn for the better as it does for the worse.

"Nothing lasts forever." This phrase rings true on almost every aspect of life. It's quite sad to know that even a good thing can't last forever. But it gives us hope when we know it's the same for a bad thing.

Cycles, cycles.

But then again, since nothing is permanent here in this life, what do we strive for? What do we look forward to? What do we hold on to? Nothing?

It seems so funny when we are so attached to something; when we grasp at something, never wanting to let go. Or when we want something to live up to our expectations - because this is the way it should be.

So what now? Let go? Don't be attached to anything? Be detached? Don't have any expectations? Because we'll only be disappointed if we do any of these things?

I guess so, huh?

Where does it end?

Hah! It's December already. See what I mean? This year is gonna vanish any moment now...

2011 has been one of the quickest years that have happened to me. I enjoyed 2010, but I don't remember it coming to an end so quickly. Or maybe I did. It's just that 2011 began in a snap and now it's gonna disappear in a snap too!

Oh gosh. So what have I achieved this year? It's the ol' looking-back-through-the-year question.

This year has been quite a fruitful one, I believe. I graduated from my course, and am now working. I am grateful to have pursued something that I always wanted to pursue six years ago. The wait had been long, but my days at school were one of the best periods of my life. Period.

I've gained skills which I didn't have before, knowledge which I was ignorant of before, and friendships which I haven't been blessed with before. All of these have produced memories - sweet memories - which I will hold dear.

And now as I set my eyes on the future, I can only guess what will be in store for me. As each stage of our life is completed, we create new goals and aspirations, hopes and wishes that we would like to see ourselves achieving in the near future.

It's hard for us to be satisfied, huh? It's hard for us to just stay put, to be happy with our lot, to stop struggling, to stop climbing the ladder of life. Only natural, we would say. When will we be satisfied, then? Or will we ever be satisfied?

The never-ending wheel of life, huh? The Buddhists call it samsara. Will we ever reach nirvana? Total satisfaction, total detachment, total bliss. It seems a far-off dream.

I can only wait and see... and the wait shall be long...

Where do I go from here?

Ahh... I am finally back in familiar territory after such a long hiatus.

And with good reason too.

The last post I tried publishing by clicking the "publish post" button just couldn't be published. It was as if the button wasn't working any longer.

I decided to wait till the next day to try again. And the same thing happened: the button couldn't work.

I waited yet another day, and another, and another. And still my post couldn't be published. After awhile I decided to give up.

And so my blog was left hanging in limbo. The months passed. I checked back now and then, viewing its simple facade without logging in.

Until just recently I decided to tackle the problem. I "googled" the problem - as I'm sure anyone would've done - and there were so many solutions I could try to see if the problem could be solved.

My eyes fell quickly on one of them. It was about some compatibility button at the end of the address bar; someone said all he had to do was click on it and the problem was solved.

I did exactly that.

Four months have passed now. I'm about to complete my course and looking for a job at the moment.

Ironic, huh? Everyone's talking about escaping the rat race. And look what I'm doing? Eagerly getting myself into it.

I guess it arises out of a sense of security... a sense of wanting to be self-reliant. I mean, for a person my age, I can't go talking about escaping the rat race when I haven't even started earning my first proper paycheck, right?

Perhaps I need to experience the rat race for myself... its highs and lows. And see if it's really all that bad... is there really no end to it? A vicious cycle? Or if there's really no escaping it? Once you're in, you can't get out?

Or... what if I took a different path from the very start? The path less travelled. Do something totally different - the unconventional route. I can only imagine eyebrows raised... or are they frowning?

Ah well... I wonder what my next step will be. What new chapter is in store for me. In times like these I really wish I could predict the future...

I'll no longer be a virgin this Saturday!

And the month of May has arrived.

I'm in the midst of my study week for the coming exam.

School's been pretty fast-paced and intensive. But I'm hoping I'll be able to pull through.

It's been pouring heavily these few days. And always in the afternoon hours. But I love the rain. A nice change from the lethargic heat of the sun.

My country's up for elections this Saturday. And I'll be casting my "virgin vote", like how a friend puts it.

I've been trying my best to follow election-related news, if not for my heavy workload. I already can't help feeling guilty if I blindly cast my vote on Saturday without knowing any of the proposals put up by the contestants. Definitely not how I want my "virgin vote" to be.

And then suddenly another big story emerged on the world stage: Osama bin Laden was shot dead.

Oh boy, I was ecstatic. It was better than watching how the bad guys die in a movie - this time it was real! But I felt they wanted to temper the story a little. I mean, why can't we see Osama's body? The statements were all very brisk and a little hushed up. Maybe it's because they don't want to provoke the remaining terrorists by blatantly celebrating Osama's demise.

Either way, world leaders have also warned about a possible retaliation from the terrorists. So we're back on alert, no doubt.

Anyway, that's about all I can say for now. Here's to an uncertain future...