What is a husband

When a woman look for a husband, she meant to look for a soulmate, one that is hard to come by. Many might think they have found the one but at last, most of the time it’s a totally different package underneath the ‘soulmate’ cover.

She is not looking for someone to do the household chores, something that any maid can do.

She is not looking for someone to bring home the bacon, something that she is capable of doing it herself.

A husband is a soulmate, not a person who can do what she is able to do nor someone who is replaceable by a maid. A soulmate is irreplaceable but a maid is.

A husband is what I have found but a soulmate...I am not sure.

Blaming

 When you blame everyone and everything else for anything that happens, you will never be a better man.

The role of a Father

Since when the only role of a Father is just to bring home the bacon?

The children’s education, physical and emotional health is nothing to do with him? All he needs to do is open his mouth to make comments, the mother is supposed to figure out all problems and come up with all sorts of solutions?

Or is it just because I am a highly educated full time stay at home mom, therefore I have the responsibility to shoulder everything?

Even every aspect of the household, finances and families relationship falls under my plate. Most of the time I feel like a single parent to a pair of children :(

Forever is too long

 Forever is too long, that is an understatement.

Sorry doesn’t mean anything

Why say sorry but don’t mean it.

Why feel remorseful but don’t do anything about it.

Why feel bad but keep repeating it.

No matter how kind hearted you are, repetition of mistakes is never acceptable nor forgivable.

Nothing more to say

When you almost slipped and fall due to wet floor caused by someone else, not once, not twice but countless times. You finally flared up but the culprit blame you for throwing a fit and commented that we are a family...family should give and take, what more is there to say. I lost count how often and how badly I got injured due to his negligence and laziness.

Hopeless

 When talking doesn’t work, I don’t even want to waste any energy arguing. Laying all my cards on the table yet he chooses to be even more persistent in winning all arguments, even the smallest of all. All hope is gone. Wait is all that is left, waiting for the day the little ones are no longer little so I can get my freedom from all.

希望

 一个连表面功夫都懒得做的人还有什么希望。。。

Love myself

“I’M LEARNING TO LOVE MYSELF. IT’S THE HARDEST THING I’VE EVER DONE.”

Me, Myself and I

 Sometimes I wished I could retreat to a place where there is only me, myself. I do not know whether I will be a happier person but at least everything I do will be for me, myself and I only. Something which I have not done for the last 25 years of my life.

Whose responsibility is it?

A dialogue that took place this morning, but it’s a familiar one that has been repeated countless times over the past years.

Him: I’ve promised W to bring him to helix bridge. He mentioned that he wants to check it out as it looks like a DNA structure.

Me: Oh...have we not brought him there before?

Him: No, never. There are so many places in the country that we have not been to.

Me: Well...we had lots of free weekends over the years but you have never brought us anywhere other that the neighbourhood.

Him: (furrowed his eyebrow)

Me: Well...is it not true? We have a car that doesn’t even travel places. You know of so many interesting places and tasked to plan our weekends, but we always ended up not knowing where to go. Sometimes we even had to just come back home for movies.

Him: (gives an angry and stop being unreasonable look)

Me: Shouldn’t you be feeling guilty and apologetic instead of feeling indignant?

婚姻是爱情的坟墓

The title translates to “Marriage is the tomb of love”, a very cliche phrase but it’s undeniably true. Take tantrums for example:

Before marriage......the girl is upset and throws a tantrum, it will turn the the guy’s world upside down, he’ll try all means to please the girl and find out what did he do to upset her, follow by promises that he will not do it again. He will try his very best not to repeat the same thing.

New marriage......the wife is upset, throws a tantrum and give hints on why she’s angry. The husband tries to pacify the wife by buying her things, taking initiative to help out with chores. The wife simmers down.

Years of marriage with kids......the wife is upset, she ignores him but life goes on, she continues to fulfill her duty as a wife and mother. The husband is aware that she is upset, days went by, the husband is upset that the wife did not simmer down but continue to ignore. The wife spoke up, the husband throws a fit and complain that the wife is being unreasonable.