At the brink of recess week, and im having mixed feelings. Glad that its a break from tedious school but you're leaving on saturday and i'll be having midterms while you're away. :(

sometimes i feel like as one gets older, you just can't want some things anymore. you're expected to grow up, stand on your own two feet, be indepedent of everyone else. well deep down inside i really dont want you to go.. i'll miss you quite badly. and i've grown so dependent on you that its hard to even imagine us apart. sigh.

//All these pain of yesterday still hits me like a ton of bricks. time hasn't changed a thing.. i still wish you could be mine, and only mine. time marches on but i feel left behind. trapped. stuck where i cant seem to reach you. i wish you could hug me and let me cry till i've no tears left.

" which was should i go? go left, where nothing's right? or go right, where nothing's left?"

School

NUS finally accepted!! So yes, all's right with the world again.

And one more day before the package arrives, and together with it, things to be done. (i'm sure of it) I'm really curious what mods i'd be taking, or relegated to doing this sem. Hmmmmm.

So anyway, 22/1/2011 marks our 1 & 1/2 years anniversary :)

Glad we are where we are today. Though the starting maybe kinda vague, i'm honestly happy to be here.

Mad Jack's tonight yay finally satisfying my(our) chocolate cake craving!

Okay off to make lunch.

This place really is my ranting space, I realise. Only when I have things to write about do I come here. Oh well...

I'm scared that if we keep on, things are not gonna resolve themselves, and we are just gonna get hurt even more. Big issues that where there is really no compromise. It scares me. That we have to live with the choices we make. Sometimes it's a no turning back kinda thing. Like on our first date. No turning back. Didn't give it much thought then but well, i dunno, things dont always work themselves out. And, living with a history.. It breaks my heart, knowing that... You were once someone I don't recognise. Someone I never thought you could have been. Still can't wrap my mind around it, even now. You know how scary that is? Acceptance is really hard to do. I feel like I don't know anything anymore. I wish circumstances made it easier for us. I know we've been together like almost a year and a half but.. Its still scary how much a person who was once a stranger, now means to you. How a person could complete your life and make you depend on him. Oh I don't know what I'm trying to say anymore. Goodnight world. Ps. NUS hasn't given an answer.

The whole world's looking for love. And sometimes i forget that i've already found my 'one', the one person to tide you through the difficult times, the one person to share everything with, the one who really knows you.

I sometimes only remember his shortcomings and not his strengths; what he's not done rather than what he's done. I'm sorry for that. I hope we will have a better year next year. There's so much more my heart feels but i can't translate into words.

Guess i just wanna tell him that i love him and i'll remember to forget, and i'm really blessed to have him. :)

:(

dont try, just cause im in a short skirt. dont. urgh.

well, maybe im just tired and cranky but today was.. i dunno. disappointing? kinda. we're different now, or maybe, im different now. gotta roll with the punches. thats life, dudes.

and, i missed you today.