Found in my email this morning. If one or more don’t sound familiar – you weren’t paying attention!
I Owe My Mother 1. My mother taught me
TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE .
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."
2. My mother taught me
RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
3. My mother taught me about
TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"
4. My mother taught me
LOGIC .
" Because I said so, that's why."
5. My mother taught me
MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
6. My mother taught me
FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
7. My mother taught me
IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."
8. My mother taught me about the science of
OSMOSIS .
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
9. My mother taught me about
CONTORTION-ISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"
10. My mother taught me about
STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
11. My mother taught me about
WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
12. My mother taught me about
HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
13. My mother taught me the
CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
14. My mother taught me about
BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"
15. My mother taught me about
ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
16. My mother taught me about
ANTICIPATION .
"Just wait until we get home .."
17. My mother taught me about
RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home !"
18. My mother taught me
MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."
19. My mother taught me
ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"
20. My mother taught me
HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."
21. My mother taught me
HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
22. My mother taught me
GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."
23. My mother taught me about my
ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
24. My mother taught me
WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."
And my favorite:
25. My mother taught me about
JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you"
And I must add my favorite Bigmama-ism, who taught me
WATER SAFETY:
“I don’t want you going near that pool until you learn how to swim!”
What did your mother teach you?Thanks for visiting my blog today.
