marvel at Your greatness; how could You.

hey you beautiful gorgeous ones, its been sometime since i last posted and despite my almost-shutting lids i will do something about this undesired calmness.

yes school has started and despite my everyday countdowns, time did not slow down. oh why, oh why. okay, its not that going back to school is a bad thing but it is indeed tiring. staying up late to rush project presentaion, to complete those piling tutorial, phew. oh and have i told you i have a super fierce alarm clock now -dad. LOL, daddy wakes me up in the most unique way of his; by scolding. and he never fails to. though it isnt a great way to start a day, its more effective than my handphone alarm clock:: ) so daddy, i still love you.

oh yes, had net today and it was super fun! those crazy people i loove. haha! we camwhored in the rain. LOL. i know what are you thinking, but , not today cause i havent uploaded the photos. ahaha, too lazy. but people people, I LOVE YOU and love my netties more:: ) you guys are the thing i look forward to every single week, and mark the start of my weekends great<3. continue growing strong in the Lord and lets move as one family towards where God would bring us to. stay binded, knitted as one sweater. uh, i mean family. LOL!

okay i will update you more more soon. haha, look at the time. and yes, i promise pictures all at one short. hoho, love you big! goodnight/morning<3.

who could comprehend of Your greatness, Your faithfulness, Your grace and mercy. underserving yet You gave.

more than a string puppet that dances

im sitting at this foreign lappy staring at michelle play her obsession, worms. so obsessed homework becomes her opportunity cost (oh crap, how did macroecons barge into my blog!) LOL, yes school is starting tomorrow and im experiencing an entanglement of emotions; excitemet and sian-ness. haha, am rather happy to be going back to class, honestly i've missed my classmates:: ) sian-ness, i guess its needless to say. haha!

just came back from church and actually decided to go home to complete my homework. but somehow i landed up in my aunt's house and am feeling utterly lost because i dont know what homework to do. classmates, come online! haha, total essential beings for me to survive in poly. they ensure i get to school on time, remind me of assignments and homeworks. classmates customise for this oh-so-forgetful me. TB28, i loovee you!

i could stand in Your house, yet forget who You really are. draw me to know the One in the house. knowYou like never before<3>

alright people, least you call me naggy i shall stop here:: ) keep missing me and i'l miss you too. and did i mention, i'l miss you much regiondee; all the boys and girls. takcare and remember who you are<3.>

not just lip services, not just an act for show, or to impress. not just tears that obligates but a heart so true.

you said 'the grass is greener on the other side'

had a long long day today but post is going to be short cause i am YOL(yawning out loud) haha! slept really late yesterday because i was trying to complete my homework but to no avail:: ( had BA society meeting in the morning and it was not too bad, just feeling totally 'fresh' and i guess thats normal being new:: ) ahaha, but i forsee fun days with the group. and yes, im loving my SCOs.

the publicty for dream machine was not too bad. i was paired with ian diong to do door-to-door handbilling, madness! the blocks at yishun are extremely huge! no amos, long legs dont seem to be able to cover more. LOL! i almost died-ed after the first block but ian was patient enough to put up with a complaining partner, thanks buddy! though the people werent as receptive, we are still believeing that God would breakthrough and begin to help us break ice in the community. good job all dreamers, give yourself a thumbs up and a pat on the back<3.

then it was edge, something i look forward to every single week! woosh, jeremy preached on the fear of God out of respect, reverence and honour. and that is certainly a healthy fear that i would want to base my life upon. when we possess such fear, we'd be incline to His words and to do His will. yet God isnt there with a thunder bolt to strike us but with a pair of tender loving hands to holod us in His arms. my God is an awesome God!

right readers, now tuck me in bed and read me a story that begins with 'once upon a time'. have to wake up for service. goodnight!

i lay on my green green pastures, looked over the fence and saw the yellow dying sheet of grass.

from the horizons, the hopes for today rises

hey there folks, question why i have been missing for awhile; i was at agraone's chalet yesterday and it was certainly great great fun! although we didnt plan any activities, the get-together alone did make me smile. i have missed these crazy bunch of people, highly inclined in self-entertainment. hahaha! i will upload some photos soon, be patient, be patient.

oh yes, i got back my line already:: ) so that means i am reachable once again. haha, long gone are the days of frustration because you cant reach me and the telepathy lines are either engaged or unavailable. LOL! so once again, carmen is just a phone call away if you ever need a ranting partner<3.

had net today and i thank God for jinguo who taught. cause i was practically half-dead then. okay that is beside the point, the lesson was really good; learning to value each and everyone in the body of Christ. to learn to love the unlovable/difficult to love just as Jesus has loved us. learning to recognise how each person, prominent or otherwise, should be accepted and loved just the same. for every part is vital for the function of the body. i am in the process of learning, and we all should be:: ) and yes, i certainly do love this family i've found in church. and toapayoh net, i lovelove you! (1 corinthians 12:12)

tomorrow, tomorrow is team dream machine's publicity day! and i am getting excited. Lord, i continue to pray that Your hands would be upon the event. you would be with the group and that Your Holy Spirit would be our guide as we speak and bring awareness to the people out there. Lord i pray for blodness and strength to be everyone of us to last the day. through You, Jesus, all things are possible! thank You for you taught me to dream big.
and to you dear dreamers, we can do this altogether. let His love penetrate and glow in and through us. it is by God's grace that we are who we are today, and now let this grace and love overspill.

it is going to be a long long day tomorrow so i had better turned in like, now! ahaha. have got a meeting in school early in the morning then TDM's publicity followed by edge. phew, strength Lord, strength:: ) okay so people, you are loved and most highly valued. goodnight planet earth and all its creatures that speaks.

for it is for a purpose that He has knitted us as one. as He loved, let us learn to love.

joyful, joyful.

have you missed me much. haha! have been a better girl(cause im already a good girl) for the past few days, just so that i can go for agraone's chalet tomorrow:: D haha. daddy cannot read this or he'll know that i have an ulterior motive. whahaha! evil daughter.

remember the interview i mentioned, we got selected:: ) wenjin is super happy(and kanjiong), LOL! yes and so am i and crystal poh. but the interview was super funny, i could sense my dear seniors anxiety. okay, i'd be lying if i said i wasnt panicking. but being carmen, i had all the lame thoughts when they interviewed and i kept giggling to myself. tsk! i wonder where did those thoughts come from, hmm.

actually im still contradicting. honestly, im glad i got in. it isnt something that everyone gets to do. lots of learning opportunities and exposure. yet im worried about the many commitments i have aside of that. im just worried that i'd implicate my seniors if i wouldnt be able to commit. i know that above all else, God still comes first. and of course i hope that this is His plan:: ) i do want to take this seriously and expect a whole adventure out of it. woohoo!



and did i tell you i saw chenxiaowei on monday! it was coincidental. honestly when i looked and saw that it really was her, i was happy! its been some time. talked to her and realised how much i've missed this sweet girl<3.>

i'l worship at Your throne and whisper my own love song. with all my heart i'l sing for you my Dad and King.

my ground of confidence, where i graced

happy father's day:: ) yes, today is father's day and it meant alot to me. not that i am a father myself but because it is a day of which i'd express my love and appreciation to my dad. so much that he has done for me. i know how it isnt easy to bring me up singlehandedly and how it isnt easy to put up with my tantrum sometimes. although he isnt the most terriffic daddy, isnt the most gentle daddy, definitely not one tender loving daddy, i know he loves me just the same.
when he scolds me that is when i know he cares.
when he begins to nag a little that is when i know he is concerned.
when he displays a 'black face' that is when i know he was worrying about me.
when he becomes all unreasonable that is when i know he was getting uptight.
daddy i love you, i really do.

am glad i went to evening service, other then just seeing the other side of pastor rick seaward, it was really a great message. im still laughing at the thought of how pastor shared he'd hide behind the door and scare his wife. so now i see where jeremy got all his 'humorous cells' from. LOL! basically pastor shared about learning to accept everyone.
the colours of the rainbow formed by great diversity
colours so different but put together to display the most incredible sight
yet a rainbow only forms after a shower
only possible under the refraction of the sunlight:: )
a rainbow isnt whole without one of the seven colours
or is only a single colour on its own.
the beauty of each individual colour only shines when placed together
it aint beautiful no more standing on its own
since the other colours isnt there to complement it unique<3.
bearing in mind that each indidvidual is a master piece of the Lord, that through each person God expresses himself.

okayokay people, i have got to turn in now. have got a school interview tomorrow so wish me all the best:: D yes wenjin and crystal, my two very dear seniors. we are going to crash the interview, uh okay i mean do well in the interview<3.

oh and angeline says she miss me miss me miss me<3.

goodnight people. i know how first impression is vital in interviews and so now im off to wipe off my hott pink nails:: X *turns off the lights*

not called to love just a nation we'd choose to, but all continents and also island that stands alone

more than just a wax stick that melts
have been a caveman for the last couple of days. phone-less and internet-less. i almost die-ed. hahaha! oh dear, this little devil has got a problem again! *draws fullstop to complains*

had luch out with huiling, en and cels on tuesday! was really a great get together and we sure yanked quite a bit. haha, those reccess days which im missing sooo dearly. such lovables they are, all ever beautiful ladies i love dearly. haha, though it was a typical student meal at mac, their company sure made a difference. though it wasnt anything much sensible haha, but their presence set a different ambience. so i thank God for them:: ) and huiling, thank you for the card. i almost teared my dear, so sweet of you. its up on my wall reminding me of your sweet love. i love you pretty!

was out with my shar, cel, mich then jing and glad came along. had a long shop at orchard road and it was fun. when the girls hit orchard its a never ending journey. haha! but the miles of walking was sure good exercise and that can be one good excuse to go shopping:: D then i left them for marina bay with celine to meet 4e406! had a really filling dinner and as usual i only started eating after everyone else stopped. hoho, im not a glutton. i only start eating later, its true. thank God for the many fellowship. i have really come to see the many that the Lord has placed in my life and i will learn to treasure and to love. what more could i ask for.

as the candle shone brightly standing in the midst of the darkness, it wasnt placed there just so that the candle could feel good about its own brightness, that it could boast about its flame. the candle was placed there, for in humility and gentleness it could bring light into darkness, hope into desperation. it could show the way out, a guide to the pathway of everlasting light.
though light exposes what is hidden in the dark, it does not judge but accepts unconditionally. but let it not stop here. let one candle pass its flame to another, then to another. let this go on till the entire room gets litted<3.

at the cross i bow my knee, where You blood was shed for me.

mirror the ballerina in the musical box
just to inform, i lost my beloved hand phone and so to get me please use telepathy. i wont say that i am not sad but not very happy either. but i really realise being around the right crowd at the right time is important. was with my LMS project friends; xuan, bao, bre and choomin. they were really encouraging. i liked this that ong xuan said, you blessed the person with your hand phone. hahah! isnt she those that you just want to pinch on the cheek. hahah! thanks you sweetheart. being in the same project group with all of you is indeed a great and fun thing to do. a productive discussion today i would say. and i hereby wish you girls all the best for the rest of your many projects to rush. work hard but not forgetting to play too yah. LOVED BIG!

oh yes and i almost forgot my own too. i have got my assignments and project to do too, rarr! please remind me to do so that i can enjoy the rest of my holidays. its a good break but im quite excited to go back to school already. to meet my classmates and lunch together. thank God for such a class as this; TB28. ever loving and ever lending a helping hand<3.

service last sunday evening was good. Luke Barnett preached about not despising the little or what may seem insignificant in your hands. and i really realise how much i've focused at the big picture that i forgot it comprises of all the tiny pieces of jigsaw. haha. so whatever small pieces God places in my hand, i'd give it my 100%, forgive me for i have not previously done so. yay, so now its making the puzzel whole; flow through this vessel Lord.

okay people, im going to turn in early (though its not very now) remember im loving you:: ) and im going to meet my beloved changhuiling tomorrow and queken too! woohoo, im excited! so i better go turn in or im going to be late tomorrow. haha! but before i end, chenchen xiaowei; if you see this. please know that im missing you much. and loving you big. takecare alot okay<3. hugs you tightly*

thats all dear ones, goodnight!

let this wine bottle fill fewer cups with more wine, than more cups with fewer wine.

through Your glasses, its a whole different story
hey there people. its holidays and thats why i have so much time at hand to blog and blog and blog somemore. slept over at aunty's house and only woke up in the late late afternoon. its been sometime since i slept in:: ) well, im now looking forward to net tonight, we're going to watch shrek 3 at jared's. now the thought of these precious friends of whom i've found in my net really makes me happy. such lovable cratures they are; a little madness and laughter, a little encouragement and prayers, a little support and uplifting. to you my netties, i really hope to see you all grow and become great men and women of God, each and everyone of you. i do love all of you and i really hope i can manifest this love through time and actions with all of you. thank you for all the encouragement you have been to me, the grace that you have shown to me. haha! i know this all sounds mushy but i mean it so, i heart you<3.

You teared from Heaven

as i looked at the globe

stirred up in war and rage

flooded in drowning rivers

lost in the deserts

i look up to the heavens

praying,

send me to where the wars are

put me in the midst of the rage

throw me in the drowning rivers

place me in the deserts

so that i can bring a little peace to this war

bring a little love and forgiveness to this rage

be a little help in the drowning rivers

bring a little faith and hope to the desert

spare them from being the lion's feast

or the victim of the cobra's poison

let not them fall into the fox's black hole

or be caught under the bear's paw

i look up to the Heavens

praying

let me hear Your heartbeat

let mine beat in accordance with it

bring me to Your altar

let me catch Your fire and run with it

let me catch the tears that You shed

let me move with Your compassion

now let me look through Your glasses of love

and see the world so differently

because i loved You, i love you.

i thank God for the love and compassion that He has placed so deep within me and i never want to be numb to it. i could only stand here tall and proud to raise His banner because He has first loved me:: ) life is beautiful and so am i, whoops *laughs cheekily* to you my dear sisters and brothers in Christ, catch His fire and begin to take off, you'll soar and most importantly be that one who stands in the gap. though its sometimes tiring and can be draining at the end of the day it is all worthwhile. and in His strength you can do all things:: ) takecare dear ones. i love you big!


if i could hear my own heartbeat, i hope to hear Yours in mine.

knit me a sweater with threads of love
am at my auntie's house and im having fun. the family with whom i grew up with. 8 years of upbringing by my aunt; her whom i love dearly. 8 years of going wild with my cousins; oh im still loving it. now im sitting here hearing them talk and tease each other by staring at their respective screens. i think only siblings can do that. nownow, there they go again; bickers that are so harmless and in fact entertaining. thats how they turn out so knitted i guess. im just in smiles as im typing this, with such a great warmth and a heart of thanksgiving for such a family that God has placed me in. the homecooked food, the noise that never subsides, the watching teevee together, simply everything, just this family that i adore.
yes, im like running into my holidays. had my last paper today and im like flying sky high; HOLIDAYS! woohoo. dont ask me how i did, i'l prefer to leave that till the end of the hoildays to worry about. for now im going to enjoy every crazy moment of my holidays:: ) so must you people! am looking forward to the ever busy schedule thats lined up for the holidays. 4e4's steamboat, agraone's chalet, meeting up with many people that i've had little time to catch up with. dates, dates and aplenty more of it:: )
got to go people. my cousin is coming on. haha. see thats the one obvious difference when im with my cousin<3.

the bottle need not be perfect, need not be scratch-free. it could still hold abundant love and joy, peace and grace, hope and forgiveness and pour forth to a wine glass, now lets have a drink.

bestowed from above; gifts from Heaven
check out the time! haha, yes. its real 'early' now and im still up studying for my blaw test that is, later. have to be in school at 8 and so i decided to wake up at two earlier on to study. oh yes, thank you ANGELINE! she was the one that woke me up earlier on:: ) yes, i hereby shout out loud that she is soooo sweet, aww! LOL, anyway you must be thinking im nuts, but its just in case i oversleep lah. you know you know, carmen lah. what to expect. hahaha!
am sort of taking a break now and i have so much more to complete. so congratulations to you cause you dont have to worry about long long post:: D sigh, huiling has left for thailand as told by jinguo and im missing her. haha, her and her madness; im falling in love with.
well, it was darren's birthday yesterday yesterday and we went down to surprise him. LOL, maybe not so much of a surprise. the moment we were there, the only words that he said was 'i know, i know' super cute lah. hahaha! but am really glad to see him again after a long long's time. darrenng, happy 17th birthday! i remember your birthday okay. haha, somehow things arent quite the same without your funny faces and random jokes. its life minus alot of fun and laughter now. but still, take care my brother you are much missed, very much loved by me:: ) catch up soooon! God bless.
oh yes, and how can i forget, today, officially is chenjinguo's birthday! heyyouheyyou, happy 19th birthday big guy. thank you for being so much of a left hand. have i told you the significance of a left hand; it is a support to the right and the right is inevitable without the left. thank you for all the encouragement you have been to me. really am thanking God for you dude! take care aplenty and have great fun at uhm, national library? LOL, all the best in all and keep growing in God<3.
*back to the books, yawns*

from where do i begin to tell You, how much i thank You for these precious gifts You bestowed with a touch of love.

hands that speak the language of love
before i could move on i have to testify of God's miracle. woohoo, so excited, so so excited! my internet was down since the day before and i dont know why. it seems to be some big problem cause i can even detect my modem though its plugged in. but i decided to try again today. to cut the long story short, initially couldnt and then i prayed and suddenly it came on! woohoo, now tell me what a great God i serve:: D haha, so now i dont have to worry about having to call the starhub guy. oh and another one, i left my keys with celine last night and i thought i lost it. i was panicking at my door and didnt know how was i going to tell my daddy about it. then, guess what. he coincidentally was going out to buy some things and so i managed to get into the house; real close man. so much i have to thank God for:: ) for He is good and His love endures forever<3.
had our very first team dream machine gathering today and i was really excited (dont ask me why, i dont have the answers either) i just thank God for the opportunity to be His hands and feets in serving the community. and we are beginning to see Him coming through for us, so much to thank God for. initially things didnt work out too well but it seems like now we are getting better and all glory goes to God. am so looking forward to the launch on the 30th. its giving up my saturday day-outs but taking on something God-breathed which i think is something worth. but still i pray for time expansion, always something that i struggle with. but i have to admit that is me that has bad time management, whoops:: / so if you past the library and see the dummy guide for better time management, think of me<3.

write You a love poem, sing You a love song; sweetsweet love i've found in You