...

a year's worth of memories
2/26/2006

it was still the same page this morning when i went to visit the d-x website. but after about half an hour later, just as i was starting on my eltech, there was this sms on my phone. from stonnie it says "Diary-x cant recover the past entries.."

i was in shock for that one moment. i was hoping it was just another prank of jx's to make me entertain her because she's bored. but no, it wasnt. they are really gone. two years' worth of entries... g o n e . i think i'll download my entries even if there's a backup for before dec'04 entries. the memories that i really want are those in 2005.

argh. you know what, the only reason i can give you as to why i want back my '05 entries is that i know i have alot of happy memories that year. but i cant remember most of it. that's why i badly need them back. lost memories... guess they will be gone forever unless someone talks to me about it and help me recall. i'm not being drama right now really. i cant remember. the only thing i can remember is probably those Superstar chasing stuff.

d-x will be up and running once again at the end of march. i'm not sure if i'm going to return there. i lost faith in it after this fucking massive drive failure shit. you know how i always preferred d-x to blogspot no matter how many people told and tried to prove to me that blogspot is so much better? in fact, whenever i encourage people to start up their own blogs, i recommend diary-x. cause it gives the right amount of privacy and each entry can be password protected.

fuck. that stupid open letter was really not needed. i'd rather he took off with the donations and explainations so i can give myself more reasons to hate him. i really hate the host for letting such a thing happen. i hate myself more for not downloading my past journal entries.

it was like one trusted buddy. and now i'm told he's murdered.

die, bitch. ;

tag... you're it!
2/24/2006

10 random thoughts.

1. i'm fat.
2. exams - when are they ever going to end?
3. scandals, scandals scandals.
4. dbsk! ~~~ <3
5. hmmm... i think my mom still owes me money. loads of it.
6. to go or not to go to Chanel's performance?
7. i like Le Bin and Qing Ling to be together. they're soooo cute. haha
8. i need new clothes and a haircut pleaseee!
9. how to handle ISSM and ELTECH? dammmn.
10. counting down to holidays. whee!

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1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, and find line 4.
"For example, a potential difference of 6 volt [V] ..."

2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can.
The Sims Makin' Magic expansion pack cd

3. What is the last thing you watched on TV?
律政新人王，the 9pm show on channel 8. i like Le Bin and Qing Ling!

4. Without looking, guess what time it is:
10:30pm

5. Now look at the clock. What is the actual time?
10:40pm

6. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
the tv going on in the living room, noises made from the washing of dishes in the kitchen

7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
earlier on this afternoon. was at school taking my maths exam paper.

8. Before you started this survey, what did you look at?
deviantart.

9. What are you wearing?
my sec3 camp tee and a pair of Popeye shorts

10. Did you dream last night?
i did. i dreamt of my ambience friends. they abandoned me. they didnt ask me to go for the sleepover at someone's place. and i had to climb chimneys and ventilation vents to find them.

11. When did you last laugh?
around 40 minutes ago, when i was watching DBSK on dongbang theatre, performing a play.

12. What is on the walls of the room you are in?
the cuckoo clock and the aircon

13. Seen anything weird lately?
not really.

14. What do you think of this quiz?
interesting random questions

15. What is the last film you saw?
Memoirs of a Geisha (and before that, 小孩不笨2)

16. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy?
build a condo for all my close ones, a Jeep, loads of new clothes and a tour package for around-the-world trip. hmm, i'll top it up with a reciept from some charitable organisation. :)

17. Tell me something about you that I don't know.
i might be a tomboy, but there are times when i can be girly. HAHA

18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
let there be no schools and there's no need for studying! and let poverty be history as well. XD

19. Do you like to dance?
i would like to dance. i love to watch dances.

20. George Bush:
omg. this question would get me into a whole lot of trouble if i answer it. SKIP!

21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?
Melanie - dont ask me why i want this name. it was the first name i thought of when i saw this question.

22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?
Abraxas - is Malfoy's grandad's name. got this when reading HBP last night. i think it sounds cool.

23. Would you ever consider living abroad?
i did, on several occasions. too many restrictions here.

24. What do you want God to say to you when you reach the pearly gates?
"You've been so good. so, step right up into heaven!" but of course, i hope that happens when i die from old age, not those diseases or illness.

25. 4 people who must also do this meme in THEIR journal:
anybody man. i'm lazy to name.

die, bitch. ;

... i'm still waiting for the day i'll shift back to d-x. my blog #1 has been down for i-dont-know-how-many days already. for those who dont know, this is (most likely) my temporary blog only. anyway, am feeling alittle gloomy. i was reading the "Massive Drive Failure FAQ" and there was this part:

16. What happens if the drive can't be recovered?
In that unfortunate event, several things would happen. Most importantly, everyone who donated to the recovery effort would have the option of having their donation refunded in full. We would then restore from the backup from December 2004 and go on from there.

omg... -mental scream- when i saw that, i felt like stabbing myself to death. one year's entries will be GONE. i hate the host suddenly. i hate myself even more. when the host was reporting that there would be problems, i didnt take actions (i.e. to download my journal). now, it's gone. it's probably gone forever. i think if that happens, i'll download my remaining entries and start ALL OVER here. dang. though those arent very happy entries, but they are my memories afterall.

-

last night i was chatting with tabs. then i suddenly told her i wanted to give her a treat before she goes overseas. i almost made her cry can. lol. how useless is she?

but anyway, i'm quite useless. i cried while putting myself in other people's shoes. fel says it isnt wrong of me to do that. it's a way of expressing myself. :)

-

after many days of revising RE, i'm bloody done with the retest. and i passed! :thumbsup: wheeee~ tomorrow, or rather later this afternoon, starts the first paper for my exams. counting down to the day i finish my tphm. that will be 7 days! hmm..

i hope to get all these over and done with. i think... these few days will seem rather slow. so i'm really looking forward to friday. i want to go out with all of them, take loads of photos and keep them for rememberance. afterall, after this, we wont be 2a06 anymore.

BAH! engmaths is bloody difficult for the first time in my whole poly life. i cant do probability. it's crazy shit i tell you. i planned to stay till 2:30am (at least) to revise my maths. but i didnt nap earlier on. and now, i'm worn out before 1am. wanna sleeeeeeeep... zzz... NO! CANNOT! i musnt sleep. i'm aiming for B. i must sort out that probability before test. ooosh~

good luck to all taking the exams! :D

die, bitch. ;

it's so sweeeeeet. NOT.
2/21/2006

practical lab test was quite screwed. charles ong made me damn stressful during the whole NaOH experiment. but thankfully, he's a 2nd-chance kinda person. so i got 7 marks (outta 10 i think). but the calculations and theory part sucked. oh, and so was the compressor/pump experiment too.

scaled my arm at a sucky japanese place-to-eat. my forearm pressed against the metal. fucking hot. besides, the food and service werent even that good come to think of it. and if my eyes werent playing tricks on me, i saw a puny little cockroach crawling around. if you think a baby roach is nothing. wait till it grows into full-size. and then it'll start reproducing like nobody's business. yuck!

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was watching Campus Superstar on channel U just now. haha, my hotpicks are into the semi-finals man. wooohoo! they're great. felt happy for them. i'm not chasing them however. its just that one of them happens to be a friend's friend. all the best. ;)

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Prepare for some surprises that may be coming your way. This sounds like a contradiction, but it's not -- really. Just make sure to stay alert, and that way you can take advantage of every new opportunity that arises.

that's what my horoscope says. it's 90% accurate and i cant believe how true it is. spotted this scandal online. wanted to share it so much with the rest of them but i mean, it's so late. who would come online this instant? but seriously, i dont know how to react. there's this scream going on on the inside of my head. it's all true; a two-way thing to be exact. very much confirmed, i'm sure. the thing is, how can they actually think i'm blind?! i'm ultra sensitive to this kinda stuff alright?

oh hell... i'm so bad at adapting. zzz is this what they call 'the honeymoon period'? even seeing can get me diabetes, i'm afraid. ok, so maybe experiencing it firsthand might be a different thing. but hey, this is not the sour grapes thing. dont worry, because i have at least 6 years' worth of 单恋 experience and i've gotten so used to it that it doesnt hurt as much as it was in the beginning.

die, bitch. ;

taitais to fel's place
2/19/2006

thanks to minghui for giving me a 'crash course' on ISSM before the start of our paper. if not for him, i wouldnt have managed to cram all that shit in my brain and get a pass for that 15%. peishan and minghui both came complaining to me saying that i didnt discipline somebody and now she's off running into other people's turf. lol. oh my, i'm so sorry.

after classes, we went down to Ikea to buy our hotdogs + drinks (for we are the cheapo fools). and after that we went to fel's house. but just before that, she took us to block with 40 storeys. we took the express lift up to the top. the view is.. WOW. it's damn nice. it's like google earth. and the seaview is great! fel lives on the 26th storey. it's a 14 storey difference, but still the view is amazing. seeing fel's room makes me wanna have my own room too. so i can decorate it my way since it's my space.

before we ate our kfc, we were in her room reading my blog and viewing this photo clip that fel made for us taitais. the music used, the captions, the colour and effects made me teared man. it's like how touching. if i see the completed version, i'll probably cry. oh god. sorry i'm sucha crybaby. i can be so easily touched.

and then we played mahjong in her room. it's damn hell funny lar. halfway through, claudine's clumsy hands caused the '三万' to roll all the way inside under fel's bed. there was a big commotion as everyone tried to get the tile. a rescue plan was launched. after so many tries (and photo shots), they finally retrieved it. you should hear the funny stuff we say when trying to retrieve it.

me: i cant see. direct me to it.
tabs: move down somemore!

O_O lol. we can be alittle misleading at times. hahaha. ok. then we watched Victoria's Secret Fashion Show on fel's lappy. the models are wonder women man. they all have the same things in common:
1) flat tummies
2) they are busty
3) have long hair
4) full of self-confidence
5) award-winning smile

the air blowing in their face plays a damn important part also. omg, they are like sooooo hot. and you know, they are the real professionals. there was this model whose stiletto got stuck in the runway suddenly. in that split second, she reacted to the situation by taking her shoe off and walk like nothing's happened. how did she do it?! if it was me, i'll probably just stone there, shocked.

we read through some bitch's blog (someone's current's ex). she's such an attention seeker trying to be emo. she's got lots of those very cliche kinda quotes and expressions. oh please. GET OVER HIM YOU BITCH. pestering wont get you nowhere. you're behaving more like a stalker.

while fel sent ying off, tabs and claud got cosy in fel's bed. so i offered to help them take their 'makeout' photos. haha. after that, we all left. fel sent me to the bus stop. she was so nice that she offered to wait for my 970 to come. but halfway, i saw my sis at the bus stop and realise that my dad was coming to pick her up. so fel waited for nothing. sorry dudette. :/

-

we taitais still have alot of things we havent do.

1) go to clementi and try all the good food.
2) go overseas together
3) go to each other's place for house visiting

think there's still awhole lot more that's in this list. but i cant recall.

-

lately, i'm into this korean boyband called Dong Bang Shin Ki (aka DBSK, DBSG, or TVXQ). i know i used to say things like "i cant understand why there are people who are so into kpop or jpop when they cant even understand their language."

now i know. but i'm attracted to this group because it's PENNY's fault. she was telling me this boyband can dance. and i'm very into watching dances. so she showed me those clips and damn, i'm addicted to them. their fast songs are catchy, and their slow songs are really nice. everytime i am damn stressed up from all the report writing, cheonging of presentations, i'll open up all their Rising Sun clips to destress.

just now, penny and i were discussing about them like mad fans. xiah is so cute, changmin also cute, uknow's dance is pro, hero is so coool and micky is just so... ugly. >_< i'm sorry! but i really dont like him. though he's got a rather good voice though. i think we're alittle mad. we're even thinking of buying their album online. wooo. hahahah i cant believe i'm into them. wow.

die, bitch. ;

fuckoff, petty bitch
2/18/2006

i should be studying my ISSM now. but god, all that calculations and drawing graph is not needed. hey, i thought that was supposed to be Safety Management or something. how come there's breakeven point, variable costs, fixed costs and all? that sounds more like POA man.

anyway, there was this huge argument over the payment for the chalet yesterday during ISSM lecture. i can never understand why the $5 should be an individual thing. i mean, it's so clear that the $5 is for the class outing. since you werent there, let me tell you that our dr geng came on the second night (the bbq, dumbfuck) just so we can claim the funds (she said this herself). and if you didnt attend the bbq, fucking too bad for you. already you are paying so little, you still wanna reduce your cost and add it on to ours?

ok, yar. a difference of only $1.50 to us. i know that's not alot. friends from ambience will think i'm giam. it's NOT. look who's the real giam siap guis lar. originally $6 still want to try means and ways to bring it down to $2. i think this is more of a principle than monetary matters.

and claudine was so nice as to go over and try to explain to you how the payment is gonna be. -applause- we've already let you have it your way. so why are you giving that frown that i can see 100 metres away? and right, if you have the guts, come out and argue with me face to face lar! dont sit there and act big just because you have ronnie to back you up, you prat. i'll be ever ready to take you on. word of caution, i've already prepared my script.

oh, and if you're still bearing past grudges. go reflect on yourself. nobody kicked you out. you caused your own disaster. be alittle more real when you act lar. nobody's gonna believe you when you go round saying stuff like "i dont know how to do leh. how ar?" when your test papers are like full marks? and besides, have backbone lar please. leave that little bit of dignity for yourself. if you are on bad terms with somebody, dont leech from that person. it's like the most basic principle of respect.

i should have said something when you made a big fuss in the LT yesterday. well, maybe i'm just like what your name suggests, petty. haha. oh god, did you catch that? i just made fun of you. ;D

hmmm, come to think of it, why am i so slow in reacting these days... i didnt even catch jinquan scolding joohuang fuckoff. wow. action and drama in 2a06. it's gonna be the last anyway. today's the last day of school and after this, we'll all go seperate ways. kinda sad that i have to part with my fellow classmates. though there are some that i can never learn to tolerate.

die, bitch. ;

le bee-yeff
2/13/2006

i used to think i was very good at acting, eversince young. today really let me realise i wasnt really cut out for acting. cause' ar, today sam (tab's sis) came to NP for her direct admission thingy. when tab called me, sam took over the phone begging for help. say got this colleague from her starbucks tagging her for the DAE. ask me to go down give him the wrong idea. seeing that my presentation was postphoned to 4pm, i went down to the convention centre to look for them.

initial plan was to pretend to be her 'significant other' lar. wanted to act cool and bluff my way through. what better way to threaten the enemy than to give that 'killer' look? unfortunately, cover was blown when tabs was there. i didnt realise that guy was there already. oh, so anyway. after tab left, there was a moment of awkwardness. i didnt know how to be in that situation. and it took me awhile to realise that sam was carrying something. i quickly snatched her shoebag over and rolled my eyes when the guy wasnt looking. lol.

aiya. the whole thing was screwed lar. i didnt look like a bee-yeff can. i didnt even know if the guy was scared off by me. i made myself look like someone who was trying so hard to chase her. FAILED. maybe a sequel to this. maybe the next episode would be that i'm 'already' it. i've had the whole thing scripted out. shouldnt have any problems this time round. HAHAHA. wth...

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after that, i had my tphm presentation. Ms Min was most kind. she didnt let me present infront of 2a04. she even let me be the last to go. and she only made me answer one question. :)

today starts the last week of school. it seems like i've cleared quite alot of projects and stuff yet there's still loads more. feeling alittle tired already. last night, i was ranking the locations for my attachment. i doubt if i really can pass. RE is tough, Eltech is tough, everything's tough. but i really wanna go for attachment. i really need the money.

die, bitch. ;