I lost it

*Bitterness*

I know I have not been there when you needed me most,
I know I did not try hard enough,
But just when i started to show you how much i care,
I realized that you have already drifted away, very far indeed,
Is it too late to save or revive anything?
*Sigh*

Miss Fitz

I'm so diggin this version of Toxic!!

Mine mine mine!!!! ^.^

Blueberry incident

Believe it or not... Since the day I was born... August 2009 was the first time I tasted fresh blueberries. The only ones I've tasted were canned ones used for blueberry cakes back home... It just didnt appeal to me until my flatmate persuaded me to get a box at Tesco's.

Experience:
As I was happily munching away...
*Monologue*
Hrm... doesnt taste that bad.... why have I never thought of trying it? hmmm... proud of myself....

As I was finishing the last 3.... i turned a blueberry over and guess what...

The friggin worm was still wiggling... and I was watching it dig into the blueberrry.... so revolting im never gonna buy blueberries from tesco's anymore.... ewwww~~

Isnt she cute!!

She's only four!!!!~ awww... ain't she adorable!!! hehehe.... wut a cili padi!

Mimioui

Mimioui Necklace White Gold

I found it I found it I found it!!!!! I finally found a look-alike!! I've been searching for this design since last year...... Finally found my love as I was browsing through the Dior website...So extravagant.... GBP 600... *Glittering eyes* love such simplicity!~

Details:

• 0,045 carat brilliant cut diamond
• Adjustable length
• Gold weight: 260 g

Someday, I will buy this with my very own hard-earned money~~ ^.^

Comeback of the sways

I'm so happyyy!!! Hehehe.. i got to talk to daddy today.... and I got the green light to go to Perth!! ***claps claps*** Few weeks ago, Sam n I thought that i wouldn't even to make it out of the borders of home... see baby! God works wonders!! hehehe..... tsk tsk.. I had a condition... is that he becomes my dancing partner *evil grin* are you ready sweetheart?? Though I'm all rusty... but....who cares! Boy oh boyy im super excited!!

Rambles

Lately I've been addicted to youtube..... the make-up gurus are... creative!!~ I soo wanna buy everything they use... but it appears that the array of eyeshadow colours they have are beyond normal.. haha.... would b very expensive if i were to purchase em all *gulps*... and as usual i've been procastinating my work!!! i have to buck up!! running out of time!!!

Love's a game of give and take

But mama said you can't hurry love
No, you'll just have to wait
She said love don't come easy
It's a game of give and take
I can't hurry love, no, you'll just have to wait
Just trust, give it time
No matter how long it takes

I feel the same way too

It was our anniversary. On that very day, I was so caught up with my own problems n feelings that I totally lost track of the time. Since he went back to his normal life in Perth, I suddenly felt the distance. Magnified. Of course we have our ups and downs. And at this very moment we're striving to get past the down curve in this journey together. As long as we stop picking on each others fault and so I thought. Wrong.

In life, we often find ourselves confronted with things that we try hardest to avoid. And so we've been avoiding the topic for as long as we can. The time is drawing closer and there's no other choice but to talk about it. While I wish that I can spend my every single day being with him, I realize that I have only one shot in life to start my career in the UK. Sometimes I suffocate from being too logical. I feel that there are many things that are beyond my control. And hence to get a better control means trying my best to achieve the most of what I'm capable of.

Nevertheless, trying to take control means losing control. Its like a double-edged sword. I take control of my career yet I may lose control in the relationship. He has his point. We may not be able to talk the long hours, webcam whenever we want or see each other for 1 whole year. We may not be as involved as we are in each others' lives..... But I have faith.... I have faith that if it is meant to be, it will be for the better..... As much as I'm determined to stay, I find it quite overwhelming myself. I have to start my life all over again in a place where I don't really have friends. ALONE. It's gonna be my 4th time doing that in my life. And now I may not be given a choice to go back home or to go visit him before I start my war. =( I'm tired.. tired of being independent. I just wanna be with him.

P/s: And he blew me away again with his self-composed song as an anniversary surprise. Its as beautiful as his soul.

B-A-N-A-N-A-S!!

This post will be very random. And so I was thinking on one fine day....
Why must bananas turn so ugly after a few days??
Whyy????

Looks as if it has skin disease. I know I know..because its perishable... but why cant it be like an apple? the inside starts to rot before the skin..... Hrm... I was surfing n I saw dis fabulous invention!

Beautiful n colourful banana cases! Gives u more appetite before u open the case... n it prevents ur banana from getting all squashed in ur bag! Now you can carry ur bananas around with style!

I can't pour my ketchup out! Tell me whyyy... ain't nothing but a heartache... lol... WHY???

Hush Hush- PCD

Dumbfounded

The only thing that never cease to change is indeed change itself. I found this entry dating back to January 2004:

Maybe our mistakes are what make our fate...
Without them, what would shape our lives?
Perhaps if we never veered off course....
We wouldn't fall in love or have disputes or be who we are...
After all, seasons change...
So do cities..
People come into your life and people go...
But its comforting to know the ones you love are always in your heart...
And if you're very lucky, they'll return to you....

Of course there are times where I feel that my life is perfect. Everything is as planned. Yet, many a time I suddenly feel empty and lost. For e.g. I used to think that my clubber frens are not good influences. But then as I age, I found myself enjoying the night life. Until I met A, who used to think the way I did before my perceptions changed. I stopped but then only to find out that not long after that, A enter clubs too. I should be happy.....shouldn't I?

As I write this entry... my mind tells me "Yes I should be happy because now I don't have to feel bad!" but my heart on the contrary is of the opposite. I changed for the better and so I thought. I don't particularly like clubbing anymore. I felt as if I was put into many situations of shame (just because I enjoy dancing with my girlies) all for nothing.

My plans within the last 2 years was to finish my Bachelor Degree, my Masters Degree, and then to work in the UK. To live a life of my own. To discover my limits and of course my capabilities. To achieve the most that I can to give my parents a good life. However, my plans have changed. I was told the many reasons to not live according to my plans (not to be selfish). And so I have given up on them, ignoring the lil desire deep within me.

I'm afraid. Afraid that in few years down the road I find myself in the exact situation feeling empty, confused, and lost. Will all the speech of being considerate change with time? Will I find myself staring back at my past and regretting my decisions to ignore that desire deep within? What if what if..... Up til this very day, I still regret the many decisions I've made in the past. I don't wanna regret anymore. Sorry for all the rambling. I dont know if any of this makes sense.

Oh please dress me up!

Temporarily addicted to this song! Lady Gaga pronounces the designer names so sexily..
oOh la laa~~~

Tsk tsk... I'm so excited! 2moro will b d day where muh taste buds meet F Cup Cookie!!

A trip to Birmingham

Went for a short trip to Birmingham for my mango pie's convocation.... I'm honoured to b invited.... n I'm very proud of her! I was juggling between the roles of a photographer, a make-up artist, and of course an apple struddle~~ ^.^

and... as usual I couldn't resist the beauty of flowers... ^.^

we also went for a movie...Harry Potter's release of the Half-Blood Prince....

The first 10 mins of the movie was 3D (that explains d goggle-like glasses)...Its similar to those helicopter or car-like rides u find in theme parks where u feel as if ur IN the movie... flying in the air... or being on a really bumpy ride... that kinda thing.... but because there were other 3D adverts so the images suddenly appeared up front..... Was a bit dizzy coz I couldn't find my focus point... images were practically all over the place... haha.... and the movie was kinda disappointing...

Rusty

P says:
u say sekejap ur happy feel hangus mah
P says:
wao... i rmb the word hangus.. i m so impressed of myself...
S says:
pls la hangus not ngam in this sentence
S says:
hilang ba

This is the best that we can do after graduating from high school!! Haha...

His favourite song

A song which brings back a lot of beautiful memories.....



Love you baby...

F Cup Cookie

I was rolling on my bed for what seemed like hours.. wasnt me to have difficulties falling asleep.. =/
I had another weird dream... i dreamt of a gigantic worm looking for its egg.... and my 'friend' in dat dream took it n peeled of its shell... it was like a hard-boiled egg... lol.. and we were being chased by people who wanted us 2 b villians like them..... and somehow at some point i was invisible but then i got caught when my powers became weak.....hrm...... anyway... weird weird weird!!!

Anyway.. I'm sure many of u have heard about this F Cup Cookie fad from Japan. Supposedly it will increase ur bust size by half n inch or slightly more... low in calories n it doesnt make u put on any weight.. however, we are only advised to consume 2 a day 2 weeks before ur period... dis biscuit apparently contains natural ingredients which would increase ur female hormones.... I can't wait to try it!

Elavator - PCD

I find that PCD's new songs relate to many of our relationships these days...

If we could stop fightin' each other
Long enough for us to see that
That we are stronger together, than separate
Babe you gotta believe that,
But you love me today, don't want me 'round tomorrow
Everytime you change your mind, I follow
Caught up, fall up in your maze and I'm so dizzy babe
Can't keep goin' back and forth on these waves
I'm gettin' sea sick

Like the way we were before
And I wanna know if we can go
Back to the days when we was close
Cuz sometimes I think I'm solo
Think you don't want me no more
And I gotta get up off this seesaw
We're like an elevator

We go up and we go down, down, down
Like an elevator
We touch the sky and touch the ground, ground, ground
Like an elevator
You stuck on 1, while I'm pressin 3
Then we get up on the 4th floor, but then we disagree
And you keep on blamin' me
But I wish that you would see
That I'm just tryna elevate ya like an elevator

Take you higher,
That I'm just tryna elevate ya like an elevator
Take you higher,
That I'm just tryna elevate ya like an elevator

And I feel, like we speakin’ two different languages
It's hard to read ya,
But I know, if you at least try to make it half way
I swear that I'll meet ya, meet ya, meet ya
But we can't have a conversation without beefin'
Yellin' back and forth for no good reason
I won't let you leave and you keep askin' me to stay
One of us better figure out what we want
Cuz I'm gettin' a headache

Oh if there's any man who understand what I'm sayin'
Won't you help me say yeah (yeah), yeah (yeah), yeah (yeah)
Oh there gotta be some women who feelin' the way I'm feelin'
Say yeah (yeah), yeah (yeah), yeah
I'll take the blame if it'll make this go stop
I'll hope for you if we can make it to the top
But we gotta find a way to break down these walls baby
I'm waitin' on you, stop waitin' on me, damn this elevator

He was going to marry her

I have always had weird dreams. Vomitting snakes. Being chased by gigantic octopuses. Dancing with king kongs, etc. Last night... I dreamt that he dumped me for my best fren (sum random stranger). And I had to be with her ex somehow for what reason I dont know. He dumped me n he was gonna marry her! It was so real i could feel grief, regret, and anger *Sigh*.....I wish that will never happen.... is this some kind of sign?? =((( NOOOOOoooooo....

Updates

I just got back from London today. Day trip just to meet up n bond with my cousin whom I've not seen for 2-3 years now. Daphne (Olie's bff since primary sch) and her bf Richard was there too! From Newcastle, they went all the way down to London to spend a few days with her too! Hrm... I didn't buy or do much. Oh! I bought something for him. Hehe.... Hopefully this time it will be of use ^.^ *fingers crossed*

Just to backtrack a bit, went to Birmingham last Monday to look for a suitable 1 yr anniversary gift for him (Our anniversary's end if this month! yeay!!). Haha.... unfortunately didnt get ALL d things that i had in mind....the important things weren't there anymore *Sighhh*

Oh! I bought a new O2 simcard called O2 Your Country. Got it coz I could not send or receive any text msgs n the charges were quite pricey. Well... d good news is.... that I get 200 friggin free minutes for international calls whenever i top up 30 pounds! n i get to fish for the duck (surprises) and i got free texts and 50% discount on all calls made to any UK lines (tho only for a couple of days!).. Hurraaayy!!! Never been happier! Now I can call him whenever I can... ^.^ Hahaha!

Wo-Man

Good morning~

Hehe... finally after 3 consecutive nights of nightmares, I slept well last night. Should've slept a little longer though.. Haha... ^.^ A good way to start the day for me is and will always be:

Receiving a call from my sweetheart, listening to his gentle tone and his laughters. How I wish to end this long distance relationship!! haha.. Don't get me wrong! I just wish we could stay in the same place. Reminds me of a movie that we watched together in Perth, Kate and Leopold! A must watch!!

Lately I've been obsessed with this Korean drama called We Got Married. Its an online reality show where d korean celebrities are paired up together as a married couple (artificial couple). Apart from their routine like other newlyweds, cleaning up, cooking, etc., the couples are given missions each week. E.g. making kimchi, doing sports together, etc. I feel that some of them have really developed feelings for one another during the shows coz of the surprises, and the things they do for one another.... *Sighs of happiness* I wanna get married and live happily like that too.... hehe... ^.^ Watch it on : http://www.mysoju.com/we-got-married/

However, theres this one girl who divorced her husband because all he does is laze, eat, sleep, and doesn't understand her at all....

"Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater. If you give her sperm, she will give you a baby. If you give her a house, she'll give you a home. If you give her groceries, she will give you a meal. If you give her a smile, she will give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her. So if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of shit."

This is from an email i received today. Guys, better treat ur girls right! Lots of love, A

A bad day

I understand that everyone of us have different personalities due to different upbringing, environment, etc. But shouldn't everyone who finished primary school at least understand the meaning of manners? I feel very uncomfortable whenever u think u own whatever I own. My willingness to share certain things with you does not give u the authority to make any decisions for me or to do whatever u want with my things (unless told). I would really appreciate some courtesy to ask me.. n NOT tell me what you have already decided to do with it.

Hrm... Today's not a very good day. I feel that some things in my life aren't as perfect as I thought it was. Obviously I failed to get the message across. Suddenly I find myself floating through the clouds of doubt. What is real, and what is not? What has the world done to change such a beautiful soul? perhaps, what have I done to it?

The Transsexual

Ohh I love Amy! She's so humorous! Notice both Shan & Rozz's reactions.. haha

"Nolah what do you think.. Go market chop fish head"

Haha.. Hilarious!

Born to be friends

Dear PAS(S),

Mei I regret I didn't spend more time with you. To be honest, I had the same questions at the back of my head. "Will anyone of us have anything to say? Will it be awkward? How will it be? What if she keeps quiet and say nothing at all? I wanna hug her, but will she think that we're not close enough to have body contact?"

Perhaps both of us were too afraid to see that any one of us have changed? or maybe it was only me? To be honest I miss those PASS times too. Just like you and dra, I wish I spent more time with you girls. My biggest regret. I know I was the one who put least effort into our friendships but yet both of you still have me in your hearts. It means so much to me, so much that I don't think any of you will understand. Thank you very much for not judging me like the world. I know mei that we may not have been the closest in PASS, in a sense that I don't rili speak my heart out, my problems, but I do know that we have a strong bond. I know that ur the one who will not cease to believe me even if the world turns against me. Somehow I'm very protective of you.

I'm sorry dra for being the picker, for complaining and for being so ignorant during our last years. I was so wrapped up with my uncountable problems during that time that all I saw was negativity. I'm very sorry for being such a lil girl back then who mistreated you at times. I still clearly remember our stayovers, and us getting ready before our part time work at Tg. Aru beach hotel. I miss those times too. I'm glad that til' now we still talk and share our thoughts. I really appreciate the fact that both of you have made so much effort to meet me. Dra in London and Mei in KK. Very very grateful my dears. As for our missing S, all i can say is that i wish she's living a good life wherever she may be. If I could turn back time, I would change many things. But here we are, as old as ever! All there is to do, is appreciate and cherish the times we have left in dis world... lol...haha....lots of love.

P/S: The keychain engraved with "Born to be friends" (and our young faces on it.. haha)meant and still means the world to me.Love you both.

Grumbles grumbles

Its getting warmer these days and I wouldn't survive with my windows shut. The stupid birds! *flaps flaps n a big loud thud* I see one standing on my window pane trying to go through the wide-enough-for-it to enter window gap. My heart races everytime i try to close the windows before they squeeze theirselves through. You silly pigeons & magpies! STAY AWAY FROM MY WINDOW!!

Ewww

I read about piles (haemorrhoids) last night. I've heard a lot bout it from my mum since she regularly meet clients with health problems. If you don't know what it is, it is like an excess fleshy lump that you can feel inside or on the outside of your anus (see the picture above). You know you have it when you...

1. feel it at your backside (when showering or for whatever reason you're touching it)
   
2. bleed when passing motion (bright red but not like period blood okay)
3. find it itchy underneath
4. see soiling on your underwear

.

Out of curiosity I googled it. Boy it's disgusting and ugly.
(The one on the right looks more like a mole to me.. haha)

Ways to treat:

1. Surgery (I heard they stick something into your anus...ewww)
   
2. Prescribed cream (may not work for everyone)
   
3. Maintain high-fibre meals

I realized that I hardly take fibre (apart from the organic drink that i take seasonally..haha!). To be honest, there was a period of time where I bled almost everytime I passed motion. I recall mum saying that her client's piles (which were as big as grapes) dropped of after she went on organic fasting for a few weeks. And so that is what I'm going to do. Whether or not I have it I'll still fast coz I wouldn't wanna have the ugly stuff anywhere near my anus. And so i went to Tesco's just now and bought these...

.
Pak Choi, Bran cereals, Baked beans, Pears, Apples, Heart sth lettuce / cabbage (i dont remember), broccoli, and bananas...

muh plan:

1. Drink organic as frequently as possible (every 2-3 hours)
2. Eat fruits / cereal / boiled vegies when i feel hungry
3. Drink lots of water

Perhaps I should ask mum to send me a few more bottles. The big question is...
Can I resist the temptation of the tidbits?? Hrm...We'll see... ^.^

Nothing beats H.O.M.E

My trip back to KK was a very short one. Two days before I departed, I met Baby Amanda Jane, Jacinta, Mei (Sharon) and Andy at Pizza Hut. It was a long time since i saw Mei & Andy.

.
"The music may stop now and then, but the strings remain forever.." -Yuslina

Friends come and friends go, but some remain in our lives forever. Though we live different lives now, and may not have much to say, sometimes you just know deep down that they are the ones that you can trust and rely on for life....

(Tsk tskk... don't they both look adorable together? =D )

No matter how happy we are to have known Baby Amanda, nothing can be compared to the glint of happiness in Jacinta's eyes..... Different from before, she now exudes an aura of strength and happiness. Its as if she found a new meaning to life.....

(Stolen from Sharon)

Let's move on to my family and his. Grandma was in KK for a couple of days. She looks healthy. Everybody else is pretty much the same. Oh my bro's muscles are starting to form (after all the hard work at gym!).

And Uncle's surprise birthday dinner at Grazie!!

Did not really get to spend time with uncle and aunty this trip because they had work to attend to at Tawau. Nevertheless, I'm very happy that our families are getting along nicely! ^.^ God's blessing.

Let it free

When we're in love, we may unconsciously become someone else. Someone we don't wanna be. Why should there be jealousy when our other half hangs out with someone of the opposite sex who have been their bffs way before we stepped into their lives? Why do we get upset when he goes out at night while we stay at home? Since when does a phone conversation with the opposite sex become a crime? Since when did love become something so jealous, so impatient, so controlling, so....... scary? Sometimes we cannot help feeling how we feel... for...

"The heart has reasons that reason cannot know"
- Pascal

I'm pretty sure that most of us if not all during the crush or falling in love period used to be very cool and understanding. Both guys and girl alright. We girls can wear super low cut tops or micro minis, he will give u thumbs up for being sexy. He can hang out with his bff (be it a male or female) anytime, anywhere, even clubs. So why take his/her freedom away when the relationship has begun? Shouldn't we trust that whatever he/she decides to do, they will not do anything to hurt us? (If they do sth rili wrong than perhaps they dont deserve you).

The more you can't get hold of something, the more you desire. It's just like ur mum asking the lil you not to eat sweets but then u still do when she's not around. If he / she really loves you, they will one day willingly stop. You wouldn't wanna know that ur gf has been out clubbing last night when you THOUGHT you put her to bed at 8 right?

I guess that's pretty much why I've heard many of my girlfriends say "the best part of a relationship is during courtship, before the start of arelationship." Where have the rosy moments gone? Why allow our own insecurities limit our happiness right? Maybe its time to let your other half decide what he/she want..and what not...

Trust, hope, persevere

p/s: The examples given above are not all about my relationship, but of those around me.

Ini mini miny moe

15th - Tong & Chan's Convocation
17th- Ja Pei's Convocation
17th-23rd- Uncle's birthday celebration

There are 3 important events next month. Tong and Chan are in Hull, and Ja Pei in Birmingham. The 3 of them used to be my room mates during our college years in China. Reasons I should attend their convocation:

1. Graduation is one of the important events in life
   
2. I have not seen Tong & Chan for years not even during their stay in UK!
3. I don't know when I'll ever meet them again?
   

My uncle on the other hand, will be celebrating his 51st or is it 50th birthday at Edinburgh, Scotland. Reasons to go:

1. Parents strongly encourage me to go because I have missed a few family reunions for 2-3 years in a row.
2. Because they're my FAMILY!
3. They flew all the way from Hong Kong + cousin Olie who's travelling all over the world

Given that, I feel the pressure to do my dissertation as the time is ticking..FAST.

My instinct tells me that I shouldn't go because:

1. I know that I will have a lot of work to do
   
2. Even if I attend any one event i will feel GUILTY deep down
3. I will feel GUILTY ( I had to say it once more)
   

Travelling expense to Edinburgh.

Air :1 hour (GBP 100)
Rail: 4-6 hour (+-40)

Travelling by air is so much more expensive but its so much more convenient. The thought of having to travel alone again slows down the beat of my heart. Reminds me of the time where I had to wave goodbye at him and my family, fighting back the tears everytime i felt my eyes burn *Heart sinks*....

Feels like I'm finding an excuse to isolate myself again. But I guess its not this time because I really feel the pressure. If I fail my dissertation, I won't get my masters degree. What should I do?

The way it should be

Life is short
Break the rules
forgive quickly
kiss passionately, love truly
laugh constantly
And never stop smiling
no matter how strange life is
Life is not always the party we expected to be
but as long as we are here, we should smile and be grateful.

I want one too!

Went through my emails yesterday. I'm amazed at what people can do these days. Pictures above. Why does the pictures always have to appear on top of the blog instead of the bottom or middle or whatever?? Hrm....But yeah.. anyway i wonder how it feels to wear these colourful balloon dresses. Beautiful barbie-like dresses! *twinkling eyes* haha. It must 've been rili hard for the models to put em on though. Imagine the squeaky sounds at the touch of the normal balloons. Haha.

=D I'm feeling much better today.. Hehe... i was sleeping like a log. Am loving the weather these few days, especially today. Its 5.51 am now. Bright blue sky. Birds chirping. Sunny yet chilly. Hmm it feels so good.

I got to see a happy face on my screen not long ago. Great start. I've FINALLY started reading n writing my thesis introduction. A good feeling that today is going to be a productive one. Haha. Well my goal is to finish the stupid intro by sunday and meet my lecturer on monday.

Anyway. Flashbacks. flashbacks. flashbacking. flashbacked. *teet* I miss my ninja night with him. I remember very clearly that night that mum was having discussions with her downlines. So we were whispering and hiding outside the shoe cupboard. Trying hard to hold in our laughters ^.^ I remember him trying to act like the heroes in action movies where they try to stay low, quiet n move very quickly when there's no one. It was funny. We had toe fights, thumb fights, golf lessons and dancing lessons. *sigh* I miss those times. =)

A night at Angie's

Woke up at 4.30 am today. Still feeling as empty as a drum, I guess i need more time to knock in the fact that I now have to live my life the same way before the magnificent 66 days in cloud 9. For now, isolation. Im in no state of socializing. Not just yet.

Perhaps i should think of the happy moments. I miss the time when we stayed over at Angie"s (y cant i type in the apostrophe? hrm...). Our escapade from revisions and assignments *winks*. Haha...

We bought lots of food... oven-baked pizza, garlic bread, juices, chips chips n morreee chips. Tried to beat each other"s score in wii fit, volleyball, boxing, tennis, etc.... The look on his face when i finally defeated him. Haha. Priceless. He said that it was his intention to let me win ^.^ His triumphant look on the other hand gave me more motivation to try harder to beat his score! haha..

We watched some weird movies too. As the fast paced music started to drum our ears, I automatically covered my eyes. He on the other hand tried to hold my hand down. Hehe....Angie n I fell asleep before the last movie ended n he would b the only one who watched it all *sigh*. I wish i could turn back time. Cant stop thinking of him.

On the other side of the world

Trying hard to pretend the non-existence of the most stubborn mucus clotting my right nose, I have decided to create a proper blogosphere.

Sitting on my bed. Emptiness. I miss him. I miss my family. I miss home.

14 hours since my kk-brunei-dubai-london flight + coach ride to coventry. I tear-ed just at the mere thought of him, my family and his family. What more when i receive their text messages or calls.

He was right beside me for slightly more than 2 months. 66 days to be exact. Perth and Kota Kinabalu. I admit there were times where I wished I could just disappear into the thin air. The arguments which seemed to matter so much back then is nothing compared to how much I miss him at this very moment. We were part of each others life, not like we were'nt before. The difference is that we didnt need technology to keep us in each others life. Back to the time 7 hours time difference and the need for msn, skype & facebook.

I shouldnt be sad because it ended. Instead I should be happy because it happened. Right?

Longing once more for him to be by my side.