Actually today is SPM(Msia Education Cert Exam)...as well as also my big day.
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I try my best and try it very hard to "fall in love" to this stupid subject...yet when ever i read the blog written or what he trying to describe nor explain it to his students by Mr Azman, yet i couldnt write a single words to explain or elaborate in bm!! Feel headache..kinda feel that beginner learn to drunk!! and some times need to take paracetamol to reduce the unconscious feel!!! i hate to do all these things including take paracetamol...i really cant do it with natural feel to proceed the subject.
A love couples will said: If equal affection cannot be, let the more loving be me.
And for me: If the im become a good girl, to do something which is will make me get headache;why dont or why cant i become a bad girl for a temp moment;and fully put my effort for my QS and ISMM?
I remembered dr zalmy told me: in life we have to find a balance point when ever we need to make a decision; u cant requested to have both things at the same time!!this is life!! I know that when i need to make a decision between i should go to sit or not to go to sit for the paper. At least, i decided not to go sit for the paper! I also know that when i make this decision i a girl that kinda violate to my parents; however in such situation, i force to make this decision.
怕什麼 皮膚都擦破 還有心中的烈火;
至少我 看到特別多 風景沒白白錯過;
我們受傷 我們越強;
風浪 打造夢想;
希望我的人生沒有遺憾;
For me...which situation can make my
人生沒有遺憾? xx? tarc's papers? Honestly,tarc's papers!! why??coz..a ha..no reasons..dont asked why!! i wont responded it!!
Second, the emo-ness makes me need to take medication to reduce the pain feel..why dont i be stupid cum naughty to make a such decisions?
Well i choose not to go to sit for the exam...i sure that u will ask me WHY? You already paid for the resitXX(a.k.a most XXX language)? i try not to give any reason(s) to whom ever asked me this question..because the more you explain the more peoples feel like you scared to face the problem and u never try your best!!And guess i will get such sentences:
- Your action is the most foolish!!
- You wasting your parents MONEY!!
- you make your parents most dis pointed!!!
and blar-la-blar-blar!!!!!non- stop booming....and pity my ears..coz have to received all the non-sens sentences!!
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Back to college today to settle all the payments. Honestly, its reminds a lots of memories that those days i go to college to attened lecture class nor tutorial class. I surprised and feel so miracles. I saw many changes especially the canteen2 where those days just a table with long chair; however today what i saw is table with INDIVIDUAL chairs..that's awesome. I believed that the college and the affairs officers put much effort to serve the students better!! Well done TARC!!
Pampered my self by having a Fish head mee hoon at Canteen 2..which is one of my favorite food at tarc. The taste for today meals is not as usual!?is it because of im moody? or others things that make me feel irritating? XX? no, i give up i dont want to resit XXXXX.. And AGAIN pampered my-self..went to starbucks to have a GreenTea Frappuccino!! ha..thanks to vincent tan and my aunt!!
Is it self-defense or self protect nor too self-fish??i not sure!! Been at TARC for so many years..during these years that i at tarc..i make lots of compliance to my parents! At first:
- i hate tarc coz i need to prepared my self so early!
- damn!! far away form my house; need to take 3 transit!!
- stupid tar..what's a large campus that make me feel faith-ed..like a jungle
- such a small size canteen for both canteen,cant even find a place during peak hours..
- hard to find parking in the campus!!
Not everything in life is perfect...世上並無完美，失敗和勝利也非絕對，一切，只有平常 and當不再執著、不再強求的時候，失去的反而能有機會再重新擁有的…these sentences i grabbed from Jamie Chik in one of the tvb drama: "born rich" may be due to these 2 sentences that she said and its reflects what happened in my life right now..i guess,i think that's the reasons i fall in love to her==> i mean she become my idol 精神支柱 in my daily life and the most important is give my a strength in my study!! may be many of them will said:what? how old you are? you like Jamie Chik? Are you crazy?..ha ha ha ..i wont border what ever people had said..the most important is i just want to become my self ..i dont want follow others to strees my delf to become others...it is not my way!!
Not to stress my to become other people;
Not to borders what peoples had said;
"buat bodoh and anggap all the peoples D.I.E ";
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Back to the online oxygen story....FB!!
Many of my friends ,lecturer and senior consultants posted bday wishes to my fb wall..Thanks a million and really appreciate all the good birthday wishes and greetings from all of you!! Form today onwards im 1 years older.....
Once again, hope everything goes smooths with me...no Halangan!! thank you!! thank you!!
只要不为了一些过去的事耿耿于怀,其实快乐很简单。。。this is what i want to be form today ONWARDS!!!
