A long overdue update

So here we are, a family of five. It's been two months now since we met our little girl in China. People use the cliché all the time that it's "been a whirlwind," but I can't think of another better description. 

Fast, furious (at times), and scattering debris all over the place. (if dirty clothes and Legos count as debris)

There have been many joys with Campbell: Christmas Eve & Christmas morning. Silly laughter while jumping on the trampoline. Playing chase with her brothers. Dancing & singing at our spontaneous dance parties.

 There have also been many difficult moments that have accompanied this transition. Not all of them have to do with Campbell; her middle brother (Asher) continues his death-defying "stunts" around the house. I swear that boy needs to live life wearing a helmet. He's fine, but not before a trip to the ER for a nasty cut after falling off the couch.

But even as we've been pretty low-key over the past two months, life is still pretty tiring. Campbell's behavior and development continues to steadily improve as the bonding and acceptance happens, but she still has times where you can tell she is still so very unsure about us. Honestly, it's hard not to take that personally, but we know that God is using even those times to mend her broken & abandoned heart. We have to constantly remind ourselves that unconditional love isn't always reciprocated...otherwise it wouldn't be unconditional! We're grateful for the journey that He has us on. Each part of the family has its' part. Brennan & Asher continue to initiate with her with tangible acts of love and kindness (and sometimes the opposite, especially when she breaks their Legos). It is so encouraging when they step in to help calm her or when they keep asking for hugs when she pushes them away. They are pursuing, and it's working!

Thankfully we've also had tremendously good news on the medical side of things. We haven't shared a whole lot about this because it has taken some time to get the bottom line results. In short, the pediatrician was pretty worried about Campbell's head size. It's off-the-charts-large for her age (literally the same size as Erin's head). We measured just to make sure. The worry was that something was inside her skull causing it to grow faster than normal. Something like spinal fluid (hydrocephalus) or a tumor, etc. The words neurosurgeon and brain tumor were thrown around for a few weeks. Even after what we've been through already...those are still scary words! 

We were finally able to get straight answers after an MRI at UNC Children's. The results came back completely NORMAL. Campbell is simply "fearfully & wonderfully made" ... with a big noggin.

With that sigh of relief we are now turning our sights on her eyes. Campbell has Esotropic strabismus. The muscles around her eyes are not attached correctly and she has a hard time controlling them. They cross. They work independently of each other. One is "lazy." The first eye doctor we saw recommended surgery right away, and we are seeking a second opinion just to make sure. But it sure does look like Campbell will have eye surgery where they will realign and reposition each of the muscles connected to her eyeballs. NBD, right? 

So there's a Mullis Family Update for you. Thanks so much for caring for us and praying for us. We're confident that we're right where God wants us to be, and we long to walk more closely in the Spirit's power to meet each new challenge.

 **Photos coming soon!

 

Home.

It's been a week since we left China for home. Time really passes quickly when you're not living in a hotel room!

We were welcomed back at the DC airport with Campbell's first snow. She thought it was too cold to play in, but she did get a big handful at least! We finally made it back to Raleigh on Thanksgiving Day at 10am, and we had a wonderful reunion with our boys and our extended family. Thanks so much to Cayce Wagoner Photography for putting this together for us. This slideshow captures so much emotion!

Click HERE to view slideshow

Marty's Mom and Grandma really pulled double duty as they stayed with our boys at our house while we were gone. They also had full Thanksgiving lunch spread ready for us when we returned home from the airport. We can't thank them enough!

Since that day our extended family members have slowly returned home after good visits and lots of hugs. We have tried to settle into a new groove as a family of five. It has mostly gone well. Jet-lag is a bear, y'all, especially with a toddler. She keeps waking up ready to start the day at 3 or 4 am. Campbell is getting used to so many new things at once, so we're trying to keep things simple for now. Establishing routines as much as we can, etc.

Introducing her to playing with her big brothers has been rocky at times, however. Brennan and Asher have been so amazing, though. They are REALLY loving and surprisingly gentle to their new little sister, but she is not always open to playing with them. Or even looking at them for that matter. Again, it's to be expected that the bonding would take time, but we so want our boys to be rewarded for their super-big-brotherness with a smile, or a giggle, or even eye contact. They ADORE her and it is so sweet to watch. They want to smother her with hugs and kisses and show her all the fun toys they have. Asher insists on sitting next to her at every meal. He keeps moving his chair to sit as close as possible to her. We're trying some new things lately (like the adventure of letting B & A feed Campbell at dinner haha), but we just keep preaching that consistent love over time is the formula we all have to subscribe to here.

We head to the doctor in a couple of days for her first check-up on U.S. soil. We have also already been referred to an ophthalmologist for her eyes. We haven't really talked about that much, but her poor little eyes are pretty severely crossed at times. It has definitely gotten better since those first few days, though! We are a little anxious about her health for some reason, even though we don't have any "glaring" reasons to be. Just pray that we would give that over to the Lord and trust Him for her health even though there are so many unknowns from the first 2 years of her life.

Please pray for:

• Us as God fills us with his love that we can pour that love back out in its purest form.
• Campbell to grow to trust us and to be open to our love as well as love from our boys.
• Our boys not to feel rejected when Campbell refuses their love and attention.
• Patience and wisdom as we parent all our children.
• Us to have strength and energy even though we're really tired. Still getting up with Cam most nights in the middle of the night, much like having a newborn. She was sleeping thru the night with us in China, but time change has thrown her off.
• On that note, pray that we would all get on some sort of "normal" sleep patterns ASAP.
• Medically- please pray for her eyes to be strengthened and for doctors to give us a clear course of treatment to correct the weakness that is causing the crossed eyes. Pray that it is correctable without surgery.
• Pray that the verbal part of her brain to soak in all the words she hears and for it to develop and grow. For now she is completely nonverbal. She is only making a few cooing sounds.

Play Time During Down Time

So we've seen very many "officials" during our stay here. We finally have Cam's Chinese passport, Birth Certificate, and Certificate of Abandonment. We took all that to the US Consulate today in order for them to issue her a US Visa! We will return to get that tomorrow, and then we can take her home!

But in the meantime...well, we're bored. Stir crazy. Cabin fever. OVER IT. The hotel is super-nice, but it is not home, and we're ready to "live" somewhere else for a change. Somewhere where we don't eat out at every meal.   :-)   (hellooooooo getting back on Thanksgiving Day! looking forward to some good turkey & veggies)

The downtime has given us a chance to play with Campbell one-on-one and find out more about her personality. She's very shy & calm until she doesn't get her way - then she's got a very short fuse!

But she loves to sit & play with blocks, read books, and play with mommy:

It Takes a Village

So the highlight of the past few days has certainly been hanging with the new families who have just arrived in our city who are a part of our agency as well. There are 4 of us total; two families from AL, one from FL, and us. We've adopted two little boys and two little girls...all special needs children.

It has really been such a blessing to share our stories, go out around town together (zoo, etc), and pray for & encourage one another. Not to mention borrowing strollers, puffs, wipes, bottles, and everything else from each other!

Here's a group pic:

We also had the chance to hang out with Erin's cousin, Ryan, as well as her husband, daughter, and newly adopted son! They adopted a 5-year-old boy that they named Austin. Ryan took all the pics from that night, but we've got some great ones to share one day. It is just incredible that we were able to travel to China together to get our kiddos. What a great blessing! We'll see them more before we leave, but we are in different "tour groups" for our time here...so our schedules have been a little different.

We took a beautiful stroll in the gardens at our hotel. We are staying at THE Garden Hotel after all. Here's a few more shots of Campbell and the scenery:

You gotta wonder what's going on behind those gorgeous brown eyes...

Waterfall and lagoon

Feeding the goldfish

And just so you all know it's not all been a "walk in the park" (pun intended), I caught this big 'ole temper tantrum on camera as well. She didn't want to walk on the grass, but that is also very Chinese of her. They do NOT walk on the grass normally, and the signs everywhere remind you of that.

We'll be back tomorrow to post some pics of the Zoo and the River Cruise...but we are in our last days of this trip! We begin our journey home on Wednesday. Not a minute too soon. :-)

Adventures in Guangzhou

So we're just about to wrap up stuff for the Provincial side of things...meaning that Campbell has obtained her Chinese Passport which we will take to the US consulate next week.

But for today, what that meant for us is no appointments around town! So we took some time to get a little adventurous and check out the local scene. We visited a beautiful park in the midtown area, then did some shopping.

Beautiful view at LiuHua Hu Park.

Daddy snuggles in the park.

As far as life goes...we are still getting to know our little girl. We have made some huge strides in just 4 days, however! I'll never forget the first time we her giggle. Or finding her tickle-ish spot. Or even her first "throw down, blow up, all out 2-year-old-temper-tantrum." We're catching up on several months of life in just a few short days.

Sleep is getting much better for all of us (she's napping right now actually...YAY!). Her bowel issues are getting better. And she's just all around moving more: walking, throwing, stacking, waving, etc. It was really hard those first two days when she was really in shock, not gonna lie. 

In fact, it was so difficult that we made a very tough decision NOT to visit her orphanage. Again, her caretakers brought her to us here at the Provincial Capital; her orphanage is actually 5 hours away from here in a remote location. We spoke with other families here who adopted children from the same orphanage this week. None of them were making the trip either. All our children were having major difficulties and we just didn't have a peace about making the trip. 

Instead, God opened up a different door. We were able to visit an orphanage here in Guangzhou with our friends, The Adams's. Their little boy, Benjamin, is 18-months-old. We went with them yesterday as they toured his facility and visited the spot where he was found abandoned. 

It was extremely helpful for us to experience this with them! We have a better understanding of certain behaviors that we see out of Campbell after what we saw and heard there. We know it's not completely the same, but we are just praying that God will mold it all together for our good. 

Lastly, we uploaded a little video our Little Cutie having some fun at the park. Just listen to this giggle-box! Oh, and apologies again to the Adams's for the Red & Black and "Power G" in this shot. We have become great friends with y'all, and you being die-hard Auburn fans just happens to make it a little awkward that we packed so much UGA gear. :-)

Our "Little" Girl is MUCH Bigger Than We Expected!

So things are going well here! Campbell is getting more & more comfortable it seems. There is much less crying at least than the first two days. Even at the medical checkup today, when they had to take a blood sample, she cried very little! Of course, a Cotton Candy flavored "Dum-dum" sucker helped her get through. ;-)

Speaking of the medical checkup...we finally witnessed first hand Campbell getting weighed & measured. No more guesswork based on pictures or wondering about how heavy her clothes were, etc.

Our sweet "little" 2-year-old just weighed in at 24 lbs. (fully clothed with a diaper & shoes, etc), and she stands 33" tall!

She's WAY bigger than we anticipated!?! She's eating like a champ, too, but we were also told to expect that as well. Eating is comforting to her (would insert a joke here about Erin eating chocolate over here and knowing how she feels...but I'll refrain).

The funny thing about it is that we brought lots & lots of clothes for her, but most are way too small. So we'll be headed to the mall tomorrow to scoop the latest Chinese fashion and get our sweetie some cute clothes that actually fit.

We'll leave you with a couple more pics today: the first is actually her "autograph" on her adoption paperwork. Just beside where we signed our names saying that we would promise to love her and NEVER abandon her, she also made her "mark" to acknowledge that she was present at the taking of that oath.

The second picture represents our second major landmark of our time together so far. The first major landmark was a poopie diaper, but I doubt you all want to see that one (and no, I didn't photograph it either).

Today she took her first afternoon nap with us! And this is her amazing "post-nap-bed-head" look:

Thanks for your prayers!

明天见！

Every New Beginning Comes From Some Other Beginning's End

What. A. Day.

There are so many clichés that we can throw out there: (The waiting is the hardest part! We are making memories! What an emotional roller coaster!)

But today, November 17th, 2014, we met Campbell for the first time. We gave her a new name. We gave her lots of hugs & kisses. We gave her a photo album of her new family. We gave her formula & some diaper changes. We gave her a bath. We gave her a stuffed Panda. She gave us more than she'll ever know.

It was surreal, honestly, the whole day. It began at the Civil Affairs Office. One minute we are laughing nervously with some new friends who are also here adopting through our agency, then the next minute they call our name, we walk to the middle of the room, hand Campbell to us, and we are suddenly "Mullis Party of Five." We are so grateful for how God has woven all these pieces together to come together at such a time as this!

We were able to meet with Campbell's caretakers today. It was an honor to see them and thank them for their care. It was quite a journey for them; they deliver the children to the Provincial Capital City (in our case Guangzhou, China), and that is about a 5-hour trek from her orphanage & hometown...one-way! We hope to visit there on Thursday, but that is still yet to be determined (read: they did not yet give us permission).

In addition to the long journey, she also had to say goodbye to these folks. The only people she has ever known. She also had a little friend who was adopted today by a family from Washington. They have been together for many months in the same room, and suddenly they are apart. So today Campbell had some new beginnings, but we also saw her experience some painful endings as well...thus the title of this post.

Campbell's caretakers and medical officer journeyed 10 hours roundtrip to bring her to our arms!

We spent the rest of the day getting to know each other. Playing, eating, trying to comfort her. She has been on such a traumatic journey, so we knew it would not be easy. She's still in some shock, I'm sure, and honestly so are we. But we went to sleep tonight (after a few rough attempts to get her to relax and give into the need for sleep) with a daughter. In a crib. Beside our bed. In cute pink PJ's.

Fast asleep after her big day.

We promise to keep you updated as we have several more days here and lots & lots of appointments all over the place. But here are some prayer requests that are on our hearts at the moment:

Please pray for:

• A deep bond of trust to form between us. We felt this the most when putting her to bed tonight...she was so scared (and rightly so from her perspective!). Pray that we can do all the "little things" throughout the days ahead that demonstrate to her that we can be trusted.
• 
  
• The unknown's. Yes, we've only begun to get to know her, but it is becoming obvious that there are some undiagnosed health issues with our sweet girl. We pursued a Special Needs Adoption with a clear calling from the Lord, so we won't be shaken from that. But we are experiencing some physical challenges with her that were not on her medical records anywhere. We were told that was possible (normal even) when dealing with adoptive medicine, but that is now our reality and not just a possibility. Pray for us to tap into a deeply seated trust in God's majestic plan for Campbell's life!
• 
  
• Sleep. The most discouraging thing about jet-lag (to us at least) is that you're so exhausted when you go to bed, but you can only sleep in 3-4 hours spurts. Pray that we can find the rest we need to function properly!
• 
  
• Erin and myself. This might sound totally weird, but we need to trust in ourselves. Not like trusting in our own strength / flesh, but trusting that we are God's provision for Campbell as much as she is His provision for us. He will give us grace for the moment, but pray that we will live in that reality abundantly over the next few days / months / years. 

Thanks for getting to the bottom of the post. :-)  We can't imagine doing this without a team of family, friends, and ministry partners. We made the statement the other day that we're so proud of and humbled by the Kingdom of God working itself out through our adoption. You all are the best.

谢谢！Thanks!

明天见,

The Mullises, Party of Five.