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har chiu!! sneezing non stop for the past 12 hours alrdy! I can't even sleep!
anyway sleepless nights like these just leads me to ponder on many things..
"Don't live to just be a Critic"
I've been challenged! Many times the way I learn, or perhaps taught to learn is through observation.. I observe the things people do, and learn not to make these so call "mistakes" or rather conflict in opinion.. We all have different "style" of doing things, and when I see the "style" that in general disagrees with my value system and principles, I would tell myself to never repeat that particular action..
However, observing others have so much so becomes the "way of life".. instead of looking inwardly, I tend to look outwardly, at what other people do, and it becomes so easy for me to judge.. sometimes when we as leaders teaches our members certain values, the way for them to see is to see through the lens of others, by doing so, I would often use 3rd party example, and in times like these I struggle, am I gossiping?? even though it's out of good intention that the example is used to shed light in certain situations, and a lot of times, only through analogy it's possible to explain complicated concepts..
But by doing so, the line between gossiping and sharing from experience becomes so blurred.. putting myself in my own shoe, would I ever like to be quoted as an example that one shouldn't follow? chinese saying.. 对事不对人。but 事情发生在那人身上。。对事就＝对人!
I'm still trying to figure this out, to draw a clearer line in my life to not just live through the lens of others, but look back inwardly, what mistake I am making that I would not want myself to make.. takes a lot of self reflection.............
Alwaysss trace back to the motive of our speech.. why do we say the things we do.. ??
don't get carried awayyy~
"How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?" Matthew 7:3-5
what we could have been, 6:09 AM.
Monday, November 21, 2011
Is there such a thing as "you are the ONE?"
the one that is destined to be with us.....??
I've been challenged with this thought ever since I was a kid..
Probably because my parents was each other's first love,
and it kind of inculcated in me this belief, and this desire.....
that it is possible to find one person that will be with u from the start to the end..
the ideal idea of having just one person for you..
this one true person God has destined for us...
but why is it that this idea has been challenged so many times?
like is it even possible... is it an extremist theology...?
Christians, aren't we contradicting ourselves?
When we say the fundamental belief of ours is that God has a destiny for us,
that God has destined us to be at where we are, to do what we do...
if He is a God with a purpose and plan for us....
then.. in regards to relationship, to our life partner, something as serious as this,
someone that is to walk with us for the REST of our lives, (if this is not serious for you, then i don't know what is)... why do we question whether God has this destined person for us as well?
We say we trust that God is good.. do we truly believe he will not short-change us?
Why do we find it so difficult to believe that there is someone like that out there for us?
our perfect match.. how often do we overlook that God actually is and can be our divine matchmaker?
Of cause all of this being said.. I think we should look at this idea at its extreme, to understand why most of us find it so difficult to accept..
Because when we say "there is 'the one' that God has destined for us." we often put a fullstop there! and when we pray about it, and get into a relationship thinking that God you have told me this person is the one. we put a fullstop there as well.. The extreme view of this is that, when something go wrong, and eventually the relationship didn't work out, then what is this idea of having just ONE person? what is this idea of destined to be with the right person?
in human nature, we doubt, we question God.. didn't you review to me that this is THE ONE? what happened?....
this is an irresponsible statement for anyone to make....
one revelation God has given me is this simple fact..
"Am I in the CENTER of your relationship?"
let's look at it this way..
a couple having prayed about it, and got the peace and confirmation from God that they are for each other.. but along their Christian walk, even their walk as a Christian couple, they lost sight of God.. they no longer uphold their relationship into God's hand... God is no longer in the center of this relationship.. eventually they lost sight of why they are together... eventually, they may fall out.....
another extreme view is that.....
a couple may not even seem to be right from the start.. typically (from the standpoint of Christians), maybe a Christian and non-Christian getting together, they may contradict each other's most fundamental beliefs and values.. but if the Christian can lead the non-Christian to knowing Christ.. and from then on put God in the center they may be able to last all the way....
so the BASIC question is just "is Jesus in the center of the relationship?"
yes, God may have reviewed to us that this person is a perfect match for us.. but that doesn't mean we don't work in a relationship to make it work...
then now the next part of the problem..
should we as Christian pray and ask God to direct us to find our half?
If we say that God you understand me more than I understand myself, that you can count the hair on my head.. wouldn't God understand that other person just as well....?
How hard is it to actually see the full transparency of a person...? of anyone...?
Seriously at this day and age, you hear about this in real life examples, or you learn about it when watching western TVs, that there are possibility of homosexuals who aren't ready to come out of the closet, and they simply get together with an opposite sex to throw people off the radar, to ever thinking that they are homosexuals.. some to the extreme of marrying an opposite sex, and have sideline affairs with another homosexual, and the husband or wife never found out (not at first anyway)...
we often don't even understand ourselves seriously! let alone trying to understand another person.. and at the initial stage of "chemistry" or "sparks", i believe all of us have heard of this before that...."love is blind" we overlook or we can't see the full transparency of the person that is standing in front of us.. even when we are married, this full-transparency is still not achieved.. only God know us inside out!
Christians, we all have to admit that we are human and we do make mistakes.. but we also believe that we have a God, and this God would never make a single mistake.
Don't you want to trust him in this? don't you want to find that person he has prepared for you?
Christians, especially youths.... i hope you all know that God has a call for you..
when we hear the word 'call', we immediately want to reject this idea because we find a strong positive correlation between call and full time.. like when we are told "God has a call for you" it means that you are going to work full-time..
let's change our mindset! A very well respected pastor of mine, ever once said that in a church about 1-2% of the congregation will be called to work full time, to be teachers of the law, evangelist, missionaries... etc... (try and do this calculation for your own church and find out)...
does that mean that the other 98% of the congregation does not have a call from God???
Absolutely NOT!!! it just means that the 98% is called to something else! maybe be a successful businessman, maybe a teacher in school...? we are all called to be people of influence! so that the world may see that our God is the true God..
Pastor Samuel said this in one of the combine cell (if you all remembered...) that we should first get our call.. then ask for your partner.... it basically means we should first know what God wants to do in our lives, before we get the opinion of the other person..
I also recently come to understand this.. someone ever said that when you're not in a relationship, you tend to have more time to do God's work... for example spend more time with your members, you tend to be able to seem to be more "pastoral"..... but God has revealed to me that, if your half has the same direction of call, that truly, 2 is better than 1, that 2 of you will support each other in the ministry and call I have for you!
once again let me emphasize that the most important thing is still
"Jesus be the center of the relationship"!!
let's Believe that God is our divine matchmaker! that our God is a good God!
I hope this help some of us to gain some perspective.. I only got all these revelation from God 1 year ago.. but when this revelation came, it is here to stay! and deeply rooted in my Christian walk now....
what we could have been, 11:12 PM.
Friday, September 23, 2011
the Lord says.. "I'm here"
many times when we are feeling the worst kind of emotion,
that really can push you to tears, God has given us wonderful gifts,
like friends, friends who understand you, who can just be there for you,
who feel for you, who listens to you..
some tear because they're happy, some because they are sad, some because they are angry..
the interesting thing is that we are all programmed differently,
all of us respond very differently..
For me, when God touches me, tears will surely come,
everytime, whether is it when he comforts me, or just speak to me,
i'll always find it so overwhelming, and tears would just come..
another thing that triggers me is when I'm really angry, when the boiling point reaches beyond the max scale.. In the recent days I've come to build up a frustration, and finally to breaking point, I thank God for giving me friends, who at the first moment gave me the comfort, who avail their time even though it's wee hours to just talk to me.. cool me down.. ask me "are you ok?"
However, even over 2 days, that frustration, that annoyance, that bitterness just don't seem to go away, even when I've let it out, when I try to ignore it.. Funny thing is that at this level of emotion, I would have already cried, but for some reason I just didn't.. But that feeling isn't going away, and I seriously hate feeling this way..
yesterday night, as I was at my computer, God just hit me "I'M HERE" and instantaneously, I began to tear in his presence, I felt him cleansing me, cleansing me of my emotion, of my bitterness, and as I cry, all the emotion seem to be washed away, all the unhappiness are slowly going away.. I just began to pour out to him my heart's cry, and just dwell in his presence, let him do his amazing work of comforting me..
After that, the heavy knot in my heart just went away, yes the issue that made me reach my boiling point will still be there, as it has already happened.. Sometimes issues has to be dealt on humanly level as well, I have to sort it out with myself, with others, but issues MUST definitely be dealt on a Godly level, because only God can do the internal healing.. at God's presence, he untied the knot, my negative feelings has dropped to it's minimal...
Just felt God wants to remind me that He is in control!
His comfort really was really beyond anything!
first run to God, let him be the one to heal your emotion.....
what we could have been, 1:51 PM.
Thursday, September 8, 2011
To Overcome or To Be Overcome..
It has been a while since I have last blogged, and certainly there are many events that I have yet to blog about.. Like my India trip experience, post-trip experience, and also all the miscellaneous things I have been doing, e.g. zone 1 girl's outing and yesterday's experience at lion king musical..
There are so much to share, yet when one loses the consistency in blogging, it is very hard to write a good post including all recent events..
Among all, the thing I really want to share the most is my India Mission Trip experience, however, I refuse to write the entire experience all-in-1 post. Firstly, because it is not possible to share everything here, so if you're interested ask me personally, I will definitely share with you, and secondly, I don't want this testimony to be some kind of "adrenaline rush", a short-term hyped..
Probably I will include different part of my trip's experience in different relevant posts.
Ok, now for what I want to blog about today.... I am currently reading the book "Shaping History through prayer and fasting" by DEREK Prince.. He is an amazing author! I just finished the first chapter of the book, and already I am transfixed.
He mention one simple concept we all christians know, and that is "we are to be the salt of the earth". And there's a fact that as christian, when we stay righteous and align with God, we have the power to withhold God's judgement on evil-doers, as well as sustain God's mercy and grace on this earth.
In the story of Abraham and Sodom, Abraham made a pact with God, that as long as he could find 10 righteous people, God would spare the whole city.. It is also estimated that Sodom in her days has probably no less than 10,000 citizens, that is a ratio of 1 righteous man to a 1,000 evil man(or sinners).
And we as christian ought to recognise that "our" righteousness, or rather as long as we stay righteous, and live by God's word, we have the ability to petition God to spare this fallen world.. That we can be more than just a little light in so much darkness.
Youth alive now probably has about 120 members? that means we can withhold God's judgement on 120,000 sinners! Can you imagine what kind of impact we actually have in the world if we All stay in-line with God!?
"If we in the church fail to hold back the forces of wickedness, our judgment is to be handed over to those very forces" -derek prince-
In Romans 12:21, "Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good"
It is very clear that we only have 2 choices, either to overcome or to be overcome.
I believe it is time we stop questioning the so-called grey areas in life, whether we should do this or we should do that, whether the bible told us to do this or to do that. I believe other than the word of God, God has given us also the Holy Spirit, who resides in us, who is our counselor, who can and will help us make the right decisions in life.
Instead of challenging God's word by saying, "hmmm maybe I can do this, because the bible never mention not to do it" let's be mindful to reflect upon the motive behind our every action. Let's involve Holy Spirit in our every thought and action!
Let's choose to overcome evil and not be overcome by it! Friends, there's only these 2 options!
It is like in India, the people there believe in every and any God. It is not difficult for them to accept Jesus Christ, however, it is difficult for them to accept Christ as the ONLY Lord and Saviour in life.. It is also why they find themselves trapped in bondage, because God's full healing power, be it physically or spiritually cannot be Fully manifested in their lives..
It is never a grey area, never a maybe, it always is a YES or NO when it comes to following Jesus! And I truly believe this is not just true when we accept Christ into our lives, but more so true when we learn to live out a Christ-like life!
what we could have been, 11:59 PM.
One of my favourite lines on friendsJoey: Ross I've got a science question for you,
If the homosepians were in fact Homo-sepians,
Is that why they're extinct?
Ross: Erm Joey, homosepians are people
Joey: Hey I'm not judging
Lol!
I never fail to laugh at this part!
what we could have been, 4:15 AM.
4 DAYS to going INDIA
there's much uncertainty returning back to India this time round,
it's a time where i truly need a compass from God,
to guide and show me specifically what i need to do
there's so much one can expect visiting a country with so much spiritual warfare
the people there have so much struggles because
they believe in any god, and thus struggle with serious spiritual bondages
the last experience had so much to offer,
coming back s'pore with so much fire and testimonies for God
I pray that this time, God will do even more!
as i'm preparing for the trip, I came across my FAVORITE, most RESPECTED pastor's sermon.
Pastor Peter Tsukahira gives excellent teaching on the word of God.
In one small part of his sharing, he pointed out this verse,
Matt 24:14
"and this gospel of the kingdom will be preached in all the world as a witness to all the nations,
and then the end will come" (NJKV)
and he highlighted "gospel of the kingdom",
he mention that there's a difference between "gospel of salvation" and "gospel of kingdom"
I learnt that, "gospel of salvation" is just the beginning,
it means we go out and preach the message of the bible,
people believe, repent and are baptized and they come to church.
after that we "count them" and that's how we know how many people are coming to faith
And that's really the first step.
we call that gospel of salvation, and some people are satisfied with that,
and think that their job is "over" as when you get the people into church.
But really, that's just the beginning of the "gospel of the kingdom"
"gospel of the kingdom" is what happens after people come to church,
is that they get mentored, and disciplined, and discipled,
and equipped and they mature in the church,
and when mature believers are ready, they get sent out from the church
The whole point of a church is for the equipping of the saints for the
work of service, and then we get sent
The real benchmark for success of a church today is how much impact
are you having on your world. How much transforming power are you releasing
into the education system, when you walk out there as God's chosen man or
God's chosen woman
How much impact are you having on the market place? How much impact are you having
on the government and judiciary
This is how the body of Christ changes the world. This is the Gospel of the Kingdom
And this part of his message (which btw is <5% of the depth of his sharing)
struck me a lot. Something that as a christian i really need to reflect on..
what kind of gospel have i been sharing?
that as church leaders, we ought to be more concern about how we build the
members in the church, so that they can be a witness in their market place!
And I know God wants me to bring this point across in India..
Still discerning and forming the sharing..
pray for the team and me! we need God's covering and protection!
so, goodbye for now, see you back on 10august! :)
what we could have been, 4:38 PM.
my advance bday celeb 2011 @ Marina Barragehaha ok, i'm leaving for India in 1week's time, so decided to do a few advance celeb..
esp since when i come back, anne and zh's 21st..
would be a busy month already without any of these celeb..
am really glad to celebrate early with both my secondary and poly friends!
24 july saturday, was my celebration with the ladies from
geylang methodist secondary school!
haha, decided to fulfill our long awaited picnic + kite flying at barrage!
they requested food like potato salad, egg sandwiches, veggie salads..
haha which seriously speaking i have no clue as to how to make them!
soooo.. went youtube and search, watched a few videos and merged the recipes,
haha, i only took ingredients that i believe we know how to eat..
and it tasted good! I'm totally fascinated myself!
the chicken salad surprised me the most, cause didn't know so many layer of taste can be created when celery and grapes are added!
i also searched how to make strawberry dipped choco,
something i've been wanting to try, it's a simple concept,
yet there's some steps that must be observed.. like can only dip when strawberries are completely dry..
had alot of fun making all the food.. but super tiring process..
only bought the ingredients on thursday night, made the japanese jelly first..
then friday i had cell, and sat cclt training 9-3..
so only had the night to prepare, started at 1am, ended at 8am! -.-!
and went for cclt at 9am! i was totally a walking zombie :p
didn't know it would take so long! the tedious part is the prep of ingredients,
chopping, mincing took the most time.. then finally melting the chocolate and waiting for it to cool, then melt the next batch.........
but the time was worth spending, cause i learned so much in the process...
the afternoon came finally!! dar and ning (no. 2 ning haha).. we packed everything as fast as possible, and made tea(picnic must have tea! it was so shiok) then off we went..
the taxi uncle didn't know where was barrage! -.- so we went in crazy circles! into MBS then out of MBS to shenton way, just circling that place, finally i use google map and we found our way there!
thank God for google map invention and 3G network!
but cab fare was $17 !!! -.-
anw, we met up with the rest (chris, dia, pear) and started our picnic lunch! we all enjoyed ourselves, took turns to take polaroid pictures! (my new craze:p)
we couldn't fly kite btwn 5-7 coz of NDP and helicopters were flying by..
so we took our time to take pictures and eat..
finally at 7+ we let our kite flyyy high high! rather fun process seeing it up in the air!
and the best thing of coz, since NDP preview was on,
fireworks!!!! it was super nice! haha, on top of that the night view was just really good,
with bright lights over at MBS and flyer!
haha i think i'm rather lucky! last saturday i went keppel bay and saw fireworks,
again this sat i went barrage and saw fireworks again!
next sat i'm going keppel again, and i'm sure i'm gonna see fireworks! it's a can't get enough of fireworks month???? haha:P
anw enjoyed myself thoroughly! catching up and having funnnnn!
love you girls! meetup 20aug for chris' very belated bday haha!
can't wait! :D
what we could have been, 8:14 PM.
