Friday, June 1, 2012

Updates of All Kinds... (possibly of zero interest)

#1  It's June 1st and I turned the heat on.  

#2 This cat is too big for this box.



#3  I think, despite my fears that I may have scared them off with my unbridled zaniness, that I may have made a new friend.  Like a potential real friend.  

#4 Eustace Conway... he's a maniac.  Last American Man by Elizabeth Gilbert was a good read.  I felt like she managed to really give a good full scope portrayal of his personality.  If you are interested in biographies check it out.  Also I think there is a History Channel show featuring him coming out soon.  

#5  Mr F and I have started watching Friday Night Lights on Netflix.  It's no Lost, but there are 76 episodes, so that's something.  I'm into the young qb's storyline and the coach & wife, we're also into despising the sponsor/car dealer guy, but unfortunately Minka Kelly is not a good actress and her plot lines are unbelievable... plus it disturbs me when grown ups play teenagers.  So the jury's still out.  

#6 Here are the girls "Fighting for Jesus!" in their new school uniforms.  Kid has a very tongue in cheek sense of humor about attending a religious school. She can be really, really funny.  She gets it.... understands what we believe and don't believe, and is comfortable with the compromise.  She is also super comfortable playing the role of a religious kid, much to her own amusement.  (Did I mention she had me buy her a personalized Bible?) 

#7 Baby is less subtle with her opinions.  While we were out to eat the other night she yelled out "Lutherans are losers!" Later she explained, "Well, they are losers, they don't believe that gay people can get married."  (proudest parenting moment around here, FYI) We're also working on the frequency with which she takes the Lord's name in vain.  For all of her cuteness she has a bit of rebel in her.  Hopefully she won't start smoking on the playground.






Monday, May 28, 2012

Weather Report

"Here in Michigan,

there is extreme cold in winter

and extreme hot in summer,

which is a perfect combination of...

 Hell "

 Kid remarks.

Sunday, May 27, 2012

Sneak Peek

Sometime last weekend, when we were driving out of town, the thought occurred to me.

Blue, it said.

Yeah, why not? Why do we have to stick with the somewhat predictable moss green (or taupes, browns) that so many with these 60s ranches with tan ORANGE brick use.

Sure, it's a reliably good, updated look.

But it isn't interesting.

At first Mr F was a bit skeptical.

No, no, it has to be the right kind of a dark kind of grayish blue, I assured him.

One of the greatest ironies in our relationship is that I'm always better at colors.

But we were scared.

So we still thought maybe moss green.

Then we saw the chip.

Gale Force

I didn't even notice the name or take in it's significance until we were home.

But sweet baby jesus, it's perfect.

It looks great with the brick, but doesn't sell out.  It's a real color.

It's bold.

Our house is set way back up a hill, and it is barely noticeable at the street...

so it can stand a little bold paint choice.

We're framing it off with a dark taupe-y brown (not red brown ya know).

So all the trim, gutters, soffits, window trim, walkway railings, etc will be in the brown.

People, it's going to be a real facelift.


Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Maybe The Worst Is Over?!!

Got the roofing fixed... fourth time's the charm on that one.  The first time they didn't complete it (then never came back?!), the 2nd time they laid them crooked & the 3rd time when they re-did the crooked spot they used the wrong color shingles.  For real.  These yahoos must be getting paid by the day.  Jeez.

Got the siding fixed (ish).  We decided if 2nd times not the charm on that, what are the chances they'll actually improve their cutting and measuring skills by the 3rd time?  At a certain point we just have to accept the fact that using disaster contractors was not the best choice in terms of quality construction but it was the only choice in terms of actually getting any repairs covered by insurance.  It kind of sucks, but that's the way the cookie crumbles.  There is no chance we would have gotten as much out of State Farm if we'd been trying to fight them on our own.

Now we just need: insulation blown in, a light fixture replaced, our driveway re-done (yep, they did a shit ass job the first time... par for the course... they didn't even roll the asphalt... have any idea what a mess that is?!) and then we're done with these guys.  I can't wait!!!!!

Then we can finally move on to getting our yard taken care of... it's a major disaster with huge ground stump mounds, completely ruined lawn from all the tree limb punctures and such, and all the damn weeds I haven't had time to address.  But once it's cleaned up it's not really a rush or emergency.. I figure it might look good NEXT year.

Oh, and we have to paint our house... but we're doing that ourselves because it's cheaper, and considering how things have gone, most likely faster and less trouble.

The good news is, I think I'm done having constant company leering about the outside of my house, sometimes peeing in water bottles and throwing them in the dumpster by garage (smells GREAT in the heat), and sometimes peeing in my shade garden.  It'll be a nice change.  I can also take a shower when ever I feel like it, and the kids will be able to play outside without stepping on nails (hopefully).

Monday, May 21, 2012

Updates

#1   Paleo... I started again, today, after taking my measurements.
       (Holy crap, that was a depressing experience)
       Modified this time, so I don't feel like I'm going to starve to death,
       or have emotional/hunger related issues.

#2  Our house is STILL not done.
      Today we had to have the crew back to point out all of the mistakes
      and ask them to redo stuff.
      This has happened at every stage...
      it's the part that overwhelms me.
      I hate it. I hate having to confront people about their mistakes
      and then have to be here while they fix it...
      it's uncomfortable.
      I just want this to be OVER.

I read an article written about the tornado and recovery, and someone said they weren't prepared for how long this was going to take, or the lack of privacy.  And I was like, YES... that's it.  It's the lack of privacy that just wears you down.  I'm so tired of having to worry about which guys are coming over and when, and feeling observed all the time.  It takes it's toll.

#3  I made 72 cupcakes
      for my mother's surprise b'day party this weekend.
      I made Italian Meringue Buttercream,
      which requires boiling sugar until a precise temperature
      and then slowly streaming it into a beater (while it's on)...
      holy potential skin burns, people!
      I had to keep yelling at Baby to stay AWAY.
      It was the finest icing I've ever made.  I might never go back.

The surprise went off without a hitch.  Interestingly, my mother claims that it's because I'm such a terrible secret keeper (in her opinion) that she really didn't expect anything.  I find this to be one of the strangest beliefs she holds (steadfastly, too) about me.  I was actually paid to be a professional secret keeper (therapist) and am nearly a criminally good liar (best/worst trait?... you decide)... which relies on the ability to keep things under wraps.  And you can't break me.  I should've been an actress.  Anyway, I always think this is a confounding perception.  I don't know if this all stems from the one time I told my brother what he was getting for a present (I was 5-ish?) or if it's because I happily gossip (it's a bonding mechanism) but there is a big difference between that and not keeping a secret.  A secret is a different thing.  I'm a pretty open book regarding my own life... but how would you know what I'm not telling?  Plenty, I assure you. If something is seriously a secret, or is asked to remain as such, it does.  Period.  I lived a whole young life that required a fair amount of covering up in order to fit in, and cover I did.  Hence the being good at both lying and secret keeping.  But whatever.  I don't know why this bothers me... I guess I find it infantilizing.

Mental note: bring this up in therapy this week!

#4  I think we're going to paint the house a dark moss green,
      hopefully that will play off the yellow/tan 60s brick
      in a way that says...
     "Hey, I meant to do that!"  instead of
     "For shame, for shame... look away from that brick."
      You know what I mean.
      The weird pinkish aluminum siding with turquoise trim,
      yellow/tan brick...
      and wait for it....
      hunter green accents...
      was like a quadruple threat of horrible color combinations,
      we're hoping to kind of reverse that now that we have the chance.

#5  I really want summer to be relaxing... but with Safety Town (believe it!), VBS (believe it!) at their new school, and swimming lessons, I'm already feeling nearly as booked as before.

#6 Not missing the TV.  I think I've successfully detoxed. I've been able to watch whatever necessary season finales online, anyway. The only downside is that I don't have anything hooked up to make the treadmill a bearable choice... and Lord knows I need to get back on it... STAT.  On the plus side I've read many o' book in the last couple of weeks including a biography of Eustace Conway... holy crap... how did I not know about this guy?

#7 I'm nervous/excited about this coming Fall.  School starts for the girls in August, and that will be the first time I've ever been childless in 10 straight years (that sounds longer than it feels... I promise) That's a huge change, and I'm really going to miss all of the easy quality time I get to have with them.  (I'm not going to miss all of the difficult times I have with Baby... just sayin')  But I'm also pretty excited that I'll be able to make myself a priority without feeling guilty that I'm taking away from someone/thing else.  One of the hardest things for me, in recent years, has been finding a time to workout that works for me and the family, now I'll be able to workout while Baby is at AM kindergarten. The very notion feels somewhat luxurious.  I have no concept of what it will be like to have a couple of hours to myself everyday.
Weird.
Maybe I'll get some more kids in this house.

Off to go work on our budget.... always good times.


Tuesday, May 15, 2012

What The?!

"Ah! ah! ah!, I don't like it when he bites my nipples!"  Kid yells at the cat while getting dressed.


On the positive side... at least she doesn't like it... right?






Sunday, May 13, 2012

Happy Mother's Day!

First, let me say that I love my kids.  I love that Kid can be so ernest.  (I love that Baby is first and foremost in love with sugar)  This Mother's Day was going to be a bit of a problem, not so much for me, but for Kid.  I knew she had *ideas* about what Mother's Day should be, and would be disappointed if she couldn't carry them out.  I also knew that she really, kind of, couldn't, without adult help, and with Mr F out of town... and her deep desire to *surprise* me... well, I was concerned.  First, you should know that Kid has only recently learned how to use the microwave, and the toaster is still a bit scary.  I tried to think of a way to help... and failing that, I tried to convince them we could go out to brunch (please, please, pretty please...) but to no avail (waa!).  Breakfast in bed is what Kid has written down as Mother's Day law, and ain't nothing going to break that!

So...

I was awoken this morning by Kid hissing through the door to Baby...

"Chars!  Get up!"

I took the opportunity to proclaim my desire to be left to sleep for another half an hour.

5 minutes later, the girls were in my room asking for my phone.

Apparently, when Mr F took them Mother's Day shopping, he did not tell them where he hid the gifts.

I explain that he won't be able to answer his phone, and give them all of my suggestions as to hiding spots.

I hear them, and I feel so badly for them, unable to find the presents and getting worried about a ruined Mother's Day.

(I'm also not so silently cursing Mr F)

I get up and go to the basement to help look.

On my way, I spy a plate of assorted old frozen waffles coated in a thick layer of butter.

While scary, I'm actually pleasantly surprised that Kid was able to scrounge that up, and am somewhat relieved that she found a way to pull off breakfast in bed, as I knew she had desperately wanted to.

After finding the gifts I am told to go back to bed.

Here I am waiting....

I look a little nervous... because I AM.

mmm.... can't wait.

The gingerbread waffle, I know, has been in there since Christmas.

Baby marches in with the sugar bowl...

Just in case the cup of syrup isn't going to be enough sweetener for my tastes.

Then Kid brings in the waffles....

Please look at her!  She's so proud of herself in that moment.

It is so heartbreakingly cute that I'm actually going to eat all of this...

and keep my face from registering shock at how cold they are.

(turns out she microwaved them a good half an hour before serving them...)

mmm.... yummy, yummy.

"Can I have a bite?" Baby asks after I am presented with my plate of cold-ish waffles soaked in a cup of syrup and topped with very generous squirts of whipped cream.

"Sure."  I say.

"That's what I'm having for breakfast!"  Baby exclaims happily.

"We aren't having any breakfast, Chars."  Kid whispers sternly.

(Hands down funniest line of the morning)

Then the girls leave to get the gifts and come back to my bed to present them.

"Here's my card."Baby says handing me a Mother's Day card.

"Oh!  We forgot to write in them!" Kid shrieks, snatching it from my hands.

"What is our problem?!" Kid whispers to Baby as they run down the hall.

(No, wait, that's the funniest line of the morning)

The end.  Next year, should we be Mr F-less on Mother's Day, remind me to hit a bakery the day before so the girls have something easy (and room temp) to plate up for me in the morning.


Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Monday, May 7, 2012

It Might Be Heartbreaking If It Weren't The Most Adorable Thing In The World

Things haven't been going well around here for Baby.

On Sunday, she got off on the wrong foot after an unfortunate incident during her drum solo.


Then in the hammock she asked who wanted to see her trick and Kid said "I'll watch you" but Mr F and I only said "Sure".

"Sure means you don't really want to."  Baby returned glumly.

That was the last straw.... she'd had enough.

She came in and declared she was running away.

Kid tried to talk her out of it.

Baby declared that she's "having bad times and people keep getting her in trouble"

She also suggested that Shel Silverstein was in on the conspiracy...

"Even that guy's mad at me... he's trying to kick me."

Seeing as her efforts weren't working, Kid tried to help her pack accordingly.

Baby came in and hugged Big Boy pitifully and cried and cried very sincere goodbye tears.

I told her she didn't have to leave.  I told her I really didn't want her to runaway.

"I don't want to runaway, but I have to."  Baby sobbed out.

Then she rolled her bags out into the hall...

Then she played a mournful tune on the harmonica...

After much deliberation, we convinced her that moving to China was not as feasible as she had first thought.

On to Plan B...

the living room.

Please take a moment to check out her incredibly well thought out digs...

Here's her bed side table, with her flashlight, framed photo of her sister, and her purses and keys hanging from a purse hanger.  Next to that is a bin with her dirty clothes, then her pjs on top of the chair and clean underwear underneath...


Then to the left is her accessories storage followed by her library on top the chair and her pantry underneath (dried fruit, granola bars, marshmallows and a huge box of Nerds... the essentials)

At the end is her closet with hanging clothes... and hula necklace...



Saturday, May 5, 2012

Whoa... The Doesn't Reflect Well On My Laundry Skills

"Mmm, I love the smell of sheets and cat fur"  Baby announces while taking in a deep inhale of Big Boy.

"Sheets and cat fur?"  Mrs F asks, confused.

"They smell the same?"  Mrs F inquires a little nervously.

"Yeah!"  Baby responds enthusiastically

Friday, May 4, 2012

Still Alive (because after that last one you deserve an update)

Here's the main deal...

Girl Scout camp (which I likened to Guantanamo more than once during my imprisonment) sucked the last living bit of soul I had left right out of me.

Something about the not sleeping for 56 straight hours (wish I was exaggerating) shoved my already fragile state right over the live long edge.

I may or may not have contemplated taking my own life (I'd tell you not to judge me on that, cause I know it sounds crazy-town, but remember that humans are really not constructed to stay awake for 3 days... it will fuck you all kinds of up in the head)

Especially, when you come home and it's Monday and the construction crew shows up and they finish your roof with an extremely NOT straight line.

And when you call the Village to ask where your replacement street tree was, since we were the only house NOT to get one (that they promised to everyone that lost one in the tornado then wrote a whole bunch of self congratulatory statements about how they had done that) I was told that I did get one.  And when I said that they planted it NEXT FUCKING DOOR (minus the fucking... because I'm actually the nicest person in the world to deal with... also not exaggerating... you can make me cry but you cannot ever push me to rudeness... FACT) and not in fact at my house, I got some attitude on the other end of the line.

And, people, PEOPLE... it was just too much.

Plus, Baby is 5 and her first dance recital is being taken as seriously as opening night on Broadway for crying out loud.  And you can't take pictures or video, but have to buy them for $30/each (assholes).  And (AND) there are 3 days of f'ing rehearsals.

And I need to find something called "Suntan" tights... and when I asked what time the recital was and the teacher talked to me like I had Alzheimer's and had told me before (hadn't) that the times will be posted the 1st week of May and it wasn't actually the 1st week yet in a sickeningly sweet tone... well... I just shut down.

I went home, looked at the spot where my tree wasn't... and completely shut down.

Then, of course, I made dinner.

And then I started crying on the inside.

Oh, wait I was going to write about how I'm feeling a bit better.  Oops.

So, miraculously, Mr F was convinced to stay home.  And while I did have to wake him up twice (meaning I did not actually get to sleep in) he did make the kids breakfast and take Baby to swimming (a procedure I kind of dread) and then he took them to Spanish and got them McDonald's for lunch.  Sure I still had to do the homeschooling, and he may have completely forgotten to bring me any lunch home (?!!) but it was still so much less than I usually do that it did help restore a bit of my inner strength.  Which clearly needed some serious restoration work.  I also ordered a week's worth of dinners from one of those make & take dinner places (but it turns out you don't have to make them), and talked myself down from my usual standards and into buying some packaged ready to eat food from the grocery store (ground breaking... I know).

I also found out about this show I can watch on YouTube.

And this blog.  And her honesty about her own hard times makes me feel a little less alone in mine.

And between the two I almost (almost) don't miss TV as much.

Although I still do miss bashing the Pioneer Woman during her cooking show on Saturday mornings.

I don't know why, but it brings Mr F & I closer together.

Mostly because I just don't think you can call yourself an accidental country girl when you married one of the largest land owners in America and you met him at a bar in Oklahoma where you are, incidentally, from.  You know?  It just rubs us the wrong way.  Just say you are a rich cattle rancher's wife with a state of the art kitchen and I'm all in... just don't lie to me.

Don't you lie to me, Ree.

Whoa, that show gets me riled up!  I don't even know where it comes from.  It just bubbles up.

I think that's why Mr F likes to watch it with me.  It brings out the fury he knows and loves.

So does the village tree lady.

But with her it's personal, so it's not nearly as much fun.

P.S. if you CC the tree lady's boss & you explain how not getting the tree you ORDERED planted on your property, when you are already so stressed and beaten down from the tornado and all the repairs and you just want to move forward, is extremely disappointing, you will get a prompt response and a tree by the end of the week.  Just sayin'... do not mess with me, village tree lady... Do. Not. Mess.




Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Mr F Stayed Home Today And That Is Saying Something

It could have to do with finding me keening on the bedroom floor

I'm not doing well, and I'm not in the space to even pretend that I am

the tornado, and the construction, and the insurance fights, and the contractor mishaps, which all result in a needed hypervigilance that I no longer have the energy for

and Mr F left on a business trip to San Francisco, followed directly by his being gone all the following week for 'closing week', then without a breath in between I was sent to girl scout prison camp, and now Mr F is preparing to leave for France...

all tidying up one of the worst months of my life

and I'm still having to do all the stuff, the homeschooling, and cooking, and laundry, and grocery shopping, and bill paying, and construction management

and worrying about the workmanship and the money

and how much I just want to go back in time have this never have happened

and I just don't have anything left inside

when things go bad I'm always left alone

it feels like the most horrifically long fight to the death

and it turns out they're winning

and I'm dying

to top it all off I had the roofers throw away our DirecTV satellite...  and now all I want in the world is to lie on the coach cloaked in a blanket and watching mindless TV

and there is that part of me that always appears competent and on top of things

and so no one sees, not even Mr F

that, really, I need the help

Friday, April 27, 2012

Other Kinds Of Preparedness

Remember when you were younger and you'd pre-drink before heading out to the bar?

I depart for Girl Scout camp in an hour.

And I'm not the driver.

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Severe Weather Preparedness Week

Yep, it is.  Please take a moment to read up, make a plan, and prepare your family.

I wish I had read THIS last year.

There are a lot of things that we had done.  We were pretty well prepared, especially for people that didn't really think we would be hit by a tornado (or anything else). We had a designated safe room (basement bathroom under the stairs... stairs are a reinforced structure).  We had gone to Cabela's and gotten a water storage container, first aid kit, LED laterns, a 72 hour kit, and some extra supplies to round everything out to cover all four of us.  We knew to get everyone in boots, and bike helmets.  When you go through the site you'll discover that most injuries happen AFTER an event, stepping on nails is a big one!  Also a lot of injuries come from flying debris.  The helmets might seem overboard, but a kid actually survived a tornado when he was hit in the head by a flying toilet because he was taught in school to put a helmet on.  It's actually a good idea to cover everyone up in a comforter or under a mattress (bike helmets seems a bit easier than managing that!) if a tornado is headed your way, to help protect you from flying debris.

But there are very important things that I did not know.  I did not know how to turn off our gas... I really wish that I had known how to do that.  I was very worried about an explosion after the tornado hit.  I heard a loud boom from somewhere down the block, then worried that it wasn't safe to stay in our house with the gas on, but didn't think it was safe to stay outside with the trees down & the lightning, etc.  Next time, I would absolutely shut off our electric and gas ASAP.  When you are planning, remember you might be alone!  Everyone needs to know how to do everything... Sure, Mr F knows how to do all of that, it just never occurred to me that I would need to know, too.  And that's how things played out.  And for the record, lots of kids were home from school, with their parents still at work when it hit.  If that is your situation, do your kids know everything they need to know?

We also didn't have a weather radio... we just got a NOAA weather radio from REI that comes on automatically when there is a severe weather alert.  This alert will sound even before the tornado sirens and we can unplug it (it has reserve batteries) and take it down with us so that we know exactly what is going on and when it is safe to come back up.  This would have been helpful to have had at the time (could be lifesaving).  I had heard the sirens and had gone to the basement but I didn't know when the storm was over (we'd lost power) and I came upstairs RIGHT BEFORE the tornado hit the house.  I was very lucky that I got downstairs in time.  I now know, that the tornado actually lifted up the roof directly over where I had been standing in the kitchen just a moment (literally) after I got out of there.  It stills haunts me that I might have made a much bigger mistake, like letting the kids come back up, or going outside to check the sky.

And with that in mind, remember that you will very likely lose power, so be sure you have accounted for that.  Insurance papers a really hard to find IN THE DARK... especially when you never really filed anything since you moved in (oh is that just me?!... trust me, it's done now!).  I'm now going to make copies of that important paperwork and keep it in a waterproof bag in our 72 hour kit. I'm also putting an extra pair of long pants, underwear, socks, and a pair of gardening or work gloves for everyone in a an extra bag to keep in there.  If a tornado hits after you've put kids to bed, they might be in pjs (you might be!) and you'll need some back up clothes on hand (especially if your 2nd story just blew off.. and I wish I was joking... if we didn't have a ranch that may VERY WELL have been the end result).  Do not take the time to find these things after you hear the siren, go immediately to your safe area and stay there!  This is about preparedeness... not last minuteness.

 If you have space, think about storing the things that would be helpful (think camping goods, out of season clothes, etc) near your safe area, if not in it.  Remember you don't really want a ton of stuff in your safe area that could become flying objects in the event of a tornado.  If the power is out, but you know that all of your sleeping bags, rain gear, or whatever else is within easy reach, that makes a lot of sense... do it.  We have a shelving unit outside our basement bathroom, right by our garage door (our basement opens to our garage) and we can keep all our camping stuff there.  We also keep our bike helmets there (this works for us because of it's proximity to our garage, but you might consider buying extra... always handy when friends come over to play anyway!)  We also have hooks right by the door where we store our rain gear.  When we have a tornado warning we don't need to run around looking for that stuff, we keep it right by our safe room, we can pick it up and take it in with us.  If you have a traditional basement set up, maybe think about where you can consistently keep things that you can easily grab on your way down.

Things you will likely need in the immediate aftermath of a tornado, even if you or your house isn't directly hit... boots (debris and flooding), rain gear, flashlights, long pants, gloves, important documents (insurance #!!!).  When we left our house our town was actually barricaded off and we were told we might not be allowed to go back home once we left.  I had not packed accordingly for that! I hadn't taken our paperwork with us, you might need to leave quickly and in the dark, know where things are and take them with you.  You may need to handle things from a different location, and you might have to do it old school (no smartphone to help you out... because you forgot your charger!) so have important phone numbers on hand.  Think about cash... we didn't have any, and our entire town was out of power.  I'll be putting some in our pack!  Also, I saw THIS super cool weather radio that could be recharged either through solar panels or crank operated if needed and which could function as an LED flashlight & charge your phone... I'm totally getting one of those!

One other mistake I made, was to not take this as seriously as I should have, or could have.  I just didn't have the experience to do so.  I've lived my whole life with one or two uneventful tornado warnings every spring...  warnings were always kind of exciting but I never felt real concern.  I came up and down to the basement one million times, getting blankets, movies, stuffed animals, and wrestling the cats (twice), all at the kids request, while the girls stayed in the safe room.  I will never make that mistake again.  When the tornado hit, I knew it, and I knew that if I didn't haul ass my kids might be left down there alone.  It's serious, take it that way.

Basically, my advice is to take it all the way.  Things absolutely can happen to you.  Think about the worst possible case scenario and prepare for that.  Think about all of the things that could happen, not just the event, but the aftermath and go overboard.    Less really isn't more, here.

Oh, and batteries!  Extra batteries!

The end.

Tomato Tomahto

"That's what's great about it!  Usually you have to be super rich to have a vacation home... but because this house is falling down and inhabitable... we can kind of afford it."  Mrs F says to Kid, while perusing foreclosures.

"Um, I don't know if I'd call that a vacation home... more like a 5 foot shack that's a dump hole."  Kid replies unenthused.

Saturday, April 21, 2012

Updates

Well, this week has been productive.

 On Monday evening, Kid noticed some water damage on our kitchen ceiling. I can't believe it... it's been over a month since the tornado, we still haven't had the roof approved, and now we have water damage from the month's worth of spring storms. More stress...and I'm not happy.

 On Tuesday, our local insurance agent came out to see the non-progress on our house, and makes notes so as to try and go over the head of the catastrophic adjuster (that had not yet approved the whole roof replacement).

 (Our local agent did say he was embarrassed to work for State Farm, that the company that can afford Super Bowl ads should not be nickel and diming it's clients over tornado damage, it's not the State Farm he started working with 30 years ago... for what it is worth, drop State Farm like it is hot)

 On Wednesday, Mr F left town for the rest of the week.

 On Wednesday afternoon, the catastrophic adjuster came out to document the new leak (other side of the house from the tree damage... so... we're thinking full roof rip off should be a go... and I should note EVERYONE else has had their entire roof replaced by now). Unbelievably he told me that he wasn't going to approve a new roof, just two patches. I lost my fucking shit... and let him know the level of my disappointment. The man felt my fury. I reminded him that this is not a handout, this is a service we have ALREADY paid for. I may also have shamed him in front of our contractor. Just ask Mr F... I know exactly how to make someone feel like shit, when I need to.

 Magically our roof got approved later that evening.

 On Thursday, contractors came out to assess our driveway damage.

 On Friday, our driveway was repaired and resurfaced, AND our new roofing got delivered. I can't believe it... but it looks like things might finally be heading in the right direction! I'm thinking by the end of next week we might actually have a new roof and new siding (maybe). Then we just need to get all this yard nightmare (huge ground stump piles, holes in yard, mud problems, etc., dealt with).

 On Friday evening, my mom came down and took the girls and I out to dinner. That was good, since I was kind of at a "Mr F is out of town/the insurance guy is a dick/I can't believe I need to have my kitchen ceiling fixed now" exhaustion overload point... and she had a surprising amount of awesome gossip to share, which is always rejuvenating.

 On Saturday, I decided to stop neglecting my diet and exercise (obviously, I needed to alleviate a fair amount of house stress before I could reach this point). I worked out for 80 minutes, made some grain free choc chip cookies (surprisingly good), and have kept under 1200 cal. I really need to do this, and get myself back on my radar.

I've had a very hard time since moving back to MI making myself a priority and sticking with it. I'm actually looking forward to the kids starting school in the Fall, since I'll finally have time for working out without feeling guilty about it. It will be the first time in 10 years that I'll have a couple of hours to myself.

 And now Mr F has returned.

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Uh... That's Not What I Said

"Hey, can you go tell Dad that I have a migraine and he needs to get some dessert going?" I ask Kid.

"Dad, Mom said she has a migraine and you need to get dessert ready!" Kid dutifully yells.

"Time to get some fucking dessert in my tummy!" Baby hollers after her.

Saturday, April 14, 2012

It Turns Out...

I don't really enjoy managing all the clean up/restoration work that has been going on for the past month.

In fact, I find dealing with all of the contractors, subcontractors, laborers and the whole insurance component to be one of the most stressful jobs I've had to undertake.

I don't think, even if I did get to control the timeline, cost, or work being done, I'd enjoy this.

The reality is that I don't get to control any of the above, and well... I pretty much hate it.

Insurance is the final word, and "you get what you get and you don't throw a fit".

It's all of the negatives of a major home renovation, with absolutely none of the positives.

Put all that stress right on the back of the most traumatic event in my life...

(just because you live through something, does not mean you think you will at the time... and that took a pretty serious psychological toll on me and I'm still working through that, not to mention the PTSD that makes sleeping nearly impossible... as I'm always listening for wind... or just dealing with regular weather patterns without anxiety.. it's hard)

and... I'm at my breaking point.

It just seems unfair that you have to live through both the destruction and then the construction.

Of course, Mr F is rarely here... wasn't here when it hit and is not here for the construction.

It's a lot to manage on my own.

And I've passed my ability to handle it well.
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