Saturday, February 26, 2011

Caffeine- (and excellent companionship) induced epiphanies

After I got home and stepped out of the bath at almost 3 am, Ken gravely assured me that he would have picked me up if I had called. We bantered about the correct pronunciation of "timbre". I asked him what's my job. He asked me what's his (sound engineer). Perhaps my siblings and I should offer our services for verbal assault -  injury by sarcasm or acid tongue.

Had a zoom-out moment when I realised how myopic I had been and how to look past the temporary fatigue and stress. Sometimes I feel as short-sighted as 湘琴 from 惡作劇之吻. Must always remember 直樹's words - 没飞得那么高, 怎么看得远?

"So you want to change the world. What are you waiting for?"
- Lindsay Lohan: What Are You Waiting For
The question is, though, do I want to change the world?

I've been like a doll in a doll-catching machine, just lying there until someone takes me or passes me on and, very luckily, puts me in all the right places that turned out to be better for me so far. Job-wise and even for FYP. So very thankful.

Very pleased that I can still find time to entertain and enrich myself with good books during this period. Love this satiated feeling!

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Morphus put your sanity in jeopardy @ 3:32 AM  

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Monday, February 21, 2011

Clocks

When I see round clocks which have a circular scar on their faces, injured by the second hand scratching its way across time, I wonder if one day part of the glass would drop out if enough time passed, and the scratches were deep enough.

They say time heals. Today I envisioned the key to releasing oneself from the chains of pain, or guilt, or grief, being in one such round clock with a scar on its face - one day the second hand would cut a hole on its face, just like a laser, except in ever-so-slow motion, and you would be able to reach in and take the key which was in plain view all the time - you just couldn't reach it until the time was ripe. And until you're ready to knock on the glass.

Morphus put your sanity in jeopardy @ 11:25 AM  

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Tuesday, February 08, 2011

Epiphany No. 48



What you want comes along when you're not expecting it. :D

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Morphus put your sanity in jeopardy @ 1:10 AM  

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Thursday, February 03, 2011

It's complete!!!



Finally!!! After throwing away loads of stuff, racking my brains to clear more space and figure out how to display the items...the sense of accomplishment is really worth it. ^_^

I feel a bit guilty about throwing away so much stuff (like all those expensive textbooks!) to have a more spacious room, but right now I'm glad I did so cos my table and cd shelf have so much more space! I resolve to keep them as neat and uncluttered for at least a month!

Morphus put your sanity in jeopardy @ 2:45 AM  

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Wednesday, February 02, 2011

Wabbit!

Next year is supposed to be my year. Hopefully that bodes very well indeed.

Some wishes:

  1. That it will be a truly happy CNY
  2. That my loved ones will sail through it safely, happily and healthily
  3. That if a metamorphosis is required for my career, that this metamorphosis will be successful in opening new doors while being as painless as possible
  4. That FYP will conclude without any further ado or crises
  5. That I may take life with a pinch of salt when needed, and always live in the present
  6. I won't ask for 桃花, because the 桃花 predictions are always way off for me, but I do wish for some...healthy traffic - dust is settling on my road to romance.
  7. That I will count my blessings more often
  8. That I will remember all the things I anticipate, and continue to feel that little buzz for everything on that list
HUAT AH!

Morphus put your sanity in jeopardy @ 1:14 PM  

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Tuesday, February 01, 2011

My ego takes a backseat for once.

In the midst of my spring-cleaning, I keep getting distracted, gripped by this overwhelming urge to flip through a lot of my stuff and be lost in the memories.

I was surprised to find this still in my possession:


You see, I usually don't keep such students' essay compilations unless my work is included - which it seldom is, because the best students need the encouragement less. No, really. =p But even that knowledge never stopped me from trying to write one so good that they'd have no choice but to include it. It never worked, though. So I throw them away ASAP to prevent any ego bruising.

A quick scan of the contents page confirmed my suspicions - no sign of my name. Humph.

Puzzled, I went through the name list again, slowly this time.


Aha.

Feel free to ask me for the book if you all feel the need to revisit your secondary school work. ;)

*Edit: I just found a compilation published the year after. Finally, my essay was published. But it was alongside TWO of Leong's essays and one of Cheryl's. And one from this guy I still regard with much contempt. WTH! Ok ok I shan't be so calculative. *breathes deeply*

Morphus put your sanity in jeopardy @ 9:27 PM  

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Rain is art

The streetlight illuminates the raindrops, making it look as if it's only raining under the light. Private rain. Private pain. Is that what heartbreak feels like?

***

Random thought: I wonder if things would have turned out differently if you didn't drive, and we had to take the bus home together everytime...

***

The rain made everything magical. After its cleansing, the gleaming floor shone under the moonlight, a mirror for the lights - so many, and so colourful - making Orchard Road look innocent, beautiful. I sat at Coffee Club, with lovely company, transfixed by Shaw House's giant screen, and felt like I could never leave this country.

***

I've loved everything about the rainy spell these few days. Waking up to the cold air teasing my feet back under the sheets, pulling my comforter closer around me, so warm and cosy. Bargaining with the alarm clock half-heartedly, because I don't have to wake up right now (don't punch me), winning, drifting back to sleep with an easy smile on my face, repeat till I'm ready to start the day. Is this what it's like, waking up in love, happy from the moment your eyes open, only your brain switches on, and you remember - oh, the gloriousness of it all - that you belong with this amazing person? 

And the constant air-con temperature. Weather has a way of making me feel like it's always been like this and it always will be. Very 理所当然 - why not sun one minute and rain the next? Nothing needs to make sense. It sneaks up upon you, forces you to accept it, get used to it, dress for it, and then it goes away as quickly as it came, on its every whim, making you feel stupid and sweaty in your suddenly-inappropriate clothes. No wonder Man wants to control it.

Watching the rain start and stop, start and stop, throughout the day, as I go about my daily activities. Seeing the world drenched in little raindrops every time I look out the window, breathing in the clean, clean air, feeling the little breezes lift and fade, lift and fade. Knowing that it's so cold out, I won't sweat even if I start spring-cleaning. Somehow it makes other tasks a little less daunting as well - a nice change from the cloying humidity.

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Morphus put your sanity in jeopardy @ 2:23 AM  

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