"Dark and difficult times lie ahead."
Sorry for the looooooong absence. 2 weeks, I believe.
Ah well.
Went to watch Kenneth's concert last Wednesday. He was one of two emcees and also a performer. He really sounds like the regular guy-emcee, I was surprised to find. I don't know why I was surprised. Maybe cos he doesn't usually talk like that. Anyway he performed a hip hop dance with a few of his mates (including 2 girls!!! so rare to see girls doing hip hop). I knew he was interested in hip hop, but I never dreamed that he would be able to pull off all those moves with those loooooooong legs (he is 1.8++m). I mean, don't they get in the way? He did a few breakdancing moves, too. Never been more proud. Please feel free to tease him about this the next time you see him, Ro.
There was this line from the script he said during the emcee-ing. The other emcee asked him if he was close to his family. He replied "Yes. In fact, they're here today, so you can ask them if you don't believe me." or something like that. I know, it's a script, but I can't help wondering if he really meant it and if he really does feel close to his family, to us. I mean, I wanted to talk to him after the concert but he was off celebrating with his friends. Naturally. And I hardly ever see him nowadays. When I'm back from work, he's not back yet from frolicking outside. And when he's back, I'm asleep and the doors are closed anyway so there's already that barrier. We used to have heart-to-heart talks. It really didn't seem like so long ago. Now I'm thinking maybe we will only talk to each other if we are on vacation and stuck together in a "restricted" space for a few days. And that's sad.
Been blogging very little because a) much of my life, very sadly, is now taken up at work, which is too risky to blog about, and b) because of a), I don't have much of a life. I mean, I sleep by 10 pm everyday and wake up at 6 am. Yeah, I know, when was the last time you slept at 10 everyday right. It's so...routinised! I take the same train (well, almost. my stupid bus is very unpredictable), take the same shuttle bus driven by the same uncle, see pretty much the same people on board the bus, work on the same things for a few days, think the same murderous thoughts, have the same fantasies about when my internship finally ends...sigh. I really can't imagine doing this for the rest of my life. Only holding on to my sanity by way of wonderful colleagues, and weekly outings with my friends.
2 days ago I was very happy (for the first time) because I thought my work life was finally getting better. 1 day ago I was dropped with a bombshell first thing in the morning. And it's horrible, terrible. I sat at my desk and tried not to cry. The highlight of the day kept me going and cheered me up, but after that it was down in the doldrums again. I feel so scared and worried now. Sigh. Why why why must this happen.
Dark and difficult times lie ahead. Right after christmas, too. Bah. Someone help me find a silver lining that outshines everything else. Please.
