The purpose of this reflection is not to take a stroll down the memory lane of time keeping. It is an attempt to reflect on the meaning of time in an epoch that is obsessed with speed and where time is commoditized. We often hear phrases like “time is of the essence” and “time is money”. These are but examples of how we have made time into a form of currency. Sometimes literally. There’s a report about the selling of microseconds and milliseconds to stock market traders for millions of dollars (Lapham). Saving time has become a multi-million dollar growth industry. Whether it is automation, multipurpose devices or computerization, the purpose is to save time. The drive to save time doesn’t stop at the boundaries of the corporate world. It invades our personal lives—both our relationships and routines. Written letters is replaced by SMS, social media and the telephone. Routines are simplified by microwave ovens, robotic vacuum cleaners, coffee machines, pack out food, to name but a few.
Before I’m labeled as a Luddite, let me emphaize that I’m not against technology per se. So many inventions have brought us comfort and eliminated numerous tedious tasks. Life has been made simpler and easier. However, everything comes with a price. The question that begs to be answered is what have we sacrificed to gain extra time and what do we do with the time we have saved. The question is not whether these technologies are good or bad; the lynchpin of the issue turns on how they are used.
I believe that deeply nuanced relationships is the main aspect of life that we have given up as a result of the way we use time saving technology. True and meaningful relationships are forged through engaging in tasks together, conversing face to face and being present to each other. It develops and deepens with time and constant contact. When we speed things up and resort to instant technology, we reduce the opportunities and amount of time spent and doing tasks together and the bonds that develop as a result of conversations. A very good example is family meals that have evolved from a time where family members exchange stories about their days or discuss personal issues to one where we eat as quickly as we can so that we can return to our own activities. This phenomenon is also the manifestation of radical individualism that we will return to later.
Granted that modern technology like Skype and FaceTime connects geographically separated loved ones and extend our social network. How many of these people we know online are actually people we can truly call our friends? We may receive updates on what’s current in their lives, like them and leave comments, but is that true conversation? It lacks depth, presence and is not sustained. Social media hollows out and flattens conversations into snippets and sound bites. There is no sustained exchange of feelings, ideas and arguments that is possible through personal contact or through letter writing. Even though we have e-mails, more often than not they are impersonal and merely extensions of social media.
Another phenomenon that arises from social media is individualism that alters the contours of community. Communities now transcend geographical boundaries via avenues like virtual chat rooms, forums and groups. The already contentious definition of what constitutes communities is further stretched by technology. My purpose is not to dig into this multi-faceted subject. The point I want to put forward is that the advent of virtue communities weakens communal rootedness and spirit. Physical communities are increasingly becoming fragmented as people interact behind the veil of technology. Communication can be done in private or even anonymously. This changes the dynamics of communication radically as face-to-face conversations differ greatly from digital conversations, which are detached and depersonalized.
Digital communication has a democratizing effect that does away with the need for commitment unlike a physical community into which we are born into and have limited choice. We can join or withdraw from any online community without any residual impact and with just a click of a button. There’s little need for rootedness and loyalty. It does not require commitment—if it becomes uncomfortable we can just choose to leave. We can also afford to be reckless and rude (hence the term flaming) as we hide behind a virtual persona. This is not so with physical communities where it is messy, organic and governed by certain social conventions. Don’t you think it is harder to be impudent when you speak directly to someone as compared to posting online?
Once again, I’m not against digital communication as it allows new ways of knowledge dissemination (e.g. crowd sourcing). I’m concerned about its impact on the way we now relate to the people around us. Not just our family and friends, but to our extended family, neighbors and society at large. We are increasingly alienated, distanced and distracted from the people around us as we sink deeper into the mud of personal technologies. In other words, with facebook, twitter, and smartphones, we are so absorbed and entertained that we no longer need others. How often do we see families and friends sitting together, mesmerized by a disembodied virtual environment on their smartphones, tablets and computers? It has reached epidemic proportions and is extremely alarming.
The common understanding that technology helps us save time for the people we treasure is a modern myth. As argued above, it not only altered the way we communicate but also the way we live. Instead of freeing up time from tedious and routine tasks, technology has insidiously spread its net over the rest of our time, absorbing us into the world of endless information and entertainment. Thus far, it sounds as though technology is to be blamed for our current malaise. However, we mustn’t be too quick to put all the blame on technology, though it is partially a culprit (more on that in a while). The main issue at hand is the way in which we use these technologies and allowed them to shape our lives. We have become too passive. Instead of leveraging on technology to foster closer ties, we have allowed it to replace physical presence. It is a vicious cycle: as we delve deeper into our smartphones, we find it difficult and awkward to maintain a sustained and meaningful conversation, and in return we immerse ourselves deeper into technology to save us from the agony of awkwardness. With this downwards spiral, relationships and conversations wither and flattens outs.
As with any issue, there’s always another side to the problem. For the subject matter at hand, it is the peculiar nature of technology that is culprit. Neil Postman traces the development of the newspaper and the television as cultural medium that do not promote sustained and concentrated engagement. Imagine having a mixed bag of unrelated information neatly organized in rows and columns on newspapers and popular magazines? Or unrelated television programs? We live in this media era. How does that cultivate the ability for sustained engagement on a particular topic or issue? Postman’s insight is especially pertinent today as the internet is more fragmented than the newspaper or television. At the very least, newspapers and magazines contained distilled and crystallized information; for the internet, it is fraught with disconnected data and information not properly organized. There are also videos, podcasts, MTVs and other forms of multimedia that adds to the distraction. This might be a strawman argument, but more often than not, do we use the internet for sustained engagement or for entertainment and distraction? The internet milieu in which we live today creates a social landscape that molds the way we relate to one another. We are so distracted by what’s on the internet that there’s no time for flesh and blood people.
Together, an uncritical use of technology and the formative nature of technology combine to create what we see today. They mutually reinforce each other, becoming increasingly tightly intertwined. If we want to redeem relationships, we have a lot of unlearning to do. There’s firstly the need to be extremely critical about the way technology shapes our lives. We need to be cognizant about its influence in order to develop a course of action to reverse this trend. In order to mitigate the fragmenting tendencies of these devices, we need to restore a strong and nurturing physical community in which we are rooted and sustained. We need to recover what it means to be meaningfully connected to people. There is an urgent need to recover a more holistic understanding of relationships—one that respects the other as fearfully and wonderfully made, an entity created in the image of God and is deserving of our attention and love. Respect and love in any relationship involves taking the other person in a serious, lighthearted and joyful manner—wanting to develop companionship and an interest in that person. The way to do this is fraught with difficulties as we are losing the language, imageries and resources of doing so. We have been so saturated in media newspeak that we need to have our imaginations recaptured by a new source—namely the biblical view of how God relates to His people.
The relationship between God and His people hasn’t been an easy one. One party is idolatrous, running after other lovers, stubborn, faithless and stiff-necked. However, God continues to pursue His people: punishing but always forgiving them, putting up with their grumblings and finally dying for them. Reconciliation occurs when the first party (God) made the first move. This model lays out a blueprint which we can use to model our relationships with those around us. We need to make the first step in reaching out and be prepared to be patient as the other party takes time to reciprocate. It is a relationship of self-giving and serving. This is the foundation upon which we can build meaningful and deep relationships. This will prove difficult in a culture of instant gratification. Deep relationships don’t blossom overnight. It must be nurtured in love, respect, patience and commitment. There must be sustained conversations, even doing things together. There’s definitely much more to relationship building than can be discussed in this short essay, but it is hoped that this will be a springboard for us to reflect deeper on our relationships and how we can treasure, build and deepen them.
