I agree whole heartedly, in fact I have been contemplating for weeks on getting my fifth. But, pay up for building fund first, best friend's belated present second, then tattooing last!

Moving on to my main, something impacted me today.

Some of you would know of the Talents' Inc thingy which I am involved in, the one which Pst Tan gave my number to, and the same one which I complained endlessly about the modeling classes. Anyways, quite clear to see, I was never too keen on this. Today I was supposed to have a casting for Lipton, my name was among the few to be shortlisted by the client, however, I was simply not interested. Thus I chose to tell them I couldn't make it, which was slightly true as well because of my alternative plan.

Then in the evening, the talents' inc people had a gathering. Raymond, who is an experienced actor/model was sharing his story with us today. He had a casting today as well for a role for an upcoming show on Channel U, the panel then asked him about his life, and he begin telling them about his past, etc. The presence of God then fell as the panel got moved to tears! They then told Raymond that he will not be given the role he was originally casting for, but they are going to cast him in his own life story!!!! So he is meeting up with Diana Ser to come up with the script! Amazing right!

Raymond then went on to share about why we are doing this. Are we here to become famous? Or to achieve a standing in the industry for us to better impact others. He questioned us, what is our attitude when we get called up for castings, what is our motive, what is our end goal. I then thought to myself, the reason why I am so lackluster in this is really because I do not have a vision, a goal. The only reason I keep reminding myself of is just so I won't let Pst Tan down, and that motivation will not bring me far.

Many girls will kill to be in my position, to be given the opportunities that fell to my lap. However, instead of seizing them and making the best out of it, I treat them as a chore. Neither do I take this seriously, nor do I choose to improve. Yes, I may not have the best self-esteem, being with the other girls does at times make me wonder what does Pst Tan see in me. However for the fact that Lipton shortlisted me and a few others among the girls, still I chose to toss it away, is really a reflection of my attitude. I don't even bother trying!

Anyways, on my way home after our dinner, I was very convicted. Thus I have decided, I am going to take this more seriously. I will change for the better. Siew Yan have been complaining about my messy hair for the longest time! I will do something about it! Genecia have been saying I need to dress up more and carry myself better, I will do that. Make up has got to improve, I need to start caring about the way I look, the way I dress, the way I carry myself! If I need to take better portfolio shots, so be it! If I got to lose weight, I'm in!

I want to make full use of this opportunity, I want to be involved in this project God has planted in our church. Whatever gifts God has given to me, I want to multiply them and use them to impact others. If multiplying means to tone up, to look better, to improve myself, to wear heels more often, I will.

The whole new Kayla. I'm sorry for the attitude I was bearing before. This is not about me, not about me rolling my eyes, but I ought to look further than that. Me rolling my eyes about these kinda stuff is really an insult to God. God gave the looks and talents to these girls, and these girls are polishing the gifts and using them to impact others! But what have I been doing with my gifts? It is an insult to God if I choose to ignore my gifts. Come on! The Pst I love most threw this opportunity at me, how much easier can it get?! Yet I was so THICK to see the hand of God, and chose to stick to my old mindset.

There. Out of my system.


Although my hols have started, I am fully booked for the next two weeks already. With Orientation on Tuesday, Dodgeball event on Thursday, Parry walk event on Friday, I have loads of planning to do this week! Plus I am back being more involved with Hospitality, and yes, I finally spoke to Laura today and have returned to the council. Just like the prodigal son. Hoho. (Although I attempted tempting Laura to be rebellious and let us both resign from our positions and watch council survive without us. HEH.) No I'm not being haughty here, you should hear what have been going on in the council with this new batch. But that is for another time, plus talking about council is a sensitive topic, for me. Oh! And Talents' Inc next class (Hosting) is starting this week. I thank God for a new mindset as I embrace this!

Bring it on!

Muahaha.

I am feeling frustrated, but am lazy to talk about it because I AM SOOOOOOO ADDICTED TO THIS SONG!!!

Now you're coming down to earth
Okay, Hello..

(at coldplay's gig!!!)

GOOD MUSIC GETS ME SOOOO HIGGGGGGH!!

Meeting Kev and Diana for overnight studying in a bit! And Germs! I still love you bro! Don't worry! Supper supper!

Oh and Kev says that I am very tomboyish and uncouth when I'm in school! Different from how I look if I bother to dress up.


SHEESH.



(Ohh wow. Nokia latest music phone came up with this promotion. Trade in your mp3 player for their phone, no contract needed. How clever! Ambitious, but very clever! Plus to entice people to even consider giving up their mp3s for this, they offer a one year free unlimited download of songs from their Nokia music store! Cool!)