0 posts for the past one month ... Guess i gotta get my form back on.

A recent incident induced my half-dead brain cells with a chain of thoughts about life and how fragile life can be ....

One of my friends, who used to play TCG (Trading Card Games), with the group of us, suddenly passed away due to a heart attack. It all happened so suddenly, we even tried to call him 2 days before the incident... And 2 days later... this happens...

I'm using past tenses to describe him again..heh.. ironically....A week ago, we were still talking about him in present tenses.. The familiar feeling suddenly strike me yet again.. like during the previous incidents... the feeling of fear .. fear of death.

I know it's kinda normal to fear death.. I just couldnt help but keep thinking about how fragile life can be, after having all those tragics happening around me for the past few years. How can someone be there, and then suddenly cease to exist a few days later.

Those were few of the stuff that were running thru my mind for the past few days.. Guess i'll have to sort all of these thoughts all over again, like what i did the previous times.

And lastly i just want to say: "Rest in peace Vince ... You'll always be remembered."

..... I took the longer way back home yet again ... As i walked through the dimly lighted streets with my uneven pace of steps, i thought about the words that my friends had earlier offered me.

"Was i really running away from reality ?".... "Was i really using my sickness as an excuse for everything ?", those we're the questions that ran through my mind at that very moment. I was certain that my answer for both of them was a "No..". How can i run away from reality when this "sickness" of mine has already taken away everything from me... the sports i play .... the places i was able to go ... the food i used to enjoy .... and the resolution i made 4 years back .... to find my "other-half"..

If you think im gay, homo or whatever, i can firmly tell you that, i'm NOT (although i may act like one sometimes....zzz). The truth is ... i've been waiting for this "someone" for around 7 years, and this is only part of the reason on why i'm still single. The main reason would be.... my "sickness"...

I don't want to drag my supposedly "other-half" down together with me due to my current situation, like how i drag my family down... I can't afford to have another person to be dragged down by me .............

Earlier on, at the beginning of the year, i made the same resolution i made 4 years back, thinking that i would have recovered by this year. However, i don't think i can fufill this anymore. Thats why i making my "mid-year resolution" now...

My "mid-year resolution" is .......... to get myself well again..

My pink IC that is....

Arghhhh... was supposed to ORD yesterday, dont think im able to collect my precious pink IC by this week ..arghhh

Anyway, sorry for the lack of updates recently ... was too caught up with playing Last Chaos recently. Nothing much happened these few days, except for maybe today (yes, today..as in Thursday today). Gonna venture into the camp ..yet again.. to try retrieve my precccccious pink IC. *Prays hard*

Will update the blog again today (Yes ! Today as in Thursday Today !)... It's way pass 12 midnite now.... gonna go rest... thats all for my short short post for today...Zzzz

My right hand and arm are practically shaking now as im typing...zzz..Reason ? I'll explain it later....

Today, went out for dinner with Xinmin, Wee Meng, Daniel, Jowena and Cedric and century square.. after which, we went for a walk around the shopping malls. The guys bought a web cam and a dvd-rewritable disc at Challenger. The others, like me, well.. just tagged along lol.

After the walk, we went to Century square's arcade for some weekly "zombie shooting session" at the "House of The Dead 4" (HoTD4) machine. zzz this was when my right arm got "injured". Was playing half way through when this kid (maybe around 10-12 years of age ?) came along.. and joined in the shooting frenzy..zz was planning to break my personal record of 51 Perfect shots per stage..zzz... But to make things worse, that particular little boy didnt seem very enthusiastic when playing the game.. I had to do all the shaking (Shaking as in shake the gun to break free from the zombified minions...) and shooting. And as a result, i strained my right arm..and not only that... i didnt made it past Stage 2 of the game T_T ...Wasted my 2 bucks......Arrrrrrrgggggghhhhhhhhhhh

Anyway, enough of my day of adventure, i've updated the Radio Blog with another one JPop song:

1) Puzzle by ROUND TABLE feat. Nino (Opening for the anime- Welcome to the NHK)

A song with a catchy tune.. Enjoy ~ :)

Geez... weather is getting worse nowadays.. especially today.. hot,warm and humid. And it had to be the day when i had to go back camp.

Was interesting though, got to see my old colleagues there, hung around with them awhile, then went over to the HQ to do some clearance. Finally got the signature from the al'mighty T.O (Training Officer). 1 down, 1 more to go...zzz

After a "hectic" (was running up, down and all over the place looking for ppl to do my clearance) day at camp, i headed back home after buying dinner for my whole family. Strangely, my legs automatically carried me, across the road and to the void deck of "her" place of residence. And yes, "she", just lives a few blocks away from my house. Looked around at the open-air badminton court where we and the rest of our friends once had our weekly badminton meetings as secondary school students. I Thought to myself about how it is that 2 friends can become total strangers, due to the words and actions done by a single, idiotic person...

Guess there's no use tinking about the past mistakes done .... right ?