someone told me I should continue to write, whatever it is. I tell myself I should be doing it too because, I love writing. sincerely, I do. the problem is, I don't write as well as I used to (not that I wrote like Shakespeare or Hemingway or Frost before). ideas don't flow out as beautifully. my language's a mess. my motivation's affected. distractions, there are more of those than inspirations. there are ideas of course but to pen them out, it's just so difficult. people sometimes look down on writers. yes, they don't make as much money (unless you're Rowling) as other jobs but it is JUST as difficult: coming up with stories people would read and not getting bad reviews of, living up to expectations; yes, writers have to do that because if they don't live up to expectations, people won't read their piece. so there is a whole lot of stress, burden and responsibility a-not-so-successful writer has to carry (mostly self-inflicted) because it is difficult to write. it bloody hell is. it's not like you could consistently write good things every single day, every single moment. I think some people have that general idea about writers-that ideas, words and sentences just flow out of their brains like a river flowing into the sea. well, some days, things do work out that way but most days, the water gets walled-up because a damn has been built in the brain so thoughts, their flow become more controlled and they don't flow as freely and beautifully. you must be reading, "but what I'm reading, you wrote, so why can't you produce some more of this?" well I could, but I won't like it because I just think it's not good enough. the reason why I'm writing this is because honestly, I'm getting frustrated with myself for my inability to write something good and my inability to come up with something great and catchy and different. I keep telling myself, "you need to write some more. you can write bout this and that and you can and you have to." but then again I've learned that forcing myself ain't gonna work. so I need a new strategy, of which I haven't figured out what just yet. hopefully it'll come, and hopefully I can come up with something different and good, just to boost my morale in regards with my writing ability. I'm not good, but I want to be better.
p.s: I've just got to have faith in myself, and push myself.
