It is pretty weird to think that we have a kindergartener now. The whole month leading up to her first day Madie was, I think, quite apprehensive, but excited. She tends to stress a lot about the unknown--I guess many of us do though. The "orientation" night was helpful--she met her teacher and the other kindergarten teachers. She got to explore her classroom and the playground. They even took all the kids on a bus ride around town while the parents met in the cafeteria to talk about policies and procedures.
That was the last Wednesday in August. The next Tuesday, school started. Mike spent all morning trying to snap shots of Madie on her first day of school--he must have taken at least 10. He insisted to her it was a tradition that would be carried on. I kept telling him to leave her alone about it and I would get one later. He even tried getting one in the car--yeah, great way to keep the tradition alive, honey.
As it turned out, I did get the best shot, and it was exactly what I thought it would be:
An unsmiling, but not frowning Madie, 'caught off-guard at the door. I consider this a triumph. Madie is an interesting kid as far as photos are concerned. My older sister hates photos, and always has as far as I can remember. I on the other hand would pose and smile unceasingly. Madie falls somewhere in between. There are times when she's actually asked me to take a photo of her, but it has to be some sort of occasion or some funny thing she wants to be able to look at. When she learned to cross her eyes it was, "Here! Take a picture!" When we went out on a girls' night, just the two of us, and I suggested a selfie of us, she quickly and willingly obliged.
 |
| Look at her go! |
Something other people feel is an occasion (i.e. first day of school, or even First Day of School) she may whole-heartedly disagree with. Especially if she's busy feeling anxious about it, which is understandable.
Dropping her off was hard--for her I mean. I had told her I would pick her up after lunch the rest of the week if she wanted, but I really wanted her to try the first day all the way through. Frankly, all-day kindergarten is crazy to me. I know, I know, it saves working parents a heap in childcare, but you know, both parents have been working for generations, and somehow it's been manageable. Regardless though, I wanted her to experience a full day's routine and then decide if it would be too much. The only way I could convince her to stay is if Finn and I joined her for lunch. Then I said, if she really wanted to go home, I would take her home.
We arrived for lunch and it was, again, what I expected.
"I want you here, but go eat at a different table."
"Uh, no. If we're eating here, we're eating at your table."
"But I want to eat with my friends." (This is a typical Madie answer. She's really not gifted with problem-solving skills.)
"Madie, look at these tables. There is plenty of room for me and Finn to eat with you and at least 10 of your friends."
She spent a lot of time looking around, another typical Madie behavior. Of course, it didn't help that one of the kids had a breakdown over some applesauce on the school's lunch tray. It also didn't help that Madie knew the girl from preschool. She kept asking, "Why is L crying?" The response in my head was something along the lines of, She cried like every day in preschool, so why is this surprising? but I answered with, "Well, the first day of school is a lot for a little kid and apparently having applesauce has sent her over the edge." Heaven knows I totally understand a small thing being the last straw--at the end of the day if one of the kids doesn't want to brush his/her teeth, Mommie Dearest emerges.
The child with the hardest adjustment has been Finn, though. I was surprised by this. He has always been better at entertaining himself than Madie. Madie is extremely social, and isn't really interested in playing most things without a friend. If I would sit and play with her, she'd be at the dollhouse all day. Unfortunately, I am awful at imaginative play, and can only take about ten minutes before I feel like my brain is melting. Finn, on the other hand, will disappear for fifteen minutes and I'll go in search of him and find he's happily playing trucks in his bedroom. But losing Big Sis was a real blow.
By Friday I realized I really needed to find some friends for Finn--he has some at church, but most of them don't live all that close. He also plays well with some kids in the area, but I don't know their parents all that well, so I have no way of contacting them for a play-date. So we went to a playground Friday morning hoping to catch some kids. As luck would have it, we found three! Two moms and their two toddlers were playing and a baby was observing from the sling on him mother's chest. Finn had brought his truck and tractor and ran over to the younger of the two toddlers and handed him one and sat down to play. They played for maybe fifteen minutes together before the mothers decided to head home--they'd already been there an hour by the time we got there. As they drove off, Finn watched and said, "Kids go home?" It was almost heartbreaking. We played some together at the playground, and he enjoyed swinging for a while.
But we only lasted another ten minutes or so before he became obviously bored.
 |
| He was literally hanging over the edge of the swing like this. I kept asking him if he was tired, but he kept shaking his head no. Finally he said, "Mumma, Finn, go home." |
It was so sad for me. I'm actually glad I put Madie in this year, so Finn and I can have just a little time before baby 3 shows up. I didn't realize how dependent he was on friends and how few real friends he has accessible to him.
The next week was a little better--a little boy Alvin was visiting his grandma, my friend Liza, and after one nursery session at church on Sunday, Finn was totally sold on this kid. The next Monday we had set up a playdate at the playground with Liza and some other friends and Finn talked all morning about going to see "Awfin" at the park. He still mentions it sometimes when we get in the car to go see friends. He'll ask if Alvin will be there, and I'll explain that Alvin doesn't actually live here, but Liza said he and his parents are planning to come back for Christmas this year (a rare treat--we usually lose Liza to them!) so hopefully they'll be reunited.
Other things Finn is really enjoying are walks. He is usually up for a walk any time with just me or me and Elvis, but he really looks forward to walks with my friend Trish.
 |
| Peeking through his stroller during a rest on a walk with Elvis. There are three houses being built along our usual route, so we have to stop and watch them all. |
Another thing we've been doing lately--especially if it's cold or Trish can't join us for a walk--is going to the YMCA. We get there after dropping Madie off about ten minutes before the babysitting opens up, so we go shoot around in the gym. Finn's a great sportsman. He can dribble a full-sized basketball quite well considering it comes up to his knee when it's just sitting on the floor. He can drop-kick a soccer ball, throw and catch a frisbee, and has an excellent pitch--on target and long-distance (or long for a 2-year old). It's been nice for me too, to spend time doing something I really enjoy with my son. Although he always wants me to pick him up so he can shoot into the basket. That was hard enough before I was pregnant, but now I really just can't do it at all.
When the sitter gets there, he gets to play with her and some other kids he has known since last year while I walk the track. It's a win-win.
Over all, this past month has been good. We are now in a good place with both kids. Madie has ridden the bus home twice and she and Anna (the girl who carpools with us) will ride to school tomorrow morning. I'll mostly still drive them, at least in the morning, but they need to get used to it for when the baby is first here. Here are some triumphs for this past month:
-We have avoided all first-of-school illnesses! YESSSSS!
-Finn has fully adjusted (this past week was the best!) and with story-time starting up again at the library, we'll be seeing even more friends more often!
-Madie is taking piano again with some kids at the church (I'm teaching) every week and although she hates leaving school early for it, she is enjoying time with her friend Noah and seems to be taking more of an interest in piano.
