how are love and beauty faring?

The Myth of Progress

Wendell Berry

The myth of progress substitutes infinite advance toward better and better life in the material sense for the old pilgrimage, which you make by effort and grace, to become a better person. That's the reason you need to subvert it if you can. It takes people's minds off the important things. It becomes a kind of determinism: All we have to do is just passively go along and things will get better and better, and we'll be happier and happier. That's why we need honest accounting.

What is the measure of progress? It is possible to measure the progress of the last 200 or 300 years in soil erosion. We can measure it in the rate of species extinction. We can measure it in pollution, in the toxicity of the world. Those things, like power and speed, are perfectly measurable.

But we need also to raise the questions that are not quantitative. How happy are people?  How healthy are people? How are love and beauty faring?

.dc love.

A Reflection.  Solely for my personal benefit – read at your own risk.  Let’s just call this part of my personal “grieving” process.

Things I’ll miss most about DC:

1. The understanding that if you don’t want something anymore, you simply put it on the curb outside of your house.  Best house acquisitions to date:  brown suede armchair, countless free books, and one antique washboard.  :)  This is a habit I hope to impress upon Oklahoma City.
2. All of the FREE things to see and do.  Obviously I will miss the monuments and the museums.  But more than that, the simple routines that I’ve come to enjoy  … Jazz in the Garden in the spring and summer, live bluegrass at SOVA on Thursday nights, wandering the flea market and farmers market at Eastern Market on the weekends, swimming at the public pool at Haines Point, reading in any one of the countless parks, going on evening “fountain tours,” all of the free festivals/holidays/concerts (National Kite Flying festival, the various different street festivals, 4^th of July on the National Mall, free concerts at the Kennedy Center and on the Capitol steps, Screen on the Green, etc.)
3. National Community Church.  I don’t know how I happened upon such an amazing church.  Seriously.  It has been a god-send and a refuge these past 2 years.  Probably one of the things I’ll miss most about this city.  NCC has shown me just how many GOOD people there are here in DC.  So many individuals who are really working and living to bring the Kingdom.
4. The lifestyle.  I remember writing in a silly journal when I was younger “Things to do before I die” …. one of those items being “live in a big city for awhile.”  I don’t think I intentioned to pick THIS city, it kind of just happened.  But I love this CITY just so much.  Walking to the corner store.  Jogging by our US Capitol every night as if it’s no big deal.  Riding a bike down to meet friends on the Mall for Ultimate.  Wandering the old, historic neighborhoods.  Marveling at the age and beauty of the broken sidewalks.  Having reliable public transportation -- no matter how much we like to complain about it, I am so thankful for the Metro.  The food trucks and innumerable restaurants to try.  The concept of the restaurant/bookstore (life-changing, really).  HAPPY HOUR – it’s an institution here.   The busyness.  Yet the ability to roll out of bed for brunch on a lazy Saturday afternoon.  The fact you have to try REAL hard to find fast food.  Actually feeling the rain.  Because you are OUT in it.  Thank you DC for showing me a different way to live.   

Things I will NOT miss about DC:

1. The commutes, and I don’t even commute.
2. The political craziness.  Not so much the discussion, I like that.  And I like that I’ve lived a more informed life here.  But its generally the “I’m right/you’re wrong” mentality that I try to avoid.  It just seems to be one big seesaw – we are a fickle people.  I heard a great quote that said the “pendulum” would continue to sway politically back and forth until lawmakers and leaders understood that the average American is “mostly socially moderate and fiscally conservative.”  I tend to agree and I think that the first leaders to really understand this will earn the public’s trust.  (Granted, those seem to be a bit diametrically opposed.  Definitely not an easy balance to make, but necessary.)
3. Along the same lines, I will NOT miss the “Hill creatures” as we like to call them … well-meaning, low level Hill staff and interns who are just plain annoying.  And they’re always dressed so fancy too.  Bah.  Especially abhorrent are the schmoozing (and short) male staffers.  You are not anyone special.  (well, at least not yet.)
4. Georgetown and its rich trust fund babies.  See #3, replacing  “Hill creatures/staff” with “Georgetown students.”  Sorry, no love for the Hoyas.
5. The price it takes to feed oneself.  An average meal out is $10 on the LOW low super LOW end.  I can do without that.  Thanks.  Same goes for rent.

The District Soundtrack:

1. Avett Brothers – “If I Get Murdered in the City” reminds me of my mother so much.  Ha.  I’m not sure she believed I would survive in the “big city.”  Also - one of the best concert experiences to date (tied with Mat Kearney).  I have my dear friend Sarah to thank for that ticket.
2. Girl Talk – Thank you Alissa Walter.  Google them.  Download them.  Obsess over them (wearing earmuffs for “certain language” if you must.  Ha – definitely a bit “rough.”)
3. Mat Kearney – let’s face it ... he’s just generally on my life soundtrack.  Good old Mat has been faithful through the years, but his humor and authenticity in person at the Historic Synagogue (best underappreciated venue in DC) made me fall in love all over again.  His new album will be out soon too.  Excited.
4. Jonathan David Helser – see previous blog post.  I could not love this couple (plus the boys in the band) any more than I do.  Both musically and personally.  Amazing how they navigate the gamut between screaming, jumping and dancing to leading quiet, truth led worship.  They share from such a place of honesty and compassion - you can’t help but feel their hearts (and the Father’s heart) in their music.
5. Coldplay – I’m not sure how it happened, but I am a late Coldplay bloomer.  I can’t count how many times I have played “Strawberry Swing” or “Kingdom Come” or “Life in Technicolor” or “Lovers in Japan.”
6. Glee – I really don’t need to say any more. 
7. Jesus Culture – thank you Romania and YouTube for introducing us.  Kristene Mueller, Kim Walker, & Chris Quilala are leading a generation in real, raw worship.  I read a cool article about how Kim’s version of “How He Loves Us” was an accidental hit.  Some kid posted the video on YouTube without her knowing.  She actually said that she was a bit embarrassed after that worship set because she got “carried away.”  Needless to say, the song blew up and I am glad for it.  Unhindered.  Free.  And refreshing.
8. Mumford & Sons – Lyrically one that continues to impress me.  I like the sound and harmonies of the Avett boys better, but some of M&S’s lyrics are just killer.  Favorites include:  “Love that will not betray you, dismay or enslave you, It will set you free.” and “It seems as if all my bridges have been burned, You say that’s exactly how this grace thing works.  It’s not the long walk home that will change this heart, But the welcome I receive at the restart.”
9. Lady Gaga – Although I wouldn’t quite label myself a “little monster,” I do have to admit I’m a huge Gaga fan.  In the future when I think back to this time in my life, undoubtedly Gaga will be included.

.all that remains was, really meant to stay.

Don't be afraid of the silence. God may be doing more when you can not hear him, than when he is speaking. Redemption comes like the silent snow that falls while we sleep. You wake up and the entire landscape has changed. The dark and barren colors of winter are transformed into a bright white glory that almost blinds you. When you look out the window you see a brand new world. The snowflakes echo the silent redemption plan of a King who came as a baby. A baby who became the Savior and who stood silent as a lamb before the shearer. His silent sacrifice covered the whole earth in redemption that turned the crimson stains as white as snow.

My wife and I bought our son Cadence a ukulele for Christmas. A few nights before Christmas, when we were supposed to be wrapping his present, we started writing a song on his ukulele. The song was about the snowflakes falling and winters silent song. The next morning after breakfast we slipped into the bedroom to finish the song. As we were finishing the last verse of the song, we were interrupted by the joyful squeals of my two children playing outside. We looked out our window and were astonished to see them playing in a surprise snow storm. None of the weather reports had even mentioned the slightest chance of snow. We could hardly believe that the snow started falling as we finished the last verse of the song. This little video was filmed from our back porch just a few minutes later.

Sing Winter

Hear the snowflakes falling, winter's calling my name.
The silent song she's singing, what's she trying to say

Can I fall like glory, to wash your year away
All that remains was, really meant to stay

Come and clothe me winter, I really need a change
With silent redemption, cover me in grace

Hear the song of beauty, melodies and sounds
Cover you in white love, a joy you lost but now you found

Sing, sing, winter, sing me your silent song.

 

a reminder.

i have my dear roommate Emily to thank for this latest post.

she told me a story about how she used to read my blog before moving back to DC.  and how she loved it. 

i'd like to believe it was in part to my clever humor or good tastes.  or the fact i pride myself in "typing" as i am.  talking to the screen as if it's somehow listening.  being myself by talking in sentence fragments or bullet points or dot dot dots.  it's how the thoughts are jumbled in my head, so what not let them appear that way on screen?  i hope to live an unedited life.  here should be no different.

anyway - this is all besides the point.

the REAL point .... is that Emily reminded how much i miss this side of me.  

putting together thoughts and images isn't much.  but somehow it's MY thoughts and MY images ... the very things that make up my life.  where are all these thoughts and daily snapshots going if they're not being documented somewhere?  no - not just documented.  but appreciated.  and noticed.  and valued.  i want to appreciate life.  and i want to remember that i appreciate life.  this space allows me to do that.  

 

i've always been drawn into the art of introspection.  my journals are some of my most important possessions.  (you know that whole "if you house catches on fire & you can only grab 3 things" game??  yeah, that's me - crazy 10 year-old girl running out of her burning house with an armful of journals.)  weird?  maybe.  but true.  somehow i know they will mean something.  and DO mean something.  somehow i'm sharing a part of my soul.  be it on paper or on this screen, i know that one day i will read these thoughts and be able to glimpse back into me.  and i think that's beautiful.

best thing i've seen in days.

Obama Releases 500,000 Men From U.S. Strategic Bachelor Reserve

i really miss blogging .... one day i'll be back.

Registration is closed.  The hotel booking is complete.  The shirts have been ordered.  The programs have been designed.  The AV Tech has been hired.  Transport is all but finalized.

 

Hmmm ... why do I feel like a million things will still come up between now and August 30^th?!   Ha.

Clearly I haven't even had time to blog about my life lately.  But for those who don't know (and are still reading - *wink), I am essentially THE Event Coordinator for a 400+ person event in Ireland at the end of the month.  I've been working since March to put together the World Race's 2nd Annual Awakening worship conference.  It is the one time of the year that ALL current World Racers are in the same location at the SAME time - 5 squads and almost 300 Racers!!!  Crazy! 

So - needless to say - it's been a lot of work.  But I am to the point finally that I'm honestly excited to see how it all comes together.  This is the first large-scale event that I've coordinated since my glory days as Student Body President in high school.  Something tells me this is a BIT different than preparing for the school dance and blowing up 1,000s of balloons for the massive homecoming decorative tree.  :)  But at the same time, I'm in my element.  I love the details.  I love the excitement and being able to work with so many different people.  And I LOVE what it's ultimately about.

4 days for Racers to sit.  And be still.  And pray and seek.  And be poured into.  And just be with one another.  And play.  And sing.  And dance.  And love.  And ... so much more.

I am still in need of $2,000 for this project.  I am 100% support funded and would love to raise this BEFORE I head to Ireland.  It would be one small detail I could check off my absurdly long list of "Things To Do"  :)

If you'd be interested in supporting me - you can click on the link to the left.  And as always, prayers would be appreciated:

• That the Awakening would be meaningful for all participants - that our time together would be powerful and impactful
• That I would be able to ENJOY my time with my WR family on top of all my responsibilities
• That options would materialize in my post-Awakening job search!  :)
• And ultimately, that I would remember that the Lord is my strength and provider - that all of THIS is only going to happen by his hand and grace!  Ahhhh!

Thanks and I'd love to hear from you!  Blessings. Michelle

.inhabiting the moment.

Everyone is too busy all the time. We have become a nation of multi-taskers. By definition, multi-tasking means the mind is divided and not fully focused on any one event. A very simple definition of mindfulness is doing one thing at a time. If we are planting some turnips, we are doing it properly. If we are reading to a child, that is all we are doing.

I have a long history of doing two or three or seventeen things at once. I am cooking, but planning my next road trip. I am talking on the phone, but wondering if I have a can of tuna handy for lunch. I am bird-watching, but worrying if I have offended someone. I am walking, but even as I smell the French lilacs in the air and notice the heron on the lake, I am thinking of presidential politics. Yet slowly I am discovering that life is best when I am one place at a time; that is to say that when I am cooking, I am cooking. Well, okay, maybe stirring and listening to the radio, but I am not planning a Father's Day party for the extended family. Sometimes inhabiting the moment is simple indeed. We hear Louis Armstrong or Chopin on the radio. We taste our lover's kisses, the pomegranate juice or the salt air. We smell the sage or the jasmine blossom.

Because children live in the present, we can join them in fresh experiences. Until they are educated away from living in the moment, that is their natural place. Just recently, I drove my grandchildren to the Ozarks for a family reunion. Eating a chocolate doughnut at our Days Inn and thinking about swimming with her newfound cousins, three-year-old Claire said, "My heart is snuggling inside me." Then she realized this didn't quite express what she was experiencing in her chest. She said, "My heart feels very big right now." Her life was not so complicated that she couldn't recognize the physical sensations of joy....

To create moments in our daily lives, we must have a new set of skills for making magic out of the ordinary. The more moments we find, the more we learn to find them.



Inhabiting Our Moments
Mary Pipher

I initially read Traveling Mercies by Anne Lamott while I was on the World Race in 2007. I remember flying through it on a mattress on the floor of our church in Belen, Costa Rica. ha.

It's safe to say that I LOVE Anne. And I already feel like we're friends.

I want to be THAT authentic about my faith. Not just how I live it .... but how I TALK about it too. Give me the gritty, raw stuff.

So .... here are some of my favorite lines from the book ..... enjoy :)

• "My coming to faith did not start with a leap ... but rather a series of staggers."
• "Only grieving can heal grief ... I'm pretty sure that it is only by experiencing that ocean of sadness in a naked and immediate way that we come to be healed - which is to say, that we come to experience life."
• "I understand just enough about life to understand that I do not understand much of anything."
• "Where there is ruin, there is hope for a treasure." -Rumi-
• "If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans." - hahahaha. so true.
• "We in our faith work - stumble along toward where we think we're supposed to go, bumbling along, and here is what's so amazing - we end up getting exactly where we're supposed to be."
• "Nietzsche said that he could only believe in a God who would dance, and I feel the same way." -me too. :)
• "The world sometimes feels like the waiting room of the emergency ward and that we who are more or less okay for now need to take the tenderest possible care of the more wounded people in the waiting room, until the healer comes. You sit with people, you bring them juice and crackers."
• "Again and again I tell God I need help, and God says 'Well, isn't that fabulous? Because I need help too. So you go get that woman over there some water, and I'll figure out what we're going to do aboutyour stuff." :)
• "The road to enlightenment is long and difficult ... and you should try not to forget snacks and magazines."
• "Grace is having a commitment to - or at least an acceptance of - being ineffective and foolish."
• "I think I already understand about life = pretty good, some problems." -Sam Lamott @ age 7
• "I believe that when all is said and done, all you can do is show up for someone in crisis, which seems so inadequate. But then when you do, it can radically change everything. Your there-ness ... can be live-giving. So you come to keep them company when it feels like the whole world is falling apart and your being there says that just for this moment, this one tiny piece of the world is okay, or at least better."
• " ... a person being herself is beautiful - that contentment and acceptance and freedom are beautiful."
• "Ugliness is creeping around in fear."
• "It's what we DO in families: we help, because we were helped."
• "Let the beauty we love be what we do." -Rumi ..... I also think me and Rumi would have been good friends!
• "Because Christianity is ABOUT water: 'Everyone that thirsteth, come ye to the waters.' It's about baptism, for God's sake. It's about full immersion, about falling into something elemental and wet. Most of what we do in worldly life is geared toward our staying dry, looking good, not going under. But in baptism, in lakes and rain and tanks and founts, you agree to do something that's a little sloppy because at the same time it's also holy and absurd. It's about SURRENDER, giving in to all those things we can't control; it's a willingness to let go of balance and decorum and get drenched."
• "This is the most profound spiritual truth I know: that even when we're most sure that love can't conquer all, it seems to anyway. It goes down into the rathole with us, in the guise of our friends and there is swells and comforts. It gives us our 2nd winds, 3rd winds, hundredth winds."