Long, long, long time since I posted. Life's awesome. Minus the lack of sleep and lack of time to do assignments properly, life's great.

It's been 2 months since I started work, and met really nice people. I only like work because of the people, then a lot of them are leaving, and honestly? I'm sad because I don't know if there's anymore chance to know them better once they leave. Yes, fine, life's filled with goodbyes. I still don't like it. ):

Thank god for CNY because if I don't get proper rest soon I feel as if I may just die from heart failure or something. Okay, touch wood. Though I really am tired to the bone. My mom commented that my face looked gray one morning and ask me to skip class to rest instead. My face looked gray. Isn't that the colour of the deceased ._. What a reassuring description...

Anyway, today's CNY eve, and I have a work shift. Don't wanna go to work, really. Don't have a choice either, because I want to buy my stuff really soon. Sigh.

Here's a really nice song~ I heard this many times but never knew who sang it. Finally found it! ^^

Today, I clear a third of my freaking dusty table and ONE single shelf out of my two whole shelves of books. And I already can't walk around without stepping onto something.

Okay, I threw away a lot of useless junks which I don't know why I kept in the first place, and recycled stacks of unwanted paper and books, and dug out stacks of white paper for the printer. I cannot fathom how that much dust can actually accumulate in my room. But argh, damn they are irritating ):

Ah this war will most probably last a couple of days. I can't wait for when everything's clean!

Let's go!

In 2044, waiting for our turn to present our REMT song. Finally finally done with everything, but the song's not mastered yet though. I thought the atmosphere will be scary, but it's surprisingly relaxed and all. (: Yay.

Ahhh 44's cold, and I'm hungry and sleepy, pathetic situation.

I hope everything will be done soon! Can't wait for the end of the week, it'll be holidays soon!!! \o/

I'm a lousy excuse for a friend, I think.

Of all the days I have to screw up, it must be today. Feels downright horrible. Never again man, never again.

Come on. Do I really look like I'd go cancel an appointment, so my tooth could decay more and start hurting, just so I can go to an expensive clinic? Like what the fuck? I hardly slept the entire night thanks to it. And the first thing any caring Mom would say is "Are you okay? Does it hurt a lot?"

Oh but no, first thing I got was "Your tooth hurts? Go gargle with salt water. Maybe infection." Like hello? It's MY mouth, MY teeth and I know when it's a gum infection. So I explained myself, and what do you know? I got reprimanded, complained about and what else. "Already told her, could have went for the appointment, just rush down from school. But she has to go and cancel. Does she know how expensive the dentist is?!"

Of course I bloody know how expensive it is, okay? I had to make a choice between important classes and the dental appointment. So I weighed my options, mind you, and decided that class was more important AT THAT TIME. I followed up and made another appointment, but that's like a few months later. My tooth's hurting now?

Can't I get some care and concern instead of cynicism, sarcasm, and what, disbelief? It's not like I chose to have a cavity to spend your money. I'd give you money to not have cavity, screw it. And I DO brush my teeth, do you even have to ask? -__- I can hear you bloody clearly from my room, so if there's anything just say it to my damn face. I am hurt that you don't even trust me, and thanks a lot for the overwhelming concern.

My tooth hurts, I need the dentist, I'm fucking cranky, I'm tired, and I need to sleep. I swear this is the most vulgar moment I've had in my life. Sorry to self for swearing so much.

I NEED TO CONCENTRATE ON FREAKING GEMSGEMSGEMSGEMSGEMSGEMSGEMS... D:

My stomach is bothering me like mad. Ah well. Am probably going to stay off fb for this week, think I can do that.

Will be doing a remix of a few songs for my brother's music homework. Like WHAT? Secondary school kids are learning audacity in music classes, wow. The younger kids are going to be like tech whizzes without manners, with exceptions of course, not generalizing.

Off to draw my bunny girl sprite. Argh gems, it'll be out of the way SOON :D

Finally did something for DVPT today! Stop motion is so cool :]

Anyway, in any case my mum reads this, I'll be very honest about stuff. It's not that I don't want to talk face to face, but every time I tried, it doesn't seem like anyone would really listen. My words would be interpreted wrongly, and I'd be interrupted so often, I can't be bothered to say anymore. That's what happened with Grandma. Even with an apology and all the things I've done in the past, one sentence interpreted wrongly is enough to condemn me.

Why? Seriously, why? Can I not be judged by that one small mistake?

I don't know why the letter addressed to me is not left alone to be opened by me. That aside, thank you for the concern (: 至少我当成是关心。因为很多时候对我说话时都是用责骂的口气，要不就是指责的口气。我对肢体语言又比较敏感，你不觉得是带刺的话，我听了倒觉得很不舒服。指责完可能两天后就忘记，可是那些指责的话和语气我要忘记也望不了，想到就超难过。不知到为什么你就可以这么不在乎自己说的话会不会伤到别人？用解释的我会明白，都已经多大了，不是小孩子。有事可以谈可以讲，在指责下去我只会越来越不想听。真的。

还有，我已经知道自己要的是什么，所以我在尽力了。是，我还是有偷懒，还很迟睡，可是我在认真了好吗。真的很忙，要做工也是想买乐器或是音响之类的电器。真的以为我会把钱都拿去买衣服啊？我看起来真的那么烂吗。至少也相信我多一点，看得起我多一些？都不知道是不是真的了解我。

累累累。已经不想在解释和维护自己的所作所为。如果还是不相信，我也不知到要怎么证明了。无所谓吧。

Fleepy, I'll go to sleep now. Planned to go swimming tomorrow. Need to train my arm muscles so I can hold the flute better. :O

Good night!!