Thoughts in the Early Morning

It's the wee hours and I just got nugget to sleep. He is a darling and I can't believe how much I love him.

On a practical note, the breastfeeding is going much better. Before he was eating 2 out of 8 feeds on breastmilk and none of those from the breast directly but pumped and fed to him in a bottle. We have made great progress and have reversed that trend. He now eats about 6 out of 8 feeds from breastmilk and rarely refuses the breast. I am pumping after every feed to still try and up my production so those last two feeds can be converted from formula to breastmilk. As Bryn gets older, Kevin and I figure out more things about him and about how to make the breastfeeding work. We have to get him on a schedule so that he eats every 3 hours. If we let him go past 3 hours he gets too hungry and will refuse the breast. But he's funny because even though we know he's hungry he won't wake up. Guess sleep is more important than food to the little guy! I hate waking him up because he's so cute when he's asleep but know that I will pay for it later when he won't eat on the breast, which always makes me sad and frustrated.

The last two days have been really lovely. Kevin is off work so the three of us have had some wonderful quality time together. We haven't done much besides afew walks but hanging around the house and taking it easy is welcome after the hectic pace we've had lately. I keep telling Kevin that I don't want him to go back to work after new year. Am dreaming up wild schemes for how Kevin could take a year off and we could just have family time together. So far nothing realistic has come up. Hmmm...wonder why?? Guess if it was that easy everyone would be doing it!

We recieved a mountain of really thoughtful gifts at christmas that my parents carted over from Canada (thanks guys, It took up one whole suitcase!). Can't believe how many people wanted to get something for Bryn and how nice all the gifts were. Thank you cards are on the way to everyone who sent things as soon as a I get some time between feeds to write them up. In the meantime, THANK YOU to everyone who sent something along. Everything is much appreciated!

Have to admit that Lauren and Mario outdid themselves once again on the pressies. Who knew you could fit so many fun, personal, appropriate, unique and happy-making items in one shoe box! We have not been able to reciprocate on too many christmas gifts for people with the Bryn-bear taking up most of our time. Haven't done our christmas letter this year either. Think we might have to skip it. But please know that if you didn't get a letter or gift from us this year, we are still thinking about all our friends and family and loving you anyway.

Well, the baby is sleeping so you know what that means...time for this mommy to hit the hay too.

P.S. is the comment section broken? Because we haven't had hardly any comments although I know there are a ton of regular readers because I hear 'I saw __ on the blog...' from a lot of you. Take a minute to write something if you can. Fun to have two way communication!

Granny Bean and Grandpa Jar

Bryn has quite the hockey hair. Although he was 'made in Britain' he definitely knows he's a Canuck.
Jet lag catches up with JR. Well, maybe this is a bit kind because he's pretty much had a nap on the couch every day and I'm sure it can't still be jetlag. But relaxing is what you're supposed to do at Christmas right? :)


Granny Bean checks out the Bryn Bear.

Bryn Meets Brendan

The other Kevin checks out Bryn.

I love this picture of Bryn and his daddy! Two very handsome fellows.

The classic snowsuit starfish. He was such a stay puff marshmellow man that I had to take a picture of him even though he was not too pleased with me.

Two happy parents, Kevin and Emily, in love with their little Brendan.

Bryn checks out Brendan who is 3 weeks older than him. It is amazing how much bigger, stronger and more developed Brendan is. Holding him felt so neat as I got to imagine what Bryn will be like in a few weeks. That time although short makes a big difference to their development as it is almost half his life so far.

This is one to confuse the geneologists 100 years from now. Moms should always hold their own babies in photos. But like I said, I really enjoyed holding Brendan. He's a cutie with those pudgey cheeks.

More from Lan's Visit

My beautiful sister and my beautiful son. Lee Ann was an absolute star. I know I told her over and over again but I had a FANTASTIC time with Lee Ann. She was so incredibly helpful cooking meals, putting me to bed when I looked exhausted, helping me run errands, changing diapers and cuddling Bryn. But the most important thing she did was give me emotional support. At that point I was so down about the breastfeeding which was going horribly. She remained resolutely positive about the whole situation and refused to let me spiral down into the cave where the 'insufficient mother monster' lives. Her words of encouragement no matter what the situation were invaluable. It was so wonderful to have my sister all to myself. It was selfish I know but I enjoyed so much having all this time together where we could just talk and I could learn from the pro about mothering. Lan, I can't tell you how MUCH I appreciated your visit. You are awesome! Also thanks to Sean who made it happen, booking Lan's ticket and making allt he travel arrangements and taking care of Davin and Owen so that Lan could come to Oxford. Thank you both!
Lan bought this so cute bear who is incredibly soft and huggable. He reminded her of 'pear baby' so named because the massive cloth nappies (diapers for the non-uk people) we've been using. Bulky baby is the price to pay for saving the environment. Anyways, the bear has the same shape, rather bulgy around the bottom and the two of them were beyond cute together. We had a major photo shoot but sadly none of the photos on our camera captured the moment well enough so will have to get Lan to send me some of hers.
Proud parents.

Lan rocks (ha, ha).

Lan, the baby whisperer.

Cuddle time.

I am so excited that he now fits into the orange sleeper. He is such a cute pumpkin. He has outgrown the newborn sleepers I bought and now fits into the 0-3 month ones. He was 4 weeks old on Tuesday. The time is flying by and he is changing so fast. People always said 'enjoy them while they are little because it doesn't last long'. I know what they mean. I can see he will be walking and talking in such a short time and I will be wondering where the wonderful cuddly newborn stage went.

Three generations of Hakls.

My friend Mirjam tries out holding a new baby. She is due any day now and I am really excited for her baby to come so she can experience all the amazing emotions we've gone through since Bryn came to us.
Blue baboon bum baby.
Enough with the photos! The paparazi are killing me.

He does this thing where he tucks his thumb inside his finger. Kevin says this is a habit we have to fix as if he becomes a boxer he will break his thumb. :)

Over Birthweight

Today Bryn was weighed by the midwife and he is finally over his birthweight. He was 3.2kg at birth and today was 3.5kg after 3 weeks. Whew! Have been stuffing him full of milk and he has finally plumped up. So he was discharged from midwife care and we are now fully released from medical care.

The breastfeeding still isn't great. He is getting about a third of his calories from breastmilk and the rest from formula. But the latch is getting better all the time and he is gradually eating more on the breast so I am hopeful that I will be able to decrease the amount of formula soon. But the important thing is that he's eating.

And he sure is cute and it is uncanny how much he looks like Jim. All day today every time I looked at him I would see my brother when he was a baby. Although I talked to Sean briefly and he said he think Bryn looks like me. He definitely has Kevin's hands, feet and hairline. Guess we'll see what he looks like as he grows. Time will tell!

These first 4 pictures are hilarious. I'm sure Bryn will curse me when he's an adult for humiliating him but I thought they were so funny.

Mom is desperate for more photos, so here they are...

I think we ended up with the 'McDonald' boy. To me he looks very much like Jim.

Kathryn and Wayne came out to Oxford today for a quick visit on their way from Kenya and before they head back to Tajikistan.
Wayne tries his hand at feeding Bryn. He got Bryn when he was crying and I said that was brave of him. He said 'There's no where to go but up from here!'. Can I give him to you every time he cries Wayne? :)

Jan and I thought he looked like the sun in his yellow sleeper with the blue blanket as the sky. Unfortunately his debut as the sun was short lived as shortly after this photo he peed all over himself. I ended up changing his outfit about 6 times this day and emptied the sleeper drawer. He has the 'pee on the change table as soon as mom has my diaper off' technique down pat. Such a clever little man.
Family photo. You can see who the happy one is.
So cute you want to eat him!
Couldnt decide which of the photos was cuter so posted them both.
Gramma and Bryn after a bath. He quite likes the bath which is good, since he tends to blow out of his nappies and requires a good hose down afterwards.

P.S. Thanks Emily and Kevin for the awesome towel/apron Jan is wearing. It has come in soooo handy.

P.P.S. Sorry for all the diaper talk. But this is now what my day consists of.

Gramma and Grandpa

Jan and Lloyd arrived on Wednesday and we were THRILLED to have them. So nice to have them meet Bryn and they have been a huge help so far. Lloyd has quite a big task list and we have got him working on everything from repairing bikes to bidding on rocking chairs on ebay to grocery shopping. Jan has been an absolute star making dinners, helping calm Bryn and doing loads of laundry. I really don't know how we would have coped without help, especially with Kevin going back to work. He only did two half days on Thursday and Friday afternoon but managing on my own without help from Jan and Lloyd would have been pretty tough so I am so thankful that they were willing to come all this way to help us out.

All bundled up.

Grandpa falls sway to the soporific effects of a warm newborn.
Mom and Bryn.


Grandpa lays eyes on his grandson for the first time.

Proud grandparents!

Gramma checks out the Bryn Bear.

Bryn's second bath. Dad has done the honours both times. He is a pro!