...gone the sun.

Yeah ME!!

I didn't even have to work hard.  Shheeeeshhh.....where's the fun in that?!
I guess the secret is to either say "The Bug wants to ____fill in the blank___" OR you have his friends drop in for a visit.
Who cares if the result is a trip to the pumpkin patch!!

I have gourds and wee pumpkins and more gourds and a couple squash and more gourds....and one tan pumpkin and one orange pumpkin.
Not enough pumpkins to carve for Halloween, mind you...so we'll just haffta go again next weekend with the Bug.  :-/

I recall last year.....waiting til the last minute and having NO carving pumpkins.  NOT happening again.

And the gals were glad to see us.  I'm assured myself and the small child can wander the field to select the pumpkins and gourds of own choosing.  Hahaha....did that last year on crutches.  How amazing it's a year later and that's a memory that's already a bit messed up in details.

Never mind....we have pumpkins!!  And I got to see goats and donkeys and sheeps and pigs and llamas and alpacas!!  :-)
It's fall and I went to the pumpkin patch already!!  Do you KNOW how many weekends I have to visit again?!  :-D

Treasure Fairy

Lay not up for yourselves treasures on earth where moth and dust doth corrupt, where thieves break through and steal; but lay up treasures in heaven ... for where your treasure is, there will be your heart also.

--Matthew 6:19 21

The True Treasure

Consider the following story of misplaced priorities. While hiking in the wilderness, I met a man whose T-shirt carried the following message: "He who dies with the most toys, wins."

As I pondered those words, I was sure that the author meant the opposite of what he said. No one on his deathbed ever stated, "I wish I had spent more time at the office." We were put on this earth not to accumulate "toys," but to reap the gifts of the spirit. These gifts come to us when we dedicate our lives to something greater than ourselves — a path of service in the world, the raising of a loving family, the creation of beauty through art, or any passion that inspires one.

Having lived in this manner, you can look back over your life with a real sense of fulfillment. By following the path of peace, love, and joy, you will discover your true treasure — one that transcends death itself.

He who dies having followed his heart, wins.

Note

I didn't get in a vehicle today.

Not the car.
Not the Jeep.

There was no travel......to anywhere.

And it was AWESOME.

Sentinel

More from the Fairy

Growing

We all perform on two stages: one public, one private. The Public stage is what we do and say. The Private stage is what we think and what we rehearse in our minds to do on the Public stage. Even though we may never perform it, what we rehearse in our minds helps mold our character and guide our actions.

To keep growing and to keep building character, we need to rehearse kindness, patience, and love. We need to practice awareness how we treat others, no matter the 'stage'.

In progress, too

Playday Friday

A little bit of foam board cut into 6” squares, glue, magnets…..and magazines to cut up--  It was Playday Friday and we had more than just the two we normally have.  Seems we’re the ‘in’ place to be on Fridays.  They don’t check in with me, of course—they check in with my ever so kind buddy. She’s the one who calls when we do it.  I wait for her, cuz I don’t know her workload and mine isn’t so great I can’t participate—until the end of the month happens.  Then I scramble.

We had the cool IT dudes and secretary and a couple gals who actually use the visitors cubes.  We’ll be using the collages on magnets to decorate the visitor’s cubes.  This week it’s the beach cube that I’ve been collecting stuff for here and there.  My buddy snagged the cube across from her so she can enjoy the view.  A beach ball, shells, a bucket and shovel—some shiny blue glass tossed in, and a basket, of course.  She’s thrilled she got to assemble it.  I’m thrilled she’s thrilled.  And in the process, we make another visitor’s space…FUN and cool…..and fun to look at even when it’s empty.

It’s kinda nice to be able to call a ‘time out’ for the professionals.  Sometimes they seem to be taking life too seriously.  And I suspect they’re just as lousy as I can be when it comes to taking care of themselves.  So……..it’s good we’re getting a few ‘takers’ for Playday Friday.  And it’s good the end result is some ownership for how things look in this little space that we work in.

And it’s REALLY GOOD that I got to play with glue and stuff.  Oh……and I only got told twice that I wasn’t to run with the scissors.

Hahaha….did!  Well……maybe not ‘run’……but I did walk faster.  :-P

Meet in the middle

Lights on........

There's a little game I play.  It's called 'how long will the lights remain off'.

I have the 'joy' of arriving first in the office.  Not because I have a mean boss who set me up with the earliest hours he could to make my life miserable. I set them myself.  Arriving at the office at 6:30 was the 'norm' for a number of years….only that's when the office was down the street.  Now it's an hour's drive.  It's become an almost pleasurable drive, it's alone time for me and the Big Guy.  Time to peek into the world as the sun rises, when the darkness fades into a vast array of reds and oranges, pinks and purples as light fills the corners of this little space of the world.

The hands of the clock stand at attention as I wander into the darkness of the space where I reside for eight or more hours.  And it's quiet.  Almost eerily so, the sound of the electronics beeping as I log into a computerized system comes muffled through the door I'm not allowed to open.  My happy little space is lit by the little tube that illuminates the fun stuff I surround myself with.

I plug away in solitude until I'm greeted by the high pitched "Good Morning!!" as the little IT fella finally arrives and tosses his treasure filled ruck sack into his 'space'.  He tells me I have a high pitched, happy greeting—and the little poop tries to imitate it.

Nope.  No overhead lights.  We've become known as the 'cave dwellers'—a happy correction from the 'vampire' label that others tried to give us. 

The little gal who's come to be my 'little buddy' arrives and slips into her space, sips on her coffee and yawns—but no overhead light happens.

And then the gal behind me, who laughs at the darkness we're operating in…..and then another and another. 

"I wonder who'll make 'the list' today" I hear.

Yes, there's a list—and a now standing joke about the poor IT fella who "couldn't stand it anymore" and "apologized cuz he just HAD to turn on the lights".  The list has become pretty long—filled with times and dates of the spoil-sports who couldn't honour the need for 'ambiance'.  Pffftttt to them.

Even the receptionist is in on the gig—she let's people know "they really are here—they just like to work without the overhead lights on….."

I love it when someone comes into our 'work zone' and remarks "Geeze……isn't anyone working today"—and I hear the whole lot of 'em laugh and razz the poor unknowing victim.

No worries.  Today the poor little IT fella who holds the record groaned as the lights came on at 9:04a.m. 

"Okay—who turned on the lights?!"  And ya gotta love the excuses and groans and harassing of the poor victim by the poor little IT guy who now wants everyone to leave the lights OFF so he doesn't hear:  "No worries Phil—you still hold the record at 9:37 when you wimped out had just HAD to turn on the lights!"

There's something about hearing a bunch of 'professionals' erupt in snickering and jeering.  *laughing*

I'm such a little agitator…….

Daily Reminder

No matter what faces us — an unhappy relationship, a serious operation or illness, a feeling of uselessness or helplessness — it is vital to realize that there is a solution.

We must not expect that the solution to our problem will bring us immediate peace of mind. Focusing our energies and emotions on the answer, not the problem, will, however, alleviate much of the futility and frustration we feel.

A medical doctor, George S. Stevenson, wrote, "The solution may not give you everything you want. Sometimes, it may give you nothing but a chance to start all over again. But whatever little it gives you is much more than you give yourself by letting your emotions tear you apart."

Today I will focus my energies and emotions on the solution, not the problem.

Snowballs in the garden

Daily Reading from the Fairy

To speak ill of others is a dishonest way of praising ourselves.

--Will Durant

Sometimes we say bad things about others. When we do this, it makes us look bad too. Our friends worry what we might say about them behind their backs. They're afraid to trust us. We become known as gossips.

The things we say about other people tell a lot about us. We are kind or unkind. We gossip or we don't. This doesn't mean we have to say everyone is wonderful all the time. As we work to grow,  to see ourselves better, we begin to see other people more clearly too. We see their strong points and their weak points. But we can know these things without gossiping about them.

Never tyre of happy

Penny Dropping

I don’t know how we picked the conversation—I think I might have even started it when I brought up the anniversary……and I wanted to tell the Big Guy what was ‘good’, but given that I didn’t have anything really ‘good’ to measure it against (cuz I gotta compare, dontchaknow!), I reached for the only thing I did have to compare it to, experientially.. .

….and then I got this ‘nudge’ and a sense of what an injustice that was.  But I did note the stark difference. 

Nothing ugly has happened to me in this relationship.  Nothing that demonstrated a disrespect and total disregard for human dignity has happened to me in this relationship. 

That alone was reason to celebrate, wasn’t it?

Not enough……While that was a reason to celebrate, absence of anothers’ character defects wasn’t exactly what the Big Guy was looking for, apparently. We all have character defects, just as we all have assets.

The pressure was on….. I know pressure—it’s that silent waiting……

So I reminded Him that I almost didn’t do this marriage because I didn’t want to compromise my relationship with Him.  I didn’t want to end up divorcing Him for the relationship with himself, and I wasn’t convinced I could manage both successfully. 

He was.

He mighta been right…..

So I told Him where it’s landed what’s good and right 11 years later:

“We have fun together.

We can go on adventures just down the road.

We can go on adventures far away.

We like some of the same things.

We like just enough of NOT the same things. 

We can sit apart and we can sit together.

We can sit and say nothing.

We can sit and say a lot.

We can laugh with each other.

We can cry with each other.

We can spar with words and outwit each other.

We can be okay with what the other is.

We can be okay with what the other isn’t.

We know when to let go and when to hang on.

We can chase frogs and rainbows and sunsets-- and each other, if need be.

We can be the individuals we are—warts and all.

We can be the couple that we are—quirks and all.

We can love how we want to love..

We can be comfortable with each other.

We ARE……..comfortable with each other.

And we are comfortable together.”

“Comfortable.”

“Yaknow—the same sort of comfortable I’ve come to have in my relationship with YOU.”

There’s a penny dropping moment……

I’m pretty sure He was smiling.  I could feel Him smiling…..and I could feel this peace in me, even though I didn’t steer the course of the conversation….

And I was saying out loud…..

“Maybe it’s okay to be ‘comfortable’ in the relationship.  Maybe that’s a good thing.  Maybe there’s a certain degree of ‘rest’ you do and ‘peace’ you discover because it IS comfortable.

Maybe there’s more to being comfortable with the relationship and comfortable IN the relationship than I gave credit to….”

And that’s when I heard Him laugh.

He’s funny like that—wasn’t enough that I connected ONE dot, He wanted a good chunk of today’s picture connected ….dot to dot to dot….it’s a pretty cool picture, even unfinished.

TFTD

Maturity doesn't come with age or intellectual wisdom, only with love.
--Ruth Casey

We may have thought being mature meant being "grown-up." This meant acting rationally, showing good judgment, no longer exhibiting childish behavior. It's doubtful that we ever considered the expression of love as an act of maturity. However, we are learning that the key to sustained growth is the ability to love one another and ourselves.

It seems so much easier to focus on others' faults than on their assets. In childhood we learned to compete with our classmates, and this taught us to be critical of one another. No teacher tested us on how we expressed love; rather, we worked on spelling and multiplication tables, and we were pitted against other students for the gold stars.

Now we are discovering how much more comfortable life is when we all get gold stars. We are handling every situation more sanely now that we have realized the gift of serenity that accompanies our expression of love.

My growth, my maturity, can best be measured by my attitude today. Am I loving, or am I still competing with the others?

...another.....

Presence

"C'mon. Hurry. Let's go," my friend said, shifting nervously from one foot to the other.

I looked around. Another friend, Michael, had just walked into the room. I hadn't seen him for a while. I felt compelled to go over and talk to him, even though I didn't have anything important to say.

"Please, let's go," my friend said again. I started to leave with him, then changed my mind.

"Give me just a few minutes," I said, walking away from my friend and moving toward Michael. We didn't talk about much, Michael and I. But I'll never forget that conversation. He was killed in an accident two weeks later. 

Some people suggest that our biggest regret when we die will be that we didn't work less and spend more time with the people we love. That may be true, but for me, I think it will be that I wasn't more completely present for each person, task, and moment in my life. 

Action: Do you remember the "stop, look, and, listen" slogan from when you were a child? Every so often, even for a few minutes each day, try to remember to practice it.

Slow down or stop - depending on how fast you're going.

Look - see where you are, whom you're with, what you're doing. Give whatever you're doing your attention.

Listen - as much as possible, quell your anxiety, cease your mental chatter, and just listen to nature, to other people, to God, and to yourself.

Colour me summer

Countdown to vacation

So we'll go to Devil's Tower.  And along the way we'll stop at the Badlands and the Black Hills, Mt. Rushmore, Crazy Horse and all that.  It's all places he's not been and things he's not seen.  I gotta hope himself won't be disappointed.  I mean, after Moab, The Arches and the Grand Canyon.....this'll be child's play.
Still, it's an adventure and we have ten days to play with.  Take six months with a broken leg and ten days is about what ya can afford....but....
It's all new territory even if it's closer and shorter....so I can hope.

We have a new atlas.  And we'll find trains and rocks and catch sunsets in wide open places.

Still, gotta hope it's "enough".

It's all good for me.  I have adventures in the back yard, hunting for frogs....watching butterflies, talking with ground squirrels that traipse on to the patio like they own the place.
LOL, maybe cuz they do?  :-)

Fairy Wisdom for the Day

No person is your enemy, no person is your friend, and every person is your teacher.

--Florence Scovel Shinn

We can open ourselves to opportunities today. They abound in our lives. No circumstance we find ourselves in is detrimental to our progress. No relationship with someone at work or at home is superfluous to our development. Teachers are everywhere. And as we become ready for a new lesson, one will appear.

We can marvel at the wonder of our lives today. We can reflect on our yesterdays and be grateful for the lessons they taught. We can look with hopeful anticipation at the days ahead - gifts, all of them. We are on a special journey, serving a special purpose, uniquely our own. No barrier, no difficult person, no tumultuous time is designed to interrupt our progress. All experiences are simply to teach us what we have yet to learn.

Trusting in the goodness of all people, all situations, all paths to progress will release whatever our fears, freeing us to go forth with a quicker step and an assurance that eases all moments.

Daily Reading

We must move forward with confidence, trusting that the strength we need will be given us, having faith in our visions to guide us. Problems need not daunt us. Rather, they can spur us on to more creative activity. They challenge our capabilities. They insist that we not stand still.

Pity from others fosters inaction, and passivity invites death of the soul. Instead, our will to live is quickened through others' encouragement. All else dampens the will. Pity feeds the self-pity that rings the death knell.

We can give strokes wherever we are today and know that we are helping someone. And each time we reach out to encourage another, we are breathing new life into ourselves, new life that holds at bay the self-pity that may appear at any moment.

We can serve one another best, never by commiserating with sadnesses, but by celebrating life's challenges. They offer the opportunities necessary to our continued growth.

Finding Frogs

Yeah for rain

Hahaha.....so, thunder it is!  Complete with the accompanying lightening and rain.  It's all good.  Gives me time to work on tidying up the disaster I make during the work week when I'm flinging stuff here and there trying to put wardrobes together and find something I wanna trudge through the day in.

And there's always cleaning and tossing out to do.  Dunno how I end up with so much STUFF.....k.....cuz I carry it home with me, THAT'S how.

And there's that book to read.  And the assignment from WPIML.  K!  Lack of things to do is NOT my dilemma.
Might be lack of desire to DO them.  LOL!

Maybe work on the pendant would make sense.
I mean, gee....it's taking up the coffee table....how can I dust if it's just sitting there taking up space?!

LOL....I can rationalize just about anything.

Reading for Today

Thunder is good, thunder is impressive; but it is the lightning that does the work.

--Mark Twain

Thunder demands our attention. From the ear-splitting boom overhead to the faint rumble in the distance, it is an impressive part of nature. Yet, it is the lightning that discharges electricity from one cloud to another, or to the earth.

We are sometimes like thunder. We may shout our intentions to family members, or quietly tell our dreams to friends. No matter how we say it, it is the ability to follow through that is most important. When we've completed what we've set out to do, we will feel a sense of satisfaction and energy. With this energy, and the knowledge we can finish what we set out to do, we will make our dreams come true.

jingle-jangles

Back attcha......

Last night I didn't hesitate. 

Three nights ago, I did.

I was angry, so I paused as I went to speak to the person who'd made the group responsible for hurting their fragile little alcoholic feeling.  So when I spoke to them after the meeting, I said what was 'kind and true'.   And probably what was 'necessary' at that moment.  

Targeting a person during the meeting they'd done what countless others have done, but I hugged 'em and let 'em know 'an ounce is that person you used for a punching bag—the two tons of truth is about your relationship with sister'. Immediate, uncontrolled sobbing, I was clutched tightly.

I'm scared for them--those things which haunt us, drive us to self destruction.

I didn't address the anger I felt.  I know enough to pause and buy time—the anger was mine to sort through.  I can't rightly be effective pointing out something while doing it. 

But boy howdy was I angry.

Enough that I rang WPIML the next day……and left a message……Fine.   Apparently I'm suppose to wade through this one a different way.

Last night…..LAST night was 'in your face' , 'back 'em into a corner with words', 'counter everything said with fact', 'quote the book and watch 'em squirm'.

Makes me wonder if I spent some of that 'angry' in wrong places—though the 'fact is' you don't get to tell me you'll do something two weeks ago….and not follow through.  Especially when that 'something' is vital to the foundation needed to stay clean and sober.  And when I inventory it—I wasn't particularly 'angry'……I mean, geeze--been there, done that….ran it til the wheels fell off.  They either "want what we have and are willing to go to any length to get it"—or they don't.  It's that simple.  *sigh*  Just not 'easy'……

Himself knew I was angry and that I called WPIML –and I was late returning from the meeting last night.  He just had to ask if things were 'okay'.

Yup—as okay as they can get when I get to stand over here and watch the disease do what the disease does. 

"You don't get to help everyone." (OMG…he's such an AlAnon—of course I get to help everyone, I have that responsibility outlined for me…..it's just the matter of their willingness to accept that help, which is what makes me nutzo sometimes.  LOL)

So I talked what I knew was okay to talk—I talked in terms of ME.

"There's this disease in me—and I can convince myself, delude myself, lie to myself……and in an instance, even when I'm not thinking I wanna drink…..I can pick up and drink.  I used to think it was those moments when things were going crappy, when I was pissed off and thinking I had a 'right' to drink that I needed to be vigilant.  I'm not so sure that I don't need to be AS vigilant when things are going well.  So I go to meetings—and I call WPIML…..and I do my readings and suit up and show up when I'm asked……..cuz it's about my LIFE, yaknow?"

And then I looked at him and said "Can you imagine what would happen if I started drinking?"

And he answered….in a voice that said 'pay attention Mel'……

"It scares me to, but yes…….I can--and do imagine it."

Crap.

Yaknow—suddenly I have something 'different' to talk to WPIML about.  And it ain't so much about what pissed me off three days ago…. 

Whatdaya wanna bet he rings me back today…..LOL  That's JUST how it happens in my life…..'zackly when it's suppose to.

Fairy Material

The best thing that can come with success is the knowledge that it is nothing to long for. 

--Liv Ullmann 

Success may be defined in many ways. In our youth, we may have measured success in terms of having a million dollars, two cars, a swimming pool. But we are coming to believe that success means living an honest life, being of service to others and having a relationship with our Higher Power. 

Material success provides momentary pleasures but doesn't leave us with lasting happiness. We've all experienced the rush to buy another "toy," certain an inner void would be filled. Soon, we were tired of it and looking for another distraction. 

We are now learning how to fill those voids with genuine sustenance; our daily commitment others, 'right living',  and our relationship with God. 

What's in your cooler?

Fairy Reading

Believe more deeply. Hold your face up to the Light, even though for the moment you do not see.

-- Bill W.

At times, we'll go through pain and hardship. At times, we'll have doubts. At times, we'll get angry and think we just don't care anymore. These things can spiritually blind us. But this is normal. Hopefully, we'll be ready for those times. Hopefully, we will have friends who will be there for us.

Thank God for these moments! Yes, hard times can make our spirits deep and strong. These moments tell us who we are, where we are at--today. 

These moments help us grow and change. 

He just keeps rollin' along

Things that make me happy....

….watching lightening in far away clouds.

….making a 'beach cubicle' for visitors to use.

….the ooky spooky tree the spousal unit made me.

….sifting through all my Halloween crafting supplies…and deciding I need MORE.  LOL

….the "JOY" list at work—with dray erase crayons.

….the call from WPIML.

….the beach video the Girl sent.

….the picture of a happy sister with a snugglin' Bug on her lap.

….the half priced sundress!  Very cool!

TFTD

A good salesperson is usually a good listener. Being a good listener also helps in being a good parent or spouse, neighbor or friend. When we are truly able to hear what others are trying to say, we are better able to enter their world, and let them into ours.

Listening to the collective wisdom of others helps us gain understanding and perspective on the world around us.

It is not always easy to listen, because it's often our nature to want to be the center of attention. But listening is an art worth developing. It enriches our lives, improves our relationships, and helps us feel better about ourselves.

Fairy Schtuff

To a large extent, the way we think determines who we are and what happens to us.  

We cannot harbor poisonous thoughts without their effects visibly showing in our lives. If we dwell on our inadequacy and ineffectiveness, for example, circumstances will prove us correct because we will invite self-defeating events to us.  

On the other hand, replacing destructive thoughts with hope-filled, optimistic ones brings peaceful and confidence-producing circumstances to us. We will radiate competence and joy.  

Cradled

Talk to Me

After years of predictably unpredictable behavior.

Years of structure and consistency in how he worked with me.

Years of assignments, years of 'homework'…..

Years and years and YEARS of going over what was in those books.

Over and over and over and over again.

And over again.  Y.E.A.R.S. ……..

"Talk to me".

The book sat on the table and the agenda was suddenly changed …..without my permission.

TALK to me?!  What the hell…..talk to him about WHAT?

"Talk to me."

Right……  So, I tried to con my way through a conversation by asking him questions and his answer came back to:  "Talk to me".

I tried a bit of manipulation, a bit of pleading, a bit of prodding for a topic even….and it came back to the same request. 

I 'talked' with wise-person-in-my-life EVERY DAY……about readings, about principles, about traditions and steps and concepts and what to do with the ***holes in my life (of which there was one…….me…..)…….we TALKED all.the.time.  Daily, for goodness sakes……FOR.YEARS.

Uncomfortable in the silence, I even opened the book that sat on the table and invited  him to pick any line, any paragraph—pick "page 62" which describes my selfish/self centered ways to a 'T'….  Pick a whole chapter—but let's get back to the 'normal' agenda and off the silly notion that I needed to talk with him about something.

The book got quietly closed and placed back on the table…… 

And when the time ended-- I stuck my head into the kitchen to tell his wife that maybe he had a stroke or a brain tumor or something—cuz he was acting all kinds of weird and telling me to 'Talk to him'.

She had one of those 'all knowing' smiles sometimes……and she used it when she told me "All is well'.

There've been so many things that were bourne from that experience.  Huge  lessons.

Layers of lessons…..  Living lessons that connected the dots to the years and years of pouring over books.

And the lessons still continue—it's a whole new layer when I look at another one just like me and say "Talk to me."

TFTD

Stop expecting perfection from yourself and those around you.

We do a terrible, annoying thing to others and ourselves when we expect perfection. We set up a situation where others, including ourselves, do not feel comfortable with us. Sometimes, expecting perfection makes people so uptight that they and we make more mistakes than normal because we are so nervous and focused on mistakes.

That does not mean we allow inappropriate behaviors with the excuse "nobody's perfect." That doesn't mean we don't have boundaries and reasonable expectations of people and ourselves.

But our expectations need to be reasonable. Expecting perfection is not reasonable.

People make mistakes. The less anxious, intimidated, and repressed they are by expectations of being perfect, the better they will do.

Striving for excellence, purity in creativity, a harmonious performance, and the best we have to offer does not happen in the stymied, negative, fear-producing atmosphere of expecting perfection.

Have and set boundaries. Have reasonable expectations. Strive to do your best. Encourage others to do the same. But know that others and we will make mistakes. Know that others and we will have learning experiences, things we go through.

Sometimes, the flaws and imperfections in ourselves determine our uniqueness, the way they do in a piece of art. Relish them. Laugh at them. Embrace them, and ourselves.

Encourage others and ourselves to do the best we can. Love and nurture others and ourselves for being who we are. Then realize we are not merely human - we were intended and created to be human.

Fairy Reminder

Whatever men attempt, they seem driven to overdo. --Bernard Baruch  

It's usually very difficult for us to bring balance into our lives. We may find it hard not to put in overtime at work. We may be obsessed about housework or yard work to the extent that we work long hours at it. Whatever we do, whatever we have, whatever we want, it's usually not enough for us.  Any activity or commitment needs a certain amount of time, concentration, and energy. 

But some of us may be too absorbed in physical fitness to notice we are always tense, always on the go. Some of us may be so obsessed with money that we take on additional work, not noticing we are often hard to get along with. Some of us may be so fascinated by a hobby that we ignore people in our lives who need our time and attention, too.  

We need to recognize the obsessive areas of our lives and begin to make changes. It may mean assigning time limits to different activities. Or it may mean altering our schedules, even letting go of an activity. Now is the time to begin to bring balance into our lives, gently and gradually.  

I know I need more balance in my life. What are some changes I can make to bring the scales more in balance?

Another work in progress

Shhhh...

Shhhh...I didn't have permission to take the photo of himselfs ooky spooky wire tree that'll be decorated with bulbs for the top of my 'cube'.  He'd hate folks to think he actually fell for my sob story on depleted decorating time!  Hahaha....

Counting down, even if Mr. Grumpy Pants isn't....

I have it figured out cuz I'm a "forward thinker".

See, we leave for a 10 day adventure on September 12th.

All thing Halloween can't go outside til after 9/11, which means the 12th....which is when we'll be on the road....which pushes everything back til after the 23rd....when we'll be worn out fro all the adventuring.

Sooooo.....of course this means that something will have to give--which is why I forfeited my Sunday off to start my pendant for Halloween.

Wasn't that considerate of me?!  :-/

Reading for Today

When they take your smile away they might just as well shoot you.

--Violet Hensley

Violet is one big smile. And it's not the result of having an easy life. On the contrary, she has worked doubly hard all her life to support her family. However, she has a joyful attitude, and it has made the difference in her life. Now in old age, she still works hard making fiddles for sale and performing music; but she loves every minute of life, and when you're with her, you love it too.

Why aren't we more like Violet? The answer always rests within us. We have decided how to respond to life's trials. We were never forced to dread, hate, or appreciate our experiences. We were, and still are, solely responsible for our interpretation. The Violets of the world opted to have more fun.

How do we begin having more fun? The first step is deciding to leave the past behind. No matter what our experiences were last year or in our childhood or even this morning, they don't have to determine what our experiences will be in this next hour. Having more fun is clearly a decision that is coupled with action. Any one of us can do it as well as we want to.

Fairy Reminder

Loving others begins with respect.

So many books have been written on how to love that many of us assume we don't know how and maybe will never learn. We can simplify the process, however, by focusing on the Golden Rule. For starters, we can treat others as respectfully as we'd like to be treated. People respond well to respect, and they often pay us respect in return.

Next, let's put the needs of at least one other person ahead of our own today. It's imperative that we do it willingly, not resentfully. We'll discover an unexpected benefit; not being self-absorbed, for a change, is really quite refreshing.

Finally, we can ask God for freedom from the thinking that keeps us from loving others. Each person who enters our circle of experience today can be loved by us if we are but willing.

Loving others is easier if we keep it simple.

Fairy Thought

We can learn something from any experience, even one that is painful. In fact, we often learn more from painful experiences than from pleasant ones. When we say or do something foolish or hurtful that causes us embarrassment or guilt, pain gives us a reason to learn and behave differently next time. It may hurt , but the pain of that experience may be the beginning of change..

We can't change the experiences we have, but we can learn from them. Our life is a gift that comes wrapped in what we experience each moment. When we accept this gift and open it willingly, no matter what the wrapping looks like, we put ourselves in a position to discover unexpected treasures. We live life to the fullest, and we learn who we are as we grow. In that way, all experience is positive in building our new lives.

Fairy Reminder

It may be those who do most, dream most.

  —Stephen Leacock

Where would we be without the dreamers of the world - the ones who took the time to balance on the edge of wonder? Amazing connections, powerful images, and creative ideas come to us in daydreams. They creep in when we least expect them, like sleek cats, and then make their presence known to us with a gentle pounce. 

When we give ourselves permission to daydream - to sit for a while and do nothing but be quiet with our thoughts, we give ourselves a precious gift. And who knows, we just might be giving the world a priceless gift, too! Out of the seeds of some of our dreams, great ideas will blossom. 

Fairy Dust

It is not what you gather, 

but what you scatter, 

that tells what kind of life you have lived.

Fill 'er up

Things that make me happy....

….people who get their work done……on time.  *laughing*  Only cuz it means I can get MINE done on time!

….someone who says what they mean and means what they say, without saying it mean.  Now THERE'S a trick I wanna master.

….when the gal in the cubicle next to me visits the movie theatre and buys a BIG tub of popcorn.  Yup—cuz that means I'll get some.  J

….decorating a vacant cubicle—and knowing some unknowing person will get to use it cuz it's not 'taken'.  *laughing*  Amazes me how many fella's pass on sitting in an all PINK cubicle.  (now there's a secret survey I could take and find great amusement in…..LOL)

….my flagpole and flag finding its way home……still amazes me!

….the person who left a snakey fidget thing in my cubicle…….it's a most excellent fidget toy and I love that they wanna remain anonymous.  I'd want all the credit!  LOLOL

….the apology from himself last night…..out of the blue….for no apparent reason other than he thought about it and well and truly felt bad.  How can you not love moments like that?

….the JOY list on my cubicle cupboard door.  Seems people enjoy making it to the list—they take photos on their phones as evidence.  LOLOL

….oh…….and just to save me from ruining my reputation, the gal who called me a 'grumpy ass' this morning.  HEY……it was 6:30 and I was still a tad caffeine deficient.  :-/

Daily Reminder from the Fairy

A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while he gets to know something. --Wilson Mizner  

A good salesperson is usually a good listener. Being a good listener also helps in being a good parent or spouse, neighbor or friend. When we are truly able to hear what others are trying to say, we are better able to enter their world, and let them into ours.  

Listening to the collective wisdom of others helps us gain understanding and perspective on the world around us. It is not always easy to listen, because it's often our nature to want to be the center of attention. But listening is an art worth developing. It enriches our lives, improves our relationships, and helps us feel better about ourselves.  

The third eyelet

There was something more to the flag and flagpole that met the eye.  It was a part of moving into this neighborhood--everyone had one.  And everyone flew one--every holiday, without fail.
Don't think the old farts of the 'hood' didn't set me straight about that one.
OH yes.....both neighbors, to the left of us and across the street--the pole was in the garage--it came with the house, dontchaknow.  All I had to do...was make sure I put that sucker out--along with the rest of the neighborhood.    :-/

GOT it!  Sheeeeshhhh.

And I did, faithfully.  Every government holiday, no matter the weather, out I'd traipse.  Up went the flag...and down it went when the sunset.  And I wowed them with my knowledge of how to fold the flag, the ettiquite...what you can and cannot do with it.

And then there's the 'sentimental' value in the darn thing--three eyelets for hanging the flag.  One didn't exist until 9/11.  But Leroy made sure it was rigged for the tribute and honour--he even made the marble base, so I wouldn't have to hunt for the hole to place to pole in, year after year.
And every year on 9/11, it's been half mast. On Memorial Day, half mast until noon...  December 7th, Pearl Harbor day--half mast.....  I  know these things--it's what the neighborhood does.

So when it went missing one of the night's of the fair-- courtesy of some 'happy' intoxicated fella--yeah, I think it's fair to say they had no clue that it wasn't just a bit of metal with cloth attached to it.
They had no clue, and probably no concern about what it meant.

But I think it's fair to say my neighbor has some clue and a lot of concern about what it meant when he brought my flagpole AND flag--home this evening........almost a month after it went missing.....

It's back where it's suppose to be.
A bit dirty, but in tact.  With the eyelets exactly as Leroy had put them.
Amazing......  I've looked in yards.  I've looked on parkings where people put their trash or 'junk' they no longer want, awaiting for the trash collectors to do their thing.
But it wasn't there.

I'd pretty much stopped looking-- as had the neighbor to the left of me.........and then he spied it when a camper was moved that obscured him from seeing it before.  Of course he knew it was mine--Leroy had put that third eyelet in place for it.

It's home.  And I'm amazed.
A.M.A.Z.E.D.
Humbled, grateful and amazed.......

The 'other' meeting

Sunny California

I told her "Don't stress over it.....they won't starve."  "Cereal, sandwich stuff, chips and fruit....simple.  They'll fend for themselves."
It's gotta be tough.  Trying to figure out menus is tough, PERIOD.  Trying to do that when your last real taste of REAL food was better than 2 years ago.....beyond tough.

I told her not to stress.....make sure she's taking care of HER during their time together.  Have FUN....and just hug 'em a lot.

The Girl and her partner are taking the Bug to Disney with the Sis.  Two nights at Disney, breakfast with Minnie....the whole works.  And the to the sis' house and some beach time.  I've talked to the Girl about the Sis' limitations.  I've talked with the brother-in-law about not letting the Sis overload on all this.....they're going to have fun and an easy time, so don't let the Sis get all wrapped around the axle about it.

Why I have such a high need to protect her, pretty obvious...I love her and stress is just not a good thing for her.  Those long lasting effects from radiation get triggered by stress--and the she's in pain and struggling.
I hate the struggling bit, and I hate that helplessness I feel when it happens.

It's why I prepared the Girl for what she'll experience.
It's why I ran so much interference.
Oh, but Bug gets to go to Disney!!
And the Girl gets to see her Aunt and Uncle who love her dearly.
I'm envious.  LOL. Go figure!

Daily Reminder

Worry and Stress  

"Make plans but don't plan results." 

This is a simple phrase cautioning us against unnecessary worry and stress.  If our plans involve other people, we would be wise to work joyfully toward realizing our dreams, but we should not expect or worry if others do not want the same goals. Nor should we worry if others are not as enthused about our ideas as we are. We know that we can only change ourselves; we cannot force changes in others. 

Another cause of unnecessary stress in planning results comes from our ingrained habit of regarding ourselves as inadequate. All too often, those of us who make plans give up on ourselves when we predict the outcome of our dreams on the basis of our past experiences. 

We falsely conclude that because we failed or felt empty in the past, we'll most certainly not succeed in the future; thus, we quit too soon and rationalize our resignation with a "Why bother to try?" attitude.  

TODAY I will make plans but not plan results. I will work out my plan, one day at a time, knowing that my past performance is NOT an infallible indicator of my present or future success. I will look forward with hope, not despair.

Catching up is hard to do

He and I have been at it a long time.
Still, I felt honoured when he told me he'd come to the meeting cuz he wanted to see me and, after all, it was his home group once upon a time. I don't pick up on subtleties some times.
And, this after knowing him for eons.....sheesh!
So we talked for an hour afterwards.  The meeting after the meeting.  He and I had plenty of those! He needed one again.
And he might even be willing to show up at another support group....cuz he might need that given some circumstances in his life today.

Mostly it was good to just be in his company again.
We talk the same language, know each other enough to call the BS when the other is peddling it.
And once upon a time he sponsored me.
No wait--I think I sponsored him, even though he didn't know it.  LOL. Doesn't matter.  LOL

I think what matters is we need to do more of that, him and I.
And since he invited me to his humble acre "over there", I might haffta make it happen.
No, I will make it happen.
Cuz he might need a little following up on.

If I keep this up, I won't have to worry about having too much free time.

I dunno know how many that makes...
Five and a couple that I'm trying reallll hard to snag, cuz they need the snagging.
At least I won't be bored?

Oh, hold on.....I wasn't worried about that....it was lack of free time I was concerned about.

Oops?  :-/

Saving Time

TFTD

There are as many ways to live and grow, as there are people. Our own ways are the only ways that should matter to us. --Evelyn Mandel

Wanting to control other people, to make them live as we'd have them live, makes the attainment of serenity impossible. And serenity is the goal we are seeking in this life.  We are each powerless over others, which relieves us of a great burden.
Controlling our own behavior is a big enough job. Learning to behave responsibly takes practice. Most of us  have behaved irresponsibly for periods in our lives.
Emotional immaturity can be slow to depart, but every responsible action we take gives us the courage for another - and then another. Our own fulfillment is the by-product of the accumulation of our own responsible actions. Others' actions need not concern us.

Fetching

Corner lot

There's another 2" to our sidewalk tonight.  No, I didn't pour cement.  I did edge the darn thing, again.  Why does it feel like I just edged the darn thing last year?!  (Of course I didn't cuz I was still doing crutches and a brace, waiting on surgery.)
And we live on a corner.  So thr patio, driveway and sidewalk is just half the deal.  I still have the front sidewalk, driveway and paths to the porch and street.
Maybe tomorrow.  Maybe not.
It ain't going anywhere.
This on top of a shopping trip for groceries and birdie food and a walk around a craft store.  And feeding the plants....not that the plants look like they're starving.  They look like they have a problem with overeating.  LOL
And I buzzed himself's head (HE calls it a haircut.*snickering*).
And we went out for breakfast BEFORE we went from shop to shop.

Small wonder my arse is dragging.
Oh, but half of my sidewalk looks nice.
O
M
G
Half....
I'm too old for a corner lot.  LOL