penultimate day

This is how I celebrated today!

Mah po tou fu with beef, fluffy omellette, plain salad and rice *grinz*

What was I celebrating? The last of my assigments completed, Matt's exams over, a very successful meeting with my tutor, the thought of December, and finally being able to sleep properly tonight! There's still one more lesson tomorrow (bah, at 9am), but I thought some good food was in order (when is it not? hee) and took only 35 mins to cook-up.

Proceeded to watch episode 7 of Battlestar Galactica (Season 3)...episode 9 is out! And, there's another Battlestar fan in the corridor! We have late night Battlestar discussions, like "did you see Apollo's paunch" and how "Starbuck should stay single", haha the weird and the wonderful.

Went to see my tutor this afternoon regarding my essay proposal; thinking it would only take 10 mins, I came out of his office half an hour later. We went from talking about what I should focus on in writing to a lecturer in Leicester whom we both knew well to "Have you ever thought about this for your future?" to...well, ends up that I walked out of there agreeing to attend a 'reading weekend' (whatever that is), supposedly a mini 'retreat' starting tomorrow afternoon til sunday, taking place somewhere in the countryside (I don't even know where), with 16 other undergraduates from Philosophy, on Samuel Beckett. *swoons* yup, only reason why I signed up for it. I'm told we have to put up a mini performance on Saturday (oh dear....).

That means I shall have to forgo a gig Last Town Chorus is having in Birmingham on Friday night (with Lennie, tickets bought already, eek!), watching The Prestige with Annie on Saturday at the Arts Centre, and meeting JFK and SM in London on Sunday. noooo....arg...going to have to face the firing squad now and email JFK.

Matt, guess what, we're reading Rockaby, Not I, Play, Ohio Impromtu and Waiting for Godot!

Sleepy...but lots to do!

I'm a little teapot

See through
The pane
Touch, and make
No contact
Walk, and the whole cell
walks with you
Insipid

This is Bubble Boy at his peak of trepidity

Mood

The only knowledge I have in my head now is how to add 8 to a number from 1 to 12.
Not good, not good at all.

Wong Fei Hong and I set fire to the kitchen oven today. A real fire, with black choking smoke pluming out! I panicked when I saw it, and was ready to run round in circles with my arms waving wildly above my head, but Wong Fei Hong looked calmly at it, said, "Oh, fire" and proceeded to 'cut off the oxygen supply by leaving the oven door closed, since it's burning only on a limited supply of oil'. -_- (these Science people...) We had to stay among the thick fumes after that, for fear opening the kitchen door would set off the fire alarm in the corridor, causing the whole block to have to evacuate. Poor Amadeus and friend, they were having dinner too and had to remain with us in the smoke!

In mysterious ways

It's odd how God
Can make that break
And mend that bend
When things go out of hand

I thought I would be attending mass today with my head down, without saying a word to anyone, intending to leave immediately after mass because "I have so many things to do and I am so busy and I need to go back and I..." But then a girl from singapore I knew came to sit with me, and I couldn't help but smile, even though I didn't feel like smiling, but funny enough after I smiled I felt like smiling, and we started talking and sharing, and then I met a guy from bible study group and smiled and we started chatting and I realised I was not alone with the stress, and then someone came up to me and ask if I wanted to join the Legion of Mary and we started talking... After all, I stayed an hour talking and sharing and laughing with others as my heart grew lighter and lighter, and I know I could not have come out of my shell on my own strength.

Thank you Lord, for YOU make our burdens light, our joy true, our faith shine brightest in the dark.

of course, we are moderns

almost full moon I'm hungry but there's someone frying something oily which fills the whole corridor with grease and I have to stick my head out of the window so hair can air and don't smell like food which I so want to eat my own of course not theirs but I can't make it I don't know how I would have been able to motivate myself for 3 years what was I thinking yet still am thinking I just have to get this done this tooting thing done and if the fear of failure would get out of my face I would move at a faster pace. So be it.

How I survived, I don't know.

Thank God for God, and Fang Fang, and JFK, and Tam, and the Home Team, who were my pillars of support, foundations of strength, sources of true joy. Not the false laughter issuing from the ruins of orgies, decay of which stench I once again caught rising from the abyss of memories on this night. So thick I had to throw wide the window and gulp down the crisp night air; like a protective cloak, airy dream-catcher to save me from the nightmares of Christmases past.

Oh Lord, protect us evermore!

For those who are facing exams in the coming days,
(Especially Matt, Dre, Jen, but not forgetting many others!)
May you receive the Peace that will carry you through this stressful time,
the Strength to never give up,
the Faith to believe in yourself,
and the Hope that all will eventually be over!

Gambate!

Girls' night out

Siu Mei's Birthday cake!

At her place now, with Jon and Colleen (Leicester gang) =)

We were out in London the whole day: Dim Sum, Arcade, Coffee, and Evita!

Covent Garden at night...

They have the big Christmas tree up already!

And we're happy you're happy!

borrowed vehicle

All that I am, all that I ever was
Is here in your perfect eyes, they're all I can see
I dunno where, confused about how as well
Just know that these things will never change for us at all

lost in translation

Came up with a new easy-to-prepare dish for dinner today!

Something of an equivalent to chicken claypot rice:

Dice chicken breast and marinate in sesame oil/light sauce/pepper for 20 min.

Wash a cup of rice and add dark sauce/light sauce (and salt if nec.)/sesame oil into the right amount of water for rice to cook in rice cooker.

Add 4 cloves of crushed garlic and the chicken to the rice.

Pop it into the rice cooker until rice cooks!

To serve:

Good garnishing - pepper and fried shallots.

Fei (he's from China) was in the kitchen eating when I went in to get the cooked meal. So I sat down to eat at the table with him (usually I prefer to go into my room to eat, the kitchen is only enough for 6 people to stand in, and we have 12). We were talking about work and study in UK, when he offered me some of the food he had cooked: lo and behold, it was kung pow duck! (oops, here's Mel talking about food again!). It was really yummy, and he said it was his first time preparing duck, having only started cooking 2 months ago when he arrived here. Really amazed by his cooking skills, and ashamed I myself hadn't been so daring! Also, he had come from China not knowing much English - I thought it was very admirable he decided to do a course here: it would be like me studying Chinese literature!

Another corridor-mate, Linda (also from China), came in and proceeded to tell us she had just come from her pole-dancing lesson. Fay choked on his food then. I didn't really understand her mandarin, so she went on to demonstrate a few moves. He had stopped chewing, eyes about to pop out of their sockets; I nearly fell off my chair laughing.

Then Darran (a Hong-Kong British) walked in. Fei wanted to know whether guys could join the pole-dancing class, and what they would wear. Since he didn't know the english word for underwear, he proceeded to ask Darran what he wore to sleep.

Needless to say, I was nearly in tears from laughter by then.

What a meal!

chitchat

Woke up at 8.50am this morning, and the seminar on Maus was at 9am!!
Rush rush rush, I was so tempted to stay in bed and 'forget' I had a class, but because it's so unique to have one on a graphic novel I just couldn't miss it!
Turned up at 9.05am ready with apologies ( I DID brush my teeth!) and turns out half the class hadn't arrived yet, my tutor in fact looked grateful to those who walked in no matter what time it was.

Attendence just might have something to do with the fact that he set us 3 novels to read for this week?

Anyhow, had tea and a nice hour-chat with a couple of my course-mates after. And because they mostly were
a)in their late twenties
b)all (nearly) at the engagement stage with their partners
c)females
the topic for the day was marriage, having a house, maybe-babies. Okayyyyy, I had a nice cup of hot chocolate.

Back at twelve for a little lunch of pancakes with ham and cheese, got another class in 10 minutes at 1pm.

More stories!

Mauschwitz

This week's seminar reading for Literatures of War was Maus I and II, at least that's what it said on the reading list. So I headed down to the book store, found the author (art spiegelman), pulled the book out and saw...

Vat??!!

Flipping through the pages I got a bigger shock (note: this is what we, a class filled with students from 22 to 50 years of age, including ex-teachers/ administrators/ soldiers, will be discussing on wednesday after paying 9000 pounds):

I just love my course! *grinz*

By the way, this work did win the Pulitzer Prize, among others. I guess no dream is too huge!

Coventry and beyond!

Autumn Leaves! Technically, the temperature says it's winter already (high of 9 deg cel, low of 0 deg cel) but there's still some colour in life, thank goodness! Those are the blocks of my hostel, Tocil, just a 2 minute walk from lectures whoppee!

10th Nov: Went to West End, London, to watch Chicago with Yan yan! Didn't watch the Richard Gere/Catherine Zeta film, so I didn't know what to expect, but I must say the songs were catchy and the dancing great! Themes in the film were a little too dark for my taste, but it was a good production. Yan yan had seen the show in Japan and in US (different companies) and she says this one was the best =) See the plastic bag I'm holding? Full of Japanese goodies we got from a shop in London (including Pocky!)

Yan yan's my dear study-Tesco-musical-dinner-let's complain about work-buddy! She's doing a PhD in English Literature *kowtow to her* Specialises in 19th century fiction (power, right!) We met her friend in London that morning, who's halfway through her PhD in Gothic fiction. The intellectual meter is getting hot out here...

See this one? This is Mel, whose speciality is eating roast duck! In Chinatown, nonetheless. So happy because she's not eaten roast duck in 3 months ...we had it with xiao bai cai/ crabmeat/ shitake and fried rice. Too full to walk out after that, we stayed from 7 to 9pm gluping chinese tea.

Presenting...my room! The one furthest away from the noisy kitchen *grinz* I'm real serious as I thank God!

More to come! Was trying to fit in more pictures of Ho Fung's farewell at Leicester Square, but they wouldn't load. Ho Fung, if you're reading this, it means you're home safe and sound; enjoy your homecoming (I'm sure you will, British food ranks one of the lowest) 'cos we all will miss your jokes and great tenor voice!

Simply Insatiable

I want to...

read all the good books that have been written, eat the best cuisine from all over the world, join a multi-national corporation and be a high-powered executive and thus give my parents a comfortable life, have written at least one book that makes it to university syllables, teach, watch all the gothic and fantasy and detective and mystery films at the cinema, spend my time with my lover, rid the world of prejudice (especially racism), reach out to those who feel lonely,win the noble prize in literature very funny hahaha

all in all, to never regret how I spend my days

BUT

1. Isn't this all very self-centered?

2. Just how am I going to accomplish the above?
3. Things have a funny way of not turning out how you plan it i.e. God has a plan
4. Living is about making choices and balancing what we have (not what we don't) - then a voice in my head yells "life is about aiming for the stars too!"

*sigh*

To ponder: "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God"

got to read this day's entry from the bottom up

wanna hear more?

The green tortoise just looked at his Purpose Driven Life calender, which reads for the day:

Servants base their identity in Christ. Because they remember they are loved and accepted by grace, servants don't have to prove their worth. They willingly accept jobs that insecure people would consider 'beneath' them. One of the most profound examples of serving from a secure self-image is Jesus' washing the feet of his disciples. Jesus knew who he was, so the task didn't threaten his self-image.

whoooooooooooosh

Oh my gosh....you're kidding

It's 3 hours after I typed that last post, I'm just preparing to read today's reading, so I go on the 'Word Among Us' website. This is the first line I see:

What does it mean to humble ourselves?

In a state of shock now, when I recover I'll continue reading the reflection...

a time for everything

Humility: having a lowly opinion of oneself

Lowly: Humble in feeling or demeanour; not proud or ambitious

(Definitions from the Oxford English Dictionary)

OK, since definitions don't answer my question, how does one be humble? I don't believe it's about shortchanging yourself, making yourself out to be less than who you are. But then again, who are you? I may think I'm witty, intelligent, sexy (this is an example), but if 75% i.e. the majority of the people around me say otherwise, am I to believe that, and act likewise? If I don't do and think what they say, will I be labelled as 'proud' and 'arrogant'? I don't have to bother what 'they' say. But what if they're right?

As the wise Oracle would say,
"γνῶθι σεαυτόν"
Gnothi Seauton
Know Thyself

argh. Work in Progress.

Who else would have sat through Beckett's *breathe in* semi-neroutic, constant-verbiage gallop-pace-dialogue-with-stage-in-pitch-dark-but-for-the-mouth-three-men-in-pots-rockrockrock freakshow of a display

*pause*

for someone else?

(very much meaningfully) No one but you.

Trapped in wide open spaces
Often white faces
Caught in headlights
Bright eyes, poor deer

They speed and spit
Unaware of innocence ahead
Naivety crossing
Anger burning boats - Noah!

Then a scream and screech
stoplookoutletgoyoume
As two by two
Fades into dream

_______________________

Thought it was, perhaps, time again to inject some ambiguity into am biguous.
Woke up stunningly early today (the time was stunning, not me) and gulped down gallons of liquid (tow huay; now where else can one get this but in Mother Russia!) which fell into the well of an appreciative stomach that refused all dry crusty wholemeal stuff.
On Chapter 27 of Pat Barkers's Double Vision, and closing in. sigh. It's an end that's just as difficult to swallow as dry crusty wholemeal stuff. I was expecting more of the war, especially after Regeneration. New-found interest in violence - hence above poem - and the skins we have grown to benumb ourselves.

Back to the book.

yes. Being firmly grounded in the assertions of gender equality and women rights, we have unanimously agreed - woman's 10 to man's 1 vote- that matt shall do the talking.

heehee

just being cheeky.

Ireland was beautiful, being home is wonderful, and being with matt was, is, and always will be time precious to me.

Just back from Ireland!!

But before I say anything else. Jen, Jon, ShiHui, our lawyers, go check out this link from the uni website!!!It's your happy graduation grin on a collage!! muahahahahahaha I'm in the one with Jon, Siu mei and Ho Fung, Jon's in 3 of them (in his gown too, no fair!) and Jen has a close up with Her Baobei Camera.

heeheeheeheeheehee

hmm. 1.47am. caught football at 8. thinks it's all up to France now.
washed hair. 31 deg today. hair should dry fast but doesn't.
bored

cleaned grimy bath-tub until it was shiny pearl, kitchen sink and burnt-oil-coated grill until it was acceptable. by my standards anyhow. don't know what landlady will say. knows thyself has sworn never to be a housewife (got to luse your blain ah! go and work!) but there is an omph in triumphing over that glossy clean bacteria-less (less bacteria) surface.

but not everyday!! shock shock horror horror

cooked fresh pasta with bacon carbonara from scratch. on the day italia wins.
better find some snails for dinner tomorrow

decides to put up pictures from holiday during April. had so much fun then, didn't want it to end. would love to go back to Lake District.
If you know what "Hoooooo!" and "Seh seh seh!" mean you wouldn't need explanation for the guys' (frequent) actions.

til next time
nahnahnahnahnahnahnahnahnahnahnahnah, Arts Fac!
(crazy VJ pple. miss them!)

hmmm wait a minute, shouldn't it be 'our faith can't be broken, our hands can't be bound...'?

was walking off the tension 2 streets away from my house, where the main grocery stores are. Bumped into two of my lecturers, one with his long hair streaming behind him as he pedalled past in three-quarters, the other listening to his iPod.

hai. Kids nowadays...

'ya know who u are =)

Listening to Our Lives by The Calling.

May this be dedicated to those who have come down the same road thus far, especially they who are beginning a new journey.

Cause these are the days worth living
These are the years we're given
And these are the moments
These are the times
Let's make the best out of our lives...

See the truth, all around
Our faith can be broken
Our hands can be bound
But open our hearts
And fill up the emptiness
With nothing to stop us
Is it not worth the risk?
Yeah, is it not worth the risk?...

We can't go on
Thinking it's wrong to speak our minds
I've got to let out what's inside...

Ever tried holding your breath for 5 weeks?
It feels so good letting it out I almost believe I've sucked in helium.

But it's not over yet...
hoooooooooooooxiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
heeheeheeheeheeheeheeheehee
Thank You Lord!!

He lives in you
Hela hey mamela [Hey, listen]
He lives in me
Hela hey mamela [Hey, listen]
He watches over
Everything we see
Into the water
Into the truth
In your reflection
He lives in you

aggression digression regression?

thank goodness for witty commentators! Or else I'd have fallen asleep on the couch...

Here's a take of them having a go at Switz vs. Ukraine:

'Watching the game has been like watching crisps (potato chips/koropok) dry up'

(at the start of the extra 30 min) 'PLEASE, just hurry up and get to penalty shoot-out!'

'Usually we want either side to win. With Switz we're neutral'
(haha tongue-in-cheek)

Was surprised Shevchenko missed the first penalty shot; hasn't Chelsea bought him? He played really well, probably just didn't have the back-up he needed which ended up in the grid-lock by the 90th. He's quite cute too. ahahahahaha

Yesterday's Portu-Holland game more interesting. Less, er, neutral. Yellow cards were flying everywhere, and apparently the game equalled the World Cup record for bookings (16) and broke the record for red cards. Deco and Costinha dismissed, so they won't be seen playing against England. Which gives England a whole load more chances to edge forward, unlike previously thought.

So next up: Italy vs. Ukraine, England vs. Portugal

One of the most magnificent and memorable places: The Duomo (cathedral) at Pisa.


King of endless worth
I'm sorry Lord for the thing I've made it
because it's all about you

Dearest friends
Thanks for your well-wishes and blessings and prayers the past months, especially during the last two. To those who have interceded and intervened before I arrived at the stage of shaving off all my hair (and eyebrows; though nothing could prevent me from committing the drastic-womanly-stress-compelled act, as Jon calls it, of cutting a fringe)...yes, to those who were there, my most heartfelt . There isn't a word I know to adequately express that gratitude.

After the completion of exams, four friends and I went on an Italy escapade - I got back not 3 hours ago.


Yes Hil, Matt, Fang, Alex, Dre, Dan (and annonymous), your messages did not go unnoticed nor failed to brighten up my week! I just couldn't reply them - Jon and I, the internet junkies, were starving from broadband linkage and had to find an Italian internet cafe to squeeze out fifteen minutes of English reading material, which ended up time enough only for checking mail.

10 days of Firenze-Roma-Pisa...and we saw the Pope!! Albeit his side-profile and his arm (boy, were we excited with just that glimpse) during the papal audience last Sunday. The sense of family when the thousands gathered at St Peter's Square cheered at his first words (we cheered too, like fans for a supersuperstar) was heart-warming, uplifting; and that was merely a gathering on an Ordinary Sunday. Pictures to come soon, and I'm going to try and load a short clip we took of the Pope's speech! hee dear old Benedict.














From city sights














To hills and dales

















To Germany vs Poland (Jon Siu mei Neda)


To Gerrie our mum and wise one who woke the earliest to prepare a spread for breakfast every morning (mortadella ham, sweet tomatos, mozzarella cheese, german sausages, gorgonzola cheese, soya bread, baguette, all cut up and laid out professionally), Siu mei our great tour guide and amazing planner and much needed accoutant and banker of the group (who booked the apartments and knew Florence like the back of her hand), Neda our fashion consultant and make-up specialist, Jon our referee and porter and resident jester and gamemaster and peacemaker and fellow pig-out-er; thanks for the great time!

The whole gang round the mulberry bush 

My favourite pair

The past month, there were

Beautiful mornings...

great days... 

lonesome noons... 

wonderful sunsets...

and creepy nights. 

I 

grew... 

my... 

flowers. 

Jen and I spent the time...

feeling chilly... 

getting terrible eye-bags....