I normally post beautiful, fashionable things on my Instagram and on Facebook. Food, fashion, and other things I enjoy like nice clothes, shoes, holidays - but never anything deeper. Never anything more thought provoking… Because in my line of work, there's so much confidentiality issue that I can't really discuss my day, or how I feel on my Facebook, nor could I post too much information / pictures that reveal too much about the things I deal with at work on my Instagram. So over time, they have become an avenue of my fashion addiction.
But that is not the real me.
I would like to believe the real me has more substance - as I browse through old blog posts I have written. None of it is about fashion, or designer wear. It's because that's not why I do what I do. My love for my job and profession is not so I can go and buy nice things to make me feel fulfilled.
The real me is a lot deeper than that. I often reflect on my life and wonder if I am here for a greater purpose. And I am glad that although I'm no famous professor, my job allows me to touch peoples' lives everyday. Whether it's helping to bring their new bundle of joy to the world, keeping them alive so that they could see their loved ones, or sometimes, just being a shoulder to cry on… I believe that I am put into this world to do my job, and to do it well…. because even though I refer to it as my job, it's not it is. It is a huge part of me. It's who I am.
My husband said that I'm a giver. And I don't think he's too wrong about me. I always try to give my best in all that I do, because I enjoy seeing a smile on my patient's face at the end of it. Or a little thank you card with my name on it. It's wonderful to feel that sense of being appreciated. Whether it's at work, or at home.
I went on the "rampage" according to hubby, cleaning the house today. Because you know, how one thing leads to another - vacuuming, that led to changing all the sheets at home, that led to cleaning the bathroom, that led to doing the laundry etc etc. Hubby came home and gave me a huge hug, followed by a big THANK YOU, and now, he's preparing dinner :)
So even though my life hasn't been the cruisiest and easiest in the recent months, I'm thankful. I miss my family lots. I miss my grandma lots - to a point that sometimes, I still wake up from my dreams with tears in my eyes. I know I may not be the best in keeping in touch - emailing and making phone calls, but it doesn't mean that you guys are forgotten.
I love each and everyone of you with everything that I have, and I hope - every single day, that you guys are happy too.
Whether you're at home, on a holiday somewhere else, travelling the world, stuck at work till late, having a bad day sometimes, or even up in heaven…. wherever you may be - that you are happy too.
I miss all of you, every single day - but I just want to let you guys know, that I am happy. And that I will continue to work hard, and live my life, to make each and everyone of you proud.
