sigh

I really need to get over this. It's been four years, and I'm getting sick of this.

It has to end some where . And somehow...

I guess most of the rants will end up here.

Sometimes I wish someone can tell me what went wrong with me and Sonic edge.

Whenever I try to talk about this, it's always a closed door I get. While everyone else in that group is happily ever after with their gatherings and etcs, not many people are open to acknowledge the problems in the place. Not exactly agree to disagree - more like sweeping the dust under the carpet.

The most sore part I always felt was that I never felt accepted or given the opportunity to be accepted by people.
It's like the alike attract, leaving everyone else outside the group apart.


I kept staying back hoping things will change, hoping I will be part of something.
It was just plain wishful thinking all along.

I doesn't really matter now that I'm out of it all. I'm only sad knowing who are the people are genuine and who are the people who just pays you lip service and go on with their lives without you.



Sometimes I'm quite lost. I don't know whether if this is something I should resolve before I move on, or just move on all together because that thing isn't necessary to be resolved.

And it still feels like a burden. I don't know why....