o_O

This is by far the most wierd thing that ever happened (to me).

I was on the cab from Suntec back to office. While the cab stopped near the traffic light just infront of the museum, I quickly flash out my phone to capture the moment. Then, a couple walked by. In between trying to focus on taking the photo and looking at the couple passing by, I noticed that the man was my secondary school form teacher for 2 years.

And he hasn't change a single bit. Gawh.

And then, you get to see people who you havent seen around for the longest time and yet seeing them in the most wierd place or situation.

===================

Having to sleep only for 3 hours can be quite a health hazzard.
Makes me wonder how many more years do I have to be in this industry.
One of those love-hate relationships...

Driving license, Car, europe vacation? In my wildest dreams....

bad memory

Sometimes its good to have bad memory. Dont need to remember certain details.

Other times, I will kena knock. Especially for forgetting my classmate/ex-boyfriend from poly year one & two.
It's nice that we are still friends, chatting and crapping. After all those turbulent times...

Sick for nearly a week. I'm almost near to not taking MC for one whole month...

emo ... all the way...

I can listen to Mae again, again and again. And I dont get sick of listening to it.

Everytime when I sing out loud the lyrics, it feels like everything inside me pours out. Those feelings that I can never put words to suddenly takes form -in the words of the lyrics.

I hate hormonal changes. Every time it happens, I would feel so mellow and emo.

Emo indie rock rawks.

I know God hears my cries, my laughs, my pain, my tiredness. And His peace ... how precious...
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Embers And Envelopes
Mae


Embers And Envelopes
We write to apologize.
We ask to look past life as it goes by.
I know you have sacrificed time,
life, love, time to fly.
Please consider all things right,
forgiveness will be the thing that gets us by.
I know to have something like this
broken is hard to fix.

Embers, we're burning bridges down.O
Envelopes stuffed with feelings found.
To write this down as means to reconcile.(x2)

We write to patch things up,
maybe not to agree but to proclaim love.
Let's look ahead and then we'll see the one
whose glory never ends.
And based on that we'll see,
there'll be room for change, but gradually.
I know to have something like this
broken is hard to fix.

If all is said and done and over,
if we don't have to, we're not gonna.
Make the change, it's worth the try.
What's broken can be fixed tonight.

*copyrights reserved by the artist mentioned.

old friend...

An old friend called me on my mobile while I was on my way home. Out of the blue. Someone some what close to be since primary school. In fact, the only one from primary school to secondary.

She disappeared for almost 3-5 years. The last I spoke to her was when she called from Australia and told me she is studying there. I think I could have been still upset with her back then.

It is kinda strange of friends calling me out of the blue. The last I had was my poly classmate who called me out for dinner, just to introduce me to some "business opportunity" for a health product that he is representing of some sort. Not a good experience to begin with - dinning with an agenda.

I hope my old friend sincerely wants to catch up.

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something about nothing

"I love talking about nothing. It is the only thing I know anything about."
Oscar Wilde

Everyday there is always something new around the corner to learn.

I learn that sometimes one can look too much into things with the knowledge one owns, and only to be in peril as such knowledge can be like seeing through a doorhole. And I am in the habit of doing so, unknowingly.

"“Information is not knowledge." - Albert Einstein

I love quotations - words of thoughts from people who took time to ponder and pour out into words their thoughts ...
http://en.thinkexist.com/quotations/knowledge/

--------------

I woke up today at peace. Knowing what and how I should go about today. Knowing myself even better. With the assurance that who I am now is who I should be - values, principles and more. None of which to imply that I am perfect. But at least I can say that with the peace of God.

happy!

I rushed home today just to eat homecooked CURRY!

Miss the taste so much... so excited!

Got some pics, will upload soon.

Beehoon was yummy too. yummmmy.

Thank God for moms - they cooks such excellent cusines. Better than resturants.

Hopefully one day I can cook like the way my mom does. >_<

something

There is something sinister whenever I try to make the effort to go cell.

Okay, more like this - whenever I make a resolution of some sort to focus more on God, something happens either to myself or people close to me.

My sis called me. Told me that my cousin called and inform her that my dad fainted again. He's discharged and home resting. A passer-by found him and called for ambulence.

And precisely today I choose to go back to cell after a month of time to myself.

How strange is that.

I'm awefully worried now about a few things. The door is not open yet for me to say something.

At least something decent came out from my so called godpa's mouth after I chided him for being insensitive.
over msg er::
wah u mean satan work hard
anyway u can claim victory over him

how im feeling now...

MAE -

"This Is The Countdown"

Are you getting tired?
I think we’ve gone, and lost the fire.
But I don’t wanna fight anymore,
I’ve had enough, of this town.

I can see the signs,
and I can read between the lines.
But I don’t know what we were fighting for,
I’m just trying, to breakout.

I’ve been waiting for something,
I’ve been sitting for too long.
I’ve been waiting but oh tonight,
this one last try, goes on and on and on

You put your nets out,
but still you chose to do without.
the only way to catch the butterfly,
is never waiting for the wings, and

As seasons bring change,
and as the seconds fade away.
I still don’t know why we were holding on,
But I’m still trying, to breakout.

Should've known better than to listen.
When the dreams and the words started falling apart.

Should've known i would've hit the ground running.

Did you think that the night would posses us,
Take us over like the rain that’s falling down.

Did you notice when the clock stopped running.

Running…

This is the countdown; You see our time is running out.
I tread to stay above the waterline,
but never taking off the weights that
keep us stuck here. In the comfort, and the fear.
I’ll never know what we were fighting for,
but I’m still looking to breakout.

really? Really!

The more I talk to God's people, the more I see the magnificence of His love & grace.

That when He speaks, and it is something that He wants you to know, you'll definitely hear it.

Of course, when you are ready to receive that is.

There were so many times that I've had the prompting of the Holy Spirit on certain matters. And yet I let my thoughts or rational override them and continue on running in the wrong course of direction.
And God in His mercies held on to me and lead me back to the right path.

Long and winding road.

And the school of hard knocks has to come in place before I am so driven up the wall that I will come falling in front of God and tell Him how desperate I am.
The only regret I have is that it took so long for me to see this truth, and things just keep happening until this truths is etched in my mind and heart.

It is scary to know that I havent *really* got my identity right and well-founded with God. Thank God though that after I received Christ as my Lord & Saviour that did I know that all that I tried to do was to be accepted by people. I work twice as hard in school to avoid failling exams. I wanted to do well to get my parent's acceptance. I used to dress up so that my boyfriends back then would love me more?

And I forget that God made me just the way I am.

No wonder I got so drained out with people. Unmet expectations on myself, and chanelling this expectation to others who have disappointed and failed me.

....

I don't want to be contended to be in a fluffy place in my spiritual life with God.

...

I've got some answered prayers recently. I'm definately not ready for anything now. God is really more than enough for me now. I just want to focus on Him alone. To know His word, to study, and to love it so much and deeply that I really KNOW my God!

Honestly disappointed, but nevertheless if it is His will that out of this I learn something more about myself - let it be so that this event be a reminder of what I've prayed. And He does listen to prayers! Amen!

Side effects of long weekends...

Long weekends are great.

Of course, the consequences of long weekends are emails flooding from you-have-no-idea-where-I-thought-everyone-is-holidaying.

And followed by demands from clients asking for mountains and seas.

Take The Lead....

Love this part where Pierre had to explain to both Rock & LaRhet the concept in ballroom dancing.

I had to replay the trailer so many times to write the following down:

(Rock & LaRhet) trying to move at the same time)
Pierre : no no no
Man leads, it is the women's job to follow

LaRhet: oh so, if he gets to lead, he gonna thinks he's boss?

Pierre : oh but he's not
The man proposes a step, it is the women's choice to accept the proposal
both (lead & accept) takes as much strength to lead

specimen x

Here we find specimen x - a photo of a monitor screen.

This is my desk. Unfortunately, no matter how I pack the desk, it will always end up this messy.

Sunny Day, Rainy Day

Being a singletons is great (so far). Honestly.

I went to Parkway Parade in the morning to get contact lens prescriptions and change the lens for the specs. Humid morning, but nevertheless a great sunny morning to begin with. Listened to Jazz for a change. Though the bus was packed and stuffy, I tried not to get my mood dampen by the environment. Besides, the journey to Parkway was not that long.

The staff ( Sam if I remember correctly) at the spectacles shop was nice. Very professional and good service. I will have to wait for about 3 days to a week for the contact lens to arrive, and send the specs in later to get the lens changed. Apparently, my day vision (6/12) is much better than night (6/9?) due to astigmatism. At night, my vision will not be as sharp - which I have observed that this is true, and the staff's diagnosis was right. ;D

Tired to look around for some new clothes and nothing came up. I walked around aimlessly for a while. Ended up buying 100+ worth of DVD's/VCDs. There was 30-40% discount off Animes - I had to get Patlabor! The show is about these huge robots that became defense tools for the Tokyo Police.

I came back home and watched Havana Night. Feel a bit cheated as other than the Cuba/Latin songs and dance here and there, I think I will rather stick to Take The Lead. Its just so hot hot hot!
Havana Night had a safe storyline. There were a few scenes with dancing techniques. Overall just pass only lah.

Setup Huo Yuan Jia for my folks to watch. Maybe tonight or tomorrow when my folks are bored, I'll run I Not Stupid 2 VCD for them to watch.
============

I woke up today feeling very happy and relaxed. The precept homework is still intact in the folder, website is not sliced yet, workflow presentation is still not completed. Loving the times of walking around alone, going to shops and sitting down for makan and observing the crowd around. Nice.

I am reminded again of a song (hillsong I think), something about "Lord You're more than enough for me". I've asked a friend last year if the good Lord is more than enough for him in his life. The answer was that he think so. (He has been inactive from church now - hat is another issue though..)

Every year I ask myself if the LORD almighty is more than enough for me. Have I reached the staged where "Blessed Be Your Name, You give and take away, my heart will choose to stay, and Blessed Be Your Name"?
Let me not be a child who is too complacent in the position she is in, and learn this lesson of total obedience and surrendering to the One who gave a second chance. And He is still giving second chances to those who turn around to seek His heart.

I miss this joy in my heart. It has been quiet for some time, and now it is bursting forth. How marvelous is the God of Abraham, Jacob and Isaac, in His abudant mercies and grace, save someone like me and gave me even more than I can imagine and too much for me to fathom. The peace knowing that all is good in His time. And above my needs and wants, He just want me to follow Him and know His heart.

Concentrating on God, Precept & my good pals, family, and myself!

24x7 christian

I've been feeling like a 4 hour christian for the last few years. While the other 8 hours were spent at work, I felt nothing like a christian.
Working for almost 3 years plus so far made me think a lot about things. My values, integrity and responsiblities at work. Talking to people recently made me realise how far I was from what I should have been
At times when I thought I was doing it right turns out that I was actually following the crowd of being politically right. I used to be able to stand up and be myself and do what it right. And then I conformed to the world by doing it their way because that was "no choice" in their words.

And thanks to God who in His mercy reveals this to me through recent incidents. If not , I would probably have to continue running around in the same spot but never finding out why.

Things are happening, and I can only say its a season I will not miss.

==============

Really nice & blessed to hang out with friends who which we can just be ourselves and laugh things off - being real and honest about ourselves.

Having to go through so many things in the span of the last 4-5 years, I've shut myself off from people to guard myself from the hurt, especially in the state of vulnerability. Having to feel sub-normal, having perspectives or see things that others do not has alienated me from a lot of things. On my part, I do have misgivings on some things as well.

My confidence level was all time low this year. I've dreaded the weekends (and even weekday nights) for it would always be a lonely affair. Walks in town or malls is plain torture - couplings everywhere with cuddles and kisses.

And now? While I havent fully resume taking up the image that Christ has promised for my life, the small baby steps now has helped much. Learning how to cope and deal with the past, moving on to the present and future, and seeing that indeed I can move on. I feel so much happier these days.

I feel so much happier. God has all the answer to pain/problem - and its all there in His word.