Five lessons to make you think about the way we treat people.

1. First Important Lesson - Cleaning Lady.

During my second month of college, our professor gave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions, until I read the last one: "What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?"

Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name? I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank. Just before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade.

"Absolutely," said the professor. "In your careers, you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say "hello." I've never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Dorothy.

2. Second Important Lesson - Pickup in the Rain

One night, at 11:30 pm, an older African American woman was standing on the side of an Alabama highway trying to endure a lashing rainstorm. Her car had broken down and she desperately needed a ride. Soaking wet, she decided to flag down the next car. A young white man stopped to help her, generally unheard of in those conflict-filled 1960s. The man took her to safety, helped her get assistance and put her into a taxicab.

She seemed to be in a big hurry, but wrote down his address and thanked him. Seven days went by and a knock came on the man's door. To his surprise, a giant console color TV was delivered to his home. A special note was attached.

It read: "Thank you so much for assisting me on the highway the other night. The rain drenched not only my clothes, but also my spirits. Then you came along. Because of you, I was able to make it to my dying husband's bedside just before he passed away. God bless you for helping me and unselfishly serving others," Sincerely, Mrs. Nat King Cole.

3. Third Important Lesson - Always remember those who serve.

In the days when an ice cream sundae cost much less, a 10 year-old boy entered a hotel coffee shop and sat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in front of him. "How much is an ice cream sundae?" he asked.
"Fifty cents," replied the waitress.

The little boy pulled his hand out of his pocket and studied the coins in it. "Well, how much is a plain dish of ice cream?" he inquired. By now more people were waiting for a table and the waitress was growing impatient.

"Thirty-five cents," she brusquely replied. The little boy again counted his coins. "I'll have the plain ice cream," he said.

The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on the table and walked away. The boy finished the ice cream, paid the cashier and left. When the waitress came back, she began to cry as she wiped down the table. There, placed neatly beside the empty dish, were two nickels and five pennies. You see, he couldn't have the sundae, because he had to have enough left to leave her a tip.

4. Fourth Important Lesson - The Obstacles in Our Path.

In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock. Some of the king's wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by and simply walked around it. Many loudly blamed the King for not keeping the roads clear, but none did anything about getting the stone out of the way.

Then a peasant came along carrying a load of vegetables. Upon approaching the boulder, the peasant laid down his burden and tried to move the stone to the side of the road. After much pushing and straining, he finally succeeded. After the peasant picked up his load of vegetables, he noticed a purse lying in the road where the boulder had been.

The purse contained many gold coins and a note from the King indicating that the gold was for the person who removed the boulder from the roadway. The peasant learned what many of us never understand! Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improve our condition.

5. Fifth Important Lesson - Giving When it Counts.

Many years ago, when I worked as a volunteer at a hospital, I got to know a little girl named Liz who was suffering from a rare and serious disease. Her only chance of recovery appeared to be a blood transfusion from her 5-year-old brother, who had miraculously survived the same disease and had developed the antibodies needed to combat the illness. The doctor explained the situation to her little brother, and asked the little boy if he would be willing to give his blood to his sister.

I saw him hesitate for only a moment before taking a deep breath and saying,"Yes I'll do it if it will save her." As the transfusion progressed, he lay in bed next to his sister and smiled, as we all did, seeing the color returning to her cheeks. Then his face grew pale and his smile faded. He looked up at the doctor and asked with a trembling voice, "Will I start to die right away?"

Being young, the little boy had misunderstood the doctor; he thought he was going to have to give his sister all of his blood in order to save her.


"Work like you don't need the money, love like you've never been hurt, and dance like you do when nobody's watching."

Don't dream a life, live a dream!
.....go to sleep then.....

the 3 days i have spent at harvest caterin has been wonderful. mostly because i get to roam around with ray(the driver) and not to mention being consistently surrounded by foodstuffs and goodies. although there are strict unmentioned rules about us pilfering the foodstuff, accidents do happen. like how? when super delicious chicken gravy accidentally get spilled over your careless hands when disposing off. heavenly...even when its quite cold.

well the best part would be to roam around when u work. hehe...i am beginning to envy myself getting all the good jobs in the market. my first was a toys promoter. job scope play with toys and then at the same time promote about it. now, my job is a cater-er boy. job scope to roam around singapore and get my job done. hehe...good eh : )

jus yesterday i was havin some chit chat session with ray. not that i have ran out on topics to talk, but i jus wanted some advice on the affairs of the heart. of late, i have been having quite abit of trouble myself. so i thot of seeking some advice and hopefully get some ground rules of the game.

little did i expect a full lecture into such matters. he went on and on about his experience and started to dish out advice. NOT that i disliked it, i quite enjoyed it, till one point in his lecture. at that point, my brain had formed up a picture of wat ray had said.

he made out the whole love affair thing to be very battle-like. with the whole anaylsis about present stats and tactics. (wondering) shld i continue to spill the beans on such classified information? hmmm...better not. anyway, he taught me quite some tacts and i picked up a few of them. the rest of the tacts he imparted i jus dun feel quite comfort with them. anyway to him, its a raving battle going on.

althought i have keen interest in the art of war, but it doesnt mean i am pro-war. and i certainly not very into turing the affairs of the heart into another battlefield. i am more keen to treating it as a game, RPG adventure game. with limited resources, stages to clear and sub-plots, mysteries and quests to complete.

the problem was that i had littel knowledge about the rules of the game. things like basic assumption in this game that people make in this game. one very specific basic assumption, holding of hands. i didnt know that it meant a union of two lovebirds till recent years only. so i guess there more to be learnt. and oh, while learning that, self understanding is also very important.

like i have said, i was recently submerged into certain problem. recently, i have been ....oh well nvmind...

jus watched a movie file sent by a fren. (sadden),(upsetted),(disgusted) for now...

the clip was about animal fur. not those few mins about how people waltz up and down the catwalk with fur. and no its not about all those beautiful people wearing fur. definitely not about people being stark naked protesting about animal fur.

its about how the traders get their fur, minus the hunting. well first impression about animal fur, was that it was not exactly a good thing. because for me, i have always understood by one idealogy. the idealogy was that although u profit from the things of others, the other party might suffer because of the loss of it. AND since everything was originally in balance at very first instance, live creatively with things you have and enjoy even with the absence of certain things in life. so i never had that great amount of empathy or emotional attachment to topics like animal fur.

reading the attached message, that no one seemed to be able to finish the clip. that devilish mechanism started to rotate. it appeared to be a challenge made out to me. at that moment in time, i thot to myself how hard can watching a 16+min clip be? let the truth be known...i self-terminated the clip at around 8+min. through this while i was staring at the timer, and wondering when is it goin to end?

here marks the point of no return...below i shall put my vocab to the test to best describe what i saw on the clip. however, for those who live in the world of Happily ever after, i suggest you turn back and forget about this post. this is not a taunt nor a challenge, and do not let your balls think for you.

i saw the most thot provoking scene in my 20+ years. i saw the skinning of LIVE(as in breathing and alive and heart-beating) animal. there appears to be a few animal 'featured' in this clip, but i got as far as viewin one of the animal and the beginning of the ending of another.

for those ignorant, this is how the whole process of skinnin went. first, the human will pick the animal from its cage. the animal is then set in the upside-down position, whereby the head is facing the ground and caught by the tail. next, the human will SWING the animal, with a deadly destination for its head. the swinging when on for several minutes on the timer. the lucky ones get to die from it, the more unlucky one continues on with the torture.

with my super limited knowledge about animal, i was unable to tell wat animal was this even after staring it for few mins. thus i clearly did not understand the next move took by the human. he went on to remove ONLY the front two legs of the four-legged animal with an axe and a makeshift timber as chopping board. the animal did look something like a raccoon when the close-up happened. jus then, the image of a man with two chopped-off hands jus super-imposed onto the scene.

the human then proceeded to the hind legs of the animal. from the hind legs, he drew lines along the leg area with a knife. the skin was then quickly torn till it reached the mid-body area. the animal's behind is totally exposed in a pale white color. and you wish that this nightmare would end around now.

the human would then hang the animal's tail on a hook, again subjecting the animal in an upside-down position. the skin is again pulled off the animal. imagine pulling a shirt off someone, keeping in mind that the shirt would be attached to that person and you MUST get it off. the tugging persisted till the fur gave way and slipped off the animal. any other difficult areas to get fur off the animal would be performed by scissors. the animal was then left on a cart, together with its pre-decessors.

the clip also specifically zoomed in on one of the particular animal. this animal was particularly was alive throughout the entire process. how did i know? after being toss onto the cart, the animal's breathing was still obvious. i basically continued and endured a little while longer to see abt the same process repeating itself. this time on a fox.

throughout this clip, i definitely got a RUDE AWAKENING. while watching the clip you can chose to terminate the gruesome clip at anytime. however, imagine this was animal was suddenly changed to yourself. THE NIGHTMARE JUS GOES ON. ok, so i am not those macho meatballs claiming to be fearless and self-proclaiming that it is the natural law of the fittest that survive.

WTF!!! all that nightmare, so that a freaking BITCH can jus show off that few seconds to her F'ed up bunch of frens. or so that some weird BITCH who jus cannot wait to flaunt of her husband's wealth. or some freako BITCH who jus want that glam of best dress under that limelight. WTF!!!

(composing self) ok...jus have to let off steam.

i thot today would be as normal and as boring as any other day. hehe, guess no one really know how the future is goin to turn out.

morning, jus before the lessons, i met ven, aka 'mei mei'. like me she is a libra too. a very confused and indecisive libra too. didnt meet up and talk to her for quite a long time already. jus glad that she is still so ever-bubbly. thanks ven, guess that mornin talk did kinda bring a good start to my day. : )

later on, the usual came on stage. school followed by home. although i ended school early, jus didnt felt like studying. even though i have AEM test this comin thursday. jus totally wasted my day away idling. till when my uncle visited, he was my mother's elder brother.

he always had kinda of prob with alcohol, you can say he's a alcoholic. however, that jus wont be totally true. he doesnt jus live on alcohol, he's jus a very lonely soul who tries to seek comfort in alcohol. cant blame him for lookin in the wrong direction, people do make mistakes. he had been drinking before he came over, and when he drinks there's no one else in the world he gives a damn. Well, the good thing is he still responses to my maternal grandmother, aka his mother, and he is not violently inclined. the best thing is that he speaks off his mind. in this dog eat dog world, speaking off your mind could jus be the best treasure anyone can find in this modern jungle. well the best this nephew could do was to sit and listen attentively, being rude and abnoxious was jus not in my set of genes. he started to drink since 14, and he's like minimally 50+++.

jus then he decided to give a call to his mother, for reasons that only he can fathom. both of us were then summoned to her house. hmmm...guess grandmother wants to give a damage control, because seriously no one can predict wat my drunked uncle might do. although it might be nothing seriously drastic, but guess grandmother jus wants to keep a close eye.

ok...finally after long and tedious foreplay here comes the main highlight of this post.

my cousin(the eldest son of that uncle) was living with my grandmother. he jus got promoted to being a father this few days. so naturally, when i was over i SIMPLY HAD TO pay a visit to my new niece. however, i also have this thing about babies.

its not like i hate them, but i prefer then to be at least 1 and above. why? their fragility totally freaks me out, even their cries can set me into a state of panick(which does not always happen, even if i see a live spark in front of me). so i kept my distance and admired that cute little creation. haha...yar all those tingly feeling and that peaceful feeling.

all of a sudden, the alarm was raised. DIAPER CHANGE. oh yea...wat else...SHIT. first sight of baby shit LIVE, upclose(still at quite a distance) and personally STUNNED. the shit was a green brown mixture. upon confirmation, its totally expected. upon further curiosity, babies actually would clear black bowels before clearing the green-brown mix. well, the resident baby experts(my grandmother and mother) have actually no idea abt it. anyhow, stayed through the whole diaper change and cleaning arse rountine. the memory of the shit comin out of her arse is still vivid. then it jus occurs to me, its one thing to shit your shit and another to watch someone shit their shit. (sick)

the usually computer freak cum IT fanatic cousin of mine, now permanently resides not at the desk of his super-mod computer, but at the side of his princess. i guess its the cobwebs for the computer of his. you can actually tell, by the long empty stares into his daughter. haha...i guess this is where fatherly love is always mysterious and yet equally great as motherly love. hmmm...guess its the best time to ask him to give up his computer to me....(grin)

was suddenly in a very queer mood today. suddenly became so into helpin people, do their timetable cum schedule. while till today i have actually got my own one. haha...wonder how the person might react after lookin at this post. haha...actually nothing much to fear, so far by the record, libra are the BEST at meting out good advice. by good, i mean beneficial and helpful advice. well sure hope the new timetable helped, like it shld.

on the topic of this, jus a reminder, dun over-commit or over-stretch yourself. i can understand the greed of doin everything and being everywhere. however, jus remember, even superman have times that he can only regret in despair. still not convinced?! look at it this way, when u over-stretch yourself over a period of time, fatigue sets in. when fatigue hits you, its not goin to be a tap on the shoulder nor a pat in the back. jus imagine the amount of things that you will be EVEN more unable to complete.

by now some really UN-convinced readers, might jus point out that i have no relative position to argue that a time-table is really essential in curbing possible fatigue and burnout. because i dun even have a time-table. WELL...i am a LIBRA, and this is my advice take it or SUFFER.

today while planning for this person, i also let out a VERY DEEP DARK secret that only that person will know before this post comes to live. hmmm...rite now still pondering whether or not to write.

(ponder... ... ... ...)

guess not...since its my DEEP DEEP DARK secret, guess i will jus let it be. as to why i spilled the beans today, no idea. anyway, was blabbing quite abit today. was sighin abt my UNTRUE playboy image, JUS because i seems to be very 'flowery flowery' talker. anyway...there was plenty spilled that looks like an accident on the highway...ugly.

jus started a new job yesterday, working as a catering boy for Harvest Catering Services.
first impression?...none.
how i got this job?...thru a secondary sch fren, her bf's biz.
status after 1st time there? suddenly felt all my muscles coming to life.
where is it? the main kitchen was somewhere in kitchen.
amazed? amazed by the organisation of work and the surprising lack of it sometimes.
y quit the last job? you cannot argue that the last job was not paying well. it pays 6.5/hr on wkends. but the sales target is the one i cannot handle. sorta crumbling under, so might as well leave. dun like to be consistently hounded for such stuffs. details, Details, DETAILS...:P
goin to start working again today. hope there are enough pieces of me to survive today, to go to class tomorrow.

while on the job, i was thinking again. the word 'Retribution' came to mind. well, look at it this way. since young i have a very good mother, so good that she would take care of all 'rubbish' in my life. things like clearing up after each meal, cleanliness of the household etc.. you know, the typical award winning asian housewife.

so wat was so retributive about my work at harvest catering? the clearing up after everyone. imagine not clearing up for abt 20++ years and maybe beyond. now i have to pay back every single thing, in multiples. there is at least 20-30 at each catering, and i have more than jus one catering each day. you do the maths. hehe...i hope i do enough credits to last me a lifetime. :)

oh...by the way, giving my thanks and appreciation to QiuYan and KeYuan for givin me a chance at harvest. appreciate the people at harvest for guiding me along. the ropes of the trade wasnt that hard, the harder part was the teamwork, communication and endurance.

hear ye hear ye...the results of the prep Battle Royale is out. Another great escape from the clutches of divine retribution. i have done suprising well. hmm...guess i owe much of it to my classmates. well, dun think i start my 10q speech here, will save it till i recieve my award after year 3.

now is not the time to look back and bask in the glory of victory, bu the time to move on to scale greater heights.

jus then while i was having in my enrichment class(AEM), i was wondering, that the brain is so amazing storing so much information. if i had to use a computer to store all the information that is in my brain i guess 20GB also not enuff. Jus then, brain suddenly blank out. haha...given the amount of power of processing and the amount of storage, it still can crash... : )

A story with lesson.......please read on (from a friend)

This is a story that I read in the Chinese papers Lianhe Zaobao(Chinese newspaper) on 2 Aug 1999. It is written by local Chinese traveller cum writer, Wu WeiCai. I felt very touched and shaken by the story and I have translated it to English so that more people may read about it...

"This happened on a highway in China. 40 passengers, mostly males were on an inter-state bus. Halfway through the journey, two thugs on the bus suddenly went up to the lady bus driver and demanded that she stopped the bus and follow them to a waste grounds nearby. The lady driver refused and began to put up a fight against them. At the same time, she cried out to the other passengers in the bus to help her.

However, the other passengers not only cruelly turned a deaf ear to her cries, they even suggested that she give in to the thugs' demands so that they can carry on their journey quickly when they are done with her.

One young man amongst the passengers stood out to chide the rest of the passengers and tried to help the lady driver.

However, sensing that the majority of the people do not have the guts to resist them, the thugs grew even bolder and beat up the young man. They then forcefully dragged the lady driver out of the bus.

Right on the side of the road, the two thugs took turns to rape the lady driver while the rest watched. After the thugs have satisfied their lust,they commanded the lady driver to return to the bus and resume with the journey. With tears streaming down her face, the lady driver begged that they drive the righteous young man out of the bus as she is too ashamed to face him again.

The young man felt absolutely stupefied. So much for trying to speak up for the lady and now he is thrown out and left stranded on a desolated highway!

Hours later, when the lady driver passed by a mountainous cliff, she sped up and flung the whole bus with all its passengers over the cliff, right into the bottom of the valley.

This story was retold later by the only survivor of the journey - the righteous young man driven out of the bus."

Recently there have been a spate of events that reveal the ugly side of our "civilised" society. Not so long ago, a Malaysian bus driver was viciously beaten up when he tried to stop a snatch thief. He was surrounded by members of the public, watching with their arms folded.

Another baby is found in a dust bin and was nearly crushed to death by durian husks. I question myself. Have we gone from the stone age to become even more barbarious? Has the condition of the human heart degenerated to being no different from that of an animal? Did the lady bus driver commit suicide because she couldn't bear the shame of being raped or is it because she has given up on the humanity of "humans"?

If this article has caused you to pause and check the condition of your heart, you may wish to pass it onto someone else to read.

again, that friendly auntie enquires into my not so private love life.

hmmm...an introduction to that friendly auntie. she is really friendly. she is basically liken my part-time mother(fate seems to think i lack of motherly care, love and concern)

hmmm...maybe i branch off to another aspect of my life. i got quite a few mothers in my life. erm...lets do a re-count.

first there was my biological mother, who is THANKFULLY and GRATEFULLY still with me. she is the one that has ENDURED my wraith, temper, impossibilities, downs and outs. if anyone has a chance to look back at my history, i would guess i could be named mother-abuser. hmmm...i was back then on medication throughout my childhood years. my mood SWINGS...and believe it. she always got the painful end but she was still there when i fall sick DEFINITELY. few mothers can have the figure my mother has, because my period of illness are her periods of sliming. those where my primary school days.

from my birth till my primary school days, my maternal grand-mother took me in hand. i can only remember fragments of those days. she was in some way one of my part-time mothers too.

then, few years down the road, my parents consulted some astrologist and got me a god-mother. this god-mother turns out to be the wife of my mother's second brother. my relationship with her can be described as the pond that resides deep in the mountains. as calm as can be, platonic. seriously, i jus dun know what this god-son duties and rites. i guess i am as bad a god-son jus as i am a son.

then my younger brother started school. that friendly auntie was the mother of a classmate of my younger brother. that was how this part-time mother came into my life. she was always the more smiley one. unlike my mother who have 2 sons, she bore 2 daughters. haha...one might be tempted to think that our two families might end up getting more close. :p WRONG! however, we were on quite close terms though. we went on a few overseas trips togther. Genting Highlands being the more frequent place.

this auntie was always keeping track of my ongoings. to a point, i thot that there was i was a share in the share market. oh...another thing, this auntie was one of the share dabbler cum ka-ki(partner) my mother had(such activities had taken a slow-down, due to the greater ease and winning the Singapore Pools provided). recently, Auntie(a name i call her by) took interest in my love life.

hmmm...weird. she keeps on giving me confidence in myself. it seems to her that i am super qualified to have a gf and to even have a wife. :p then she would provide me on tips on girl selection, like select girls with a pure heart rather than a angelic looking face one. recent tips include certain dialect groups that she thinks are a no-no(due to the discrimatory nature of the following content, it has been censored)to be wife nor gf material.anyway, she is jus one of those friends that my mother really enjoys talkin to.

how do i know?
Answer : by the number of hours of NON-Stop conversation

Are your palms sweaty, is your heart racing and is your voice caught within your chest?
It isn't love, it's LIKE.

You can't keep your eyes or hands off of them, am i right?
It isn't love, it's LUST.

Are you proud, and eager to show them off?
It isn't love, it's LUCK.

Do you want them because you know they're there?
It isn't love, it's LONELINESS.

Are you there because it's what everyone wants?
It isn't love, it's LOYALTY.

Are you there because they kissed you, or held your hand?
It isn't love, it's LOW CONFIDENCE.

Do you stay for their confessions of love, because you don't want to hurt them?
It isn't love, it's PITY.

Do you belong to them because their sight makes your heart skip a beat?
It isn't love, it's INFATUATION.

Do you pardon their faults because you care about them?
It isn't love, it's FRIENDSHIP.

Do you tell them everyday they are the only one you think of?
It isn't love, it's a LIE.

Are you willing to give up all of your favourite things for their sake?
It isn't love, it's CHARITY.

Does your heart ache and break when they are sad?
Then it's LOVE.

Do you cry for their pain, even when they're strong?
Then it's LOVE.

Do their eyes see your true heart, and touch your soul so deeply it hurts?
Then it's LOVE.

Do you stay because a blinding incomprehensible mix of pain and relation pulls you close and holds you there?
Then it's LOVE.

Do you accept their faults because they're a part of who they are?
Then it's LOVE.

Are you attracted to others, but stay with them faithfully without regrets?
Then it's LOVE.

Would you allow them to leave you not because they want to but because they have to?
Then it's LOVE.

Would you give them your heart, your life, your death?
Then it's LOVE.

Now, if love is painful, and it tortures us so, why do we love? Why is it all we search for in life? This pain, this agony? This torture, this powerful death
of self? Why?

The answer is so simple cause it's LOVE! It is so addictive that even people who are not having it wish to experience and share it with.."

"To love is nothing. To be loved is something. To
love and be loved is everything!"

yea...the new TV is here today. the brand new 43" tv, doesnt matter wat brand, jus DANG(a word created from pure human emotion evoked sounds, purely concidental if it resembles any actual word) it.

thinkin abt new year lately. on TVmobile, the producers keep showing this short Chinese tale abt the story of Chinese New Year. describing a mythical creature named "nian"(in manadrin, meaning year) was defeated using loud noises and parades.

hmmm...as far as this libraian goes, i will take this story with much pinches of salt. hmmm, i think there is a much logical and less exaggarated explaination.

looking back at historical records, survival is the hip word. imagine high infant mortality rates, that the Chinese had to resort to creating a few god and goddess to look after their newborn. one can only imagine the diffculty to pass that first "nian"(year).

with the inconsistent weather, most of the Chinese, who were back then agricultural workers, had to suffer under the weather. Droughts, epidemics, shortage of food and floods are the usual doses of diasters. even now, at a much modern and advanced society, we dont even have the means to prevent deaths and the occurence of it.

then large percentage of the Chinese long history, showed that most chinese were livin in poverty and war. survive that. not to mention children, even adults may have problems survin each of them.

i guess for the majority of the Chinese, the new year, other than signifiying new clothes and "ang bao", it also means that, 'Congrats another death-filled year has passed'. birthdays also became another maker within a year to reward all the survivors, 'good job and keep it up'.

awake, undead and enlightened.

have been thinking hard lately. if your guess was that i was thinking for the prep Battle Royale, boy were u SO wrong.

of late, i have been sinking in and out of depression. erm...not the medically kind, jus tat i kinda feel depressed all of a sudden. you know, jus feeling emotionally unelated, unhappy and yet not sad nor sorrow. this may be the best effort to describe this feeling. for reference sake, i call it depression-beta.

then out of the blue, it jus occured to me. that the environment played quite an influential role in this absurd and obscure feeling. the cooler the environment, the easily excitable i get and thus less likely to have that depression-B. the warmer the environment, the more difficult to sink out of depression-B. hmmm...but anyway its jus conjecture for now.

quite abit has happened, my mother falling sick jus yesterday(she looks like shes all pink now). all the CNY shopping not done AT ALL(past records show that this is definitely phenonmenal). soon to be out of job(not meeting sales target to justify for my presence). enlightenment of certain issues.

it is impt to know what u wanna do every morning. hmmm...re-phrase : your first waking thot is decisive throughout that day. the consistency of that first thot can change minimaly your UNIVERSE.

go try it out. when u sit up awake, or watever position u might be in when u wake. WAT IS YOUR 1st THOT?? then if u have the diary-writing habit, u will notice that your day will very likey revlove in and around that first thot. then if u consistently have the same 1st thot for a few days. that thot might jus slowly transgress into actual event. obvious if u think abt sex and gamble every morning, that is the kind of fuel that your brain recieves. so dun blame anyone if that brain of yours relatively malfunctions.

yawns...heavy eyelids. sleep beckons...

today last day last trial of prep Battle Royale. yeah!

yesterday stayed back at school till late hrs, to be exact till Ngee Ann Library closing hrs. why? study, wat else. i guess this would be one of those really precious moments of hardworkiness. was quite shagged by the time i reached home. not to mention really HUNGRY.

when i reached home, my brother all of a sudden was SO enthu into playing 2 player game on PS2. WAHAHA...of all the time, he had to pick one of the tiring nites to play 2 player game. AND the game was Striker 1945. a 2d plane shooter. no need to guess, i was too beat to even try to avoid the oncoming fires. however, we still managed to clear all the stages twice. BAH.

oh...my laptop went thru HELL and back. yesterday Mr helpful LESLIE was goin through my laptop, and clearing all the useless processes that was in the background. i believe he was at it using the 'Startup Mechanic'. i believe the initial motive was as all good and pure. well it was for the better for the laptop resources. in the end, the whole laptop had to be restored to the restore point. anyway, thanks leslie.

kk...goin for the last trial soon...bye...

today, the last 2nd paper of the prep Battle Royale. currently, sitting in Ngee Ann Lib listening to album Qi Li Xiang by Mr Jay Chou.

the prep Battle Royale comin to an end soon. hopefully can get my JUST deserts PLUS my retributions. i must admit, i was VERY SLACK throughtout this whole prep Battle Royale phase. all i ever did was to complete my DMC. ARHARH!!! as much as i hate to fail and not do well. if there be divine forces at work, please do your job.

oops...guess i m sinking into another depression phase again. kk...erm...something more light and happy. found...erm...the more appropriate word would be re-discover. k, so i re-discover that actually, me and lesile aka kaze, are each other's lucky star cum best buddy, through astrology.

we were actually again supposed to be studying but somehow drifted to the topic of astrology, i guess that would very much be me doin the drifting. it seems that leslie needed water element in his birth characters, while havin too much fire element. SUPER concidentally, i had too much water element and needed fire element in my birth character. wow!!! this is for the lucky charm for each other part.

then we even went on to check out our chinese names. haha...while browsing through the various pages on astrology on site. we also found out that libra and leo are supposing best buddy and partners. hehe...no prize for guessing that i am libra and leslie is leo. haha...that explained quite a fair bit abt how our thinking were quite 'in phase' and we shared the smiliar taste.

u never will know that next person u know might be your best buddy. or for my referrence, the next girl that u never get to know might just be your wife. : )

today the first trial for the prep Battle Royale jus ended.

before the trial, everything was calm and smooth. everything was intact and normal like always.

then when i was inside the classroom, change happened. i started to flush. excitement drew my energy away from my body. i knew i had to calm myself down. throughout the paper, i had to balance between the excitement and to calm myself down.

i was excited to complete the paper and excited to write my answers down as fast as possible. in my mind, i only knew TIME was not on my side. then of all the moments, nature had to start knocking. my bladder was not holding out, my hands were shivering and my excitement was beyond repression.

alas, everything came to a quick equilibrium pretty soon, near the end of the paper. my hands no longer shiver as much. my bladder seems to be numb from the holding back. the paper seems to be completed soon. haha...guess wat, there was still ample time left...phew.

i would consider this quite a blessing actually. i found out that not everyone had completed the paper in time. my condolences to those who did not complete the trials in time. however, dun lose hope. this is jus the first of trials, the best is yet to be...not everyone can be off in a good start, but a beautiful finish is more important.

tml prep Battle Royale will continue with its second trial and BEST of Luck.