We got plenty of happy, content baby photos, but this is still my favorite:
Hope your Christmas was merry and bright!
Sunday, December 26, 2010
Sunday, November 21, 2010
A boob is a short leash.
I am breastfeeding my daughter. She took to nursing like a pro, latching on the delivery room just minutes after she was born. It is a wonderful bonding experience, and I enjoy it, despite the difficulties we've encountered along the way.
Little bear has a sensitivity to both dairy and soy proteins, so I've had to eliminate all sources of dairy and soy from my diet - which unfortunately rules out most prepackaged goods (flip over and read the package of almost anything, and you'll find that dairy and soy are common additives to most foods). I'm trying to view this as an adventure to combat the feelings of deprivation. I prepare a lot more things from scratch now, and am very familiar with my local whole foods, the Good Food Store. But I miss cheese. And butter. And bagels with cream cheese. Omg, cream cheeeeeseee... Okay, enough dreaming about foods. Overall, I'm doing pretty well with the diet thing. It won't be forever. And when it's over I will eat my body weight in cheddar cheese and butter.
My little bear is a HUNGRY bear. Breastfed babies naturally eat more frequently than formula fed ones (breastmilk is easier for their little tummies to digest, so it moves through more quickly and they feel hungry sooner than their formula fed friends), but this kiddo is a serial nurser. At three and a half months, she still nurses every two hours, all day, like clockwork. She does sleep a decent four or five hour stretch at night, so I do get a little break then. I'm hoping she'll turn a corner any time now, but if she doesn't soon then she's going to get to start rice cereal a little earlier than originally planned!
I have a nice breast pump so that we have milk available if I'm not there to nurse her. In the first couple of months we gave her a few bottles of breastmilk, just to make sure that she could figure out how to drink from a bottle. She did it with no problems, so I didn't think much of it. However, we haven't had any need to give her a bottle for probably the last month, and since we planned to leave her with a babysitter one day this week, we thought we should test out her bottle skills. EPIC FAIL. She seemed absolutely affronted that we would even suggest she drink milk from anything besides mom. She screamed and screamed, and left my poor husband a little shell shocked from the experience. I have to admit, after this development I had a small-ish breakdown. I have been apart from her from maybe three feedings ever, so I was really looking forward to leaving her with a sitter and going out with Luis. Everything I do at present must fit into the hour and a half I have after she nurses and before she wants to nurse again. For errands and such it's no biggie, we just park the car and nurse wherever - but I would really love to go join the grownup world for an evening every so often. We're in the process of trying different bottles and nipples, and other tricks for getting a breastfed babe to drink a bottle (change of scenery, change of schedule, etc). I'm hoping one of these works, but if not then I'm not sure what comes next.
I know I'm complaining a lot here, but honestly I'm still happy that I chose to breastfeed and have been able to stick with it. I love the quiet times in the middle of the night, snuggled up in our rocking chair nursing. It's so beautiful, so natural. I am in awe of my body and how it just knows what to do. (Seriously. I freaking make milk. Craziness? I think so.) A year from now the difficulties will be a distant memory, and I'll probably yearn for those special nighttime moments with my little girl - but the benefits she gets from nursing will last her a whole lifetime, and I can't think of a better gift to give my daughter.
Little bear has a sensitivity to both dairy and soy proteins, so I've had to eliminate all sources of dairy and soy from my diet - which unfortunately rules out most prepackaged goods (flip over and read the package of almost anything, and you'll find that dairy and soy are common additives to most foods). I'm trying to view this as an adventure to combat the feelings of deprivation. I prepare a lot more things from scratch now, and am very familiar with my local whole foods, the Good Food Store. But I miss cheese. And butter. And bagels with cream cheese. Omg, cream cheeeeeseee... Okay, enough dreaming about foods. Overall, I'm doing pretty well with the diet thing. It won't be forever. And when it's over I will eat my body weight in cheddar cheese and butter.
My little bear is a HUNGRY bear. Breastfed babies naturally eat more frequently than formula fed ones (breastmilk is easier for their little tummies to digest, so it moves through more quickly and they feel hungry sooner than their formula fed friends), but this kiddo is a serial nurser. At three and a half months, she still nurses every two hours, all day, like clockwork. She does sleep a decent four or five hour stretch at night, so I do get a little break then. I'm hoping she'll turn a corner any time now, but if she doesn't soon then she's going to get to start rice cereal a little earlier than originally planned!
I have a nice breast pump so that we have milk available if I'm not there to nurse her. In the first couple of months we gave her a few bottles of breastmilk, just to make sure that she could figure out how to drink from a bottle. She did it with no problems, so I didn't think much of it. However, we haven't had any need to give her a bottle for probably the last month, and since we planned to leave her with a babysitter one day this week, we thought we should test out her bottle skills. EPIC FAIL. She seemed absolutely affronted that we would even suggest she drink milk from anything besides mom. She screamed and screamed, and left my poor husband a little shell shocked from the experience. I have to admit, after this development I had a small-ish breakdown. I have been apart from her from maybe three feedings ever, so I was really looking forward to leaving her with a sitter and going out with Luis. Everything I do at present must fit into the hour and a half I have after she nurses and before she wants to nurse again. For errands and such it's no biggie, we just park the car and nurse wherever - but I would really love to go join the grownup world for an evening every so often. We're in the process of trying different bottles and nipples, and other tricks for getting a breastfed babe to drink a bottle (change of scenery, change of schedule, etc). I'm hoping one of these works, but if not then I'm not sure what comes next.
I know I'm complaining a lot here, but honestly I'm still happy that I chose to breastfeed and have been able to stick with it. I love the quiet times in the middle of the night, snuggled up in our rocking chair nursing. It's so beautiful, so natural. I am in awe of my body and how it just knows what to do. (Seriously. I freaking make milk. Craziness? I think so.) A year from now the difficulties will be a distant memory, and I'll probably yearn for those special nighttime moments with my little girl - but the benefits she gets from nursing will last her a whole lifetime, and I can't think of a better gift to give my daughter.
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
A valuable lesson.
Why is it that we forget to be kind to those closest to us?
I try to be polite and courteous. I'm sure there are plenty of times when I fail and don't even know it, but when I do notice I try to remember so I don't make the same mistake twice. But for some reason, it seems so much easier to make these mistakes with family than with anyone else.
While I was back in my hometown, I went to visit my dad and his wife. She gave me some clothes that she had purchased as gifts for my little bear when she was born. Unfortunately, they were the size that she has since outgrown. Instead of graciously accepting her gift, I commented that she had outgrown that size, and I think I may even have mentioned them keeping the clothes to give to another family. Why? Why did I ever say something like that? It was rude and ungrateful.
I came home that evening with a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. Someone had done something kind for me, and I completely poopooed it. This is something I feel strongly about - I believe that it is important to politely accept a gift with a heartfelt thanks. It really is the thought that counts. Maybe the person picks out something that I wouldn't have, or gets a size wrong, but they cared enough about me to make a point of giving me a gift, and for that I should always be grateful. (And in this case the clothes are adorable, and as it turns out they actually all fit her.)
I think that it's easy in life to become so comfortable in relationships that we forget to be polite. Please and thank yous become omitted from married life. Gracious acceptance of gifts are forgotten among family members. We take love and kindness for granted. I think this is a mistake. If we realize it's important to be cordial toward acquaintances, wouldn't that go double for those we are close to?
I got an important reminder of this the other day. Another life lesson revisited - the hard way.
I try to be polite and courteous. I'm sure there are plenty of times when I fail and don't even know it, but when I do notice I try to remember so I don't make the same mistake twice. But for some reason, it seems so much easier to make these mistakes with family than with anyone else.
While I was back in my hometown, I went to visit my dad and his wife. She gave me some clothes that she had purchased as gifts for my little bear when she was born. Unfortunately, they were the size that she has since outgrown. Instead of graciously accepting her gift, I commented that she had outgrown that size, and I think I may even have mentioned them keeping the clothes to give to another family. Why? Why did I ever say something like that? It was rude and ungrateful.
I came home that evening with a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. Someone had done something kind for me, and I completely poopooed it. This is something I feel strongly about - I believe that it is important to politely accept a gift with a heartfelt thanks. It really is the thought that counts. Maybe the person picks out something that I wouldn't have, or gets a size wrong, but they cared enough about me to make a point of giving me a gift, and for that I should always be grateful. (And in this case the clothes are adorable, and as it turns out they actually all fit her.)
I think that it's easy in life to become so comfortable in relationships that we forget to be polite. Please and thank yous become omitted from married life. Gracious acceptance of gifts are forgotten among family members. We take love and kindness for granted. I think this is a mistake. If we realize it's important to be cordial toward acquaintances, wouldn't that go double for those we are close to?
I got an important reminder of this the other day. Another life lesson revisited - the hard way.
Wednesday, November 03, 2010
Politics as usual.
Geez, it's like no one went to kindergarten. Be nice. No name calling. Share.
On the most basic level, we are all more alike than we are different. We want to lead happy, peaceful lives. We want to be in good health, and we want our children to grow up safe and strong.
All this shouting at the rain and blaming people - it's ridiculous. Stop being a part of the problem and start being a part of the solution.
I said it two years ago and I say it again now - we need to put partisanship aside and work toward the interests of all of us as people.
Please?
On the most basic level, we are all more alike than we are different. We want to lead happy, peaceful lives. We want to be in good health, and we want our children to grow up safe and strong.
All this shouting at the rain and blaming people - it's ridiculous. Stop being a part of the problem and start being a part of the solution.
I said it two years ago and I say it again now - we need to put partisanship aside and work toward the interests of all of us as people.
Please?
Monday, October 25, 2010
Falling in like.
The moment I gave birth to my daughter, I loved her. She was my flesh, this tiny helpless thing, the realization of my husband's and my dreams and hopes during nine long months of pregnancy. She was the beginning of a new family. But in the two and a half months since she's been with us, I've grown not just to love her, but to like her as well. About a month ago the sleepy newborn began to give way to a bright eyed, happy baby girl. Her personality is starting to shine through.
My little bear is a morning person - she wakes up and stretches and yawns and stretches and yawns and STRE-E-ETCHES and YAWNS - this goes on for about ten minutes. Then she's all smiles, ready to chat and enjoy the day. (My mom tells me I was the same way as a baby. And although my waking is often more grudging as an adult, once I'm up I love the morning, and am usually a pretty cheerful morning person.) She and I lay on my bed in the morning, enjoying a bit of quiet chat in the cozy early morning hours before the day gets rolling.
I think our girl is going to be a mover and a shaker. She likes to be up, seeing what the world is all about. She will sometimes cry the second you sit down while holding her. Stand back up, she stops. She also never cared for my pouch sling, since it has her in the cradle position. Can't see what's going on! She likes to be more upright and checking things out. She's wicked strong - even the nurse in the delivery room said "Wow, she's so strong!" as she was doing her newborn assessment. I think maybe we have another little triathlete in the making.
Every day she shows up a little more, ready to have a go at this great big world. It's fun discovering who she is. I can't wait to continue meeting her.
My little bear is a morning person - she wakes up and stretches and yawns and stretches and yawns and STRE-E-ETCHES and YAWNS - this goes on for about ten minutes. Then she's all smiles, ready to chat and enjoy the day. (My mom tells me I was the same way as a baby. And although my waking is often more grudging as an adult, once I'm up I love the morning, and am usually a pretty cheerful morning person.) She and I lay on my bed in the morning, enjoying a bit of quiet chat in the cozy early morning hours before the day gets rolling.
I think our girl is going to be a mover and a shaker. She likes to be up, seeing what the world is all about. She will sometimes cry the second you sit down while holding her. Stand back up, she stops. She also never cared for my pouch sling, since it has her in the cradle position. Can't see what's going on! She likes to be more upright and checking things out. She's wicked strong - even the nurse in the delivery room said "Wow, she's so strong!" as she was doing her newborn assessment. I think maybe we have another little triathlete in the making.
Every day she shows up a little more, ready to have a go at this great big world. It's fun discovering who she is. I can't wait to continue meeting her.
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
When Facebook is your only friend.
At present, I am a stay at home mom. This won't likely be the case forever, but for now I am so very lucky that I am able to be at home with my baby bear. That being said...
Ohmygod, it's lonely being at home with a newborn. What I miss the most are the interactions of daily life, like chatting with coworkers and patients or having lunch with friends. My girl is a great snuggler, but the conversations leave something to be desired.
I love the cuddles and the play time, and even watching her sleep, but the pace is unlike anything I have ever experienced. As a formerly busy person, this is an unnerving situation for me. I sit on the couch with a beautiful baby asleep in my arms, and I look around me - stacks of mail to go through, dishes to do, projects lying untouched. I feel busy all the time, but I don't seem to do much - change seven or eight diapers, nurse every other hour or so, supervise a little tummy time, take a shower if I'm lucky. These days accomplishing even the smallest household chore feels like a huge feat.
What keeps me sane (and loving my life) is remembering that this time with just the two of us is so limited, so precious. In a few short years I'll be wishing I could get her to hold still and just sit on my lap and snuggle. A few more years down the road she'll be at school, and me at work, and our time together will be even less. Fast forward a few more, and she'll be asking me to drop her off at the mall. These thoughts are what keep me from feeling too lonely, and what keep me happily planted on the couch day after day, snuggling my sweet baby girl.
Ohmygod, it's lonely being at home with a newborn. What I miss the most are the interactions of daily life, like chatting with coworkers and patients or having lunch with friends. My girl is a great snuggler, but the conversations leave something to be desired.
I make a point of getting out of the house most days, even if just for a quick trip to the store. And some weeks I'm lucky enough to meet a friend for lunch or have a visit with one of the other stay at home moms I know. But honestly, most days the only interaction I have with friends and acquaintances is online. In the evenings when Luis and I are discussing our days, I find that often my contributions to the conversation begin with "So-and-so's status said..."
I love the cuddles and the play time, and even watching her sleep, but the pace is unlike anything I have ever experienced. As a formerly busy person, this is an unnerving situation for me. I sit on the couch with a beautiful baby asleep in my arms, and I look around me - stacks of mail to go through, dishes to do, projects lying untouched. I feel busy all the time, but I don't seem to do much - change seven or eight diapers, nurse every other hour or so, supervise a little tummy time, take a shower if I'm lucky. These days accomplishing even the smallest household chore feels like a huge feat.
What keeps me sane (and loving my life) is remembering that this time with just the two of us is so limited, so precious. In a few short years I'll be wishing I could get her to hold still and just sit on my lap and snuggle. A few more years down the road she'll be at school, and me at work, and our time together will be even less. Fast forward a few more, and she'll be asking me to drop her off at the mall. These thoughts are what keep me from feeling too lonely, and what keep me happily planted on the couch day after day, snuggling my sweet baby girl.
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Since last we met...
Fourteen months.
I haven't written a proper blog post in fourteen months. During that time I've thought about it, played around with topics in my head, even logged into Blogger a few times - but somehow I just never got farther than that.
But, enough with the excuses. This may be a one-night show, a fluke, a blip - but tonight I feel like writing.
On to the big news - I had a baby! We decided last fall that we were ready for a family, and presto! Mother nature wasted no time obliging us our wish. After nine months of bellyaching (no pun intended) about the woes of pregnancy (I was not the gracious, adorable kind of pregnant woman. I was the chubby, awkward, sweating one.), I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl.
"Life changing" is how everyone describes becoming a parent, but I think that barely scratches the surface. Ups, downs, way ups, waaay downs... the first month home with our little one was a hormone-powered roller coaster unlike anything I have ever experienced. I expect that parts of my journey will become blog fodder in the days and months to come. As for my baby bear, I adore her, I and am glad to have such a sweet, lively little soul to teach me how to be a mom.
I haven't written a proper blog post in fourteen months. During that time I've thought about it, played around with topics in my head, even logged into Blogger a few times - but somehow I just never got farther than that.
But, enough with the excuses. This may be a one-night show, a fluke, a blip - but tonight I feel like writing.
On to the big news - I had a baby! We decided last fall that we were ready for a family, and presto! Mother nature wasted no time obliging us our wish. After nine months of bellyaching (no pun intended) about the woes of pregnancy (I was not the gracious, adorable kind of pregnant woman. I was the chubby, awkward, sweating one.), I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl.
"Life changing" is how everyone describes becoming a parent, but I think that barely scratches the surface. Ups, downs, way ups, waaay downs... the first month home with our little one was a hormone-powered roller coaster unlike anything I have ever experienced. I expect that parts of my journey will become blog fodder in the days and months to come. As for my baby bear, I adore her, I and am glad to have such a sweet, lively little soul to teach me how to be a mom.
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