Love never gives up. Love cares more for others than self. Love doesn't want what it doesn't have. Love doesn't strut, doesn't have a swelled head, doesn't force itself on others, isn't always "me first."
- 1 Corinthians 13:4-5, THE MESSAGE
pingy
dear God I must confess
that sometimes You seem far away
sometimes i forget about
how i stand because of grace
but Lord there's been a change in me
a change i hope will stay
for this is my prayer today
i just remembered someone told me this story of a man eating his meal. he would always save the best for the last. so for example if he liked the mushrooms, he would leave it all to the end to savour it. so as he finished the rest of his food, and was about to start on his favourite..
there was an earthquake.
how sad. i guess many a time we would save a part of us in preparation for 'in-case' situations. so we end up holding back. not being able to reach our potentials.
kinda like how my coach back in sec school days would always say. when people are running for their lives, they can run sooo much faster than what they think their best was. and we'll have the strength to carry a whole cupboard to save someone in a fire or something if we have to. and he always relate it back to basketball. i'm sure we can relate it to anywhere else.
there is still so much to be discovered of the human species. even all the true files on tv scares me. there are just infinite possibilities.
Let the weak say, "I am strong" Let the poor say, "I am rich" Because of what the Lord has done for us.
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
zombie mama | 8:05 PM
pingy is so dead! she wasted another day. plus she fell asleep. oh my goodness. she has to finish jellyfish tonight. must! and have to attend lecture tmr. have to! losing sleeeeep again. dang!
ugly singaporeans | 4:39 PM
was watchin youtube. and somehow end up linking to the many videos posted by singaporeans. most of them are pretty embarrassing. because things can get really ugly. and the whole world is watching us on the web.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ncIssZlYfzA sidenote: you don't really want to watch till the end. its just the same thing being dragged thru the whole duration.
even if the 2 people were at fault in the first place... pushing them to such extreme is just scary. put me in their shoes, i would cry. esp if i'm being accused. no way i can fight back at all.
don't know if its part of our nature to make big scenes outta human nature situations or amplify moments of folly.
fighting, arguing, scolding bad words, digging at other people's mistakes, ganging up, racism, seeing themselves as more 'high class', and posting videos of 'low class' ppl, despising them, as tho they are things one would never do.. like eating in a bus? ah? seriously? digging nose? (this is funny tho. haha) aunties arguing and scolding people? yes, they look bad. but i would look as horrible if i was provoked to that extent. wouldn't i? hmmm.. i mean, we are all humans. i just don't get it.
i know these happen all round the world. but i just don't understand why its so amplified in singapore. its no wonder why we even have a term being 'ugly singaporeans'. yikes. its pretty much part of everyday life... maybe because people are really stressed up. and being in that state, it is easier to be irritable and thus flare up or pick on people easily. think so? yeah. probably so.
well. we are all still in the making. being moulded day by day..
| 7:25 AM
urghhhh.... suicideeeee. i'm sooo tired and i still haven't finish my work. even my pimples are popping in protest. i neeeeed sleeeep. i'm crankkyyy.
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
chibabom! | 7:12 PM
i'm driving myself crazyyyyyyyy. ahhhhhhhhhhh....
who am i | 2:14 PM
Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth Would care to know my name Would care to feel my hurt Who am I, that the Bright and Morning Star Would choose to light the way For my ever wandering heart
Who am I, that the eyes that see my sin Would look on me with love and watch me rise again Who am I, that the voice that calmed the sea Would call out through the rain And calm the storm in me
Not because of who I am But because of what You've done Not because of what I've done But because of who You are
I am a flower quickly fading Here today and gone tomorrow A wave tossed in the ocean Vapor in the wind Still You hear me when I'm calling Lord, You catch me when I'm falling And You've told me who I am I am Yours, I am Yours
| 2:54 AM
oh my mama AUD dropped to 0.925 as compared to sing$.
=O
Monday, October 27, 2008
daylight saving | 11:50 PM
time seem to pass wayyy faster ever since my clocks are tuned forward by an hour. its like an hour lost in translation! freeeakkk out...
and the clock in the kitchen is like the ultimate illusion that time is still ticking slowly. (because i have not tuned it yet [too high for me. lol])
also, i think i'm losing the ability to understand the jokes girls crack. wonder if that's e consequence of being in a male dominated faculty. -shrugs.
i feel like i can start on a whole whining spree again. and i just did with allie. never felt better, having someone to understand and share the same sentiments. so i shan't do it here again.
the joy and the pain i'm making them yours
i haven't sang so much before these few days. all the promises suddenly seem so close and real. i have tasted what is good. and its really time i step my foot down to stop myself from anything that will replace that.
worship and praise is one of the best weapon we have. the fallen angel would know this better than us.
all that i am is yours all that i have is yours i give you my heart and soul Lord, i'm yours
there is so much more i wish i could do. but i'm sure He would do a wayy better job. so take heart! you're not alone.
lead me to your heart | 3:09 AM
Everything I once held dear I count it all as lost
Sunday, October 26, 2008
tired randomness | 4:36 AM
i like cutting my nails really short. i cannot stand long nails because they feel kinda dangerous and it being there just irks me. cutting my nails makes me happy.
2 more weeks to exams. that IS scary. but i'm trying to take it a day at a time. if not it'll just overwhelm me like it did before. not good.
i now know the seriousness of feeding your soul with the right stuff. learnt my lesson to not allow myself dwell in songs that feeds my negative emotions. it just goes nowhere and i was just wasting my time. thinking about it, it has been quite sometime since i've listened to anything else. good progress.
also, i realised being a leader will put me in situations where i'm forced to progress. because, as a leader, i'm suddenly given the responsibility of the lives of a few people and i will be held accountable to the things i say and do. so if i don't do something bout the weeds in my life, it is gonna affect more than just me myself.
-inspired by sz's post this is something more than a man's sheer perseverance.
a post that has basically very random thoughts becos i'm reeeeally tired. haven slept much for the past 3 days...
Thursday, October 23, 2008
the ants go marching | 6:43 PM
i am and will be drowning in pools of assignment right till the last day of school + 3. which means there are assignments that will eat into my supposingly study break.
few more weeks. few more weeks.
means i have to be really good at threading water.
yelps.
ok. i really should stop whining. i haven't stopped since the exams timetable was out. even i can't stand myself. yikes!
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
peppa pig | 4:06 PM
check this out. http://www.peppapig.com
take a look at his family. *snorts
amazing what children are learning.
i just saw an episode when mama pig gave papa pig's chair away to the school for fund raising. then papa pig bought the chair at a high price because it's supposed to be antique, thinking that he could match it with his own one. in the end he found out and they all laughed about it (ROFL), with all of them drawn in standing position but horizontally. a very funny sight.
if we were in papa pig's shoes, our usual reaction would be to get mad at 1) mama pig for giving his stuff away 2) paying so much money for something that was his in the first place right?
but the cartoon showed nothing of that sort.
pretty cool i thought.
i should start looking more on the bright side and have a little more faith. time to do work.
Monday, October 20, 2008
| 1:04 AM
i just need a familiar voice. to tell me that things are gonna be alright. i can't hold on much longer. i'm breaking from the inside. God i really need you.
Friday, October 17, 2008
almighty | 3:00 AM
i am here to announce the horrid week ahead of me again. i can't believe i have such crazy amounts of deadlines to meet. engineers are sure super people with extraordinary powers. haha. i am amazed. just gotta cry/sulk/whine and then continue with life cos time wait for no man huh.
another 2.6333333 more years to finish my degree. at least i'm inching forward. is there another word for inching? maybe centimeter-ing or millimeter-ing forward or something? hahahaha. i sure can joke.. i think i'm starting to talk to myself. the result of engineering. woohoo..haha.
anyway, here goes.
sat - grp meeting (no time limit) mon - jellyfish due tues - civil assignment due thurs - civil grp proj due fri - mate report and matlab due
sometimes i really don't know if i should laugh or cry at my situation. but i guess i'm laughin about it now.
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
| 12:33 AM
this emotional whirlpool is crushing me along with the looming exams and deadlines. and the enemy is attacking like there's no tomorrow. i aint strong enough for this, but my Lord is. please keep me sane. and keep him safe. i still cant talk to you nor comfort you because i'm afraid i will say something bad/i'll snap, even if i didn't start out with that intention. and i don't want things to become even worse than it is. i hope u understand..
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
my date with the Lord | 9:38 PM
its been such a long time since i went jogging by the bay. just been such a busy stressed out kid. rahhhh..
and i'm glad i did today. its was awesome. the weather was just right. and with every step i took, the lighter i felt.
every little spot i remembered. He was there. He brought me through.
i saw the moon rising(it was huge and round today), the purple and blue sky, the birds, the waters, the grass, the dogs, the people. felt the wind, the peace.
and the music? just great. praise and worship never felt better.
He was all around.
i have been robbed away by all the things of the earth. so long now. so long. time to come back.
side tracking - a fly flew into my nose. AGAIN. lucky i blew my nose quick enough instead of breathing in. if not i wld have a fly trapped in my lungs. ewww..
Anno Domini[1] (Medieval Latin: In the year of (the/Our) Lord),[2][3] abbreviated as AD or A.D., is a designation used to number years in the Julian and Gregorian calendars. More fully, years may be also specified as Anno Domini Nostri Iesu (Jesu) Christi ("In the Year of Our Lord Jesus Christ").
-wiki
the very calender we hold dear to us now, the one that defines our day and night, weeks, months and years goes back to the very day of the Lord.
He exists.
History may always be argued as inaccurate accounts by people of failing memories, or simply believable stories people have cooked up to pen down in books...
But He is real.
not only because history says so.
He is real because i feel Him each and every day. He loves me so much, He died for all the bad things i've done and will do.. He keeps me going in this crazy world of ours.
Saturday, October 11, 2008
what are we without Him? | 11:08 PM
week after week after week. His grace overflows. His love refreshes. His touch heals.
shear power | 4:14 AM
i don't want to think about anything right now.
not now. not now.
| 1:47 AM
can't do this.
Thursday, October 9, 2008
勁歌金曲 2 - 情歌王 | 3:20 AM
was at utopia supporting wilson when i came across this medley on the screen. wow. so many songs altogether. i think its really cool.
and. good job wilson. its okay that u din win, i think its great courage just to be up there. =)
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
sing hallelujah | 11:47 PM
the exam timetable is out. Monday 10 November 2008 MECH1401-Engineering Dynamics
Tuesday 11 November 2008 MATE1412-Material Engineering 1
Wednesday 12 November 2008 GENG2140-Modelling and Computer Analysis for Engineers
Monday 17 November 2008 CIVL1110-Engineering Structures
notice how the numbers in bold for the first 3 papers are in perfect sequence? hmmmm.. and how all the titles sound so hard? dounble hmmmm..
i just had my round of 4 assignments due from monday to thursday. now the news of this... omg. i don't end school till the last day of october. which means i have 8-9 days to cramp all these together.=O i'm whinny yet speechless at the same time.
Yet will i praise thee. yet will i praise thee. its all i can think of now.
lots of prayers needed. lots and lots of them. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
Monday, October 6, 2008
Hold me Jesus | 3:55 AM
Sometimes my life just don't make sense at all When the mountain look so big and my faith just seems so small
When I wake up in the night I fear the dark It's so hot inside my soul There must be blisters on my heart
Surrender don't come natural to me I'd rather fight you for something I don't really want, than to take what you give that I need
Take me Jesus, take me now.
i'm gonna build something one day | 1:20 AM
i can't wait for the holidays to come.
they better come quick, before my brains are overworked into a pulp.
everyday i have something to hand in. don't need to sleep d. T_T
tell me again. why am i in engineering? esp when my fav pastime is sleeping? i'll get through. i'll get through.
Thursday, October 2, 2008
wad a twist | 11:00 PM
so jumbled up inside out upside down. horrible mess horrible mess. indeed i've been surviving on my own strength and i think i'm breaking apart.
- - - * interrupted by housemate.
thank God for housemates. she just came back from Perth Royal Show and i got a showbag! and cotton candy. =))) i definitely need people around me. closing myself up in the room thinking of all the scary things could do A LOT of harm.
thank God for people. thank God.
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
my secret hiding place | 9:42 PM
if only everything could be as easy as just shitting it all out. out of your system.
sorry for the crude language. i think i'm tat bit cranky right now. ah.. women. what a chore it is being one.
i need a little tree house. somewhere i can run to. away from expectations. away from big scary monsters hiding behind the closet.
