Love never gives up. Love cares more for others than self. Love doesn't want what it doesn't have. Love doesn't strut, doesn't have a swelled head, doesn't force itself on others, isn't always "me first."

- 1 Corinthians 13:4-5, THE MESSAGE

pingy

dear God I must confess
that sometimes You seem far away
sometimes i forget about
how i stand because of grace

but Lord there's been a change in me
a change i hope will stay
for this is my prayer today

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i'm bringing my snacking habits back to singapore.

CRAPS!

dinner. sour tape. taokaenoi. famous amos.

i just can't stop.

one after another.

so dead. so dead.

suddenly i'm going to china..

it wld be good experience.
but crap, i might have just screwed some things.
i'm gonna earn plenty of money and give my parents a good life.
i can't stop feeling guilty spending all that money.
sigh.
all to give me a better life.

thank you.

everyday i'm thinking.
but not making any constructive decisions out of it.
how long do i have to live with this.

sigh.

i type so much faster with my pi-li-pa-lak keyboard.
i love the sound of it.
i like to feel it sink in and making so much noise.

notebooks just doesn't give me that feel.
but i still love my mac very much.
just need an ipod to go with it. ahahah.
but i wun get it till i earn my own money.

i have spent too much of my parent's money already.
i'm gonna work for what i want.
i want to get a student exchange.
i think it'll be lotsa fun.
some form of running away maybe.
i'm such a coward.

i didn't know how to react.
was afraid. afraid of everything. i can't explain. or rather. its hard to put it in words. and i refuse to try.
it felt so right. yet at e same time it felt so wrong.
i don't want to give in.
for i cant promise anything.
i'm afraid if i soften up.
it'll lead to more heartbreaks when i leave once again.
i don't have the courage.
the courage to persevere.
please don't be so nice... i can't live up to it.

craps craps craps.

i thought i was only slightly fatter.
i was wrong!!

the used to be loosest pants that i could pull right off without unbuttoning became TIGHT.
like... oh man. i really cant take this blow... lol.

all i can say is craps. CRAPS! ahhhhhhhhhh

so. i was asked by counter 10 to go to counter 14 to do some paperwork.
counter 14 stared blankly at me, and i stared blankly at her.
14 called 10.

the paperwork was for traveling under 18years old unaccompanied.
and yea the guys had a good time laughing.

so evil.

2 musicals and a little bit of transformers and i'm back in singapore.
swift.


yes i know i look/became/am fatter.
one of the first few sentence people say.
6 people and counting.

it actually feels kinda weird to be home. like i was picked up by the crane looking machine with pincers and dropped into another place. i can't believe one sem came and gone like that. its like a big dream.

time to be transformed inside out!

sing to me of the song of the stars.

I'm not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I didn't do

i realised. the more u want something..
more often than not, it backfires.

i can never figure out what will become of me without Him.

i have about 25 bites on my right leg, 30 or so on my left leg?

darn the mozzies. set the record.

the previous one was only 19 altogether.

nice.

i have plenty of blisters from tree climbing and money bar-ing too. but thats all cool. i don't mind it cos i enjoy climbing. and man must i train to do at least 1 pull up. ahahaha.

i was looking at the units and topics i have to take next year.
all i can see is that my brain will be very saturated.
no projects, plenty of theories.

Lord, please give me the strength.
i aint gonna waste my parents money.

all i can say is that i am so blessed to be here. so blessed, its close to being a miracle.
i have so much to be thankful for. i doubt i can remember all.



firstly, the friends i met here are just great. just one semester and i feel like i've known them forever. its just so good. so heartwarming. to know how as a christian, u go around to any part of the world, meet people from around the world, and u still feel like u're in one big family with God as our Daddy.

i was telling another friend that when u have great company, it doesn't matter if u're in the shittyest place ever. it just overrides everything. and nooo.. i am not saying Perth is shitty. its just an analogy since ppl have an impression that is is really boring.



secondly, i've kinda learnt how to live independently. with lots of help from my lovely housemate eunice of cos. its cool we get along well. i hope this is not one sided! =X

i am half ready to be a good housewife. lol. from maybe 10% to 50%. that is not bad. hahaha. at the end of 4 years.. i'll be ready. yeah i'll be ready. haha.



thirdly, i can proudly say now that i know how to fish!
give me a few more trips and i'll try doing everything from setting up the rod to getting the hook out of the fish's mouth, even tho i'm bloody scared of jumping slimey creatures. i'll do it nx time! i must try.



fourthly, i climbed a tree today! well. with the help of friends pushing my ass of cos. lol. cos the tree just had no grip man. but people with long legs can literally just walk up the tree. annoying. max hor?

coming from e singapore city, u seldom get to do things like that. i had so much fun. just like a kid. and while i was up there, hugging the huge tree branch under the stars, feeling the night breeze, i closed my eyes.. and i felt like i had a dream come true; i gave God a big big hug.



one bad thing was that i played to much and kinda neglected my studies a little. had so many rounds of panic attacks during the exam period. i am so glad its all over. i am just waiting for my distinctions. hahahaha.



And i'll be going up north to coral bay next week. snorkling and all. tell me i'm blessed. cos i know i sure am.



3 and a half more years to go. let me grow closer to You. i want to go back to singapore, shining with Your light. leading the lost to You.

Thank You. God i love u so so much. for showering that much love to me. even when i do not deserve it.

and God i pray, u bless my friends with your love too.

i really wish i could give God a big hug.
He would cover me with His big big hands.
and then i would feel much much better.

The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure.
Who can understand it?
– Jeremiah 17:9

i'm addicted to the fray.

the songs are pretty similar.
all so addictive.

i thought she was pretty.

but she looked so different the other day.
it was the make up all along.

maybe i could be as pretty.
but why try.

God made me beautiful as i am.

i choked on my saliva while eating a sweet.

wazzup with me nowadays. seriously.

and so.. i sparked a mosquito.

then i switched off the badminton looking racket thing.

thinking that it's safe, i touched the netting.

"SPARK!" i sparked my finger.

my eye hurts.

accidentally poked soap into one of them.

well done weiping. well done. watch dvd while bathing.

its not easy. to be. me.

for He has greater plans for you.
plans to prosper and not harm you.

He loves u more than anything else in this world.
you are not alone.

but i'm also a hopeless sad love story romantic.