Welcome welcome ladies and gentlemen.
Esteemed guests and captive audience for the next, oh wait, they're gone now. well, it was nice having your atten...there it goes again.
You ever find it hard to concentrate when someone is saying something, especially when they're just like mumbling to themselves.
It's hard man. It's like the guys going, "what would you do if you had a time machine? because here's what i would do..."
then you're thinking to yourself, "man, my balls are really starting to itch. oh wait, he's saying something, nope, no wait, he's just talking to himself again."
I talk to myself. yeah, its perfectly normal.
No, not that kinda talk to myself, where I say everything's going to be fine. I'm not that times emotional.
I'm more of having a conversation with yourself. where you say something, and the other guy says something else completely random and you're like, alright, wtf, lets go with it.
sometimes these conversations are so profound, its like you're talking a spiritual guide or something and other times, you take a second and think to yourself, what the hell did he just say, why am i even friends with this guy, oh yeah wait...
you know whats crazy though, i mean, besides the fact that a guy can have a nonsensical conversation with himself out of sheer boredom.
whats crazy is that people in mental institutions, probably don't really need to be there.
i mean, if you think about it, all it is are these bunch of people having a different view on life.
if we did that to all people who had a different view on life, we'd all be locked up in there, you know.
its like, some of these guys...and girls, lets not discriminate. i mean, i can be rude, but i sure dont discriminate.
all they have is a different view on life. like, this lady can imagine having a new kid every day. i mean, sure childbirth is hell and popping one out once a day is literally amazing, but hey, its her point of view and by golly george, if she wants one, there are a strangely overwhelming number of people who want to give one to her.
heck, if you found a number of people who shared her point of view, you could solve 2 of the worlds problems.
yeah but suffice to say the reason we're all sitting down here isn't necessarily for the humour.
its for the seriousness and the thought provoking madness that doth occur in thine minds.
such as, how we're all adjectives.
i'm fat, short, and ugly. i'm also a great liar.
see? its all to do with absolutes, that we're one thing so we can't be the other.
i mean, i can be fat, not saying i'm not. but i'm not as fat as...a whale. thats an expression by the way, look it up, its called literature you uneducated bastard.
short? next to a midget i could be yao ming.
ugly? well, yeah on bad hair days, nah i'm just messing with you, i have no hair. hence, i have no bad hair days and i'm just ugly all the time.
and also, if you think about it, people who are constantly happy most of their lives are probably psychos.
i mean, we're all entitled to bad days. sadness, depression. it'd be amazing if you got hit by a truck and you'd still be smiling. you'd be put in a mental hospital and eventually turn into a psychopathic killer constantly taunting batman.
we're all just human, lets accept we have bad days, post it on facebook, wait for replies about how we shouldn't be depressed and tell people thanks because what we really don't want to be is sad AND alone.