I’ve seen some interesting things over the past few days.
Specifically, I’ve seen a lot of emotions flare out and kept in due to reasons I shall not disclose.
I’ve seen laughter as we watched someone we know do something that seemed funny. Although if you’re someone like Russell Peters, whose jokes are racist and you’re sensitive to racial issues, maybe it doesn’t seem as funny.
Which then brings us to anger. If you take offense at a joke, its likely you’re unhappy with what that joke implies. Jokes can be in poor taste admittedly, if you are aware that the topic you’re poking fun at is one close and dear to another’s heart.
Ignorance is not necessarily an excuse but it is a forgivable omission. If you are unaware that someone’s parents are divorced and you make a joke about why (in context with the moment and the discussion at the time) and that person has kept a very private life and has yet to tell anyone, are you to blame?
It is the very equivalent of the drivers who back over toddlers due to the fact they are unaware that the child is standing there. I’ve seen them on Oprah and Dr.Phil, they were ignorant and have never forgiven themselves, almost to the point of suicide.
At this point, it is worthy to note that jokes in poor taste normally ignite sorrow to the person who is sensitive to the issue rather than anger.
Anger normally ignites when the joke is used for that particular intention.
Ther-ee Fore-ee, jokes in poor taste should be looked at for their intention to see if one should be angry or sorrowful.
And as a continuation of above, sorrow has reared its head as well these past few days.
Whether it comes from apologies from ignorance, or the loss of something you’ve worked so hard towards, or from someone you thought you could trust betraying you.
Sorrow normally turns to anger when you are unable to forgive those who have made you feel sorrow. When someone undeserving takes what was rightfully yours. When the person you trust suddenly reveals their true colours.
What right do we have however to feel anger? To not forgive?
This is what has stuck in my head, observing these emotions.
Why are we blaming others for the hate that is in our own hearts?
I know the iron grip of anger, I am human. When someone I know has hurt me, of course I feel my blood start to boil and my fist start to clench.
And then I separate myself from the animal and think. Does that person intentionally want to hurt me? What is his intention? Is he/she just ignorant? Is what they said true? Why am I angry?
If they were trying to hurt me, why should I give them the satisfaction of seeing me hurt? Should I not just rest my heart and keep my face still so that I do not give them what they want? The best way to defeat a bully is to stand up to them. Giving in to a bully only makes them want to hurt you more.
If they did not mean to hurt me, why should I keep that anger in my heart? What good does it do me to stay angry at a person who does not understand why this anger has appeared? Is it not best if I explain to them why I feel that anger, or share with someone I care about what ails my mind? If that person did not know me, how can I be angry at them for making a statement they had no idea would offend me?
Some of you might say, just don’t say anything then. This argument doesn’t work because some people may take offense at silence. There is no way that you can say something and have 6 billion people not take offense at it.
Eg. “Good morning!”
Reply:”What’s so good about it?” ~Grumpy tone~
Another idea that I must refer to is Why am I angry when someone says that about me? I am unable to answer this as I am rarely angry at people’s statements regarding me. I am a fool at times, admittedly. I can be stupid, so spread the word. I am pussy-whipped, which is your point of view which you are entitled to have. I don’t take things seriously enough, alas you are once again right. I am a bad friend, which may be true because I cannot be a good friend to everybody.
So, it should be the case you are angry because someone told you the truth about yourself that you cannot accept or a lie.
Even for a lie, for you to feel anger, there must be a sliver of truth. If it was a complete lie, you would feel nothing because everyone around you would know it was a lie and have no impact on your being.
Quote: All rumours have a grain of truth.
Other emotions I have seen are guilt, fear, variations of elation, scores of sadness and waves of spite in different magnitudes.
Before I leave you to tend to emotions of your own, let me ask you:
If you had made a mistake, how would you feel if those you had hurt had never forgiven you?
I know I would have no friends today if none of them had forgiven me.