Pieces To The Puzzle

We are slowly getting word of how our crazy year will be spent. Jon starts clinicals in September, though still no word where(unimportant detail anyway,right). But we do know the following...
Oct-Dec... St. Louis, Missouri
Jan-Feb... Aurora,Colorado
March-April...Utah!!!
May...?
June...?
July...probably New Mexico
August...?
We feel so blessed with how things are turning out. And I'm also learning to be patient and not whine so much. I just can't help that I am a planner. I have to evaluate and change my mind five times before I make a decision. Changing your mind that much takes time! Anyway, it's turning up futile to try and plan temporary housing in advance so I guess it didn't really matter not knowing. At least now I can sit up at 1am and look at craigslist for housing, etc. It feels sorta productive :)

Face plant, a question and the best dad ever

Benson sitting and smiling for the camera

Benson face planting.  He does this occassionally.  He actually did this yesterday on the kitchen counter trying to grab some food.  Smashed his face on the counter, but he didn't even cry.  Why does he do this?  No idea, he can proficiently sit on his own.  Crazy kid.

The mess that your face becomes after a face plant.



 So we did a shoot tonight for some friends who are leaving Florida and heading west.  I'm really sad to see them go.  But I sincerely hope we'll be able to meet up with them in Utah...one day.  They are a great family and we had so much fun doing their pictures.  We brought the kids.  We usually do.  We figure one of us can shoot while the other watches and then we trade.  In the past it has worked okay, but Vanessa desperately wanted to play with the other kids.  Remember how big of a deal friends are to her.  So poor Jon was chasing her and having to pull her out of the picture all the time.  Probably the last time Vanessa comes to a shoot.  It was all okay at the end of the day when we went to McDonalds and she ate an entire hamburger!  Go Vanessa.  I knew she could eat!  So you're probably wondering about the question part.  That's Benson.  He does this all day long.  Raising his hand, like he has a question.  I've asked him a couple times if he has a question and he always shakes his head "no" like he knows what I am asking.  That kid cracks me up.  And doesn't this picture make you look at it and just think... that looks like the best dad in the whole world?  Well it should, cause he is :)

Check it Out

A few new posts....JayElle Photography

New Beach and The Proof

Proof of sunscreen application

We drove to Key Biscayne and went to the Cape Florida Lighthouse.  It was worth seeing once, but probably not worth going back.  As it got later and later, the beach started to smell worse and worse, like sulfur.  Odd.

Stranger Anxiety

I'm not sure if anyone even noticed but in one of the pictures from Vanessa's birthday, Benson is in the background looking extremely upset. It breaks my heart. Enter mom can't leave me stage. I have a really hard time with this stage. I struggled with it with Vanessa to no end. Most people here don't even know Vanessa had a stranger anxiety stage. She went to nursery like a champ and never really had any problems. But she had it bad up until about a year. And I had it so bad that I didn't leave her. I can think of maybe five times that I left her and four of those five, she was with my mom, who we lived with, and Vanessa was fine with her. So, now that Benson has entered this stage, I am feeling that familiar anxiety as well. Maybe it's because I am a psych major, maybe it's because I spent way too much time at DCFS (as an employee, not a client), I feel like I can't leave him when he is showing that anxiety. I start to get anxious and worry about the long term implications. What if it causes attachment problems? What if it makes him feel like I've abandoned him? What it makes him think he can't count on me? And what if it does absolutely nothing at all and I stressed for no reason?
At least he is darn cute right? I mean, who wouldn't want to be around this face all day?

Good Reads

I realize most people don't share my obsession about childbirth, but since most women do give birth, I thought I would review some of the books I have read. My #1 recommendation if you were to only read one book is The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth. But, here are some other thoughts:

Books:
HypnoBirthing: the Mongan Method by Marie F. Mongan (wasn't helpful to me for labor, but others have liked it)

The Birth Book by Dr Sears (loved it)

The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth by Henci Goer (great information, great compilation of research)

Husband Coached Childbirth by Dr Bradley (also a good one. If I could afford these classes, I would have taken these. This is most similar to what I used in labor)

Natural Childbirth the Bradley Way by Susan McCutcheon-Rosegg, Erick Ingraham, Robin Yoko Burningham and Robert A. Bradley (another great Bradley book)

Birthing From Within by Pam England and Rob Horowitz (a little too hippie, even for me)

Ina May's Guide to Childbirth by Ina May Gaskin (great info from a great midwife)

The Baby Book by Dr Sears (covers pregnancy, birth, and breastfeeding briefly but mostly about baby care. All of it is great though. As one woman put it, it's a Baby Bible, LOL)

What to Expect When You're Expecting by Heidi Murkoff (I shouldn't say it's a waste of time, but I didn't feel there was anything to be learned that your doc wouldn't tell you. It's a fluffy bare minimum book)

The Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnany by Vicki Iovine (same as above with some humor)

Homebirth in the Hospital by Stacey Marie Kerr (stories of births by a family doctor, interesting but not a lot of useful info)

The Official Lamaze Guide:For a Healthy Pregnancy and Birth by Judith Lothian (felt pretty fluffy, I wouldn't recommend this one)
Pushed by Jennifer Block (I couldn't finish this one when I
was prego so I'll have to get back to it. It made me upset with the whole medical model of birth)

Childbed Fever (SO interesting, a biography about Ignaz Semmelweis and OBs learning to wash their hands)
WHO website
Cochrane Libraries online

Vanessa's Birthday

Was clear back on May 20.  We had a joint party for her at the splash park.  Jon wasn't able to go since this was during the day, so we had cake and ice cream and opened gifts from the family the day of. 

I can't believe she is 2.  She thinks she is older of course.  She is talking like crazy.  Lately, everything is a need, as opposed to just something she wants. 
"I need  my animals" or "I need chocolate."  We definitely have a choco-holic on our hands.  As well as a general sweets lover.  Vanessa still loves going to nursery and "playing with the kids."  Her friends are already a big deal.  I swear we pay attention to her and play with her, but Sam, Lily and Jack are sooo much cooler.
She likes to say she will do whatever someone else is doing too.  For instance, if Lily says, "I'll go get my boots."  Vanessa will say "I'll go get my boots too."  She does this with everything.  It's confusing to people sometimes.  Especially in nursery when she says she needs to go potty just cause one of the other kids did, even though she refuses to actually go on the potty.  She will sit on the potty when her diaper is on, but if I try to take her diaper off to have her sit, it's the end of the world.  Silly girl. 
Vanessa knows all her colors and shapes.  She has no interest in counting, the alphabet, or going potty.  Everything is on her time schedule.  Which honestly, I am fine with. 
She is doing tons better at night.  But Jon and I have completely relented and let her come in bed with us, she usually saunters in around midnight.  She just sleeps so much better knowing mom and dad are close.  Plus, it's about the only time we feel like she actually needs us still so we'll suck it up for all it's worth :)  I also happen to think she is scared of the dark.  When she wakes up, she won't leave our room until I go turn on the light in another room, because "its dark, mommy."
Vanessa still loves her animals.  These things go everywhere.  We have started limiting her to two animals for outings.  These usually results in a frantic decision at the door, but she has decided it's okay. 
Naps are pretty much a thing of the past.  She naps occassionally.  And usually it's when we are on our way home from somewhere around 1:00 or 2:00.  She usually needs a nap around 4:00 or 5:00 but if I let her nap at this time, she is up incredibly late and I just can't do that.  So, we have to push through a couple rough hours sometimes in order to hit the sack around 7:00.  She'll sleep until 8:00am though, so it isn't all bad.  Then Jon and I get a few hours in the evening with little Benson man.  He goes to bed around 9:00pm usually. 
Vanessa is so much fun.  We laugh at this girl all the time.  She has started doing this little snort thing that just makes me laugh everytime.  It's so un-lady like and so funny!  She is the sweetest thing in the world.  She gives Benson kisses any time he starts crying, even if it's because she just hit him.  Sometimes I swear she makes him cry so she can "kiss it better." 
I feel like I narrate my life to Vanessa.  Whenever I leave the room, I tell her.  I tell her where I am going and that I will "be right back."  This has caused Vanessa to narrate her life to me.  "I go get diaper mommy, be right back."  "I go get wagon mommy, be right back."  I love it.  I think it's the cutest thing ever.
Vanessa also just got a darling little haircut yesterday.  We cut off about an inch (not me, but my friend did) and stacked the back.  Also trimmed up her bangs so they aren't always in her face.  Hallelujah.  It was much needed!  Pics to come.  It's been a crazy 24 hours so I haven't taken any yet.