Monday, January 31, 2005

heyy.today was an extremely slack day.i was like chatting in class during lessons and crapping.like look for this word in this para with aprie..ms lavina din come so slacked.lucky she teaches eng.coz she isnt coming tml i think. during free period i was packing my stuff and slacking la duh.mr lim came into class to relief.er,nth to say la hor.
stop slacking and dreaming la valerie.

anyway,got home considerably early.have to edit proposal.haiz.nvm.tml have chi test.prac havent studied yet.mrs kwek gave us such a big shock when she came into class and said the test was today.she said there wasnt any diff b/w today and tml.a matter of 24hrs only?!she was asking how much cld we study in a day.actually qt alot leh.hmms.but she bluff us la.summore laugh until so happy.nearly died of shock.coz the pp she gave i prac all dunno how to do coz i havent prepared yet.haiz.lesson learnt:dont procrastinate.

meeting today aft sch.din attend first part so din know what was gg on.erm,dun understand why some pple like to sit in the sun.heex.

i dream too much.think too much.lala land is gonna disappear soon.i predicted by now i wld have enough.but no.i was wrong.still as mad.when will it stop?

my 1st impressions of pple are v strong.and many many many havent changed yet.they still remain as +ve or -ve.these peeps still remain as what they were.or at least in my mind la.have failed to change my -ve impressions of them.this is very pathetic. i wish i cld like forget abt all these unhappy or not so happy things that i rmb abt pple.but i'm not that type.i admire pple who can forget things easily.it may not be a bad thing you know.hmmx.

tests this wk.aft this wk.more tests and more tests.fun right.bleahx.sec 3s arh,better treasure yr time leh.will pass very fast one.hehx/

haiz.this entry ends on a pathetic note once again.

keep smiling =) irony

i seriously seriously cant stand the f word.hearing it makes me shiver.i have to siam once i hear it if not i cant concentrate on whatever i'm doing.i dunno wats wrong with me.

i dunno whats wrong with me.cant concentrate in class.my mind is like in lala land la.thinking abt stuff and evt.haiz.

i am dreaming.wake up valerie.it will not come true..dream on la.

ahaha.i realised that what i last posted was so confusing.nvm.i like it.=) wei,you look damn spas in tt photo man.what were you thinking? (",)getting married alr arh? hehx.

okayy.syf is coming.oac is coming.o level chi is coming.oral is coming.haiz.life is a cycle.a boring one.ahaha.i am gg crazy.

Sunday, January 30, 2005

its been so long since i've updated.my blog's activity is very stagnant.ya.been qt bz these few wks.but i havent reached my peak yet.hehx.

well.many many things happened over these few days.some happy,some sad.also some disappointing some joyous.life is a see saw.ups and downs.part and parcel of the way of life - 4! to the power of infinity *winks to pamella*

found out that some pple arent what they seem.some look very blur and lost but inside they are very mature and grown up.heh heh *grins*are you reading this?some look very mature and smart and nice evt thing but inside actually they are freaks who are damn selfish.

I dread periods of time when i am alone where i have plenty of time for self reflection.where i think abt my past few days and the unhappy and negative thoughts come into mind.yes,i know i shldnt dwell on the past and unhappy things for what is the pt of crying over spilt milk.things that are done cant be undone.hmmx.yeahs,dwelling on the past isnt a very wonderful thing to do.and obviously shedding tears are of no use la.but i am not that sort who can forget very easily.i wish to be so.but i am not.theres not much i can do though.except to keep myself preoccupied.now come to think of it.i shldnt be so unhappy and evt.coz i am very very lucky compared to others.i have a happy family,gd frens,a roof over my head,a bright future with education.equal opportunites in life.and evt.i am irritated with myself.haiz

trying to remain positive and optimistic.for its only the beginning of the yr.pressure is starting to build up.but my peak hasnt reached yet.i dread that day when i explode.

i detest myself for being an emotional freak.cry too easily.read touching letters, cry.pple tell me their prob, i cry.not out of symphaty,but out of the hurt and pain when i know i cant do anything to help.i think too much.i am a freak.haiz

i am not who you think i am.

you break my heart very often.even though you do not know.i dont know whether you do.i seriously dont.and i hope you dont even.you make my heart melt with your smile and laughter.your constant encouragement and motivation serve as a light to my dark tunnel.but i do not know.what to do,how to react.i know that you know.but i dont know for sure if you really really understand.complicated.arhhx.i learn to take one step at a time.maybe one day you will understand coz i cant tell anyone yet.

Saturday, January 15, 2005

it has been qt some time since i updated.gg to be e 3rd wk of sch-jan's almost coming to an end. time passes so quickly.alw say tt no time no time.but actually time is in our control just that we cant control it.5 day wk officially started.this is the 1st sat i'm at home.decided to slack today. some peeps think that 5 day wk is bad, some think its gd. for me?idontreallycare coz its beyond my control.but i have to admit that 5 day wk makes all our lives much more hectic during the wkdays, i've been reaching home evd at ard 7plus 8.but slping in on sat is great!haha.it feels gd to wake up late for once.but sat was meant to be a day where we make up for our loss of study during the wk.and unfortunately, i am not able to do that.i procratinate too much. i realised that nowadays i cant concentrate in class.tomanythingsonmymind.haiz.

recently i realised i laugh alot.really alot. the other day, i was laughing for 1 hr straight.my stomach or diaphragm [watever] hurt so much til i had no appetite to eat.gd exercise for my diaphrahm muscles so i can vibrato nx time. =) anyway, i realised i laugh alot when i see zl.she makes me wanna laugh evt.her face is so amusing and comical.aiya.i'm mad la.wateva. nanny also makes funny comments and yuanli too.during tution, ms chee was kinda irritated. coz we were attending the sec 3 class, yuanli made so many comments.i was not even concentrating.wasted my time.in the end, me and weisan ended up doing out the qns b4 she went thru.and i felt like puking coz ammonia gas aka NH3 was prevalent.some peeps had vvvvv bad bodyodour.and i mean HORRIBLE BO. it felt asif i wld choke.really.somemore i was sitting so close to them.ohmans. NH3 really smells bad in the lab.worse than chlorine.oh mans.i hate that smell and e bad thing is have to smell it throughout the yr.

i think mon there is going to be a binomial test.mr tay's suprise tests.. okayy.. see how i die.

i dont know why but pple always assume that becoz i'm a prefect i have to be v hardworking, v not slack. and blahs.like i'm human too wat. i have my own character and i dont think i shld be judged by the title i have. then when i comment that i am being v slack, pple say i am v irritating. wateva okay.

i am getting v annoyed with some pple who cant seem to control themselves. dont even set a gd eg for others to follow and then still irritate me somemore by showing me.anything la.i cant control you and you cant control me.do whateva you want and i wish you all the best okayy.if you get caught dont come crying to me.