Happy 2015. What a year 2014 had been. Was it good? Or was it bad? That I Can't comment. All I can say is that it wasn't good But there are moments that I treasured.
It's been a year that I'm back n somehow I still always wish I wasn't back here. I miss London, I miss living alone, I miss having the freedom, most of all, I miss that I would not have gone thru the whole misery bullshit that I went thru the whole of last year.
Did I became a better person? Well, it depends on how u view on it. Personally, I would say I grew a lot. N I have more to grow on. Was I Happy? Somewhat. Sorry dudes, I wasn't ready. (Not that I will ever be with u few.) Nope, I'm not pretty, not smart, not helpful, not kind, nothing wonderful about me at all. I'm just another fat, below average girl. But I'm just very thankful I am still alive despite so much thoughts of suicide, hurting myself and so on. But then who knows, Maybe it might happen the next day, or a week later or a month later or whenever.
Yup, I have became negative. Very very negative. Was it Cause of this job? Somewhat. Was it Cause of something? Somewhat. All accumulated n resulted in me! Hooray!!!!
I don't wish for much this year. Just everything to go smoothly n just be Happy. In this reality now that I live in, happiness have gone away. How to get it back? I Can't. Or Maybe some other time.
All I am glad is that I have a job (not that I'm Happy with it), food on the table, bags on discounts, a roof over my head, my family and friends. Maybe That's all I can be asking for. Just glad that I can count my blessing for everyday that I'm alive, is another day to be thankful for.
