What a miss!

Oh my gosh!! I’ll be missing out on Anderson Homecoming and 47 gathering!! :( And I realised I forgot totally about Teachers’ Day when I was here! Haha, i dreamt of mama chong and mdm tey TWICE!! They were at my school in one of my dreams! Oohh, they are dearly missed! :P As I was reminiscing the awesome memories, I realised how important Mrs Lim was in my life. Effectively, she was the one who made multiple turning points in my life. :) Basically, she transformed a wild baboon into a tamed one. Ok, it’s a super long story on it. So, let’s stop here.

Hey 47 peeps, pls take loads of pics and have tonnes of fun! Can’t wait to have a big bash over at my place next May! :)

Desktop Wallpaper. :)

Hee.. Just changed my desktop wallpaper from the bottom one to the top.

Top: A pair of black knights flying a march pass. :) Think it fits nicely on my screen, with the planes at my eye level. SOoo cool!

Bottom: Our dear A380 Airbus. We are FIRST to fly it commercially. Cheers! :)

Any interested people?

I found some good stuff on aerospace and aviation in Singapore. Anyone interested please either email or leave a tag. I'll tell you more in an email. There are some good opportunities right under your nose! Should be useful for those with attachments in year 3. :)

Haha, sorry, I'll try to find share some good stuff on other industries as well. I'll sneak into business faculty next semester more to see if I can get my hands on some sweet information. I know there's like a tonne of people studying that now. Will see what I can do. :)

Winter trip!

Hi pple, here is my winter trip for the whole of my winter break. See if you can catch me anywhere! :)

21/12: Flight to Lake Tahoe, California
22-26/12: Ski! whee! Christmas here plus snowball fight! :)
26/12: Depart Lake Tahoe for San Francisco.
28/12-1/1: Tour San Fran. Celebrate New Year here! Oh my goodness, it's 2009!!
2/1-4/1: Yosemite National Park and surrounding areas
5/1: Reach Las Vegas
5/1-7/1: Tour LS Vegas. Oh no, underage, cannot gamble!! haha :)
8/1-9/1: Grand Canyon
10/1-17/1: Tour LA
17/1: Evening flight from LA to chicago
18/1: Go Northwestern and disturb fellow Singaporeans??!! :P
p.s.: hengjie and suet, can't wait to see you both soon! :)

ok, pple, i hope I won't go Missing In Action(MIA) for the whole of one mth. There's internet connection over at some hotels, so will try to update as and when it's possible. Miss you guys loads! :)

A trade, anyone?

Okie, i'm here to take a short break from mugging. :)

Anyone wants to go California? I am so willing to trade that air ticket for a flight back to singapore.. No doubt I'm going to learn tonnes of things and have tonnes of fun in Cali, but i really miss Singapore. :( I miss my family and friends. I want to go back! And guess what? Oil prices dropped and so did the price of the air ticket back to Singapore. But i know I will not pull out from my trip as it's just irresponsible to do so. And worst still, I was the one who gave the big picture for the itinery. Lesson to learn: Stop coming out with cranky ideas. :P My friends from other schools are flying back this week, but i'm still stuck here with cornfields. :( Why is my school term soo long??!! I start earlier and end later.

But please don't worry so much, i'm just whinig, not complaining. I'm still thankful for what I have now, really. I'm not in a position to complain about anything.

I think I have listened to NDP songs a thousand times thusfar. Everytime I on my laptop now, it's the playlist I'll never fail to click on. It's my source of motivation to keep on going, though it still fails at times, when I'm super emo, as usual. If I were to take a personality test again, I think I'll become a "feeler" instead of a "thinker".

Ok, CWZT, F-O-C-U-S-- FOCUS!

Grades...

Pls don't be shocked if I don't get any As this semester. I don't think my grades can jump into the 90+% range. I don't know how to describe this. I was hoping to get As, yet i'm actually quite satisfied with my current grades. Perhaps I am very used to Singapore's grading system. I'll still try my best to aim for my As, but in any case I don't get it, I know i've really tried my best.

Please?

I've never wanted something so badly before. I really really really want it. God, really really really please?

:'(

My deepest and most sincere condolences to Lo Hwei Yen's family. I'm truly saddened by the loss of a fellow Singaporean. My heart cried terribly...

Fortune cookie

Fortune cookie: You are deeply attached to your family and home.

:)

I think i've said this a thousand times, but i still wanna say it again. :) I really love everyone in my life coz they are really awesome people! That includes YOU! :) You guys make my life really AWESOME! oh and yes, very homesick also. haha.. =) Can't wait to see everyone in summer!! Wait for mmeeee!!

It snowed on monday morning! white, flurry snow! :)

*HUGS EVERYBODY* :)

=)

"This is because Singapore is confident of the long-term prospects of the aerospace sector..." said Mr S Iswaran, Senior Minister of State for Trade and Industry. - The Straits Times

Haha, YES, well said! :P Ok, this is a biased point of view. Please continue with your efforts in developing this industry in sg. I promise i'll be back in 2018 to fight for sg in this sector!! :) RR, wait for me!!

ELECTION DAY!!

The atmosphere here was really awesome! I ran around, trying to get the best atmosphere in my school. haha, and even stood on table to watch the LIVE telecast! I'm really impressed with these bunch of American kids. Shall further elaborate why next time, as it's going to be a super long analysis. Obama is truly an excellent motivational speaker! " Yes, we can!"

Yes, YOU can, CWZT! You'll survive the next 2 wks! :)

*&%&^$%^&$#$*(*^

ARGHHH, WHY IS THERE SOOO MUCH WORKKKK AND EXAMSSS????!! :( :(

Yes, i know i should stop whining. arggghhh...

Anw, i realised I can finish my course in 2.5 years. YEAHH!! BUT.... it's
study as much while you can VS work experience owns mugging experience.

Option 1: Take a minor to fill out my last semester, i.e. 3 years course.
Option 2: Do a semester internship.

Hey pple, election is TOMORROW!! I'm going to catch it! Sorry, digression.. You can take a vote now- choose 1 or 2!! Feel free to elaborate on your choice as it'll help me a great deal! :)Pls take part in my life, as I'm pretty much a dying soul now..

Byyyeee pple, i have to go back to my mugging world. An awesome THREE exams plus a 20% philo essay coming up!! WOOOHHHOOOO!!!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!! :D

Ok pple, here's some pics before I disappear for the next 2 wks! :)


Pls see the pics starting from the bottom, coz lazy to reshuffle.. haha!! =)




haha, everyone has gone cranky!

Vampire with a Slytherin...

Look at that BIG, FAT pumpkin!

Aiyo, vampire got her blood sucked instead.. -.-'''

Out for a mission: The thirst for BBLLOOOOOODDDD!!!

AARRHHH!! SCARY VAMPIRE IS OUT! TEAMING WITH ANOTHER MALE VAMPIRE!





ok, improving, starting to look abit more scary..

Woots, vampire in the making.. A friendly vampire.

Emo-ish. Tremedously.

I'm super emo now, 2.40am on a Halloween Night. I've had a fun night, which made me emo in return. Irony. Indeed.

Before I left Singapore, I was told of the following:
- Don't forget to call home.
- Don't party or play too much.
- Don't forget us.
...

Basically, i would say that even I myself think that I won't miss home that much. By home, i mean everybody that I know, every place I've been. I suppose most would think so too. Maybe because I'm so easily fascinated by my surroundings, and I get emotionally attached to a place or people pretty easily. Just take the two jobs I've taken earlier this year. I've really forged great relationships with people I work with. Can you imagine travelling with people whom you've just known for 1-2 mths, and had tonnes of fun? I really enjoyed their company.

Ironically, I'm the one who misses home the most here. Unbelievable. Maybe part of the attributing factor is that I've changed alot ever since I'm here. Yes, I'm only for 2 months, but I've changed tremendously. As to exactly what has changed, I would explain further next time.

Today, I saw scenic skies, people in all sorts of costumes, nice decorations, had fun, etc. Whenever I experience such things, I always had the thought that I must so share these awesome experience with all of you. I must so tell you all what I've seen and heard.

I thought it through the night. The most possible reason is that I'm so used to experience nice and fun stuff with all of you. Suddenly, I'm having these experiences ALONE, without you people. I did found very good friends here. But, it's just different. No longer can i go crazy with you. No longer can I share such fun experiences with you. No longer can I mug hard with my friends with upcoming exams...

Simply put, you people are just irreplaceable.

I feel like giving up my 2015 plan, and just go back in 2011 after my degree. Would it be a rational thing to do? My logical part of my brain says no. I don't know.. Doing so would disrupt my 2020 plans as well. Basically, all my plans till then would need to change. Yes, I must be crazy in planning till so far. But I see just the opportunities all the way till then. I don't know how, but I just see the way I want to progress into. Maybe everything may collaspe eventually, since all are based on my predictions, what I foresee. *Confused mind*

Prelude to "Change in Me": I've become such a serious person that I think I've lost my crappiness.

=)

This is one of my favorite songs I've learnt here in my church. :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W6BwPIgcAvA

It's simply AWESOME- think through the lyrics. :) It's just amazing, it's been 2 mths, I thought that "soo touched" feeling may die off once i'm used to it. BUT, it didn't. And i'm loving it! =)


P.S. Simone, ur post made me emo! I'll review it, together with rach's post next wk. I'm really homesick, how I wish I can fly back now...

Plans till june 2009

Ok, here, I shall share on what my plans will be for the following months.

Thanksgiving week(nov): Trip to Florida. That's to universal studio, maimi beach, etc. :)
Woots, 2wks later will then be our final exams! but hey, we really really need a gd break! :)

Dec: Trip to California. Tentative itineray: Flight to San Fran, drive down to LA, yes, Christmas in Disneyland!! :) Then train up to Grand Canyon, then go down to Las vegas, then back to San Fran. Flight back to Chicago. Then maybe going skiing before school starts again! :)

That's Plan B.

Plan A: I signed up for a Silicon Valley Program. So if I'm accepted into the program, then i'll still spend christmas in disneyland, then continue with the 2wks program in jan. :)

Yes, that means sacrificing some fun time with my friends. But I think places of interest can wait, but such good opportunities like to SV don't always come. It's like how often do you get to talk to bosses of such reknown companies??!! And it's certainly a good learning opportunity. What's more? I'm subsidized 80% of the cost! AWESOME!! :)

Springbreak(march09): Trip to Canada

May 09: GO BACK TO SINGAPORE!! :)
June 09: Summer program in Jordan

ok, this is a change from the original plan, wanted to go for summer program first, then go back sg. haha, so can experience national day!! :)BUT, jordan's program start in last wk of june. :( So gotta switch the order. BUT, that also means I can see you all EARLIER!! :) Patriotism has no choice but to take a stand behind.. sorry.. though i wld really really love to go for ndp...

It's not confirmed yet, but should not be too many of a change. I MUST GO BACK SINGAPORE!

Ok, I'm too tired to blog about some emo and serious stuff as it really requires tonnes of energy. Next time k.. :)

I'm back, finally! :)

Hello pple, I'm back!:) haha, bet all of you are waiting soo eagerly for my next update, so here I am!

I was soooo busy since my last post, that I died at an exponential rate as the weeks go by. And this week was the week that I died at the point of absolute zero, just can't die any further. Oops, that sounds kind of morbid, but hey, Halloween is next friday, and it's a BIG event here! :)Ok, shan't elaborate on how I died soo badly so as not to spread pessimism.. Just a few MYTHS here:

1. Uni is slacker than JC.
2. US is slacker than Singapore. Here, I don't mean tougher, as it'll be unfair to say that, since I've not gone through uni in Singapore. Just not the sterotype that pple here don't study or slack. Be amazed by their intelligence and diligence! They solve questions faster and more accurate than me, they understand lectures so much better than me, they are very clear and concise in their train of thoughts. SImply put, they are SUPER GOOD!

Perhaps it's just the case if you are doing engineering in a relatively good enginnering school. They simply suck in every tinge of soul and spirit you have.

Also, appreciate if you have time for CCA! I simply don't have time for CCAs. Nonetheless, I've set certain things to do every week to ensure holistic development.

1. One sports session at least, either trying out a new sport or just work out. Haha, it's pretty fun to play broomball. It's like hockey on ice. Just that you play with this equipment that resembles that of a broom, and you wear shoes while running on ice. Don't understand Newton's Law of action-reaction? Play this! Haha, I slip and fell barely 5 mins into the ice rink while trying to shoot the ball into the goalpost. After which, i made some sense out of it and applied the Newton's Law! wahaha, APPLICATION of knowledge. :P

2. One event run by the any club or school. This is to expose myself to their culture and the fun things they do for leisure. Shall post some photos on pumpkin carving next time. :)

As I've got tonnes to share, I shall make it more reader-friendly by dividing my posts by themes. Enjoy! :)

Dedication to ...

Ok, this poat is dedicated to my super AA-attract attention, super perfectionist and super les friend of mine! :)

So, what's soo special about this person? She drew her timetable not in a common or convenient scale of 4.0 or 4.5cm. BUT IN A SUPER PERFECTIONIST MEASUREMENT OF 4.4CM!!! *faints* Ya, so that the timetable will sit nicely on that sheet of paper. -.- And in the middle of the night of about 1am, we are doing reports of our PW report. And guess what? She was there trying every might to keep the sizes of the flowchart boxes EXACTLY the same, and PERFECTLY ALIGNED. And to a super untidy person like me, i was like, "OMG! Are you kidding me? You are doing that just to keep things aligned and neat?!" Had i been evil, i would have chased her out of my house! :P haha, perhaps that saying that opposites attract is real. Despite being VASTLY different in this aspect, we've been really good friends, and we literally talk for HOURS on the phone into the wee hours of the night.. haha, and we worked together earlier this yr, to the same employer, and to the same place. :) oohhh, soo much like superglue!

ok, my dear AA, perfectionist, les friend, are you satisfied? :P IS IT PERFECT ENOUGH? Any alignment which I didn't do very well?!! wahaha!!! :D AAWW, i'm soo sweet, i'm sure you feel soo much warmed now in the UK.. :)

Dedication to 47 :)

Hii lovely pple, here, i'll take the chance to say a very BIG THANK YOU to all of you! :) I happen to listen to "tong hua" the song, and instinctively, and my hand took out the lovely sketchbook you've made. Reading it once again was a ultimate source of motivation. =)I shall just quote a few that struck me hard while reading:

- nobody said it would be easy- confirm will emo elmo sometimes..
- Let's spread the 47 love around, no matter where you are
- i'm one step closer to my dream
.
.
.
of course there's many more.. Yes, it motivated me to keep my enthusiasm and passion for life and everything. Though I'll be away for a few years, i'll try my best not to let 47 spirit die down. It'll be harder to meet up as the years go by, but hopefully we'll still get to meet at least once a yr. You pple have given me really fond memories and it's you who understand myself better. Haha, i have to admit that i do really childish things such as celebrating children's day, balloons in class,etc. THANKS for tolerating my childish-ness! :)And hey, can someone enlighten me how on earth did you all manage to get that sketchbook done? i'm interested to know? YOu all pass to the next uni issit? :S Anw, it's really splendid and i'll fill it with pics and notes by the time i finish my business here! :)

Special appearance :)

Hello!! Surprise with me appearing here on TUESDAY?! :)

Anw, i'm here because i've just finished two depressing papers. :( It's a marathon, a mega 5.5hrs of classes and one quiz and one exam. And what's an exam without having dinner??!! That's excluding another 2.5hrs worth of lectures i had earlier. It's seriously squeezing out every single drop of brain juice i've had left, and causing my already high temperature to sky rocket further. I can literally feel my forehead BURNING! So, i'm pretty much brain dead now.. But still gotta mug later, so decided to come here and slack for while. :)

haha, actually i'm not soo depressed now. Thanks to my Singapore friends!! =) Part of the gang were mugging together, and knowing that i'm pretty sad, they called and guess what they did?? They actually played my fav NDP song to the phone!! AWWW... SOOO SWEET!! =) It's really awesome to hang out with them, a truly lovely bunch of pple! :) haha, so much so that we simply share our viruses as well! :P I'm currently the 3rd victim to catch the virus, and apparently, the virus has mutated or evolved into a more intelligent species and it whacked me with all the symptoms the previous two had suffered from. And Panadol simply wowed me! It made me had sleepless nights instead! -.-'' Today shall be the last day of experiment, if it fails me again, I'll stop taking it. :)

Ok, let's get on to some serious stuff. Recently, i realised that you have to understand and play with the system to achieve what you want in a more efficient way, or in certain cases, simply to get what you want. Being as stubborn as an ox, i learn it from the hard way, and i have to say that i learn it real hard too. i would certainly hope to share my two cents worth with all of you, but i can't broadcast it here in public. duh..

To those who want to study abroad, but are already in local unis, don't worry, as there are really good deals around. To those who have not even entered uni, there's a really SPLENDID deal to fight for. It's the best I could ever think of. Really. To those who want to work abroad or an internship or co-op overseas, there are TONNES of opportunities, if only you are willing to source them out. So, I would say that so long you put your heart into what you want, there's a high chance you'll get it. And also important is that you UNDERSTAND how the system works. Once you get it, things will go smoother, and you'll know how to react to those possible obstacles. Of course, make sure you meet the basic requirement first.

If you happen to want to know more about anything of the above, feel free to drop me an email, and we can try to work things out together. It's really really not a good feeling to know you can't get what you want because you realise it way too late, and especially when opptunities were RIGHT infront of you. Opportunites are there for you, it's just whether you see them as opportunities and go after them or not. Opportunities DON'T GO AFTER YOU! So i'm really willing to share with you my two cents worth, as I sincerely hope you can minimise whatever regret you may have in the future. Though, Regret, this word, has long been out of my dictionary. Shall explain more next time. Time to mug, byez! :)

A great relief.. :)

Hello everybody!! Here I am again after a week of hard-core mugging! So, although it's only thursday, i decided to give myself a reward by blogging a post. :) I simply lavished myself with rewards today! HAPPYYYY!!! =)

I am super duper happy, because I've stretched my limits! I managed with about 5-6hrs sleep everyday thusfar, and am still surviving very well, though there were times when i drifted in and out of lectures. hee.. After this week, I'm pretty sure I can survive weeks with less sleep-even lesser than this week-in the near future. My comfort zone has been stretched. :))

Also, what made me really get to relax abit more is that I think i can finish what's due tmr tonight, finished 2 exams on mon, and the most unexpected thing is that I DON'T NEED TO REWRITE MY ENTIRE PHILOSOPHY ESSAY!! CHEERS!! I thought i'll need to rewrite most of it as it's my first time writing a phil paper, and i kind of squeezed it out with whatever remaining time I've left for the past two days. BUT I went to see my tutor today, and he said it's GOOD, with some minor things to change!! :)

I actually enjoyed that process of having to analyse the text, the different theories, and think of examples to further illustrate my points. I would not say it's easy, as the text itself was pretty hard to comprehend. I think I kind of like it as it's interesting. But i know i'll not say this when final exams are round the corner. And i don't know if it's my taking of philosophy, or other factors, I realised that i've been thinking alot more now. I'll try to share more on the tonnes of issues I've thought through recently. Haha, it's quite funny actually. I'm soo busy these few days, and my form of relaxation is to sit down and start thinking of these issues. -.-''

Anw, after my last lesson, I decided to reward myself by playing the piano, as I've wanted to since the start of the week, but simply no time for it. And guess what, I was actually trying to figure out how to play HOME by Kit Chan. And YEAH, i've figured out 90% of it, leaving the intro and ending. :) I also tried to play Shine on me, but ended up mixing these two together. -.-'' Anw, Shine on Me has become my favourite NDP song now!! I love it the moment i listened to it. But the funny thing is, i have absolute ZERO recollection of it, though it was the year that i went for NDP as part of National Education. That's super wierd, by right should have some impression of it, but just don't seem to remember. Maybe I was too engrossed in the parade then..

THE MOST UNEXPECTED THING HAPPENED. After i'm done, on my way out, a girl told me this, " Hey, you play very well!"

Clarissa was stunned. "Oh, thanks!" she replied. *Not knowing how to react*

Haha, actually I was kind of sure that she like it because of the nice songs. After I got the melody, I was trying to fit in the chords, so how nice can it get? So, must be the melody right?! Haha, anyway, was really glad as it proved that our Singapore songs are REALLY NICE!! :) maybe, i can spread the SIngapore propaganda through all these songs. wahaha!!:P Anyway, I aim to figure out those songs that i like soon! For now, i'll try to complete Home's intro and ending and Shine on me! WHEE!! :)

There are tonnes of things to tell of you!! But gotta stop here, have to finish my work, if not i won't get the chance to reward myself lavishly again.. F1 is tmr! but i can't watch. :( I'll be in my physics lab doing experiment when the motors cars start their EVER FIRST NIGHT RACE!-.-''

Go Singapore GO, I'm sooo proud of you! :)
To people who are working on the ground: Hey people, I know this and next week will be ultimate hectic for you, especially 26th-28th. Yes, you are lacking sleep, you have to stand all day and night, etc. But JIAYOU k!! You are involved in the INAUGURAL NIGHT RACE in SINGAPORE AND THE WWOORRLLDD!!! It'll be one of the most AWESOME experiences in your life. So hang in there! I'll give you my utmost MENTAL SUPPORT! :)

Bleh, I would be gaining first hand experience of the whole process if I were in Singapore.. :( And if Singapore does well, it'll be another 4 years, but i still can't catch it, i think. *ultimate sadness* Actually, think there's a chance, but i'll need to work on that contingency plan. NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE! :)

picnic at crystal lake

Arghh, sorry people, can't seem to align the pics together with the tags. Will try to figure out, or those who know, pls enlighten me. thx! :)Today's exam simply killed my drive to mug so decided to do something meaningful and useful by posting these long overdue pics! Enjoy!

*P.S. Listening to NDP songs brighten up my day! It's also good to listen while studying too! I've to force myself to stop at 1am yest! -.-'' But it's not useful for today's ridiculous paper! bleh.. ok, this is sooo out of pt, nvm, go look at the photos!*






Oh my, it's only 12PM, and we are drinking??!! :O


This is what happens if you drink in broad daylight! :)

trip to chicago :)

The famous silver bean!
Hey kungfu panda, what are you doing here?

Oohh, what am i doing inside? :)

Fountain :)
Pretty city line!

We took the subway to the heart of Chicago!

The final straw...

The very moment after my exam today, I was very eager to blog every single emotions and frustrations I've had for weeks. The exam was the final straw. Every bit of my intense, bottled-up feelings have finally exploded...

BUT, i've got another lecture to attend, which obviously, I wasn't in the mood to try to understand what's going on. Never understood anything since long ago anyway. Loads of thoughts were running through during that time. And after that, I decided not to spread negativity to all my blog-readers and/or create a viscious cycle in which some may, unfortunately, fall into. So i retracted on all the things that i'm intend to spew out initially.

Also, after doing some self-reflection, i think i can pinpoint the very root of all the pessimism, stress and unpleasant feelings to one reason- the fear of failure. Yes, there are some ridiculous questions like whether Newton wrote his Principala paper in Latin, etc. If i'm the old me, i.e., before this year, I would have taken it with a pinch of salt and laugh off that question.

But what i've experienced this year has totally changed part of me. I can literally feel and see the change. I would say that this is one of the happiest year in my life. I've truly enjoyed my work this year, as I was amazed by how close relationships can be forged within such a short time, i.e. one month; and i became clearer of whhich industry I'm going to branch into. I truly love working in Airshow and NDP and teaching; travelling for an awesome one month; and meeting with as many as people as possible before my departure. It was simply SPLENDID! :)

However, 2008 also marks to year which I felt the most intense pain EVER in my life. You can literally feel that your heart simply tore apart, bled profusely and cried incessantly...

I'm really tired of making decisions, especially making decisions that will make/destroy other people's lives indirectly. Ok, that's abit of exaggeration. But that's how I feel. I hate to screw up people's lives. If it concerns just me, I won't bother so much, because in any case anything fails, only i'm affected adversely. But i do also understand that decisions will be harder to make as i grow older.

At 4, I decide between sweets and biscuits.
At 8, I decide between vegetable rice and soup noodles.
At 12, I decide which secondary school to go.
At 16, I decided which JC to go.

FACT: These choices concern me ONLY, regardless of the decision I make.

I'm in the midst of thinking of a major issue in my life late last wk. The paths I want to take remain tightly closed. I've this feeling that I'm being forced out to do something which I don't mind doing, and am pretty interested in, but definitely hope it won't be a long-term thing. Maybe this path is meant to mould and prepare me for my ideal path. I hope this would be the true case.

Nonetheless, I need to weigh the opportunity cost. Woots, what a BIG word! haha.. Learnt it from godfather. That was what he said when he was analyzing and breaking down my case together with me. Felt a rock off my heart when we came to a conclusion, and we'll review it again next year.

Opps, realised that it's a super long post. But still got soo many things to say.. Nvm, shall not bore all of you here. *hugs* (coz i need one desperately.. haha! :P)

This was how i spent my sat night..

Last sat night, we were supposed to have a mid-autumn festival(MAF) celebration. But due to weather forecasts stating that there'll be thunderstorm, we postponed it to this coming sat.

So, after dinner, my friends and I went to the computer lab as I need to finish my graphic design, and they need to get somethings done as well. We reached the lab at abt 9pm plus and stayed there till about 12.30AM! First time staying back sooo late in school just to finish up my work!

Anw, the climax was at about 1145pm. By then, all of them are done with their computing stuff but i'm not exactly done with my assignment. So, one of my friends decided to add more life to the utterly quiet place by playing some... NDP songs from the net!! And that's it, I got SUPER HIGH, EMO AND PATRIOTIC!! ok, tt's like abit of a weird mix of feelings, but no matter what, I have to declare that "I LOVE SINGAPORE!!" ok, i see the goosebumps popping out from all of you. :P I kind of feel like flying back to Singapore immediately then.. Anws, my friends somehow got influenced and started singing the NDP songs. -.-''

Morale of the story? PATRIOTISM IS CONTAGIOUS! =)

Ok pple, think i'm going to hibernate this wk, as I've got exams this and next wk. Oh my goodness, can't believe it, i'm just THREE wks into sch, and EVERYTHING is graded and now, exams are up! -.-'' I promised to study hard, so I'll definitely do my best. But frankly, I'm not very confident of doing well as i'm pretty unsure of 2 out of the 3 exams i'm going to take. That's like almost gone case man.. And one of them is MATH! *FAINTS* Seriously don't understand and don't know how to answer their questions..

Here's an example I'll NOT forget! Er, you can skip this part if you hate Math, as i'm going to use some technical terms.

The answer was simply a one-liner: The vector eqn resembles that of a Pythagoras Theorem in 2dimension, therefore it's called the Pythagoras Theorem. -.-'' And it's a mega F-I-V-E, FIVE marks for that ONE-sentence!! It's like so linguistic here. Being used to Singapore's mathematical math, i took painstaking effort to prove that statement mathematically, only to realise that it's NOT the ans they want! :( But my tutor was good. She gave me the FULL credit for making the effort of coming out with the proof. :)

Okie, gtg, bye! Will be back real soon, I hope! :)

=)

"When the going gets tough, the tough gets going. The journey is always not smooth sailing or a bed of roses. Never give up, you only move on and fight another day."

-- My dear Godfather :)

This may be the most corny quote that you've heard or read a thousand times. But, I still appreciate it!! *Happy and optimistic once again!* =)

Confidence booster

This shall be a ego-boosting post as my ego went into a critical level when i seriously don't understand a single thing abt my darling physics! Soo many formulae and soo many different forms of interference, diffraction, etc etc. that it used up my brain energy.. Sorry, my dear poor brain, i didn't mean to torture you so badly. So, i intend to give my brain a reward for working so hard by blogging a post! :)

I simply love my blog! coz it's a gateway for me to keep in contact with my lovely friends in Singapore. It's like a congregation of pple from my different groups of friends! haha, and it's amusing and pleasant to see people from my different social groups "gang up" and arrow me! =) Maybe after 3 years, there'll be this intra-friends network here! wahaha!!

I simply love yest night, i.e. friday over here, sat mrng in Singapore. I spent a gd 3-4 hours catching up with all my friends! It's really fun and exciting! I used the webcamera, skype, MSN, email, facebook, blog, and handphone!! (Woah, so many!!) :)) It's busy, but I simply love it to bits! Soo heart-warming and happy to talk to everybody again!

OK, time to hit the books again, bye pple! It's been sooo long since i mugged on a SATURDAY!!

randomness..

Hello pple, i'm back! Pls appreciate the fact that i didn't go for a party so that i can be here to catch up with all of u! :)haha!!

Life is still pretty much the same, just that feeling a little less stressful as I've finally gotten all my books and have my timetable settled! A slight improvement for friday's schedule, managed to shift the last block to another day, but still ZERO breaks from 8am to 3pm. But survived pretty well on biscuits and granola bars today. But i wld have to say that there's a sense of satisfaction after every friday's lesson, knowing that i've maximised my time to the MAX! And today, still have the energy to go for a run and played frisbee for awhile. Afterwhich, it's not unexpected that I'm quite drained of energy!

Surprisingly, I've not attended ANY of the fun things this week. E.g. skydiving, underwater hockey, water skiing, etc etc. I rationalised that there's no point chionging as if there's no tmr. Since i'll be here for 3yrs, i'm sure there'll be another chance. So no point pushing and stressing myself further by adding more activities to my already packed schedule.

FIRST TIME in my life, in my FIRST T-W-O wks of school, do i
1. have to sacrifice some sleep for the sake of homework
2. feel soo stressed over the tonnes of admin stuff and studies
3. experienced such fast-paced lesson going on
4. not play super hard in school(ok, ex. for my 1st few days here)
.
.
the list goes on..

Yes, i agree that it's a transition period and that everything will iron out smoothly soon.
But i kinda don't agree that uni here is more slack. ok, true, i dunno what's going on in Singapore uni, but i feel that the pace here is real fast.

But i also agree that i think i brought this stress upon myself. I know i can't screw up on my studies here. Whenever i think of the freaking amt of money invested on me here, it hit me real hard that i can't give up. If i screw up my studies, i screw up my dad indirectly. So, NO WAY this can happen! But pls don't misunderstand, i'm stressed now not because of this, but that there's an overwhelming number of things to settle.

Then again, my friend made a passing comment that made me think real hard abt it. She said that luckily I don't have a GPA to meet, so i can afford to slack abit more and explore the different places, if not what's the point of coming? Might as well mug in Singapore. SMACK! I need time to think through this. Really. Not that i intend to mug only(er, i also don't think i have such a stamina, given that i'm labelled as "hyperactive"). Not that I intend to explore so much that I hack about my studies. I want to strike a balance. BUT where to draw the line? I seriously need time to think through, real hard, real serious.
*Shall review this topic again next time*

Oh my, there's just tonnes of things I want to tell all of you! But i can't type everything out, facing this non-responding machine. I want to talk like nobody's business again! Maybe i'll become quiet person when i go back next yr. haha!! opps, maybe some of you will be jumping for joy-yeah! Clar is finally quiet, we got PEACE finally! -.-'' heex.. this is my ultimate weapon called "self-shooting" :P

ohoh, someone brightened up my day totally on wed!! :) shall leave you all in suspense! :P

to pple who have blogs, sorry, didn't have time to read this wk. I'll try to catch up! =) Take care, pple! Miss you pple, really loads! =)

thinking post

I'm sooo stressed that typing posts while listening to emo songs seems to be a getaway for me. I've wanted to blog on the major events that happened in my last 2 wks in Singapore. But I was soo busy then that I didn't manage to do it. And now, I'm too overwhelmed by the all the things I have to settle here such that I can't update as well. I'll try to do it by parts, on top of the updates abt me over here.

I've changed my psychology class to a philosophy class- introduction to ethics. Haha, didn't expect myself to do it at all, but got into it somehow. I suppose it's in relation to an issue I've been thinking abt a wk before I left.

Why do some people live with very good moral values?

Firstly, "very good" is very subjective and it's in my point of view that I think through this question. I was inspired by a person whom I had a meal with one day. If you are a religious person(any religion), then it could be due to those teachings that you were taught.

But what about people who are free-thinker? Where exactly do they learn all these from? Perhaps we can pinpoint to social norms or "moral education" in school. But could these factors be so powerful that they nurture a person with "very good moral values"? To be frank, what I learnt in school are not very significant ones that wow me. E.g. Do not litter, help people around you, etc.

It actually sparked off the idea of human nature. Is there a good and a bad seed in each individual naturally? Why do some people can righteously choose not to do the not very correct things, even it' at the expanse of perhaps lower income or slower promotion?

I've got no conclusion now, maybe there isn't suppose to have one. I don't know. Hopefully my course can enlighten me about it.

Haha, i've attended one lecture, and it twisted my brain to and fro to the max! Pray that I'll come out sane after one semester after this course!

heex.. maybe it'll be more interesting to give you all an example. Here goes:
1. If Jason is a fish, it can fly.
2. Jason is a fish.
3. Therefore, Jason can fly.

Nod your head if you think it's LOGICAL. Shake your head if you think it's not.
MY (i.e. CWZT's)conclusion: It's LOGICAL, but not SOUND. (it can seriously differ from yours.)
Why?
- Not all fishes fly, so 1st statement is not sound.
- Jason can be a boy, dog, etc. -we can't prove for sure that Jason is a fish.

haha, okok, that's all for now. I see stars above your head now! :P

*End of fantasy world, back to reality. To be continued...*

Whining session..

hey pple, pls let me whine, and wallow in self-pity here!! but dun worry, i'll be fine after a while.. just need to let off some steam..

I seriously LOVE my friday's classes! They start from 8am, all the way till the wonderful evening of 5pm! That's not all. I only have an awesome 10min to travel to my next class with a spectacular ZERO break!! So, my pretty little bag will be filled with a bunch of crispy or chewy delicious energy bars or biscuits! And I would have a nice workout while munching them!! SOOO ABSOLUTELY GREAT that I don't know what to do about it!

TO ALL FELLOW SINGAPOREANS/ STUDENTS IN SINGAPORE, PLS APPRECIATE THE FOLLOWING:
1. The nice little red dot you are currently living in. You can WALK to classes within minutes, or even the whole sch of yours( more for pri and sec sch.

I was late practically for ALL my classes on mon even though I rode a bicycle!! AWESOME RITE??!!

pls allow me to side track abit.. I happily went for a math tutorial lesson, thinking that there's no hw at all. To my upmost HORROR, almost the whole class did the hw, and even asked the prof how to do qn 24??!! where i didn't even do a SINGLE qn, and NOT even knowing WHERE to know there's hw!! Only got to know from the person beside that we've got to go the math website! COOL right??!! -.-''

2. The CHEAP AND AFFORDABLE textbooks you have in SINGAPORE!!
FACT: The math book i need here costs USD140 which only cost an AWESOME SING$55!!!!
FACT: A book costs USD57 can be bought at an AWESOME USD8 at Amazon!!!!

ok, tt's enough for today. T-W-O, TWO lessons for you today!

I'm not done with whining, but i've got LOADS of things to do!! I've been pampering myself with MEGA desserts EVERYDAY so i get to relief some stress!! haha, dun worry, i'll stop SOON! Let's take it as a reward for playing sports EVERYDAY last wk! :)

ok, gg back to my miserable land. Pls don't feel hurt if i dun reply your emails so quickly. I know that my emails are equally LOVABLE! *blushing* But, pls pardon me as i'm simply too overwhelmed by the amt of things I need to do. Nonetheless, I really really appreciate your emails and TAGS(??!!, haha!!). I'll reply when I've settled down.

Meanwhile, take care and APPRECIATE the things around you! :)

there goes it... :(

Ok, i'm supposed to be mugging now, but i can't help but say this.

I CAN'T GO FOR RSAF OPEN HOUSE!!! :((

i really really wanna go, but i can't!! next time i suppose.. :(

ok, bye pple, this 2wks are driving me crazy, making me pull my hair off!! too drained to blog too much now.. :(

*disappeared into thin air...*

Miss my stories?? =)

There's thousand and one things I want to tell all of you, but i'm more of a verbal person, so can't really relate all my stories here! :( I really miss those times when I can talk non-stop to all of u..

Pple here use Awesome so casually that Awesome doesn't seem to be that awesome afterall. :( I've tried to find other words to use, but nth seem to be able to beat my dear Awesome! Awesome is very special to me and i use it when i really feel that that incident is worth using that word. Perhaps i'm just alittle too sensitive to that word when pple use it so casually, and we don't hear it often in Singapore.For now, i shall still keep it as my special word. =)

Anw, I went for a church service today! :) When I just started to be a pianist in my church (think on my 2nd yr), my "mentor" told me this, " Most of the time we would be too engrossed in our playing that we actually fail to read and find the deeper meaning of the lyrics-sth that's very important as well. In fact, by doing the latter, we might be able to express that song even better."

Being very green at that moment, I was only able to understand it literally. I could feel there's a deeper meaning he's driving at, but I just can't relate to it. So, I kept this lesson at my heart as I believe I would better appreciate it one day. Now, perhaps about 4/5yrs from then, I finally, TRULY, understood and FELT the deeper meaning of this lesson. :)Today's worship truly touched me, and it's a feeling that's really undescribable and beyond words..

Ok, i'm soo gonna mug my life out this sem as my senior told me that the modules i'm gg to take are pretty much killers, or rather abit more xiong! :( so, i'm gg to hibernate soon i suppose, hopefully not so fast yet! Woots, sch is starting TMR!! *faints*

More adventures! =)

Hi all, have been too busy and tired for the past 2days, so didn't manage to update on my posts! ok, here's an update on what i've been doing so far. :)

Before that, shall tell u guys sth.. I had this feeling on weds, like i'm here for a super long time. Positively, it shows that I've start to familarise myself with this new env. Like i know where is where and got to know more pple. But negatively, I miss Singapore- I'M READY TO GO H-O-M-E, HOME! :( Quite unbelievable right, like u wld not have imagined that i actually miss singapore. Though it's fun to know more pple, i'm pretty tired of meeting more and more pple, but no sense of familarity... Oh wells, it's just a process, things will get though.

On the brigher side, things are getting more familiar, and i can actually greet pple i know while walking down the streets! :D THere's parents of xxx, parents of yyy, fellow singaporeans, fellow coursemates and fellow hall mates! GREAT!So, actually the place didn't seem to be the gigantic, humongously BIG afterall! :)

Tuesday
Great, managed to go out with my fellow Singaporeans! haha, think it's not very nice to keep segregating my bunch of friends, but wells, just for now i suppose. So, we went to get ourselves a hp line and i went to open a bank acct. the hp plans are pretty gd, we are on a family plan, so it's cheaper. We have unlimited sms and unlimited calls to pple with the same line! *faints* and since most of us Singaporeans are having the same line, it's practically FREE to call one another. Calls to others operators take up ur limited call limits, which is like 230 per person. Oh man, i'm sure we are not going to use soo much LA.. haha, haven been using my la, leh, lor, for abit of time! :P

Then, went for LASER TAG and ROLLER SKATING! OMGoodness( not God, haha, just in case i get charged for blasphemy) Hey, I'm may be noob at playing computer games but not too bad when it's real life i suppose! :D Laser tag is sth like there are 2 teams in a dark room with many partitions. so it's like u have to shoot ur opponents. Once u got shot, ur light will go off for 5sec, meaning u can't shoot as well. It's like a mini warfare thingey. Real fun and exciting! haha, haven learnt to skate yet, though pple here are so nice that they teach u voluntarily when u don't know how to skate. Give me 3 more sessions and I'll make sure I master it! Wheeee!!! :D


Wednesday
OMGoodness!! I've got lessons EVERYDAY, and 4HOURS MINIMUM A DAY!! :( And on fri aka longest day, i got A MEGA 9 HOURS OF SCHOOL!!! :(( *faints* NONE of my friends, even the singaporeans has such an IMBA timetable like me! :(( AND MY DARLING FRENCH AND WORLD FOOD ECONOMY HAS NO SPACE FOR ME THIS SEM!! :( *SOBZZZ* But i managed to get my intro to psych.. :) not my 1st choice though.. Think it doesn't seem that easy afterall, 3 of my CORE modules are only like worth T-W-o, TWO, credits each. So i gotta take more to fulfill my requirement. And my ELECTIVE, psych, just killed an awesome 4 credits! -.-''

Haha, contrary to the popular belief that i'm not a mugger in Singapore, i think i'll convert into one soon! hey there, don't shake ur head, though i think most of u have done so.. -.-' But seriously, given such a crazy timetable, i don't seem to have time to play! :( Lessons end abt 5, latest, and nights will be used to chiong all the crazy tutorials! So, maybe i'll return to Singapore as a ultimate MUGGER!! wahaha!!

Anws, i'm soooo eager and motivated to mug, esp looking at my AWESOME schedule! haha, dun catch me playing k! :P

okie, gotta go for picnic and sports later! cya! =)

some pics! :D

Day 1 of Adventure

Think you all are gg to scold me to bits upon reading this entry, but hey, i really can't help it!

Unlike my other Singaporean friends who have gotten all the admin stuff done, or are gg in gps, i did all ALONE!! :( I'm like the last to get everything done, and they somehow able to contact one another here. But i simply can't and dunno how to. "loner's corner" hee..

Anw, I waited for this bus for a gd 45min only to realise that i've been directed to the wrong bus stop. -.-'' So, i decided to WALK to the place. It's abt 20-30min walk. Ok, i know you are gg to say i'm crazy for doing such a "dangerous" thing. But pls give me a little credit for finding the place EVENTUALLY! haha.. I managed to get myself a map, and walked and asked for directions to get to all the places i need to go to. so, it's kind of a mini adventure. :) okok, pls dun nag, i'll try to find some company next time. But for today, no, there's NONE.

Anw, glad that I got to familarise myself with the place, and managed to WALK back to my hall again. :) haha, i'm soo gonna get myself a bicycle soon! During my journey, I met loads of people, and interesting stuff too! Got to know people whom i can do bible study with, and people who can help me find a church. ok, i know you are going to ask if they are trustable. Well, we'll see how it goes. Don't worry, my antenna is working very well. :P

And sth queer happened today. Americans seem to be super afraid of the $100 bill. I went Subway for lunch, and i wanted to pay$100 for my $5.45 meal. But the cashier said they only accept $20 and below. -.-'' she asked me to ask around for small change. NOONE IN THE RESTAURANT HAS SMALL CHANGE FOR $100. i faced comments like " oh, how i hope i have small change for that!" and they gave a fear look when i asked them. I think they are all scared that it's a fake note. anw, someone suggested that i go to the bank to ask for a small change. BUT i have to have a bank acct with them before they do that. -.-' omg, issit soo hard just to pay for a lunch??!! :( Fortunately, i explained my situation to them, and they decided to be nice and change the bill for me. :) So, i got my lunch eventually! :)

I like the culture here, as it's really flexible, and people do not stick to books alone. They have wad i call "ren2 qing2 wei4" There are things which i can/cannot do, but because i being a newbie here, they've relented and even helped me settle things. They think on the spot for a different solution and procedure. WELL DONE! =)

Ok, onto more exciting things!! My newly renovated dining hall is simply SPLENDID!! I didn't get the chance to take photos today, shall do it next time!. with such food, i'll really gain tonnes of weight!! ther's diff cuisines, wide range of desserts, which are humongous in size, eg NYDC-sized cakes! Mouth-watering indeed! Oh this sounds quite emoing, but while i had dinner with my residence hall pple, the whole gp of singapore students actually had it together. really dunno how they managed to meet up, but i've got almost no access to them, other than accidental meets along the way. but no worries, i dun feel real sad abt it, coz on the positive side, i got to noe more pple, as i'm sure i'll be quite clique-ish with them . Anw, shall catch up with them soon! =)

Next, I went to also a newly built recreation centre. It's really really great!! New place to hang out! I did rock climbing and bball today! EVERYTHING IS FREE AND OF COURSE, BRAND NEW! =) it's very professional, even had shoes for rock-climbing. There's also personal trainers for gym sessions, or courses like yoga and pilate and even instructional cooking! Woohoo!! :D

Oh, i also went to the Walmart to get personal things like bed sheets, comforter, lamp, etc. The things are pretty cheap, esp those on offers! i got my darling pillow only for 2.50usd! muahaha!

okie, getting to know more and more friends! GREAT! =)

Awesome Blessings! :D

On my way here, I've experienced a whole loads of awesome blessings! They've been great help for me to reach my hall safely and made my travelling less lonely. =)

1. Met a friend whose going to the same school while having a stopover in Hong Kong. Appreciated her dad's gesture of trying to change my plane seat so that I can seat with them, though it didn't happen due to the fully booked flight. Nonetheless, they've made the 1hr wait seem really short. =)

2. Had a super fast clearance at the chicago airport, got out with my luggage only 40min after my plane touched down. Heard that there's a tight security over there, gotta take off shoes, jackets, etc. at the screening pt. i didn't EVEN see the screening point!! :O The immigration officer just chop chop chop, do fingerprinting, then i can go collect the baggage alr! As i was expecting for some clearance, I tried to find some security screening pts. silly of me right?! :P anw, there's NONE! I even thought that i've missed some procedures when i got out sooo quickly!!

I was also expecting huge problems finding my bus, and having to walk a great distance. but, NO! Just walk out of the airport, and tata, the bus bay is there! GREAT!! And i still have half an hour before the bus comes. I had wanted to shift it to a later time initially.

3. Once, again, my face seems to be portraying that I'm a Singaporean or a UIUC student. There's this couple who asked me straight if I'm going there, and asked where to take the bus. And the best part is, they are the parents of my friend who's studying here too!!! *faints*

4. At the same waiting area, got to know a girl whose having an exchange trip to my school as well. haha, ok, I know i should stop talking to strangers. BUT, kind of just can't help it especially when she asked for directions. haha, not that I'm very familiar with the place la, but ayways, it's the same school. and even engineering too!! :D

5. The bus driver was very charismatic and helpful, making sure that we get to the place we wanted. =) So, i managed to reach my school safely! =)

6. The seniors here are really friendly and helpful. They've helped me check in and even brought my super heavy luggage to my room! I've got loads of help from people who are leaving at the same floor as me, and it really feels pretty cosy and homely. GREAT!! :D

7. A hwa chong netballer is just 2 rooms away from me!! haha, met in the toilet, and hey, u look familiar! and tata, we are both doing engineering! she's the FIRST gal i know doing engineering here! The rest are into other faculties. =)

8. Glad that I've brought some biscuits and stuff in my bag, and oh, the 2 SINGAPORE bread which my friend, R, gave me in the airport! haha! didn't have dinner, and also dunno where to get, so thanks to all these food that i survived the night!

9. Managed to get the internet connection up, and feels great to be able to chat with friends online! haha, just kept forgetting our day and night diff. Nonetheless, it's good to catch up with all of you! =)

10. Jet lag effect has yet to kick in! I managed to sleep very well last night, just that it's abit cold, and i've got no blanket! Anw, gotta survive the next few nights this way, before i get my hands onto my comforter and bed sheets and pillow! =) Hopefully i won't feel sleepy later during my orientation!

So, here's it! it's 10/10!! =) okie, gotta prepare my stuff for a long program today and loads of things to settle. Shall update soon! Meanwhile, take care everybody! :D

on the plane to US! =)

I’ve spent 90% of my time onboard sleeping, haha, all thanks to the hard core play and minimal sleep for the past three days. I would say it’s the first time I slept so little for 3days, and yet still have the energy to continue the packed-with- activities days. I seriously didn’t feel tired. Until I sat on the plane, and supreme lethargy kicks in. Here’s the shocking news: I didn’t seem to have realized that the plane has taken off, for both in Singapore and Hong Kong! The last thing I can remember for both instances was that the plane was accelerating. Haha, for the flight to HK, I suddenly woke and was shocked when I thought that the plane has not taken off when my watch read 7.30am!! -.-’ It’s either the pilot has superb taking off skills or it’s just that I’ve fallen into a deep sound sleep. :P

Hey, but don’t think that I didn’t read all the sweet letters you people have written! I read them while waiting for the plane to take off! Yep, it’s all those emo stuff, but don’t worry, I LIKE THEM!! :D I was really really impressed with 47’s sketch book. How on earth did all of you manage to do that??!! Everyone is pretty scattered around Singapore, the girls in either uni and different courses, the guys in NS. Please please please enlighten me on how you all get almost the whole class to write in the book??!! It’s truly a great surprise, something beyond what I would have imagined! Haha, you people have become mastered the skill of throwing unexpected surprises! Still, I LOVE IT TO BITS! =)

The day truly did start with many surprises as well! I sincerely appreciate all of you for taking the effort to wake up so early/ stayed in the airport through the night just to send me off. And also for all the cards and presents. No amount of words and thanks can simply show how thankful I am for all these touching gestures you people have done.

Okie, enough of such emo things! ARHH!! I’m so gonna miss the table tennis girls’ final! L It’s stating soon! And I feel so helpless sitting at my seat and being unable to watch the match, something which I believe many Singaporeans are doing now! I want to be part of the audience in Singapore! I shall give the team my mental power! J I’ll be soo proud of you girls regardless of the result! JIA YOU! =)

$ not enough?! TIME not enough!!

There's soo many things i wanna share, but I simply can't find the time to type everything out. I'm busy like a bumblebee, everyday is filled with activities and things to settle. Each gathering I went to made me emo at least a little. Tonight's dinner touched me greatly. It made me more emo. Never did I expect the emotional attachment would be soo great. I know i should stop emo-ing, coz the intensity will only get greater as I'm closer to my date of departure. Especially there's more gatherings to go for. ok, S-T-O-P, STOP. I need to settle zillions of things before i leave. Time is seriously running out. 4 more days to blast off... :(): mixed feelings..

My love language

All along in my life thusfar, I've always thought that my love language was acts of service. But the fabulous present R&S gave me last mth (the day some of us went back to AND), has actually made me realise that perhaps I've some misonception about myself. The present was a collection of photos during our AND days and those funny and ridiculous things we've done together! It certainly brought back fond memories and haha, I would declare that queuing up for B&J ice-cream was the CRAZIEST thing I' ve done! Had it been without them, I would definitely not do it! =D

Anyway, on that day. i realised that my love language could have been quality time and/or words of affirmation instead. I was thinking to myself that I should have guessed it earlier, given that I like to re-read letters/cards, look through old photos, write/email/talk to loads of people, etc. That's showing something right? But i seemed to be so blinded to myself. What i've experienced the whole of last wk have gave me the confirmation to this new conclusion. I've enjoyed myself tremendously because I spent quality time with everybody, be it in person or online.

12 more days, and i'll be gone! :(( I never thought that leaving would be so difficult for me- I'm not that gung-ho afterall..

HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY!! =D (Part 2)

Hello, so here's the 2nd part of this happening wk! =)

1. Boss was super nice in letting me off this sat(2/8), despite a shortage of female manpwer and me willing to work! Haha, think he decided to let me enjoy my evening "party". So, I'm soo gonna forsake the chance to watch NDP as an live audience and work on that day even more! =) Time to do something for my beloved Singapore!

2. On Thurs, I went down to NUS to get my new laptop, thanks to my benefactor, S! Hee, actually I quite like the school. It's comfortable to be there, except for the blazing sun, and it's easy to mingle with the people there! =) Gives me quite a homely feeling.. Haha, fortunately, or unfortunately, I didn't go for those orientation or like crash their events, if not, bet i'll be super attached to it la! *smiles sheepishly*

3. I had an awesome time with UIUC people on fri! haha, got to know this senior who's taking the same course as me, and all have to admit that IE is one of the slackest in the college! The professors don't bother to set new exam questions, so more or less they are the same. Notes are all prepared for us, so we need not bring anything to lesson, unless u wanna play games on ur laptop, or you intend to be more studious and bring ONE pen! :P The most ultimate and great thing is that I gain credits even if I go skydiving, ice-skating, bowling, etc., and can easily get an 'A' for such activities! Woohoo!! Exchange programs can also gain you credits, and you just have to write an 1500words essay about it. So, perhaps it's true that I'll spend less than 5 hours studying a wk! =)

Nonetheless, I'm not going to play like crazy, I hope! :P You guys gotta keep an eye on me k! Haha, can drop me emails or tag to keep track of me. If I don't reply like within 1 week, think I would need a leash! :P So since it sounds quite easy-going there, I'm aiming to max out my GPA for my 1st year. Hence, I'll declare that I, CW, shall get GPA 4.0 for the next 2 semesters! =)

4. I had this mega party on sat, which was simply awesome and had a splendid time catching up with many people! =) Totally didn't expect any gifts, and was kind of touched with all the very thoughtful gifts! haha, no worries, didn't really emo (YET). :P I really appreciated boss's gesture of giving me the day off, coz it's complete madness today! Everything was pretty last minute, bought most of the groceries only like 3 or 4 hours before the dinner. Was really thankful for all the help given, ranging from getting the groceries with me, helping me direct other people to my place, cooking, to cleaning! What made me so willing to have a gathering at my place despite having to prepare much for it was precisely this bunch of people who are appreciative and willing to help in any way they can. My life would be so much more mundane without you guys! Thanks so much for being in my life! =)

5. I had a talk with my dad after the gathering. In these 3 wks especially, I've actually grown to be more impressed and touched with his gestures. Though I may not agree with his demanding and dominant approach of doing things, I can't but agree that he's very effective in getting things done. Once again, I was truly touched by his love and care, though he may be indifferent towards us since young. Perhaps he just doesn't express it out. I'm actually quite comfortable in allowing him to plan for my life over the next few years. =) The conversation with him actually made me feel like jumping into my books and lectures right away and mug my life out. It made me more determined to get a 4.0 GPA. It made me love and appreciate my life more. It made me want to get a good-paying job and support him when he's old. It made me more motivated to get into my college's scholar's program so that most of my courses would be sponsored for.

Yeah, it's really a big change in my emotion. There are too many thoughts and intense feelings which I can't put into words. This year could very well be a turning point in my life. I don't seem to have experienced so much in any part of my life so far, and it's only like 7mths into this yr!

HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY!! =D (Part 1)

There are too many happy and fun things going on for the past few days-and also for the next few days- that I can't contain my excitement all the way till this weekend and blog everything at one shot. Hence, I decided to break them into 2 parts, so that I won't die of an overdose of happiness and laughter!! =))

1. Had an awesome time with R and S on friday, EXCLUDING the part which S loves announcing to the whole world( I got lost in Suntec??!!). :p We went for the Singapore Garden Festival, and took several spastic shots! haha, ok, i admit that it's me most of the time! =) The designs and flowers were really wonderful, and I just realised on Sunday that my uncle's company actually got a GOLD and SILVER award for 2 of their masterpieces! So ZAI!! =D Afterwhich, we went Crab Shack and Cheely Chocolate along Upper Thomson Rd. Both are a must-try!! It's great food, great ambience, great company!! =DD

2. Played with my favourite kid on sunday when his mum gave some of us a lift home!! =) Haven been playing with him for a very long time, maybe since 1st wk of june? :( Coz I've been away for most of that mth, and not much time for him due to packed sundays in july. Hee, except one sunday which I pampered him with yakult, meiji panda choc biscuits and his favourite chocolate! :) Anw, I coaxed him with this cheese wang wang biscuit that he simply loves it to bits!

It's really heartening to know how much he has grown, though it's just like 2mths! I first saw this boy when he was just an infant, then he starts to learn how to crawl, to walk on his own and to start babbling. Afterwhich, he's able to repeat the words we say (with/without understanding), and to now, understanding my questions and knowing how to speak in almost complete sentences!! =)) He's super super cute when he tried to explain to me on his swimming experiece. He went like "pata pata pata" and showing me the strokes simultaneously!! *FAINTS ON HIS CUTENESS*

3. Had a bbq dinner with family, as my uncle and wife came back from Australia. Being a great chef, my uncle introduced us some korean bbq cuisine. And the mussels that my the other uncle brought was really fresh and mouth-watering! Again, it's great food, great ambience, great company!! =DD My uncle was like throwing me situations which I may face in the U.S., and testing me on my reaction to them. E.g. What will you do if someone asked you for some small change on the street? It's really nice to learn some overseas stuff from him, and catch up with everyone too.

4. Went out with the girls' club on mon, Dark Knight was a nice movie! Though most of the time the sound effects were blasting off my poor little ears, and some gruesome parts. Don't know if it's just me or what, it actually left me quite emo-ish after that, just ike Ironman. It's either the movies I watched tend to be emo-ish, or that I've seriously became more emo this yr! :S Thoughts that came through were like GP topics: Human nature- good or bad?, Power of social influences, Pros and cons of science and technology, etc..

Enough of such emo stuff I suppose.. We went Dome cafe for dinner to catch up with one another more. Once again, Great food, great ambience, great company!! =)

5. After a day of outing, I went home, only to be pleasantly surprised upon reading an email!! I've been awared the Illini Alumni Scholarship (Singapore)! =DD Though not that it's alot of money, but I'm simply and really thankful for it. It has motivated me to really study harder when I'm there!! Thank you sooo much!! =)

6. On tues, went back to see bosses and had lunch with one of them, P. =) Of all, I find him the most trustworthy one, perhaps because I have the impression that the main reason he worked is to support his family, not because he's going after wealth and status. A very family-oriented, gentle and respectable person. Don't know who to trust in the office? Just go find him. =D Had fun listening to his durian and cycling stories!

The visit was meant to be half a day affair, but unexpectedly, I was there for a whole day, all the way until the other 2 bosses, M and B, were knocked off, and we went dinner together! Spent the earlier half talking to my idol-M! =) A very intellectual and respectable guy, who has loads of stories and real-life things to tell. Almost a walking encyclopedia! I was amazed with his memory space, being able to recall things like Boyle's law( omg, didn't i just learnt it in JC??!!), whatever history stuff which I have zero recollection of, etc. And he's like 50 this yr??!! :o

The other half was spent with B, once again, learnt many things. The session has evoked several thoughts in me, need some time to think through all of them.. :S

haha, ok, here I am to recommend another place for good food! It's at toa payoh, didn't take note which block, but we entered the blk80-84 carpark. The place is Codfish Village, opened by this ex-TCS actor, who is apparently not in our era one. haha! Great food man!!

This wk is soo gonna be super happening!! 4 days more before this wk ends! Hopefully my heart can still take it!! =))

God said "NO!!"

This post will touch on my religion, so pls read only of you are comfortable with it. =)

Clarissa: Hey God, how now brown cow? Yes or no? I really hope You'll give a YES as it's been my dream for about 3 years!

God: N-O, NO!

Clarissa: WHY??!! Is it not right to want to do something for my country and why don't You grant me my wish of going overseas?

God: - silence-

So that's it, God decided not to give me a government scholarship, a wound that has yet to heal till now. The wound tears again and again when anyone asks me about my undergraduate studies. It's liken to the wound I had on my knee last year. The wound simply tears when i jump or run(during trainings), hence it took very long to heal. And tearing open a recovering wound is just as, if not more painful than first having it. It's been about 3 mths, but i still feel the pain. I feel that God is playing a joke on me.

Firstly, He gave me a set of fabulous results which I've never ever dreamt of getting. Secondly, I got into 2 out of 3 U.S. universities that I've applied. Thirdly, things were going well seemingly as I got into 2nd round of the interviews. Then things started to turn ugly. I started to think more about my major, as my interviewers gave some feedback on it. In about 1-2 mths, the final verdict is out. My world collapsed. I'm torn between local and overseas education. I emo-ed for almost 2 mths. It's also the amt of time I took before making the decision. Travelling for almost 1mth was useful, coz i got to escape from reality for some time. I didn't think abt it as I was playing so hard, and simply fell into a sound sleep after a day of activities. I woke up the next day, and started playing again. I hardly spoke a word when I was home. I simply unpacked, repacked, then off I am to another country. =)

I would be lying if I were to say that my wound has healed. But nonetheless, I believe that there's something for me to learn from this, as well as that there's something better waiting for me! It would be quite a painful wait till then, which I may only realise years later, but I'm sure I would see the greatness behind this whole plan eventually.

Clarissa: Ok, I shall wait patiently.

Once a Singaporean, always a Singaporean! =)

Ok, now on a happier post! I went to watch the NDP preview on 19/7 ( Sat) with W. As we didn't have the tickets, we went just beside the floating platform. Thankfully, the rain stopped just as the preview was about to start, and it didn't rain throughout the performances and march past. =)) I love this year's NDP as it catches us with loads of surprises, like sudden bursts of mini sparks and fireworks at the unexpected times, e.g. after a section of performance. I was busy looking left and right to capture these surprises that spring out from different places! :D I think the light and water effects were really good and the organisers have really made very good use of the resources the location has to offer. Of course, I loved the 2 mega blasts of fireworks at the end! It was simply AWESOME!! This was despite the heavy rain that came along with them. =) It was just so Singaporeans to stay and wait for the fireworks to commence! Nonetheless, old-fashioned it may sound but I'M PROUD TO BE A SINGAPOREAN AND I LOVE SINGAPORE!! :DD

To the organisers of NDP 2008: Thanks thanks so much for such a wonderful celebration! And the pre- and post- activities as well! Everything is SPLENDID!! =) ( Though I'm not able to attend all, especially the fireworks in late aug.. ]: )

Thanks so much for such an EMERGENCY dept!!

There seems to be so much to write about that I'm not sure where to start from.. Think I'll start with today, since it's the freshest in my mind.

In the late morning, I went back to my room after breakfast, closed my door and listened to a new CD by my favourite new-age composer, while I read a book that I've just borrowed.
Just as I was lazing on my bed, I heard my mum sreaming frantically for me, that my maid has fainted.

Thankful point no.1: The CD ended and tired from reading, I lazed on my bed. Had I been engrossed in both the music and the book, I would not have heard her, especially with my door closed.

When I went down, I saw the situation and told my mum that we need to send my maid to the hospital, as she was having breathing difficulties and chest pains. My worst thought was a heart attack. Anw, there's a little conflict between my mum and I then-ya, very unexpected right.. Perhaps it was my very cold look,and my quick and decisive reaction, " Let's go, we need to send her to the hospital." Maybe I’m supposed to be just as panicky and be lost in what to do. :S Ironically, the book that I just read was about the differences on how men and women are hard-wired. As stated, women tend to be more emotional- a well-known fact. Maybe I should be more worried about my composed reaction.. :P Anyway, I shall elaborate not elaborate too much on the conflict. =)

Thankful point no. 2: I’ve just completed my first aid course, and unexpectedly, I can apply what I’ve learnt so soon! At least I know it’s a situation that requires medical help right away, and the position to let her breathe better. Actually, I’ve also went through mentally the steps of CPR if I really need to do it. Thankfully, the condition didn’t worsen to the state which CPR is required.

Thankful point no. 3: The hospital is not very far from my house, about 15min drive, despite the wet weather and a rather heavy traffic.

I would say I had a horrible experience at the hospital. It made me wonder if the staffs are there to save living or dead people!
Key point: I was at the EMERGENCY department.
Fact: A doctor attended to my maid only 2HOURS++ upon admission!! =O

Straight after we reached the A&E department, I was initially glad that a nurse offered a wheelchair and directed me to the place to go. Perhaps seeing that my maid was a more serious case, another nurse brought her straight into the room and transferred her to a bed to monitor her blood pressure, etc. After I’m done with the registration, I went into the big room to find my maid. Before I found her, 2 supposed nurses, most probably trainees, looking at the screen that showed the blood pressure and other details. (As in I saw them but couldn’t see my maid as she was lying down.) When I finally found her, I looked at the screen and spent about a minute figuring out all the details. When I’m done, the 2 guys were still staring at the machine, not doing anything or rather not knowing what to do!! And there was my maid breathing with difficulty and suffering from chest pains- helpless! I looked straight into their eyes and expected them to do something. Perhaps I’ve scared them that they asked me to wait outside.

After waiting like an idiot an hour, I asked a nurse if my maid was fine. She said I actually can go in. -_-’ So the guys gave the wrong information. Never mind, it’s ok. But to my horror, the doctor has not attended to her yet!! She said she was busy with other patients, so not her turn yet. *Shakes head, almost fainted* Luckily, my maid’s breathing is normal now.

Getting very bored already, I went out to look for my mum, and had lunch with her and a pastor. We had about ONE hour lunch. I went back and my maid was NOT done yet! *Puking blood soon* Anyway, I went in together with my maid as I wanted to know the medical review. Doctor’s verdict: Gastric pain, in fact, he was not clear in what exactly happened. He didn’t answer my question on causes of her chest pains, breathing difficulties, etc.

Prescription: Medicine for gastric, for giddy, and the best part- Paracetamol(500mg)

Yes, I’m not a doctor, but from my observations on the situation and the readings on the machine, my maid has high blood pressure at the very least. So, why is there no prescription of drugs for that or at the very least, voice out so that we can monitor her diet and lifestyle??!! I seriously don’t understand a lot of things going on there!

Perhaps I should apologize for the questions I posed to the nurses and doctors, and for being such a difficult “patient” to deal with. :S

Thankful point no. 4: Not a very serious case, if not, given such a delayed medical attention, I’m prepared for the worst.

Fruitful week :D

I attended a 3day first aid course this week and I’m a TRAINED first-aider now! =) It’s something I’ve wanted to learn since secondary school, but didn’t get a good chance for it, so I’m really satisfied and glad that I’ve fulfilled this goal of mine, especially it’s very rare for me to hang on to one for so long. Most of the time, my interest will die off soon if I don’t carry out the plan or activity in about a month’s time. I want. I suppose it’s because I can’t bear the sight of seeing someone dying/injured, and myself being unable to do anything. If spending 3days of my time can make a difference, especially between a life and death one, I think it’s absolutely worth it! =)

During the course, I got to know more people from all walks of life, from students to parents to professionals. I was impressed with those wives who came for the sake of their husbands and children. It’s the extra mile they are willing to go to protect their loved ones. How noble of them! =) I was also encouraged by their willingness to learn, when they could have easily lead a “tai tai” life.

Now, let me move on to a more reflective topic. On Monday night, I had a short session with a group of adults from my uni’s alumni. Generally, it was a very insightful and fruitful session that I’ve made some changes to my life plan. I was impressed with the very broad perspectives they hold as well as the valuable advice they gave. They made me realize that I need to keep pushing my boundaries, and don’t let myself be restricted to Singapore or what I know only. That’s why I need to continue to learn and keep myself updated with the changes and upcoming fields in the world. I’ve decided to take up their advice on taking my MBA after a few years of working experience, as this will make me appreciate what I learn better. So, below is my new life plan.

2008-2011 (3yrs): Graduate with Industrial Engineering, and if possible, a double degree with Business Ad.

2011- (2013?): Work in an aviation/aerospace firm, ideally, Boeing, Rolls Royce or Lockheed Martin.

(2013- 2014/5): MBA, probably after 1 or 2yrs of work. Will see how things go then.

2014/5 onwards: Continue in same/ different firm. Hopefully, I can be based here for the Singapore Aerospace Hub that should be more or less ready. Hee, time to settle down after a few more years! =P

So, this is the ideal plan for the next few years. Of course, it’ll be changed accordingly as I grow older. Ok, shall blog so much for now. Need some time to think through more things. Ciao =)

Emo Post

Today, I had the chance to have a short chat with a friend, H. It left me emo-ing, thinking through many points after that. H is taking up a scholarship to study in the UK. Under this board, she has to study to, from my personal point of view, an incredibly high qualification that I would not dream myself of getting. The current one was not her top choice, and that she would not have taken it up had she had another choice. This was partly because she' s not very keen about her future job scope, and partly because she didn' t really expect herself to do up to that high a qualfication as well. Though her parents were willing to pay for her overseas education (which may not be very comfortably, i.e. not like it' s an extra cash to them), she decided to take up the scholarship because she didn' t want her parents to pay for such an exorbitant education; especially it' s in the UK. Perhaps being able to finish qulifation in what i deem was short number of years was a comforting point. I don' t know- I just know that it made me emo at my seat for the whole ceremony that I was attending then.

She has made me see that perhaps I didn' t want to go overseas as bad as she do, or rather perhaps I' ve always thought I would definitely go overseas, it' s just a matter of who' s paying for it; though I've never expected my dad to be so willing to support me then. In the years to come, she is going to sacrifice 6 years of her time, doing something that she' s not very into it, but willingly as doing so will allow her to get an almost free overseas education. She is depending entirely on her own to earn that overseas education. I salute her for her courage, optimism and persistence in working towards her goal.

I've always claimed that I want to go overseas to study, and that I don't want to tax my dad o much. But frankly, how much have I done to alleviate this exorbitant burden? Had I been too picky when it comes to choosing a scholarship, because I did consider whether I like the future job scope then. Should I not be so persistant on the major I want? Afterall, it's so new here that nobody knows what on earth it is. Have I been wrong in my judgement? Maybe I'm not as clear as what I want in the future as I thought I am. Maybe I'm not that mature afterall. Maybe I'm still a very naive and innocent little girl, who assumes she knows what's good and what's not. I'm very unsure now, if this current decision is a wrong one, it is certainly too high a price to pay. So high that I see myself emo-ing in the decade to come.

And for once, I am truly touched by my dad's actions. He's afterall the only one who didn't waver in the decision of supporting me overseas. He tried to give me the sense of security when I was so troubled over to stay or to go. He didn't want me to give up this dream of mine just because of financial worries. I suppose the best thing o give him at the end of the year is an outstanding and excellent report card- nothing less...

Birth of lovable-clar! =P

Hi people, this blog was set up to keep all of you updated on my life while I’m in the United States. Just for your information, I’ll be going to University of Illinois, Urbana-Champaign (UIUC) to do Industrial Engineering. Haha, this blog was successfully born with the help of Simone and Rachel in helping me with my blog name!! =P And of course, simone for her laptop. The good point made was that the address would be what people have to type to view my site, so this BEST and ULTIMATE name was used- LOVABLE CLAR!! =))

Haha, as most of you would know, I’m those kinds of people who really and seriously need loads of human interaction to survive! Ok, except for times when I’m emo-ing or terribly stressed and busy. Hence, I would certainly not hope my local social circle to shrink exponentially over these few years. So please feel free to tag, or if you have super long stuff to tell me, you can drop me an email! I will be very glad to hear from you! =)

Ok, think this would be all for a brief introduction on my blog. Cya around here! =)