An Ode to Blackie

Nano Nano what happened to thee
Only days ago you made me so happy
You were my first iPod, don’t you see
I even had a name for you, it was “Blackie”


Out of the box, you were so shiny
So small, so thin, so incredibly tiny
It’s a wonder you’re 4 Gigabytes in total capacity
You made me feel so very very lucky


Supports all audio formats to a certain degree
Apple Loseless, AIFF, WAV and AAC
Not forgetting good old MP3
Ample choice in sound quality


I didn’t throw you out into the sea
Nor did I drop you in my cup of tea
Your screen just went blank, so suddenly
That made me feel so melancholy


It’s been three days now Blackie, how I miss thee
So delicate and fragile, I didn’t foresee
Good thing you’re still under warranty
I look forward to the day when I can again shout, "Yippee!”









_______________________________________________
Read more obituaries sad stories of the iPod Nano here.

NANOO NANOOOOoooooo..................

R.I.P.
iPod "Blackie" Nano
19th - 23rd September 2005








*sob* *sob*

Awan Yang Terpilu

kerana cinta
aku kembara
bagai camar
melintas laut
mencari pohon
untuk berteduh

kerana cinta
aku kembara
ikut lagu
bisikan hati
mendamba kasih
paling setia

korus:
sepasang sayap tak terlihat
umpama mimpi yang tersimpan
jadi rintik-rintik hujan
menciptakan
awan yang terpilu

puisi ini
tercipta lantas
tak kesampaian
hajat meronakan
gelora rindu
ku kepadamu

ulang korus

bridge:
ingin sekali
aku ungkapi
isyarat jiwa
dengan sempurna
biarkan kau mengerti
biarkan kau sedari
keadaanku yang memujamu

ulang korus



Artis : NING BAIZURA
Album : Erti Pertemuan
Lagu : Awan Yang Terpilu
Lirik: Loloq (Luncai Emas Sdn. Bhd)

Lost Clogged In Space

I recall spending the various holiday seasons at my grandparents’ place in my early childhood. Basic plumbing still hasn’t reached the area and the only toilet we had was a short two-minute walk towards the back of the house. Before you start making wild assumptions, no, we didn’t go in the bushes; we were much more civilised than that, thank you very much. We had a smaller house to do our businesses.

If you had rapid bowel movements in the middle of the night, you would have to arm yourself with a bucket of water and a torchlight; there was no other source of artificial light available.

Have you ever wondered how astronauts take a dump in space? I mean, how do you actually defecate in zero gravity?

Just think for a second, you push.. out it comes.. and you feel delighted. Then what? Without the help of gravity, where is your poopie going? Yes! It’s going to float! And you’re definitely going to do MORE than just wipe your ass that time!

So what if NASA actually developed a special lavatory that sucks in your waste as they come out.

Hmmm... the word “haemorrhoid” comes to mind.

Ouch/Eww.

Come to think of it, how do martians or aliens take a dump. How do they cope with waste disposal in space?

Have you ever wandered into a toilet cubicle by accident and found a black slimy extra-terrestrial doing its business? Actually, if that ever happpened, you would probably be host to its eggs by now.

In any case, such gratifying questions can only be answered if we were to send somebody into space to investigate this dilemma.

But who?

Who would be sick brave enough to endure all the tests and experiments on a subject of this calibre?

Why me of course!

"How?", I hear you ask.

Just vote for me here.

Remember, all submissions are logged and you can only vote once (yeah I tried to vote myself twice and it wouldn’t let me.. boo!) so make sure you click on me before hitting the submit button.

Come on, it’s for a good cause (and a bit of fun).

To show my support, should I turn out to be the winner, I will double the organiser's donation i.e. if the donation sums up to £10, I will add another £10 to make it £20 and so on.

Voting ends at 23:59 25th September 2005 GMT.

So get clicking and AFUNDI Astronaut iJun now!

Don't Cha Like This One Better?

Ha, ha-ha, ha-ha
Ha, ha-ha, ha
Ha-ha, ha-ha, ha-ha
Ha, ha-ha, ha


[Will.I.Am]
It's funny how a man only thinks about the *BEEP*
You got a real big heart, but I'm looking your *BEEP*
You got real big brains, but I'm looking at your *BEEP*
Girl, there ain't no pain in me looking at your *BEEP*


[PCD]
I don't give a *BEEP*
Keep looking at my *BEEP*
'Cause it don't mean a thing if you're looking at my *BEEP*
Ha, I'm a do my thing while you're playing with your *BEEP*
Ha, ha-ha, ha-ha, ha-ha


Every boy's the same
Since I been in seventh grade
They been trying to get with me
Trying to (Ha, ha-ha, ha, ha-ha)
They always got a plan
To be my one and only man
Want to hold me with their hands
Want to (Ha, ha-ha, ha, ha-ha)
I keep turning them down
But, they always come around
Asking me to go around
That's not the way it's going down


'Cause they only want
Only want my ha, ha-ha
Ha, ha-ha
Only want what they want
But, na, ah-ah
Na, ah-ah


[Will.I.Am]
It's funny how a man only thinks about the *BEEP*
You got a real big heart, but I'm looking your *BEEP*
You got real big brains, but I'm looking at your *BEEP*
Girl, there ain't no pain in me looking at your *BEEP*


[PCD]
I don't give a *BEEP*
Keep looking at my *BEEP*
'Cause it don't mean a thing if you're looking at my *BEEP*
Ha, I'm a do my thing while you're playing with your *BEEP*
Ha, ha-ha, ha-ha, ha-ha


You didn't know that no
Don't mean yes, it means no
So just hold up, wait a minute
Let me put my two cents in it
One, just be patient
Don't be rushing
Like you're anxious
And two, you're just too aggresive
Try to get your (Ahh)


Do you know that I know?
And I don't want to go there


Only want
Only want my ha, ha-ha
Ha, ha-ha
Only want what they want
But, na, ah-ah
Na, ah-ah


[Will.I.Am]
It's funny how a man only thinks about the *BEEP*
You got a real big heart, but I'm looking your *BEEP*
You got real big brains, but I'm looking at your *BEEP*
Girl, there ain't no pain in me looking at your *BEEP*


[PCD]
I don't give a *BEEP*
Keep looking at my *BEEP*
'Cause it don't mean a thing if you're looking at my *BEEP*
I'm a do my thing while you're playing with your *BEEP*
Ha, ha-ha, ha-ha, ha-ha


[Will.I.Am]
Boomp-boomp, Omp-omp
Boomp, boomp-boomp
Boomp-boomp, Omp-omp
Boomp, boomp-boomp
[Repeated]


[PCD]
Ooh, you've got it bad I can tell
You want it bad, but oh well
Dude, what you got for me
Is something I
Something I don't need
Oh!


[Will.I.Am]
It's funny how a man only thinks about the *BEEP*
You got a real big heart, but I'm looking your *BEEP*
You got real big brains, but I'm looking at your *BEEP*
Girl, there ain't no pain in me looking at your *BEEP*


[PCD]
I don't give a *BEEP*
Keep looking at my *BEEP*
'Cause it don't mean a thing if you're looking at my *BEEP*
I'm a do my thing while you're playing with your *BEEP*
Ha, ha-ha, ha-ha, ha-ha


[Will.I.Am]
It's funny how a man only thinks about the *BEEP*
You got a real big heart, but I'm looking your *BEEP*
You got real big brains, but I'm looking at your *BEEP*
Girl, there ain't no pain in me looking at your *BEEP*


[PCD]
I don't give a *BEEP*
Keep looking at my *BEEP*
'Cause it don't mean a thing if you're looking at my *BEEP*
I'm a do my thing while you're playing with your *BEEP*
Ha, ha-ha, ha-ha, ha-ha


*BEEP*

______________________________________________________
Artist: Pussycat Dolls (The)
Album: PCD
Year: 2005
Title: Beep (feat. Will.I.Am)

You Tell Him, Jack!

[INT. FBI - CONFERENCE ROOM - NIGHT]
LEGEND: 3:53 AM

(Special Agent John Michael 'Jack' Malone, Head of the Missing Persons Squad unit, re-interviews Rick Knowles, whose twin brother's girlfriend has been missing)


Jack: You don't like women much, do you?

Rick: I like women fine.

Jack: Well, what do you like about them?

Rick: What do YOU like about women?

Jack: I like the way they smell. I like the curve of their back. I like the glint in their eye, the bounce in their step. But most of all, I like the feeling that you get when you look at a woman and you can see the little girl in her.

Rick: Wow... You've really thought about this.

Jack: And that's just off the top of my head. Give me a pad and a pen and fifteen minutes and I'll give you a complete dissertation. Now, what do you like?



Yeah, he took the words right out of my mouth...



___________________________________________
Dialogue taken from Without a Trace

10 Things Thoughts I Hate About You

So something appeared on the Apple UK website today....



First thought: WTF????

Second thought: DAMN!

Third thought: WHEN THE HECK DID THAT COME OUT???

Fourth thought: DAMN!!

Fifth thought: WHAT'S THE STORAGE SIZE???

Sixth thought: DAMN!!!

Seventh thought: HOW MUCH???

Eighth thought: DAMN!!!!

Nineth thought: I WANT ONE!!!

Tenth thought: DAMN!!!!!



I love hate you...



_____________________________________
Personal message to Ayes: " BELI WEI! "

Jamban, Jamban Here and There

Jamban, jamban here and there
Jamban, jamban everywhere
I take pictures, I don’t care
Jamban punters please beware


Jamban, jamban here and there
Jamban, jamban everywhere
Jamban rosak don’t despair
Just hold your breath, don’t gasp for air


Jamban, jamban here and there
Jamban, jamban everywhere
Flush not working, I still can bear
Overflowing jamban, I don’t dare


Jamban, jamban here and there
Jamban, jamban everywhere
Jamban rosak please don’t stare
You might be in for a big scare


Jamban, jamban here and there
Jamban, jamban everywhere
Maybe there’s a business in jamban repair
Who knows, I might become a millionaire


I need some gloves, do you have a pair?






_____________________________________________________
* jamban - privy; toilet; latrine; lavatory cesspool
** rosak - broken; damaged; spoilt