Hari Merdeka
The Petronas Twin Towers in Kuala Lumpur
Today we celebrate the 48th anniversary of our country's independence.
May we all live in peace, with little NO discrimination and segregation, and as happy as we can be.
Happy Merdeka Day to all my Malaysian friends!
I miss home terribly...
My Name Is Yi Chun
“Apa tengok luar tingkap wei?”
(Loosely translated: Why are you looking outside the window?)
“Huh?”, I was reluctantly brought back to reality by James.
“Tengok je...”, was my short and brief reply.
(Just looking...)
James and I were in Syimah’s bedroom. She shares a flat with Belinda and another person whom I failed to remember the name and gender (and who also wasn’t present on that day, so give me a break!).
Anyway, James got to know Syimah over a year ago and she invited us over for some nasi lemak one Saturday afternoon. I remember exactly how James introduced me to Syimah when we arrived at her place five minutes earlier;
“Syimah, this is Ijun. Ijun, meet Syimah.”
“Hi”, I offered a smile and feeling a bit awkward.
I was always unsure if a lady wants a handshake. I usually wait to see if she would offer one first. If she sticks her hand out, I would shake it.
“Hello”, she said. “Please come straight in. I’m still cooking.”
No hand sticking out. Looks like no handshake here.
“Oh ok. Come Ijun”, James was making sure I was well looked after.
James and I were led straight to her bedroom. It would seem that this flat was either missing a living room, or it has simply just been converted into another bedroom.
In any case, there we were, trying to make ourselves comfortable in Syimah’s bedroom. She had gone back to the kitchen. James was having a browse on the bookshelves while I was more intrigued by the bedroom window, for some strange reason.
“Ah, look! Sepet!”, he grabbed an authentic VCD copy (complete with SIRIM's holographic sticker) from the shelf, sounding like a miner who had finally struck gold.
“Come, let’s watch it!”, he continued.
He walked out to the hallway and started to holler,
“Syimah, can we watch your Sepet or not???”
“Go ahead!”, was a very distant yet audible reply from the kitchen across the flat.
James quickly closed the door. My Javanese nostrils were flaring to the scent of sambal tumis as it crept rapidly into Syimah’s bedroom. The walls of my mouth soon filled with fresh manly saliva.
“Ugh. Lapar.”, I thought to myself.
(Ugh. Starving.)
After fumbling exploring through Syima’s DVD player and sound system, we managed to get Sepet on the telly. I have actually seen the film before so this time round is purely for James’ benefit. He was really keen on watching it.
About forty minutes later, it was time to swap to the second VCD. Syimah entered the room,
“So have you guys finished it?”
“Not yet. We’re about to in the second disc.”, James explained.
“Korang tak pernah tengok ke?”, she continued.
(You guys haven’t watched it before?)
"No", said James.
“Dah”, I boastingly replied.
(I have.)
“Best kan?”, Syimah offered her opinion towards the movie.
(Good, isn’t it?)
“Boleh lah.. tapi ada ke family Melayu macam tuh?”
(It’s passable, but is there truly a Malay family like that?)
“Wah pandai you cakap Melayu. Takde telo langsung. All your friends cakap macam ni ke James?”, Syimah expressed her amazement.
(Wow you speak Malay fluently. No accent at all. Do all your friends speak like this James?)
“Eh?”, James had a bewildered look on his face.
So did I, which include my left eyebrow raising itself by two inches.
James turned his head towards me, back at Syimah and back again towards me.
“You’re Chinese aren’t you?”, uncertainty was clouding Syimah’s judgement.
“Errr...”, I turned toward James.
“Errr...”, James looked at me.
“Yes. Yes I am”, I said confidently.
I had no idea why I said that. I could clearly see the white of James' eyes from five feet away as they grew larger.
“Ok I’m heading back to the kitchen. Once you guys have finished the movie, we can eat.”, Syimah went away again.
As the door closed behind her, both James and I broke into the most silent laughter we ever had, complete with our hands slowly slapping against the carpeted floor, like that of a wrestling referee.
TO BE CONTINUED...
Itsy Bitsy My Foot!
“What the f*** was that???”
I yelled whispered loudly and got up on my feet in a flash. It was way past one o’clock in the morning. Anuar and I had just finished watching Hearts in Atlantis on DVD and were discussing the differences between the movie and the novel, when all of a sudden, in the corner of my eye, I saw something dark with eight legs went crawling under the gas-fireplace.
I turned to Anuar, who had a estranged look on his face and said,
“Apa?”
(English translation: What?)
He was at the other side of the coffee table, he couldn’t have seen it.
I gave the fireplace a few taps.. and immediately realised that it was probably a stupid thing to do. Why provoke something that you are scared of in the first place?
“How are you with spiders?”, I turned to Anuar again.
“Not too bad.”
“Really? What about rats or snakes?”, I squatted down on the floor again, with my legs stretched beneath the coffee table.
“Cockroaches.”
He proceeded to tell me what happened when he was child (Yeah, why do these things always happen during childhood?). Anyway, I won’t disclose the story here, but it was bloody funny as hell.
As the both of us were recovering from our laughter, something crawled pass me on my left side with blazing speed and went under the sofa. I swear to God, it must have been less than four inches away from me.
“SHITTTT!!!!!”, I got up on my feet again and jumped to the opposite side of the coffee table.
Anuar had both his feet up on the sofa. I could tell that he wasn’t taking any chances there.
“Did you see it?”, I asked him again.
“Something went under the sofa.”
I went to get my foot-long Maglite and used it to illuminate the area under the sofa.. from a safe distance of five feet away.
Anuar was laughing at my precautionary measure, but I paid no attention to him.
“There’s nothing there, but I was pretty sure it went in there.”
That’s not actually true. I could see some dust-bunnies.. and what seemed like reminiscence of my battle with a packet of Kacang Mengelembu Cap Pagoda a few weeks back, but I thought I better not try and frighten my guest with such findings.
After being absolutely sure there was nothing under the sofa, I proceeded to walk to the kitchen to make a hot drink. Lo and behold.. there it was right next to the stairs.
“Oi tengok ni!”
(Come look at this!)
Anuar came rushing and said,
“Gila besar sial!”
(That’s huge!)
“Apa ko ternak sini wei?”
(What are you breeding here?)
“Quick, grab a picture of it”, I calmly instructed Anuar.
He grabbed his digital camera and took a shot..
*click*
The itsy bitsy spider climbed up the water spout
Down came the rain, and washed the spider out
Out came the sun, and dried up all the rain
So the itsy bitsy spider climbed up the spout again.
Yeah right.
*Scenes taken from the movie entitled Three to Tango, starring Matthew Perry, Neve Campbell and Dylan McDermott.