life.

There are really many great things in life.
It's just whether we choose to see it or not.
Though unhappiness happens and can't be avoided at times, it's actually just how we choose to react to it.

I will always choose to grumble, runaway from problem and think how pathetic my life always is.
I just received an email recently that shows how pathetic is the life of others in the outside world, and why we should really appreciate our life and be contented with what we have.
Yes, for a moment, I thought I should really appreciate my life.
Nonetheless, I'll forgot all about it after awhile.

Actually, I guess the problems I faced can be settled somehow. It's just not that impossible.
It may be tough at that very moment, but it'll all be over soon.
It all just takes time.
What I need at that very moment, is someone who will be there for me, just listening and providing advices can just be a bonus.
I'm always observing others, be it those whom I cared about or those who are just strangers.
I observe the circle of friends that they have ...

It makes me wonder.
We all make friends during the journey of our life. They came in at different time of your life.
Which friend or which group of friends will have a longer lasting friendship?

Actually, idk who to turn to (or shd I say, who I can turn to) when I needed someone to talk to.
It's either they ain't the right ones, or that I have problem trusting anyone.
It's true, "Never put someone as your priority when you're not theirs."

I know I'm drifting from almost all my friends. It really takes effort to keep the friendship going.
I mean, it cannot just be one sided right? It can be tiring up to a certain point of time.
No matter how impt that person once was to you, you'll still get tired someday.
It does hurt to let go. It hurts even more when you dk if that person even cares.

I do treasure my friends. But only the right ones.
If I leave, I always leave for a reason. But it's just that you might not know why.
I thought you don't matter to me anymore, but in fact, you do.
And idk how to go back anymore.

Idk since when I'm getting choosy over my friends, though there aren't many of them alrdy.
I'm getting particular on how they speak, act, use of words, tone, and the non-verbals.
It irritates me when it didn't turn out like how I expected it to be.
Am I really ridiculous? >.<


Alright, back to my current life.
It's rather boring.
School - Home - Laptop - Trading - Work
That pretty sums up everything.
I don't have much of a social life, only going out like occasionally.
I don't really make an effort asking ppl out, unless I really feels like (which I seldom do).
Now that everyone are busy with different things, it's kinda hard to get everyone to attend the meet-ups anw.
Either having OT, or busy with exams, or busy with this and that.
The feeling of being rejected really sucks.

So yeah, I've just finished 2 modules before CNY this year.
Human Resource Mgmt & Cross Cultural Mgmt.
I do have quite a high expectations for scoring it well.

As for this term, am currently taking Mgmt of Organisations and Managing Change.
I thought change was a easy topic in HRM, but it turned out otherwise in this MC module.
- Perhaps, change was never a thing that can be easily understood.
MO is a very brief but interesting module, so far ...
Also, friends made in uni are still going on well. But I feel like making friends with those foreigners.
On a side note, we've got a great prog mgr ~ (:
I hope uni life go on like this till the day I graduate. Aiming for at least a 2nd upper.

Oh well, I was hoping my pt job could occupy me, but it doesn't seems so next month.
I've got another lobang though, hope it'll be an easy job ~

(trying to think if I should end this post in an optimistic or pessimistic way ...)

Abstracted the post below from 3 yrs ago. Up to now, I'm still having the same feeling.

每当无聊的时候，都会有胡乱的思想。。。
晚上的我。
哭笑不得。啊，原来笑是这么写的。

我怀念从前的快乐。我怀念的。
那单纯的过去。
但从前就没有能让我感到真正快乐的一刻。美好回忆？我回想不起。
一路走下的这段人生，弄得我好乱。我不明白这段生命的意义。那股生命的热岑都已消失。
孤单寂寞的日子， 搞得我非常无奈。我没有人们想象中的那么坚强，那么独立。
何人能抽出一些时间，静静的陪在我的身边？
从来都不敢奢望什么，只怕带来更大的失望。
好累的眼睛就像没关紧的水龙头。
一直都在崩溃的边缘。。。

我已尽力了。):
---------------------------------------------
From another point of view, thinking that life's unfair?

"We can't always control what happens to us, but we can always control how we react to it."
everything that happens to us has no meaning until we give meaning to it.
"Don't complain about thorns among roses; be grateful for roses among thorns."