Let's go up in flames, pretty lady

Perhaps it died.

As with many folks, there's a part of me that has been holding on to hope for this certain thing. Never the right time, place, person, etc. it seemed. Except recently there was an occurrance which caused me to reevaluate some things. Seems it's not external factors that are the cause, it's me. I'm somewhat dead inside on a certain level. There's really only a little sadness when I say that and it comes from recognizing missed opportunity of sorts. It's not something that has an override option and that's alright. I feel no profound sadness because of this 'discovery' and in truth, it's almost a relief. Now I can see that there's not much I could have done to get a different outcome. Even when you think you know yourself, there are surprises to be found.