I always like to challenge new things and things that I don't really know about...
I never stop trying on new stuff...
I keep on learning new thing every lesson...
I always find that it's worth to 'fight for the war'....
However, this year is the toughest year for me...
I know I can fight alone IF I'm strong enough...
BUT, I'm not that strong...
I keep on bumping the wall...
One, Twice.... It's still OK...
When it up to more than ten times...
I start to feel pain, I start to feel scare...
Everything is like happen in a sudden...
I can't manage to handle all...
I'm still not recover from the previous pain, here come another challenges...
I'm not prepare, I'm don't feel safe...
And I start to mess up everything...
Then I don't feel safe at all....
I try to handle 'em, but somehow I can't...
I feel more pain, I feel scarier...
I wish I could give up everything...
YES, everything....
I'm falling...
Fall like there is no ending....
From the outer space to deep down ocean...
You may see that I'm fine from outside,
but inner is full of tears....
Tears that I always hide from the outside world...
If someday I collapse in front of you,
please don't be shock...
As I've been holding for so long....
So long enough until I can't stand for it anymore...
I need a hug...
I need YOU...
...Left vs. Right...
I cried... I cried for the pain... I cried for feeling sad...
AND I will be crying again and again...
as I can't control the tears...
and this situation will be last until end of next month I guess...
I spend one hour trying so hard to safe it, it become better a bit...
But half an hour later, it become swollen again...
Somehow I feel like giving up on it...
