突然间……

突然间，觉得很累……
突然间，觉得我做的一切没有意义……
突然间，感觉很像停止目前面对的一切……
突然间，很想去散散心……

突然间，发现做的每一样东西都不完美……
突然间，觉得我并没有怎么用心去做好一切……
突然间，很想把接下来的一切都做得十全十美……
突然间，觉得我可以做得更完美……


Noise and motivation come at the same time. OMG! I'll be crazy soon..... 

Killing Me

The eyes contacts are killing me......... DIE DIE DIE!!! :P

Light her up

Too many things, too many noise, too many effect...

It comes to the end of the semester, which means it comes to the time where we need to hand in all the assignments and also presentations for the assignments.. 

Sometimes, working in stress is a force to move you forward. But, sometimes it gives a negative effect.

When someone is trying to move forward in the stress, and yet the results he/she got are not as good as he/she predict to score, it turns the particular person to move backward. 

And when that happen, noises come in to interrupt. The person started to question, question a lot. Question why, why these happen. It then follow by losing confidence and fall. She feels like that she is useless, she is nothing. She is LOST again.

For this time, she totally lose herself. She questioned herself seriously, and yet she can't find herself the real answer. She questioned Why you pick this course, cause the one that I really like is not allowed to study. Why you choose to major in PR instead of Broadcast, cause I want to make some changes for this time. Why you want to make changes for this time, and there is no answer for this. Do you know what you want in the future, I want freedom, I wish to fly around, I wish to meet different people, I wish to meet those people who are very experience in the living life. Do you really like people, I don't think so. And she founds that there are some contradictions between the two questions that she answered just now.

She knows what she want, but she doesn't know what she needs to do. Communicate more maybe, but she knows she can't do it as she doesn't really like to publicize and share her thought with others. She knows she will only let who is very close to her understand her.

Can you see what's in front of you? The answer is NOPE! I see nothing.... 

 

image adapted from http://almondcroissant.wordpress.com/

Can someone light her up and teach her how to be strong and stay strong?

What I want vs. What I need

Went to see counselor today with my friend. I was accompany her during that time. Okay... I'm just depress and just want to seek for relaxation. My friend was asking about the strength to push her as she know that the assignments due date is just around the corner but she still doesn't have any initiative to do the assignments. Mr. Eric, the counselor mention about she need to know what's in front her and why she chose this course. He too mentions that people work because they love their job and they enjoy their job. But, somehow I don't really agree with it. And I questioned "What if I took this course not because I'm interested with? As I was not allow to take the course that I like." He then said that then I can take this course after I complete my current course. Prove to your parent that you did it and now is your time to seek for what you want.

I did not reply. And after sometimes, I thought.... Sometimes, I just want to make some change, try something that I never do before. And I know I want to be free in the future, like flying around and enjoying the world. I know what I want, BUT I don't know what I need.

I'm Forbidden