something's wrong with my lappy....or internet browser or the server for blogger. I can't seem to see new blog postings after publishing it, and its mine that i can't see! Irritated...

3 lil' missies

In the land of the living, there are the footprints of three lil' missy all around the globe. All three, crazy, bubbly and full of zest for life have only one complain.

Miss President: I have no life.... always online all the day long >o<
Miss Ting Tong: I have no life.... always at home if there's no one to play with :(
Miss Bohemian: I have no life..... neither here nor there -_-"'

But the 3 lil' missy have more life than they think they have for they have one another to laugh with, cry with and $#%& with all the time, for the rest of their life *fingers crossed*

p/s: a tribute to the friendship we share.... u know who u r ^_^

Heart Of Father in Heaven

Had a revelation this evening on my way to dear bro's place for dinner and chillout. Was asking God to open my eyes to see what He is doing in my llife at this point with the things that He has put me through and still going through.

I must say it was really a journey of agony, to the point i was all tired out when i reach punggol and half full in stomach.

"God, please tell me what You want me to learn, what You want me to see or know through this period of time. I cannot stand it anymore, i can 'kill' people with the amount of frustrations thats in me now." As i board the train, the start of my an hour long journey, there the revelations began.

"This is the heart of a Father. Love till the point of agony and pain. Many times in your life, I could have sent my wrath, pass my judgement; since times of old, I could have done it, but I chose to love. To the point it hurts, I still chose to love."

That was the revelation that turned my heart upside down. He has chosen me, He chose to love. I cannot tell you how high, how wide, how deep, how far i knew of His love for me, but i can tell you it really hurts. I had an iceberg taste of how God feels when i sinned against the Lord by disobeying Him, when i know the decision im going to make is not what He wants for my life, neither the best, in fact silly too. I had a glimpse of how God's heart is like when im being stubborn to the core, fighting with God for my rights, wanting my own ways, going my own ways. At the same time, on the other hand, I tasted of His wondrous, high and far, wide and deep love for me. Tears came but could not cry cos im on the train! *arrgh*

When i reached, the end of my train ride, blasting into my ears are the words "oceans will part, nations come at the whisper of Your call", i ceased fighting, cos He has shown me His heart of a Father. Its as tough for me cos im a sinner saved by grace, but its a necessary journey for me to know of His Father's heart in a deeper measure. Yes, He loves me. Yes, He can move mountains. Cos He loves me to the point of not just pain and agony but to the point of death on the Cross so that i can be reconciled back to Him.

As i write, my heart is still in torrents cos of what He said. I still need His intervention. His presence.

Psalms 4:5 " Offer the right sacrifices and trust in the Lord"

Which do u often fail to do? I often fail to do both... either i offered the wrong sacrifices or i doubt God, both are equally destructive.
I started the year with blessings and promises, great gifts and miracles. But yet, in my heart, at the back of my mind, there is this gnawing thought that's growing, when is it coming?
What is the it? A breakthrough? A miracle? A life changing moment? I dunno seriously, somehow, inside me, something is growing and im getting lethargic as i know its there, but i have no idea what is it. Trying to hold myself down to be still, to be steady, so that i can seek an answer from Him. Still trying...

This verse has been with me for 3 weeks, its still here with me.

Monday started not very well, for some reason, i was feeling pek chek (frustrated) and grouchy the whole day.
As the day unfolds, though i was still feeling like oscar the grouch, things turn out to be okie. Went for my long overdue facial to get all the unwanted things out of my face, things started to lighten up abit.

Monday ended well though, after the facial and a long time catch up with freaky friend. Its been soo long since we last dated one another (in her words, haven pator for very long). hahhaha... its good to be able to share everything, every feeling, every thought honestly and directly and unreservedly, cos you know that u can trust urself with this person. It really feels good ^_^ especially when i can be as silly as i want, as illogical as i want, as emotional as i want cos i know im known. I dunno what am i doing now or heading to, but i know it is okie as long as He knows and i have freaky frens like freaky fren around to root for me...

AWESOME!! was listening to a short recording of a testimony from church on how the Lord used him when he choose to obey.

After the 20 minutes of the recording, the spirit within me is so excited, pounding wildly at the fact God still speaks and is still calling ordinary people to do extraordinary things (even foolish things, depends on which side of the coin are u at ^_^)

The 2nd thing that makes my heart went wild and eyes wet is the question, are you willing to be a fool? Its so familiar yet sounds like a question of old. When i was young (in the faith that is), we were always challenged with the above. Are you willing to be a fool for Christ? Upon the affirmation and calling of the Lord Himself to do foolish things, or bluntly STOOoopid things. My heart have long forgotten how it feels like to be challenged with this question.. guess i have fallen into the old bags category for some time.

The testimony tasted like rain on desertland, sparkles in a quiet night and big arch of rainbow over the stormy sky... im excited, my spirit is excited, my heart is not at rest, my mind is blown... God, I want more. Not the old bags, but of childlike faith and humble spirit. For i know, You are moving, You want ppl who are willing, You are calling.

check out the ladies God blessed me.... fotos taken by a bro who blessed my life greatly ever since i knew him in the little office at GRTH 8 years ago... *click the link below*

http://cheesecity.blogspot.com

I am truly blessed ^_^ im a happy girl.

There are many first times in life.

I had a few in a day today.
- Went to Hall 8 for service this morning.. Not as bad as i hearsay. But i prefer my home 2 doors away... hee.. there's a home feel to it.
- A groupie i was today! Never in my life had i queued up to get cd autographed by the people who made them... not even by MAYDAY! but i realised i HATE queueing!!!! hahaha.. i was blessed though.. shook hands with the anointed ones *got jj so red-eyed*
- Witness the salvation of a dear fren, my very first in last 9 nine years *so involved, so firsthand*
- due to the above, tasted what it means to reap what others sowed and trusting in the Lord.
- due to the above above, faith was built in me a new never before.

I am excited cos of the way this year started. The Lord has already begun what He planted in my heart... New, different, mind blowing, faith building! Just believe! I know there are more in store *-*

this was like ages ago... but it was only 365 days old. She is another darling of mine.. we are so different yet i know there will not be another in the days to come. Growing from strength to strength, glory to glory and beauty to beauty *is there something like that?? haha*
More than words can say.... ^_^ love ya, pretty! Jiayou!

Until yesterday, the girl next to me was my best travel kaki, KTV cheonger, MAYDAY's avid fan, book buyer! Today! She is more than that! She is my sister-in Christ too ^_^ yeah!
my 2nd present came by the grace of God... the Lord built in me great faith through this journey in the past 3 weeks. He is indeed faithful and true to His words. Im waiting and asking for more! The list thats in my heart is so so long.. but now.. i have only 2 words to meet all of my anxious desire for each and everyone of them. ONLY BELIEVE.

hee.. skiing for the very first time. SO clumsy!!!! but i fell in love with the thrill of skiding down the slope and still on my two feet when im at the foot of the hill! Sooooo EXCITING!! can't stop giggling when i was able to do it!
Look so tak glam in this outfit... next time when i go skiing, must wear nicer outfit! HAHAHA!!

i love this picture.. taken at the airport when we were getting ready to go home. Also a night when the skies outside were littered with bright stars aplenty. Never forgot how awesome it was to throw my head backwards to gaze at the bright stars in the cold wind of Shanghai.

It was an unforgettable night personally as i give thanks to God for everything in 2006. The bright stars that night was a gift to me as it waas the only night where i see stars shining so brightly in the winter nightsky.

Jiajun!!! i have one for ah hia.. here's one for u.. hee! Super Curly branches!
this is found in the 御花园 of Beijing's Forbidden City.

Chaoyang ah hia! this is for u... found in shenyang *i think*

fotos

Sunset in Beijing, outside the high walls of the Forbiddden City...















Great Wall of China.. im a 好汉 ^_^















Shenyang, the first stop in Northeast China.
brrr.. getting cold.



















excited to see colours on trees...
i like the crunching sound of snow!
Can u feel the chill in us?

me

Gleeful me in my winter clothes n my travel aka mayday kaki... i look cute right? heee..

new toy

new toy for the new year! Sony Ericsson phone! its bling bling lor... hahah! superficial me bought it cos its pretty in pink and its stylo running words when there's incoming calls or messages.

Was pleasantly surprised at how user friendly it was... especially for someone who used nokia for as long as she remembers. Then, realised i joined the ranks of many Sony Ericsson buddies.. and they happen to be my ktv kakis in church.. hee.

Yes! i became a gadget kid unknowingly.. ipod in april and a new phone! haha.. n im thinking of an APPLE! shucks!

Side note to mun gor n jj: though im a siao mayday fan, im waiting expectantly for ur debut. heee... so that i get front row seats for free when u r famous! haha! Shout His Name as loud as you can, as far as you could ^_^ dreaming with you. YeAh!

MAYDAY

终于买到了！五月天的专辑……很不一样的曲风，却仍然保留了小白脸长久以来写词的功力，也保留了感情细腻、甜到心坎、温柔和浪漫指数百分百的情歌。

我要承认从来没有试过不停地播放他们的任何一张专辑，这张是例外。

对！我是忠实的歌迷，因为我对小白脸的歌词常常有共鸣。因为我常被他的细腻文字感动到无法言喻。因为我在他的歌里找到我要的迷迭香。因为我在他们五子的身上看到了团结、互爱、友情、真实感。

这张专辑的好多首歌都让我深深感动、久久无法忘记他笔下的文字……

神阿！感谢您创造出如此才子……您应该很骄傲吧。我会尽情期待……您知道我在说什么吧，哈哈，阿门。

1 week!

Wooo! 2nd week of Jan is here!

Im a happy kid :) cos i saw God's hands moving in my family. cos i saw God's hands moving in my life. cos i saw God's hands moving in church. cos i saw God's presence in my life.

Im an excited kid :) cos a loved one came to the saving knowledge of Jesus Christ. cos a dear friend is a prayer away to seal her covenant with God. cos this year promised to be an exciting one as long as i remain focused.

Im a blessed kid :) cos i saw the beautiful reminder of God's covenant with Noah painted in the sky on the first day of Jan. cos i know that there are people who truly care and love me. cos i know that there are buddies that God has blessed me with to share some of my horns with me. cos i know that God still loves me deeply.. GRIN ^_^

Im a well loved kid :) cos i have God's love and presence in my life.

Happening Dec! To china and learnt to ski... to Kluang for christmas with my bros n sis from church, where we had fun laughing n crying, eating n playing silly games... to Mun gor's place for sleepover (impromptu) and watch DeathNote!!! * sidenote: MUN GOR!!!!! I haven watch finish!!! Light is cute lor... though he is evil or siao for that matter*

haha.. its cool hanging out with cool people.. jus chill n relac one corner.. yet, can share the deepest, darkest secrets of all ages with one another,slapping thighs when we hear resonated comments or feelings... wahahah!!! shuang si le!

Love you guys man.. always brighten my days to know that im not the only sore thumb out there! More, more, more!!!

who am i

Am i who you say i am? Am i who others say i am? Am i who i say i am? Am i who God say i am?

Who am i? Made up of outer skin, inner bones, organs and tissues, feelings and brains, who am i really?

Am i the one who i know? How i feel, what i think? Am i kidding myself or others? or others kidding themselves and me? Im not getting schizo here, those who know wat im saying knows, those who dont, its okie.. its not important.

Im jus wondering, the me from the mouths of others, even from myself, are they real? or are they jus a beautiful picture? or worse, what they think it is?

I care, don't i? I do, if not,i will not be pondering; if not, i will not writing what im writing now; if not, i will not be feeling what im feeling now.
Maybe just maybe, my heart is bigger than my brain.. but i know.. im more than a heart person. If not, i will be jus a brainless person who cant think.. then i wonder who have i been in Christ all these years. Then i wonder who have been making the decisions the last few years for me.

new year...

Happy New Year! its a brand new year.. and 2 holidays to begin with. Not so bad afterall?

Been playing and out of home most of the days since i came back. Hanged out with many dear frens, caught up with one another.
Been an interesting time since i came back, many things happened, happy and sad.

However, let me first give thanks to God, the Almighty who had let 2006 been a good one. He who gave me good frens, buddies. He who gave me favour at work, wonderful students who are so adorable. He who gave me the ability to go play and see the world. He who gave me the freedom and liberty to live a life He wants me to.

I chose to live life to the fullest, making most of every minute that He gave. Im choosing to live life smiling in His face again, the double portion of blessings He blessed me with, Elisha, Elisha, to live with that kind of persistence and faithfulness. To live boldly when God's anointing is upon me, to heal, to resurrect, to BELIEVE! He is a God who is mighty, faithful and never change. Hallelujah!