i want to hold your hand♥

It takes events in motion to make known to you how truly close to home the things you'd never imagine really were.

What dose it really mean to be alive anyway, the feel of skin on skin or burn in the lungs as you push yourself to the limit- is that all there is to it? The implicit seeking out of answers in the meaning of life, is that our true purpose in this drawn out process? And if that were the case, what would the meaning of death be- the end of that quest with no answers as you lie cold in your grave?

It takes a split second for your head to split clear with the realization how truly insignificant one really is in the face of the entirety of this world. A quick passing, the world gapes for two seconds and then, calmly returns to its usual routine of normality. Only the flowers resting remain as a representation that one even existed.

Its said that absence makes the heart fonder, but with the fondness comes the true ache of yearning, missing, the deafening silence ringing louder -how oxymoronic but that's as far as it goes.

The little moments that remind you of who you are, whom you were- memories, memories, memories- and oh that wish that you could return to before but that moment passed in time and silence, is all that surrounds you as you stand where you are, truly and utterly alone, though the shadowy figures as if next to you-but not quite-are there, ever-present as you walk forward determinedly, the only path you have.

to stop and think and wonder♥

Life and Death and Knowledge

I.
You have only these hours and days.

II.
When you accept them,
you have no need of
afterlives or priorlives.
You have the single empty box
of a life and all the universe
to fill it with.

III.
Live like this: there is an end to you.
Don’t fear it. Don’t wallow.
Flowers wilt. Rivers dry up.
Even the stars extinguish themselves.
Have your time and then let it go.

IV.
Do not shy from your ending
with mad horse eyes.

V.
Allow the box of your life,
when you have filled it,
to have its spaces.
Resist the temptation
to stuff the gaps with gods
who do not know you.

VI.
Pull Uncertainty into your arms
and kiss her on the lips:
too many neglect her,
but she is an eager lover,
and desires only your attention.
Let her teach you how to say
“I don’t know, and that is beautiful.”

VII.
You have only these minutes and years.

This poem © Gabriel Gadfly. Published Aug 2, 2011

fall asleep in hopes of dreaming♥

Maybe I'm not ready but I'll try...
-Asher Book

Here's to steep learning curves that never stop, to friends who never cease to amaze me and to little moments that make life all the more worthwhile.

School's started and suddenly the reality that you're in a whole new environment kicks in, the foraging for food, the realisation that laundry doesn't get done until you do it, the moment of being alone, or rather, coming home to an empty room that's overly quiet and rather bleak periods of solitude.

Home has never been further away or closer to the heart.

Just when you think the roof's about to crumble, someone somewhere holds the fort for you. And under the starlit sky, someone's watching too. Because you are not alone, never alone. And I know that now.