Ah goodness this isnt really an entry, more like a diary for certain data. Here goes.
8th Oct - waist 95 cm, weight 70.1 kilos
1st day of 7-day Detox programme. 6 caps at noon, 6 caps at abt 5.20 pm. Took Ruskie for a 40 min jog.
4 foot patches, 2 on each side at night 10.30 pm
This blog will soon no longer serve as a blog as I will re-locate. This blog will then be used as data entry like the one u're looking at in the first few lines. Cuz I don't keep a diary so this is my diary, but it wont make sense to anyone. Ahahaha!!
Might as well blog. Started work at Redmont Mining Camp 200 km south of Port Hedland with Chef Domenico Roberto and Chao An. Domenic quit and replaced by Chef Leo Ridlik (or something like that) and also working with Chef Ronald Samson. Went to Port Hedland @ 16th Sept. Returned from West Angelas on 5th Sept tho cant remember when I actually went there.
Been busy as hell. Started using the Holosync Audio Technology on the 5th Sept. On the 18th Sept started using full 1 hour sessions of Holosync. Crazy technology I tell u. Jennifer's B'day at swong's house.
Spirituality?
Watever I can see, feel, touch, smell, is real. Anything other than that, please dont bother me with it.
Anyway, back to my anime. Adioz!
Tuesday, October 09, 2007
Saturday, August 04, 2007
Incredible wat can happen in 1 1/2 months
Yups, its like a month and a 1/2 since my last post, and in some sense a lot has 'occured' ahahha!
I have been to 2x RAW sessions (5 hours each) at church with Aunt Ruth and the deliverance team. The 1st session was pretty good, but the 2nd one probably drove me so far away from God that I've hit a wall. Call it a regression, but I think some teachings in church are WAY out of logical porpotions and well in my own opinion, is more detremental to my life/faith than anything else!!
The RAW sessions have taught me that -
Anything that isnt from the Bible is essentially... wrong AND demonic.
We have to live 100% of our lives according to 'God's will'.
Sure it sounds great and all, but lets face it, sometimes it takes more Bible knowledge to be a sinner than a saint! Like I could say 'God will provide all my needs' then refuse to go to school or find a job. Or be a glutton cuz the Bible says 'Eat drink and be merry'. Get my point here?
Thats exactly my point. I learnt martial arts cuz I love it (Tae Kwon Do, Muay Thai) and it was a good source of discipline (tho I wish I had more of it). Yet in the RAW session I was told that Jesus is my defender so I should reject all forms of martial arts. Cant I have a hobby that helps me keep fit and discipline my mind? Martial arts doesnt teach you to kill people, rather it teaches you to respect others and be model citizens. Agressive mentalities come from high-sugar diets and poor upbringing! Dont believe me why not try attending any form of Martial Art forms and see what they teach before, during and after the physical trainings? Tae Bo expert Billy Blanks always say stuff like 'never say or do anything to hurt others' and 'always look for the good in those around you' during his classes.
This is simply a speck of what happened in all 10 hours of the RAW sessions of course, to explain all of it here would end up in a thesis. My question is simply this:
Where do YOUR teachings come from?
In my experience with Anglican and Baptist churches, why dont they have anything like this?
I agree with the notion that 99% of right teaching is good, but even 1% of error is detremental. In fact, I myself ADVOCATE this idea. 98% of rat poison is edible food, only 2% is arsenic. So if you clain that your teachings of RAW are from the Bible 100%.... are you really sure??
Maybe all of us need to get a copy of The Facts On False Teachings in the Church by Dr. John Ankerberg http://www.amazon.com/gp/reader/0890817146/ref=sib_dp_pt/103-9634050-6867840#reader-link before going to the next Sunday service and really use our brains before listening to everything our 'leaders' have to say.
On that note....
I guess I'll give Mind OS a try. I'm only on the 2nd DVD and its getting really hyper complicated. So far Dr. Paul talked about Psychological Trauma and damage to the Boundary, Currency and the Economics of Psychology, Interdependance and its function in relationships, Pathological Narcissim and its enemy status to Decision Power, and how your Left Brain is the Book Smart part of ur brain (nerd?) while your Right Brain is the Street Smart part, and how geniuses like Leonardo Da Vinci and Einstein are the ones who are able to unlock the powers of combining the max potential of both sides of the brain. This is also something I've learnt in Secrets Behind the Iron Curtain many years ago so like yups this info is quite validated.
Christianity vs Psychology. Isnt it funny that we even have psychological doctors who are also Christian? Instead of askin the question 'can Christianity and psychology mix?'... I guess I choose to say 'why not?'. If combined together and can help all of us improve our lives (such as kicking addictive behaviours, bad habits, negative thoughts, and building up self confidence and a thirst for education) then I say go for it loh. Hey even Pat Mesiti (Pastor Pat Mesiti actually, who spoke at the Ignite Conference) has a 4-cd set called The Millionaires Club and other secular teaching material. Even The book Secrets Of Great Success Coaches Exposed which also features Pat Mesiti strongly advocate NLP and the likes. Geez why are some Christians so paranoid about these things anyway? If u think NLP is weird, then I think u're even weirder! Try listening to ppl like Anthony Robbins http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cpc-t-Uwv1I and see if I'm lying to u or not lah (ok he doesnt use NLP but NLP is more hardcore than Anthony Robbins).
Anyway as a quick recap, I've stopped drinking for over 2 months now, and this is my 16th day without cigarettes. Maybe it was God who helped me, but well at least I'm taking steps to improve the quality of my life. Baby steps, but still I'm DOING something about it. Chiaoz!!
I have been to 2x RAW sessions (5 hours each) at church with Aunt Ruth and the deliverance team. The 1st session was pretty good, but the 2nd one probably drove me so far away from God that I've hit a wall. Call it a regression, but I think some teachings in church are WAY out of logical porpotions and well in my own opinion, is more detremental to my life/faith than anything else!!
The RAW sessions have taught me that -
Anything that isnt from the Bible is essentially... wrong AND demonic.
We have to live 100% of our lives according to 'God's will'.
Sure it sounds great and all, but lets face it, sometimes it takes more Bible knowledge to be a sinner than a saint! Like I could say 'God will provide all my needs' then refuse to go to school or find a job. Or be a glutton cuz the Bible says 'Eat drink and be merry'. Get my point here?
Thats exactly my point. I learnt martial arts cuz I love it (Tae Kwon Do, Muay Thai) and it was a good source of discipline (tho I wish I had more of it). Yet in the RAW session I was told that Jesus is my defender so I should reject all forms of martial arts. Cant I have a hobby that helps me keep fit and discipline my mind? Martial arts doesnt teach you to kill people, rather it teaches you to respect others and be model citizens. Agressive mentalities come from high-sugar diets and poor upbringing! Dont believe me why not try attending any form of Martial Art forms and see what they teach before, during and after the physical trainings? Tae Bo expert Billy Blanks always say stuff like 'never say or do anything to hurt others' and 'always look for the good in those around you' during his classes.
This is simply a speck of what happened in all 10 hours of the RAW sessions of course, to explain all of it here would end up in a thesis. My question is simply this:
Where do YOUR teachings come from?
In my experience with Anglican and Baptist churches, why dont they have anything like this?
I agree with the notion that 99% of right teaching is good, but even 1% of error is detremental. In fact, I myself ADVOCATE this idea. 98% of rat poison is edible food, only 2% is arsenic. So if you clain that your teachings of RAW are from the Bible 100%.... are you really sure??
Maybe all of us need to get a copy of The Facts On False Teachings in the Church by Dr. John Ankerberg http://www.amazon.com/gp/reader/0890817146/ref=sib_dp_pt/103-9634050-6867840#reader-link before going to the next Sunday service and really use our brains before listening to everything our 'leaders' have to say.
On that note....
I guess I'll give Mind OS a try. I'm only on the 2nd DVD and its getting really hyper complicated. So far Dr. Paul talked about Psychological Trauma and damage to the Boundary, Currency and the Economics of Psychology, Interdependance and its function in relationships, Pathological Narcissim and its enemy status to Decision Power, and how your Left Brain is the Book Smart part of ur brain (nerd?) while your Right Brain is the Street Smart part, and how geniuses like Leonardo Da Vinci and Einstein are the ones who are able to unlock the powers of combining the max potential of both sides of the brain. This is also something I've learnt in Secrets Behind the Iron Curtain many years ago so like yups this info is quite validated.
Christianity vs Psychology. Isnt it funny that we even have psychological doctors who are also Christian? Instead of askin the question 'can Christianity and psychology mix?'... I guess I choose to say 'why not?'. If combined together and can help all of us improve our lives (such as kicking addictive behaviours, bad habits, negative thoughts, and building up self confidence and a thirst for education) then I say go for it loh. Hey even Pat Mesiti (Pastor Pat Mesiti actually, who spoke at the Ignite Conference) has a 4-cd set called The Millionaires Club and other secular teaching material. Even The book Secrets Of Great Success Coaches Exposed which also features Pat Mesiti strongly advocate NLP and the likes. Geez why are some Christians so paranoid about these things anyway? If u think NLP is weird, then I think u're even weirder! Try listening to ppl like Anthony Robbins http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cpc-t-Uwv1I and see if I'm lying to u or not lah (ok he doesnt use NLP but NLP is more hardcore than Anthony Robbins).
Anyway as a quick recap, I've stopped drinking for over 2 months now, and this is my 16th day without cigarettes. Maybe it was God who helped me, but well at least I'm taking steps to improve the quality of my life. Baby steps, but still I'm DOING something about it. Chiaoz!!
Sunday, June 17, 2007
Breaking the chains
My new journey to living for God and His purpose.... In a sense, my impaired vision somehow lead me back to living for God. Just like what Pastor Benny preached today in a similar sense. That you are forced to grow when you face death face to face. Its not as bad, but there are similarities.
What would you do when you discover that you may one day become blind, impaired, paralysed, or some irreversible damage to your 5 senses or loss of a limb happened to you? How will life be after that?
Thats right. You start to think a lot. The three stages... denial, grief and acceptance. First I didnt want to believe that there was a possibility that I could go blind at any stage of life (or ANYTHING like that). Then I grieved like crazy, going into bouts of depression and denial. After facing the facts, I eventually accepted it. All in all, while thinking a lot of what my life means and how fragile life really is. I could've blamed God for this and simply turned away completely from Him. But with the help and spiritual support from Leon, Aunt Ruth and Uncle David... My life has started to change rather unexpectedly. Also from a prophetic message of hope from HY, I started to re-vamp my mindset.
So what about great wealth and material gain? Like the millionaire cancer patient who would give up a million bucks to re-gain a simple appetite for food. That was from Ps. Benny as well btw. I keep thinking, what if I spend years storing up material wealth and get killed in an accident? Would it be worth it? My mindset has gradually changed over the past 7 days. For the first time on my own, I have actually poured out to God, telling Him all my fears and simply clinging to Him. One good news from this is...
I have given up alcohol, and I choose to give it up indefinitely! I cannot guarantee that I can do this in the long term, but I tell God to lead me, step by step, one day at a time. Other bad habits will follow suit. One day at a time, one step at a time. One bondage at a time.
Somehow today I am very sad. Cuz I have to accept a fate of a few lost so-called 'friendships'. Not going into details... But then, I thought to myself ->
'This isnt your time. You have bigger things to worry about. Your time hasn't come. For now your assignment is to follow Me by faith, with discipline and endurance. Until all bondages are broken, and a consistent life of prayer and living in-sync with what I have called you for. That is what you have to do for now. Now is not your time to be fooling around. Now, is your time to faithfully execute your assignment."
It's really hard. My endurance levels are thin. Praying becomes more difficult by the day. I'm not even sure if these friendships will ever be restored even if I faithfully do this assignment. It's not a 1-week or 1-month assignment. Its an on-going assignment till the day I die. Quite daunting isnt it?
But at the back of my mind, I somehow hear myself say -> "By that time, you wont even remember these 'friendships'. You will have greater challenges to prepare for. You will have bigger responsibilities to uphold. By that time, none of these things will matter anymore. Now you just cant see it. Now you just see your current hopeless situation. Trust in Me, let Me lead you by faith and eventually, you will see what I have called you for."
I swear I cant be talking to myself like that. Was it God talking to me? While I was driving my car? It just sounded like my own voice. Nothing dramatic, nothing extravagant. Why am I just looking at my hopeless situation? That I am no way in control of anything I do?
Cuz its the truth. I'm not in control of anything. As much as I have been fighting to be in total control of my life, I am not. I simply, cannot.
There's a reason for everything. I cant remain so bloody immature my whole life. Stand up, straighten my back, and walk tall in the midst of my broken heart and soul. Guilt is not from God. I have asked forgiveness from those I've sinned against. I have done my part. This new bondage that has just surfaced is not from God, for God condemns not those who follow His will. I will fall and fail God several times this coming week, but I have to keep standing back up. No more 'buts', no more 'what if', no more nonsense!!
One day at a time. One chain at a time. One responsibility at a time. One step at a time. Faith is like riding a bicycle in total darkness, with just a small flashlight to lead the way. I simply must follow this small light. I may stumble, I may fall, I may bruise myself... even worse, I might hit someone in the process, I may crash and hurt a few people... then what do I do?
Simply this:
To the Cross nothing I bring, to the Cross I simply cling.
I do not want to be ashamed of living for You anymore. I am not alone. There are others just like me, some probably even worse off than me. I guess, for this purpose I am where I am today.
My heart aches more and more by the minute as I write this. I sometimes wonder why...
What would you do when you discover that you may one day become blind, impaired, paralysed, or some irreversible damage to your 5 senses or loss of a limb happened to you? How will life be after that?
Thats right. You start to think a lot. The three stages... denial, grief and acceptance. First I didnt want to believe that there was a possibility that I could go blind at any stage of life (or ANYTHING like that). Then I grieved like crazy, going into bouts of depression and denial. After facing the facts, I eventually accepted it. All in all, while thinking a lot of what my life means and how fragile life really is. I could've blamed God for this and simply turned away completely from Him. But with the help and spiritual support from Leon, Aunt Ruth and Uncle David... My life has started to change rather unexpectedly. Also from a prophetic message of hope from HY, I started to re-vamp my mindset.
So what about great wealth and material gain? Like the millionaire cancer patient who would give up a million bucks to re-gain a simple appetite for food. That was from Ps. Benny as well btw. I keep thinking, what if I spend years storing up material wealth and get killed in an accident? Would it be worth it? My mindset has gradually changed over the past 7 days. For the first time on my own, I have actually poured out to God, telling Him all my fears and simply clinging to Him. One good news from this is...
I have given up alcohol, and I choose to give it up indefinitely! I cannot guarantee that I can do this in the long term, but I tell God to lead me, step by step, one day at a time. Other bad habits will follow suit. One day at a time, one step at a time. One bondage at a time.
Somehow today I am very sad. Cuz I have to accept a fate of a few lost so-called 'friendships'. Not going into details... But then, I thought to myself ->
'This isnt your time. You have bigger things to worry about. Your time hasn't come. For now your assignment is to follow Me by faith, with discipline and endurance. Until all bondages are broken, and a consistent life of prayer and living in-sync with what I have called you for. That is what you have to do for now. Now is not your time to be fooling around. Now, is your time to faithfully execute your assignment."
It's really hard. My endurance levels are thin. Praying becomes more difficult by the day. I'm not even sure if these friendships will ever be restored even if I faithfully do this assignment. It's not a 1-week or 1-month assignment. Its an on-going assignment till the day I die. Quite daunting isnt it?
But at the back of my mind, I somehow hear myself say -> "By that time, you wont even remember these 'friendships'. You will have greater challenges to prepare for. You will have bigger responsibilities to uphold. By that time, none of these things will matter anymore. Now you just cant see it. Now you just see your current hopeless situation. Trust in Me, let Me lead you by faith and eventually, you will see what I have called you for."
I swear I cant be talking to myself like that. Was it God talking to me? While I was driving my car? It just sounded like my own voice. Nothing dramatic, nothing extravagant. Why am I just looking at my hopeless situation? That I am no way in control of anything I do?
Cuz its the truth. I'm not in control of anything. As much as I have been fighting to be in total control of my life, I am not. I simply, cannot.
There's a reason for everything. I cant remain so bloody immature my whole life. Stand up, straighten my back, and walk tall in the midst of my broken heart and soul. Guilt is not from God. I have asked forgiveness from those I've sinned against. I have done my part. This new bondage that has just surfaced is not from God, for God condemns not those who follow His will. I will fall and fail God several times this coming week, but I have to keep standing back up. No more 'buts', no more 'what if', no more nonsense!!
One day at a time. One chain at a time. One responsibility at a time. One step at a time. Faith is like riding a bicycle in total darkness, with just a small flashlight to lead the way. I simply must follow this small light. I may stumble, I may fall, I may bruise myself... even worse, I might hit someone in the process, I may crash and hurt a few people... then what do I do?
Simply this:
To the Cross nothing I bring, to the Cross I simply cling.
I do not want to be ashamed of living for You anymore. I am not alone. There are others just like me, some probably even worse off than me. I guess, for this purpose I am where I am today.
My heart aches more and more by the minute as I write this. I sometimes wonder why...
Saturday, June 02, 2007
Central Serous Retinopathy
WAT A RELIEF!!!!!
For the past 2 days I was contemplating suicide cuz of my eye condition... I tot that it was a nervous disorder/cancer or equivalent that might cause me to be totally blind or something. I'd rather die than lose my eyesight or any of my 5 main senses! Seriously.... I was so worried I could've jus find a way to buy a gun and clock it thru my head when the doctor would announce that I would be blind!
After 2 gruelling days visiting 4 doctors in 3 places (Kenso Medical Centre, Freo Hospital, Princess Margaret Childrens Hospital) the conclusion was that I have Central Serous Retinopathy, which is common in men my age and occurs mainly due to stress. It is some form of leakage in the blood vessel that causes me to see a 'ghost' light in one eye everytime I blink, as well as blurred vision. Given a certain amount of time, it will normally heal on its own.
Otherwise, laser surgery is prescribed where it can fully be tackled.
Phew.... now then....
What was I so stressed about?
My lame future... thats all. At some point I'd jus given myself a false hope that yea maybe... I might perform a scam to swipe off a few million bucks and make myself at the top of the world.
Sometimes I delude myself with such fantasies, and when I come back to reality, well.... life is jus wat it is. Mundane, sometimes seemingly hopeless... well.. I certainly dont see the big picture here... and most of all, I just crave for an easy way out of life.
I've been working so many years, but dun seem to have enough money. I want to buy a nice house, but after visiting a mortgage firm, I simply cant afford it where I am. I applied to work at the mines, but funny ppl like Shi En tells me to re-consider it (of course I'm not as fortunate as u man, u're a bloody engineer!!). Paycheck after paycheck... but still I dun see any success as I can only dream of!
So how, work all my life like a cow until I die? What of course is my WORSE fear and concern?
That I will never make it big enough to support a wife - I want to be rich enough so my wife will never have to work (of course I'm still single, but this is my 1st and greatest goal).
Guess thats abt it. UNTIL I MAKE IT BIG ... THEN will I find myself a goal where I will find a woman who can share my dreams with me.
But then I guess.... thats totally futile at this point. What a disappointment I have been. Can I really 'win' in this lifetime?
Then again, I dont think I'm alone on this issue. Maybe..
I jus need a break.
For the past 2 days I was contemplating suicide cuz of my eye condition... I tot that it was a nervous disorder/cancer or equivalent that might cause me to be totally blind or something. I'd rather die than lose my eyesight or any of my 5 main senses! Seriously.... I was so worried I could've jus find a way to buy a gun and clock it thru my head when the doctor would announce that I would be blind!
After 2 gruelling days visiting 4 doctors in 3 places (Kenso Medical Centre, Freo Hospital, Princess Margaret Childrens Hospital) the conclusion was that I have Central Serous Retinopathy, which is common in men my age and occurs mainly due to stress. It is some form of leakage in the blood vessel that causes me to see a 'ghost' light in one eye everytime I blink, as well as blurred vision. Given a certain amount of time, it will normally heal on its own.
Otherwise, laser surgery is prescribed where it can fully be tackled.
Phew.... now then....
What was I so stressed about?
My lame future... thats all. At some point I'd jus given myself a false hope that yea maybe... I might perform a scam to swipe off a few million bucks and make myself at the top of the world.
Sometimes I delude myself with such fantasies, and when I come back to reality, well.... life is jus wat it is. Mundane, sometimes seemingly hopeless... well.. I certainly dont see the big picture here... and most of all, I just crave for an easy way out of life.
I've been working so many years, but dun seem to have enough money. I want to buy a nice house, but after visiting a mortgage firm, I simply cant afford it where I am. I applied to work at the mines, but funny ppl like Shi En tells me to re-consider it (of course I'm not as fortunate as u man, u're a bloody engineer!!). Paycheck after paycheck... but still I dun see any success as I can only dream of!
So how, work all my life like a cow until I die? What of course is my WORSE fear and concern?
That I will never make it big enough to support a wife - I want to be rich enough so my wife will never have to work (of course I'm still single, but this is my 1st and greatest goal).
Guess thats abt it. UNTIL I MAKE IT BIG ... THEN will I find myself a goal where I will find a woman who can share my dreams with me.
But then I guess.... thats totally futile at this point. What a disappointment I have been. Can I really 'win' in this lifetime?
Then again, I dont think I'm alone on this issue. Maybe..
I jus need a break.
Thursday, May 31, 2007
Vision...
Ah sashiburi... ahahah... its been a while...
Recently for about over 1 week now... I have been having a crazy fear, a fear that I"ve told no one about.... that I'm losing vision in my left eye.
I dunno how it happened, but sometime back, I could see a 'shadowing' from my left eye... its like seeing a blot of bacteria hovering right in front of me. But only thru my left eye. Every time I blink, it appears... and yes, over the past 7 days or so, I have been starting to lose vision from my left eye...
Its really scary... I believe it has something to do with the nerve system or somewhere there. Even now I have to squint even while watching tv. I dun know how it happened... it just happened all of a sudden. And my eyesight has been deteorating rapidly over the past week.
I"m scared out of my wits. In a sense, I can feel like 'yeah I deserve it'. Like probably God's punishment upon me for my lack of faith and devotion to Him. The people around me now might have found me quite disturbed, tho I cannot explain this to them. I dun wanna go blind out of the blue. I keep asking God... just 1-2 more weeks... 1-2 more weeks allow me to have proper sight.
Until the point where I skipped work for 2 days. I wake up hardly knowing where I'm going... cuz my left eye is so screwed that I cannot see properly what's in front of me. If I close my left eye and fully depend on my right eye, I can focus on the road etc.
Well.... life sure is full of suprises aint it...
Maybe in a few weeks I might opt for an eye operation... I dunno... I'm trying to find out wats wrong. If life isnt as bad as it already is...
Trust me, it can always go for the worse...
Treasure your body and soul as it is now, for there may come a time...
It may turn out in a way where u cant even imagine happening to u.
Recently for about over 1 week now... I have been having a crazy fear, a fear that I"ve told no one about.... that I'm losing vision in my left eye.
I dunno how it happened, but sometime back, I could see a 'shadowing' from my left eye... its like seeing a blot of bacteria hovering right in front of me. But only thru my left eye. Every time I blink, it appears... and yes, over the past 7 days or so, I have been starting to lose vision from my left eye...
Its really scary... I believe it has something to do with the nerve system or somewhere there. Even now I have to squint even while watching tv. I dun know how it happened... it just happened all of a sudden. And my eyesight has been deteorating rapidly over the past week.
I"m scared out of my wits. In a sense, I can feel like 'yeah I deserve it'. Like probably God's punishment upon me for my lack of faith and devotion to Him. The people around me now might have found me quite disturbed, tho I cannot explain this to them. I dun wanna go blind out of the blue. I keep asking God... just 1-2 more weeks... 1-2 more weeks allow me to have proper sight.
Until the point where I skipped work for 2 days. I wake up hardly knowing where I'm going... cuz my left eye is so screwed that I cannot see properly what's in front of me. If I close my left eye and fully depend on my right eye, I can focus on the road etc.
Well.... life sure is full of suprises aint it...
Maybe in a few weeks I might opt for an eye operation... I dunno... I'm trying to find out wats wrong. If life isnt as bad as it already is...
Trust me, it can always go for the worse...
Treasure your body and soul as it is now, for there may come a time...
It may turn out in a way where u cant even imagine happening to u.
Sunday, May 06, 2007
D.I.G., Mind OS, and my next step to success in life!
Just yesterday I was having a conversation with Uncle Kim concerning my worries over changing jobs and going to work at the mines (currently my target is Rio Tinto at Pilbarra, one of the biggest mining projects in WA) and well he was very supportive. After exchanging ideas, I may not just work as a cook/chef but perhaps if the situation is favouarable, I may take up extra training and work as a Haulpack Operator (ahahaa, like travelling 1 kilometre INTO the mines and actually digging Iron Ore with monster trucks and drilling equiptment). Cuz the pay is even greater (depending on the risk and labour, can range from $2000 pw to $800 PER DAY. The higher the risk/labour intensity, the higher the pay). I'm currently NOT exactly too keen on doing something like that but well, put my money where my mouth is, probably jus a matter of time till I make that decision.
I finally wrote out my crappy resume (man its been a while since I've ever written ANYTHING like that) to be used in my application to Rio Tinto. By the way visit www.makeitbig.com.au if u wanna know wat Rio Tinto is. Hope its good enough. Thank goodness I met the right people. My landlady's daughter, Amanda, works at the mines. I reckon she's like an engineer of some sort. And she's willing to put in a good word for me. So here I am, back in the F&B business, only now with more attitude, and lots more $$$.
I was looking at houses yesterday to see which house I wanna buy within the next 3 years (working at the mines will make this financial goal a reality). My budget will be anywhere between $350K - $550K. Should I get a unit? Apartment? Duplex? Luxury house? Where's the best location? I wan a swimming pool and indoor/outdoor gym. Options, there are so many. Finally, I'm making it big. Hehehe...
Thinking Canning Vale or Winthrop. The difference is staggering. Canning Vale houses are almost HALF the price of houses in the Murdoch area. Geez... anyway... lets not get too excited until AFTER my application pulls thru and I"m actually working there aightz...
DIG, Mind OS. DIG stands for Deep Inner Game while Mind OS is Mind Operating System. I was listening to the cd by Dr Paul http://www.doctorpaul.net/ Its like a super self-improvement cd/DVD programme designed from the analysis of over 24oo psycho-therapists around the world. An integration of ALL of human psychology rolled into over 14-hours seminar on DVD, it promises to teach every aspect of human psychology, from cognitive behaviour to psychoanalysis... pretty much the whole deal. I invested a few hundred bucks to obtain one of these programmes (check the website to find out) and good gawd... I'm not sure if I can even handle it!!
Dr. Paul sayz that it can be used for almost everything... from anger management (I think I need this the most) to depression to building confidence and watever that ever happens in the human mind. I was listening to the cd and FELL ASLEEP cuz like my goodness it was boring as heck... ARRGGHHH!!
MY question... CAN psychology be integrated with Christianity? Is it un-Christian to try to solve life's problems with psychological help? I always know that some for some reason, I NEED psychological help. I'm too hyperactive and WAY too emotional for my own good. Short tempered (I think a lot of people are, but jus dun wanna admit it?), and think too much. I imagine things too much. Errr... yes Christianity is effective but I think there's some things that the church doesnt teach that could be learnt thru science? Can there be a balance of faith and psychology?
It doesnt do anyone any harm to try to use the Mind OS that Dr. Paul has developed. Its been backed up with science and he has helped over 4000 men with the system. Adding all up, Dr. Paul has helped over 12000 people (his patients) get thru depression, self-hate and all that jazz.
I havent actually STARTED using this program cuz its like SO much stuff involved and like, funny how u lose motivation when it comes to self-improvement? I dun even know wat I wanna get out of this programme. Its not Christian in any way, just purely academic. If it works... well.. um... hmm... no harm trying rite...? I might end up being the next CEO of some huge company next time if I put my mind to it. With my communication skills, I believe I have a lot of potential in public speaking and doing presentations in front of large crowds. I've always loved talking to large crowds and well...
who knows...
I finally wrote out my crappy resume (man its been a while since I've ever written ANYTHING like that) to be used in my application to Rio Tinto. By the way visit www.makeitbig.com.au if u wanna know wat Rio Tinto is. Hope its good enough. Thank goodness I met the right people. My landlady's daughter, Amanda, works at the mines. I reckon she's like an engineer of some sort. And she's willing to put in a good word for me. So here I am, back in the F&B business, only now with more attitude, and lots more $$$.
I was looking at houses yesterday to see which house I wanna buy within the next 3 years (working at the mines will make this financial goal a reality). My budget will be anywhere between $350K - $550K. Should I get a unit? Apartment? Duplex? Luxury house? Where's the best location? I wan a swimming pool and indoor/outdoor gym. Options, there are so many. Finally, I'm making it big. Hehehe...
Thinking Canning Vale or Winthrop. The difference is staggering. Canning Vale houses are almost HALF the price of houses in the Murdoch area. Geez... anyway... lets not get too excited until AFTER my application pulls thru and I"m actually working there aightz...
DIG, Mind OS. DIG stands for Deep Inner Game while Mind OS is Mind Operating System. I was listening to the cd by Dr Paul http://www.doctorpaul.net/ Its like a super self-improvement cd/DVD programme designed from the analysis of over 24oo psycho-therapists around the world. An integration of ALL of human psychology rolled into over 14-hours seminar on DVD, it promises to teach every aspect of human psychology, from cognitive behaviour to psychoanalysis... pretty much the whole deal. I invested a few hundred bucks to obtain one of these programmes (check the website to find out) and good gawd... I'm not sure if I can even handle it!!
Dr. Paul sayz that it can be used for almost everything... from anger management (I think I need this the most) to depression to building confidence and watever that ever happens in the human mind. I was listening to the cd and FELL ASLEEP cuz like my goodness it was boring as heck... ARRGGHHH!!
MY question... CAN psychology be integrated with Christianity? Is it un-Christian to try to solve life's problems with psychological help? I always know that some for some reason, I NEED psychological help. I'm too hyperactive and WAY too emotional for my own good. Short tempered (I think a lot of people are, but jus dun wanna admit it?), and think too much. I imagine things too much. Errr... yes Christianity is effective but I think there's some things that the church doesnt teach that could be learnt thru science? Can there be a balance of faith and psychology?
It doesnt do anyone any harm to try to use the Mind OS that Dr. Paul has developed. Its been backed up with science and he has helped over 4000 men with the system. Adding all up, Dr. Paul has helped over 12000 people (his patients) get thru depression, self-hate and all that jazz.
I havent actually STARTED using this program cuz its like SO much stuff involved and like, funny how u lose motivation when it comes to self-improvement? I dun even know wat I wanna get out of this programme. Its not Christian in any way, just purely academic. If it works... well.. um... hmm... no harm trying rite...? I might end up being the next CEO of some huge company next time if I put my mind to it. With my communication skills, I believe I have a lot of potential in public speaking and doing presentations in front of large crowds. I've always loved talking to large crowds and well...
who knows...
Thursday, May 03, 2007
One Step Closer
Howdy HO!!!!!
Yups yups.... I had some big-arse misunderstanding with the CEO of Dorsogna... he accused me of slacking last Saturday and reported to my supervisor Peter. I got yelled at, and the whole week I've been picked on and well, ALL of my overtime has been forfeited. Even after I explained to him that I WAS working with Ali on Saturday and not slacking as I was accused of,... he didnt listen, I'm still being watched over like a hawk, and yups, my working hours has been hacked down so that even casual staff has priority over me. Go figure.
On a PLUS side, I was hired full-time at Level 3 Operator (there's a guy working there for YEARS and he's still in Level 2. Each level is 1 dollar per hour difference. Meaning, I earn 1 dollar per hour more than a Level 2, so Level 3 is o-kay (14.55 per hour). Level 5 which has lots of responsiblities earn 16.55 while supervisors earn close to 20 bucks per hour!!).
Well at this rate, if I'm going to be hawked down up to the point where even CASUAL workers get to work longer hours than me.... is there really a point of me staying at Dorsogna?
Duhhh... Shi En gave me the most humorous answer during cell - 'Carlton, dont simply leave the factory cuz of the current situation. I mean, if u stay there despite what has happened, u prove urself to be the better man. I mean, yeah, PROVE to them that u're not the one at fault. Show them that DESPITE what is going on, that u are the BETTER MAN by staying there and showing that u are truly hardworking. I mean, this is my advice to you. Pray abt it"
BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAVOOOOO!!! Clap clap clap clap!!! I'm almost crying as you said that. Wow, I'm so moved.
Me response - So I stay there and then? Starve to death?
Funny how ppl give u advice when they say things that they have absolutely NO IDEA wat they're talking about? My response is - Why not PUT URSELF IN MY SHOES and then YOU tell ME if u still want to stay there?? (uh believe me, what has happened this whole week, no one in my state would put up with any of that. I've been picked on beyond explanation)
I've been planning to move up-north for AAAAAAAAAAAAGES already manz. Like friggin since early March. I was supposed to move to Broome to work as a cook @ 50+ grand a year. Only drawback is - Broome would also be my grave. Which means I literally migrate to Broome, forsaking EVERYTHING here in Perth. I mean EVERYTHING. Then again Nuno offered me to be Head Chef in a restaurant he planned to own, but due to insane financial circumstances, the deal never pulled thru. SO here I am, still working at Dorsogna, wasting my time, energy, and effort.
So One Step Closer.... I made contact with a particular someone who works at Rio Tinto, the super huge mining company at Pilbara. If all goes well, I send my resume in, voila, its a 2 week on, 1 week off at the mines. As a cook + kitchen hand, with opportunities to become a full-blown chef. All this at 50-60 grand per year. I've been trying to find contacts for like 2 whole months, with no results. Finally, one step closer... to earning big bucks, plus, well, to guarantee that I will FINALLY buy my OWN house with NO financial help from my family watsoever.
IF I can pull this contract thru, I will be...
The most successful child in my WHOLE family who has MADE IT ON HIS OWN without help from family. My mum offered to give me A$30, 000 as a downpayment for my 1st house, but I decline. I wan to make it on my own, with my OWN effort, my own sweat and blood for crying out loud. One step closer to achieving my 5-year plan. BUT....
Not yet finalised... jus one document I need to submit, and a few years of pure torture. Goodness... why cant life become more bearable...
My currently almost-dead-social-life is as dead as it can be,... now I have to almost totally forsake that as well... Imagine working 12-hour shifts 7-days a week for 2 weeks straight, then u get a 1-week off where like, dunno wat on earth u are supposed to do...
Maybe work at Dorsogna as a casual staff? Take up some short courses? Go sarging at random places ('sarging' I mean jus meeting really random ppl at random places) which is like wat the...
All in all, I can get closer and closer to closing down my 1st house, my 1st mortgage, at the expense of my remaining sanity, my remaining social life... well I guess thats it.
Well some people really have life served on a platter (me thinking of 2 ppl whos parents are like millionaires, dun have to worry bout anything). Me not so fortunate. So how? Sit at home and sulk and rant and winge and waste time?
Nah, not me baby. I do watever it takes to be financially sound. To achieve my 5 year goal. Work until die oso nevamind... as long as u dun stress until die can oledi.
Then what.... then.... what? I oso dunno. It still doesnt make me anymore attractive, doesnt make me anything.
Maybe I'll jus die a financially sound super hard working single nutcase. Looks like it huh. Well, wat to do. Jus do it I guess.
Everything else can come later
Already my workmates are telling me not to leave. Cuz they say I make them laugh a lot. I make them laugh so wat... doesnt benefit the planet in any way. Doesnt make me move towards my financial goals at all. Gotta do wat I gotta do manz.
So well.... fingers crossed. See how la. *sigh*. You really cant have everything in life. Gotta always lose something to gain something. But all in all... I think I wont regret this.
Yups yups.... I had some big-arse misunderstanding with the CEO of Dorsogna... he accused me of slacking last Saturday and reported to my supervisor Peter. I got yelled at, and the whole week I've been picked on and well, ALL of my overtime has been forfeited. Even after I explained to him that I WAS working with Ali on Saturday and not slacking as I was accused of,... he didnt listen, I'm still being watched over like a hawk, and yups, my working hours has been hacked down so that even casual staff has priority over me. Go figure.
On a PLUS side, I was hired full-time at Level 3 Operator (there's a guy working there for YEARS and he's still in Level 2. Each level is 1 dollar per hour difference. Meaning, I earn 1 dollar per hour more than a Level 2, so Level 3 is o-kay (14.55 per hour). Level 5 which has lots of responsiblities earn 16.55 while supervisors earn close to 20 bucks per hour!!).
Well at this rate, if I'm going to be hawked down up to the point where even CASUAL workers get to work longer hours than me.... is there really a point of me staying at Dorsogna?
Duhhh... Shi En gave me the most humorous answer during cell - 'Carlton, dont simply leave the factory cuz of the current situation. I mean, if u stay there despite what has happened, u prove urself to be the better man. I mean, yeah, PROVE to them that u're not the one at fault. Show them that DESPITE what is going on, that u are the BETTER MAN by staying there and showing that u are truly hardworking. I mean, this is my advice to you. Pray abt it"
BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAVOOOOO!!! Clap clap clap clap!!! I'm almost crying as you said that. Wow, I'm so moved.
Me response - So I stay there and then? Starve to death?
Funny how ppl give u advice when they say things that they have absolutely NO IDEA wat they're talking about? My response is - Why not PUT URSELF IN MY SHOES and then YOU tell ME if u still want to stay there?? (uh believe me, what has happened this whole week, no one in my state would put up with any of that. I've been picked on beyond explanation)
I've been planning to move up-north for AAAAAAAAAAAAGES already manz. Like friggin since early March. I was supposed to move to Broome to work as a cook @ 50+ grand a year. Only drawback is - Broome would also be my grave. Which means I literally migrate to Broome, forsaking EVERYTHING here in Perth. I mean EVERYTHING. Then again Nuno offered me to be Head Chef in a restaurant he planned to own, but due to insane financial circumstances, the deal never pulled thru. SO here I am, still working at Dorsogna, wasting my time, energy, and effort.
So One Step Closer.... I made contact with a particular someone who works at Rio Tinto, the super huge mining company at Pilbara. If all goes well, I send my resume in, voila, its a 2 week on, 1 week off at the mines. As a cook + kitchen hand, with opportunities to become a full-blown chef. All this at 50-60 grand per year. I've been trying to find contacts for like 2 whole months, with no results. Finally, one step closer... to earning big bucks, plus, well, to guarantee that I will FINALLY buy my OWN house with NO financial help from my family watsoever.
IF I can pull this contract thru, I will be...
The most successful child in my WHOLE family who has MADE IT ON HIS OWN without help from family. My mum offered to give me A$30, 000 as a downpayment for my 1st house, but I decline. I wan to make it on my own, with my OWN effort, my own sweat and blood for crying out loud. One step closer to achieving my 5-year plan. BUT....
Not yet finalised... jus one document I need to submit, and a few years of pure torture. Goodness... why cant life become more bearable...
My currently almost-dead-social-life is as dead as it can be,... now I have to almost totally forsake that as well... Imagine working 12-hour shifts 7-days a week for 2 weeks straight, then u get a 1-week off where like, dunno wat on earth u are supposed to do...
Maybe work at Dorsogna as a casual staff? Take up some short courses? Go sarging at random places ('sarging' I mean jus meeting really random ppl at random places) which is like wat the...
All in all, I can get closer and closer to closing down my 1st house, my 1st mortgage, at the expense of my remaining sanity, my remaining social life... well I guess thats it.
Well some people really have life served on a platter (me thinking of 2 ppl whos parents are like millionaires, dun have to worry bout anything). Me not so fortunate. So how? Sit at home and sulk and rant and winge and waste time?
Nah, not me baby. I do watever it takes to be financially sound. To achieve my 5 year goal. Work until die oso nevamind... as long as u dun stress until die can oledi.
Then what.... then.... what? I oso dunno. It still doesnt make me anymore attractive, doesnt make me anything.
Maybe I'll jus die a financially sound super hard working single nutcase. Looks like it huh. Well, wat to do. Jus do it I guess.
Everything else can come later
Already my workmates are telling me not to leave. Cuz they say I make them laugh a lot. I make them laugh so wat... doesnt benefit the planet in any way. Doesnt make me move towards my financial goals at all. Gotta do wat I gotta do manz.
So well.... fingers crossed. See how la. *sigh*. You really cant have everything in life. Gotta always lose something to gain something. But all in all... I think I wont regret this.
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