a bit of mena chi...

look what i found on one of my walks in may 2005. my parents, who were with me at the time, weren't the slightest bit disturbed by my over-excitement at the discovery. they've just put it down to me being eccentric. bah.

if tit were to look for mena, what better place to start! :O)
this still cracks me up.

drippetydrippetyplop

drip drip drip
the tap leaks
my nose runs
raindrops roll off the window pane

i sneeze
it shakes
the computer
almost breaks

my body needs time out
my mind wants to play
my stuffy nose puts a halt
to the oxygen passage way

gimme a fruit
surely that's key
to make the nose
less leaky

i skip i run i hop hop hop
my leaky nose runs drip drip drop

just a few of my favourite kl things...

where the heart is

cow n chicken

mmm...droolworthy, i swear!

that's what friends are for...good pictures. hehe.

according to this quiz...

Your Nail Polish Color is Black

How you're unique: There's nothing about you that isn't unique Why your style rocks: You are a total indie chick... and you can pull it off What this color says about you: "I'm a trendsetter and don't care what anyone else is doing!"

What Color Nail Polish Best Fits You?

ok. i'm maintaining that the heat has made my nails turn a different shade of COLOUR here (with a li'l help from my mother's friends at the nail shop...). presenting stage 1 of Ops.Makeover-KLstyle. ahem. (help!!)

and yes, that's a flower motif on my big toe. shup.

suasana meriah!

I"VE BEEN EATING practically EVERY WAKING moment since i got here!!!

take today, for instance...after spending the WHOLE morning (i'm talking 4.5hours!!!!!!!!) milling around impatiently at the immigration office (with 100s of disgruntled and unshowered passport seeking citizens) just to submit a renewal form, i was treated to a nasi beriyani lunch by the family, in the sweltering heat. YUMMMMMM! never mind that i've been trying to rid my stomach of the pesky mild food poisoning bug since yesterday...oh, and that i was still in the midst of digesting my b'fast of a roti canai with sambal. ahem.
and then, my bro n his gf took me out to town to have looksy at handyphones...but as my mother predicted, i was to come home later with the dad's same wonky, old mobile i left to town with (which, btw, is only worth RM20 on the market...not that there is even one for it, to begin with, but we just thought we'd ask!). :O) oh well. nothing caught my fancy, and everything that may have sparked a glint of interest was priced out of my budget. but such is...i'll have another browse next week.
so, when we'd decided we'd had enough of mobiles and BO ridden crowds, we decided to plop ourselves down at a coffee bean joint to refuel our individual fatty counts, whilst amusing ourselves with a picture session that only planks of a certain genre would be proud of. heh.
then, we walked a few more rounds, bought some games and dvds, and drove our junk-ship home. upon arrival, i ran to the loo for a quick wash-up, then was picked up by my honorable chindian counterpart for our first night-time outing in 2 WHOLE years. we found parking, skipped to a spanish eating and watering hole in the vicinity to meet up with engaged couple. woogles and i had: a jug of red sangria (ahem...), two tapas, and a warm melty chocolate dessert. ai may & senghong had a beer and a tiramisu. 1.5hours and two vacant chairs later, our table housed a very full & tipsy woogles and a very full & amused me. but right after our last shared morsel of cake, we made our merry way down to devi's corner for a nescafe ais, milo suam, and a plate of mee goreng. ahem. ( and still i wonder why my tummy feels constantly bloated...) :O)
is was 12.20am by then, and we were all set (tummies and otherwise) to roll home. sigh of content. the festivities have begun and are well contained within the confines of my stomach! exercise is in order...maybe next week? :O) heh.
thank you, wooogles!!BIG HUGS!

ah ah yeh yeh

balik kampung....

a) my passport needed to be rescanned in the special office at the oz airport. i was LEAVING the country?! i took my place next to an indian and a chinese. looks-wise, we would have made tourism m'sia proud.
b) i started to choke up when they played a video about 20 mins before landing, highlighting the beauty and progress that only a country so immersed in its overflowing "melting pot" would be able to advertise..do they even know the implications of the melting pot syndrome? never mind. i felt teary anyways. for that split second. and then, i watched the rest of the video through a squint, as only a cynic at her best would. and THEN, i wanted to laugh. because no self respecting country would end a "you've made the ultimate choice in holidaying in m;sia" video without so much as a salam to heart gesture from the the ultimate word on travel and tours, the tourism minister himself. who is no other than the father of a certain bespectacled young man with whom i had add maths tuition with, in upper secondary school. heh.
c) when i was about to leap out into the polluted kl atmosphere (i swear there's a distinct smell), i was wished a "selamat hari raya" in a very natan manner by a stewardess. and she had to repeat herself, cos it didn't register the first time. and as it sunk in, my history and reality of being a malaysian IN malaysia thwacked me on the head...DUH! mat mena. here we go. rock.
d) i rolled my bag out into the mass of people in the arrivals waiting area (most of whom turned out to be very hyper taxi drivers...it was 6.45am!!) and amidst the confusion weaving a 28kg bag through human road blocks, i smiled whilst declining a taxi offer...the doode looks at his friend next to him, "eh...lawa". the friend replies,"yalah, kan gadis malaysia".
OHMYGOODNESS.

i have resolved to practice my bo-chap look. :O) super plank!
in general, its amazing how just by virtue of my looks and gender, i fall into a certain category where even reciprocating a smile (with one of the opposite sex) can bear consequences of quite a traumatising degree.
my memory has been triggered. i'm plugged in. en garde!

handy

yes, for real. those are painted nails. in fushcia, no less. the result of a bims & tit 'we-need-retail-therapy-friday' after work outing.

and that's what it looks like when you plop on an accessory :O) hello!

sunshine through my window!

i sit me down in my little chair
fully intending to get "things" done
but the exciting wafts of summery air
is making it even less than fun

i want to go out and play
allll summmmerrrry dayyy
but everything must be done in moderation
because equilibrium is key
so i'll have to use it as motivation
set in motion the inspiration in me
to get back into action
all the factions
that went a-miss
when i chose to finish
early.

but but but...there is some excitement looming: a quick nip abroad- to think to sort to take a bigass leap and bound onto fertile ground. time to refuel my head...starving of new information.making a mockery the old. has anyone noticed? i certainly have. :O) FEED ME FEED ME.

stapey, if u can't extend long enough...can we meet in sg or kl when you go back? can? can can can? can! ok. set. :O)

lock,stock, and...

the two smoking barrels :O)

in the angsty instance..

consistently so. waves of anger, anguish, and sheer frustration wash over me with about the same frequency as i wash my face (and that's pretty damn regularly..it being a pimple farm and all), everyday. well, everyday save the weekends. :O) it's my favourite!
maybe i'm not toning properly. or locking in all the happy moisturising components with the same vigorous enthusiasm that i do my face-washing. hmmmm.
an ode:
brunch, lunch, tunch. it's all goode. with great, fun-loving companions. heh. the company i keep, the help a heap. they make me laugh, when thing's are tough. but they also present challenges which promote adequate balances in providing support and fuelling of the thought process. you guys eees theee bes.

oh,my mind's everywhere. a heap of things to do. it's difficult to set up boundaries where work is concerned...how much should i involve myself, based on the premise that i am about to set myself adrift tres soon? i mean, i have my starting points, but they're all interconnected with other aspects of this...erm...'project'. and then, of course, there's the bit where i don't feel particularly enthralled at the prospect of having to meet up with the owner of this...erm...'project'...to piece together the missing bits of my dog-eared page, in the bigger picture book. funny that, considering one of my major bugs that finally nibbled its way into my clean pages was about the owner not giving me enough time-of-day to push forward with decisions and the..erm..'project'.

and then, of course, there's the personal.

has the last 2 months of this 5 month long endeavour been a massive reflection of a developing short attention span, on my part? am i a runner, when things don't go my way? do i have issues working under someone of authority? erm no, to that last one. definitely. another lil bug carried with it the discomfort of having no clear boundaries where friendship and employer-employeee/professional relationships were concerned. "i like you as a friend, no doubt. but at the end of the day, you are my boss. and i work for you. i need that sort of clearly defined line, when it's about work".

chewel grows up.

constipated at large

boo. boo who. boo hoo hoo.

yes, that was me. all this 3rd quarter. "time's are a-changing", sang bob dylan. but that's just 'cos it presses on, arbitrarily. yet another man constructed constriction. but when you think it through (poetic sense aside), time repeats itself...it rushes all the way round to come back to its beginning point. "a lil bit of history repeating", said a wise shirley bassey. an endless cycle. nono. it does end. but then it revives itself and makes the trip again. and again. and ...u get the clock. tick tock tick tock.

i digress. perhaps. just a little.

lots lots lots has happened, happening, about to happen. i've got the eye-jerker act almost down to a pat, and soon i'll be invading your tv. hah. the life of the starving artiste. feeding off the mysterious (delusional or otherwise), and miserable misery.

oh to grow wiser and kinder and stronger after this feat.

i'm rambling. but so not a rose. my eyes are fatigue-ridden. my body's been food-abused. the sun's hidden. and it's sleeep i will choose...over elaborate nonsense. today. tonight. alright.

quote of the month: ...you are creatively constipated. that's just what it is".

good golly gumdrops. i simply have to agree.

an ego boost is always good. YEP! :O) iT's FRIDAAYY!!!

Your Vibe Is Somewhat Sexy

On a good day, you're the sexiest woman in the world But on a bad day, you can't help but feel a little average Try to remember the times you've felt the sexiest... And keep that attitude even on the worst of days

How Sexy Is Your Vibe?

back at it...

the creative board has been summoned."ladies and gentlemen, ready,steady,CHURN(out ideas)!". even if my thinking cap (proper) is not on, at least the creative one is sitting pretty on the head (albeit slightly off centre). it's that time of the year where the creative juices flow and most of the output tend towards the warped. :O) hey, i'm a believer in diversity. it makes for an (even more) interesting world. i seriously think that we, humans, thrive on the complicated. as much as we're conditioned to accept the fact that we're all the same (essentially), it really is beautiful to embrace our differences as well. i remember researching for an essay on multiculturalism, and coming across many articles opposing the idea of actually highlighting cultural differences in communities. this is based on the notion that it is a form of racism. by pointing out the differences (be it through celebration or otherwise) we would be able to identify and use (according to one's evil discretion, assumably) to pick on the 'weaker' race. at the time of writing the essay, i thought it was really an interesting take on the idea of multiculturalism..a concept condoned more so by Asian countries (or rather, leaders of Asian countries). but having just had 3 weeks worth of world-watching and having lots of time on my hands to contemplate about everything (from the menial to the more complex issues that make up one's existence/co-existence with the rest of the planet), i'm even more convinced that noticing the contrasts differences make (be it small or big) should be encouraged. of course there will always be issues. but that's just the human spirit. call it self-sabotage. we need to have that struggle in order to find satisfaction...

and no. this isnt me trying to sound philosophical, at all. just some of the mumbo-jumbo swirling around in the head and causing interruption of coherent thought. heh..syncopated rhythm and blues...that's me at the mo. mind playing around with ideas and wreaking havoc...making a something out of nothing. as usual it's right on cue,just when i need to get down to work proper. ahhhh....self sabotage!!!!!!!!!!

(/p>
feeling "too young to hold on, too old to just break free and run.."(jeff buckley).

shuffling blonde...

OHMYGOOOODNESSS..jeff buckley totally hits the note with my soul at the moment. winter has descended upon us, and i'm keeping warm and cosy with my fave tunes from my darker-hued collections. funny that, how i seem to thrive on the sad tunes to keep me (ridiculously) happy during the shorter colder days. well, i'm not quite stuck in the throes of winter music emo yet, so i've got my slow tracks (more tempo effect, rather than lyrics) in the set just for good measure. heh. shuffle mode rocks. i've got bread, interpol, the beatles, damien rice, jeff buckley, diana krall, and aqualung. if i could be bothered, i would put the shins ('those to come') in the line up as well. but really, jeff buckley's 'last goodbye'...OHhhh. who can live without it...thank you for the music.

whoa. major update session needed. even the pics are looking a bit blah. morning walks are in order! the lack of attention to my blogalog says it all, well most of it. the last 2 (!!) months were filled with time-consuming activities- casual work (unlimited hours, cos that's how i came packaged), sleep (or lackthereof..ahem), illness(es of varying degrees). oh and the usual do-nothing-worrry of job applications (or, again, lackthereof). ah. trivial matters, surely. yes, admittedly. but prioritisation is something i need to work on (so i've been wisely advised). and so i shall, with my priority pen and priority paper. oh, and my relaxed/revamped/toughened (pudgy) body and (prioritised)mind. ok, so maybe not the mind as yet, but it'll come to soon (ish) and we'll be sorted. sor'ed.
cruising down the freeway...LIFE IN THE FAST LANE. 'cept i'm choosing to drive slow :O)
oh and south island is gorgeous. i wanna live in a place like that when i wind down and kick up the heels. (mena, we could come to a compromise? scotland in summer..)

one more for the road...

stapes again...hey, at least we know my role in our 'old-age' relationship. heh. ok, "i will do the dishes, if you'll pay all the bills..",cowgirl. but if my brain leans towards the female... doesnt that actually make me more male? hmmmm...and besides, thinking with the heart is such a male thing. :O)

Your Brain is 73.33% Female, 26.67% Male

Your brain leans female You think with your heart, not your head Sweet and considerate, you are a giver But you're tough enough not to let anyone take advantage of you!

What Gender Is Your Brain?

nonsensism...

the prism of colours with which we choose to colour our memories and glaze over the negative is certainly a contributory factor in accomodating feelings of nostalgia and longing - especially when one wishes to escape the present and its obstacles. we dream in black and white? so, when we rest and relax, all thoughts (because we're never really able to rid ourselves of ourselves)and visuals conceived are really just 'rough' pieces. having to juggle colours in one's sleep, doesn't sound too appealing...especially if one has problems doing so even when fully conscious (by societal standards, of course). so, shouldn't our colourful efforts of being able to paint a picture, so enticing that it invites notions of escapism, be applauded? executing the right to artistic license and all. gives one something to think about...it's all in the mind. :O)

W.I.P...almost..

strange lil girl..(as the stranglers would put it)

"..i'm not aware of too many things, i know what i know, if you know what i mean..."edie brickell and the new bohemians. totally makes sense. to me. like most of my output, anyways, where no thought is given to the consequences that will inevitably ensue..until mid-sentence. and by then, it's usually too late. hah. master of manipulation i am not. (dammit..that leaves out politics from the prospective careers list then..spin doctor and all). it is a form of sensationalism though. depending on how you look at it(a lil more to the left). never mind that it could be the most boring of subject matters, the statement/question once dampened out whilst in the mind's of others will now have a new lease of life..living life out loud, even. :O)
BUT, in my defense, maybe it's a type of trait/characteristic (stupidity?)that is, really, an inherent part of one's cultural background...ok, so leave out the alcohol in the equation, and maybe it's just a chindian thing. hey, we're a special bunch. we pack a punch. i'm tired (finally), my eyes hurt. my toes burn. anyone got an extra sleep card lying around? i'd like to trade one of my hyppy-haper ones at the mo. wise-app phase.

music to my ears..

words to my hands, warmth to my heart.

the strangest feelings..

i woke up with a start today. actually, i jolted in and out of the somewhat strange state of slumber (if at all it was that) several times throughout the course of the morning. yes, i crawled into bed at 3am but then managed to keep a two-hourly vigil on my clock all the way to 7.30am. and that's when i decided that i'd had enough...did a bit of a walkabout in the apartment...and then made a conscious decision to not go for my morning walk. why? well, besides having majorly puffy eyes and an achy body, i wasn't feeling in the right frame of mind. actually feeling out of sorts. perturbed, ever so slightly. as with all dreams, i remember only fragments of it. the bits just before i woke up each time. and that last time, i was overcome by an overwhelming sense of sadness. whilst i can't really pinpoint which part of the vague dream fragment caused the descend into that unstable emotional state, it was one of those that hit a nerve of some sort. maybe i've just had too much of nothing on my mind, perhaps causing the soul to search with a greater need...therefore becoming more attuned/aware/sensitive to the surroundings..to others. i'm creeping myself out. maybe i need to be sucked into a vacuum for a while.

schmoozing for stapey...

nye'04-fed sq

of arachnophobics and g'days...

come come. let me share some of my amazing stories in wonderland this year, thus far. for starters, the new year was ushered into melbourne in true city style..with all the fanfare of a two-session fireworks display (9.30 for kids and midnite for the rest), a two and a half hour Cat Empire gig (part of their ATTACK tour),DJs, a dance stage, pub overspills, police, police, drunks,police,annoying teenagers, even more annoying families with terrors-on-wheels..you get the general idea. but i have to say, that i had a pretty goode night myself. it was a relatively quiet evening complete with libation (copious,p'haps, but responsible as always!), highly entertaining company, a crazy reason to hop into a cab 15 minutes before midnight, a wicked crazy cabby who gave us a wicked crazy ride back to the city with 5 mins to spare, and a numb arm by the end of the night. hah. good times. and i had that numb arm as a constant reminder for a whole two weeks after.
everything else has been pretty much as you'd expect it to be during summer, out here in good ol' melb. even the weather...not that it's been all that hot, this year. just a smattering of scorchers, for good measure, to reinstate the fact it is supposed to be summer. good news for the winter flabs, though. still ample opportunity to cover-up whilst shaping up and shipping out the old flabs to make way for the onset of new ones next month. oh, and bikinis are a fashion faux pas, this summer. wraps, cardigans, leggings are the way to go..don't believe me? ask the dishes.. they can sing they can dance...
:O)

minz, u need to edit this as best you can. my intellect only seems to kick in when on msn. somehow. actually, i'll go over it in the morning. this is 1st draft. set.

ALSO, of the two who stuck it out here after everyone else left for greener pastures (job-wise), one of us has been officially inducted into the laidback matey system (on so many levels), whilst the other just has to hop back in for a bit to reap the results of her year long endeavours too. and for the record, oz has WAY more weirdos and crazies traipsing around the place. cafes are NOT the place to pick up. ok. set.
whilst there are all the perks of city living, oz style, it is still very much outback in nature. no really. for example, one will still find the hugest ass spider lurking in the corner of a very enclosed area (a stiflingly stuffy room is nothing compared to having an eight-legged visitor from an open sliding door). having no outback jack at my immediate beck and call, i had to rely on my own resourcefulness (and quick thinking..or lackthereof) to lure the creep(y crawley) out of my humble abode. so i grabbed the only piece of machinery in the house that i was quite confident of a) working b)being able to reach the ceiling with. yes, i got it out...and generously gave it the shelter and warmth of the vacuum bag..a new home to make babies, no less. pimples aside, sitting in a room of growing dust mounds is manageable. even embarrassment is not enough to steer me in the direction of the storage cupboard to get the (possibly) spider-ridden vacuum out. it doesn't help that i saw the biggest ass spider (another one ok) climbing the window of the neighbour downstairs. needless to say, i did a paranoid routine check of all the sliding doors and latches. (you never know spiders these days...they may come equipped with latch-opening skills..eight legs to spare and all). what with a juice galavanting through the island east of the peninsular with camera crew in tow, and a chezel attending to domestic issues (dust,creepies,appliances), the melbourne connection looks all set to rock and roll into the next phase..over and out.

food for thought..

bon apetit

dinner at my place..really, what more need i say? :O) well, no one keeled over in the aftermath of food consumption (at least not whilst still in the vicinity), and that's always a good sign. thoroughly enjoyed myself, nonetheless. sunday's are like that. especially when one doesnt have the overwhelmingly dreadful shadow of "THE" monday looming closer every hour. but then, after 2 weeks of having every day feel like a glorious sunday, one begins to appreciate it less. it becomes awfully mundane and, worse still,makes one lose that sense of spontaneity that comes with having a timetable or schedule..a life, basically. yes, people,my current study of the self has just unearthed a dirty secret of societal conventions-having ample time to enjoy the little pleasures that make up the bigger picture equates to having an unfulfilled existence equates to being aimless (again,i'm choosing to not elaborate), therefore rendering the person void by society's standards. well, ok. not entirely void. but just by virtue of being indifferent to the rush and hustle-bustle of the current generation's mass lifestyle, one becomes an outsider (a harsh term, on all levels) and therefore needs to retreat further..more often than not, into the shell of conformity. really, we could learn a thing or two about living harmoniously-in-diversity from jelly bellys. human beans are the way to go. now, excuse me while i scamper off to the kitchen in search of a glucose-ridden food item. my sugar levels are relatively low for a tuesday at the mo.

self-discovery

again, i must thank stapey for fuelling my (purely academic) interest in the self. case study #1. :O)

You Are Sensual Sexy You exude a luxiourous sensuality in your everyday life Turning heads every where you go, it's all about your sexy attitude. You're naturally hot - gorgeous in both sweats and stilettos. Your biggest problem is that your utra sexy self sometimes scares men away. What Kind of Sexy Are You? Take This Quiz :-)

in festive mode...

i spent time with my beloved melbourne connection (rainbows and all) tonite. we feasted on the MOST AWESOME spread, cooked with love by our resident Chef Extroardinaire, alan (also part-time Artistic Director of Tony&Delon). MUCH APPRECIATED!!! it was really a nice way to usher in the new year...began with an early(!) walk to the city, compulsory after-quitting-visit to the cafe, holiday indulgences..ok, more of it... (jack johnson tix; ACO gig tix), lunch with brydz & tori, coffee at the cafe (again), window shopping, chit-chatted (in true CNY fashion) over dinner (and the tv) with the boys, random music conference with dede (other half of Tony&Delon),coffee (...what's one more cup..),and greeted the second day of new year with yet another rambling-babbling session with mals. celebration, indeed. :O)here's hoping everyone has an amazing start to the year, complete with prosperity and joy throughout (all four quarters, no less)!

everyone at home: you're in my thoughts always.lurveyalots. BIG HUGS!

keong hee fatt choy!kua chee..that's what we're missing. :O)

""WHEN I'M IN YOUR ARMS, NOTHING CAN BRING ME DOWN.."ben kweller.

whirlwind heat..name of a band i saw a year and a half ago. really catchy. the name's just on my mind. funny that, considering i'm having massive problems remembering what i did yesterday. just keeping track of my days is a whole activity in itself. the time and effort that goes into jotting down the miscellaneous bits and pieces that make up a day in my current unemployed state is (almost) commendable. having said that, i'm having trouble taking things one step at a time with everything else. i want it all now. i want to skip steps. hop hop hoppety hop skip LEAP. you'd think after all these years, i would've learnt how to eat one well-chewed mouthful at a time..even when carrying a full platter. well, it's not really a WANT. all comes down to impatience. which, of course, is wonderful at this very moment because it is only the most important part of the entire process...THE BEGINNING.oh here's another one: PROCRASTINATOR. no really. that soooooo wasn't obvious. JUST GIMME A JOB, dammit. i'm an earnest learner, hardworking, passionate about getting the job done (wa...at?...hello?), loyal. Come come. surely there's a need for some honest to goodness employees who are willing to be severely underpaid and doggedly overworked (complete with beaming smile, albeit slightly baggy, bloodshot eyes) out there? practically free labour. (ME ME ME) offer for limited time only.

but on this fluffy cloud i have chosen to perch myself on, there is always ample room for happy thoughts and moments (no matter how forgetful i am...plaguing mindlessness and all) of appreciation for the people around me, and their enduring patience (through my rambling impatience) and support (this really is one of those words that allows for me to be concise..as opposed to elaborating...yes, the general idea..). i sigh with content..for now.

HAPPPPPPPPPPYYYYYYYYYYYYYY NNNNNNEEEEEEWWWWWWW YYYYYYYEEEEEAAAAAARRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!
21 days in..3 weeks...summmer heat,good company,fun fun fun. my memory isn't reallly doing anything for me at the moment..all the more reason to jot down all the miscellaneous details of the past 3 weeks of activity. entertaining and exciting on a whole new level, in relation to the most of last year's entertaining and exciting. yes, i am indeed living life out loud...possibly indulging in the most hedonistic of ways, but i've decided to let the hair down (yes, it's grown again and i'm considering yet ANOTHER haircut) and enjoy the big and small bits that form our very beings in this co-existence..my atom-ic self is bouncing around with all the other atoms in the widespread magic-coloured atmosphere. LITTLE RIPPLES OF EFFECT. bounce bounce bounce.. I LURVE YOU ALL...YOU lil BOMBS THAT MAKE MY LIFE THAT mUCH LOVELIER. BIG BIG BIG HUGS. oh indeed the new year is in. :O)